Alcohol loosens inhibitions. Is this really news? I would find it much more interesting to know whether these women also consider themselves alcoholics, as "binge drinking" is rather loosely defined as having more than a certain number of drinks in a certain amount of time, despite the fact that different people react to alcohol much differently.

As for not being able to sleep with someone while sober, that's a depressing idea. While I do choose to drink wine with most of my dinners, I don't describe this behaviour as "hitting the sauce," nor would I consider any sex I had after drinking this moderate amount to be "booze-induced" or otherwise harmful. But it depends on what your drinking behaviours are like; I'm married and don't drink alone, nor to excess. Frankly, I prefer my sex sober, but I see nothing particularly harmful about having sex while drunk if both parties are consenting.

dont guys drink alot before sex too? I'm curious what the breakdown is for them...

How about the fact that one technically cannot consent to sex under the influence of alcohol?

i think that's ridiculous, i'm pretty sure you can consent to sex while being drunk...regretting and wishing you did something different is not the same as consent.

I've NEVER drank before having sex, not even the wild, random hookups. I like remembering all the details

I am almost positive that I've only had sober sex while in a relationship, and most of my first time sex has also been while drunk or drinking. I am now in a long term, mostly sober relationship so it's hard to imagine things how they used to be- but I honestly don't find any of those statistics all that shocking!

oh god. of course its about how women like to get drunk before aex and not MEN and women. i guess i do resort to a bit of alcohol when i hook up with someone for the first time. but its usually just the ice breaker. i def don't NEED alcohol to have sex though. and after i've been -there- with that person i can do it again 100% sober. buut i do like to have sex when i drink.. and pretty much always want to do the dirty if i'm drunk soo.. BUT most men i know are the same way.

@susanj: And I respect your opinion. I'm just relaying what I learned in rape crisis counseling and women's studies classes. I'm not even sure I believe it, as I tend to see it as you do.

Yep, alcohol loosens inhibitions and I can attest to the best sex encounters being had while I was slightly inebriated. Here's the more interesting question to me though: Exploring my experiences and what I was taught as a child, what did I observe or experience that made me feel insecure about sex? What does the younger or more liberated woman know that I don't? How can the message about sex, healthy sex be communicated to more women?

I tried to find some statistics on mens alcohol consumption & sex, but all that (quickly) came up was this article on drinking and erectile dysfunction:

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,24960338-421,00.html

The picture that accompanies the article says a lot about these statistics mentioned here about women - I think. Alcohol & Women is a winning combination in the world of advertising. In most ads - women appear to actually be served up along with the drinks. It's disgusting but it's the norm! SKYY, Bacardi, Cabo Wabo, Belvedere, Cutty Sark - and it's been that way forever. The message is: Booze makes you feel sexy - and in a world of growing need for convenience & instant gratification it doesn't surprise me that people are taking the shortcut to getting turned on rather than taking the time to be in touch with their bodies & their partners in a sober fashion.
The other message is that not only does it make you "feel" sexy - it makes you desirable by men.

Oh goodie.

Only eight men? Jeez, then I guess I must be in Wilt Chamberlain territory. Man. ;-)

I mean, I am in my 40s and have never been married, but still. Eight is really considered a large number? Are we that puritan?

I'm not down for men setting sexual standards for women. Period.

I expect that this study DOES also exist for men, and, like it or not, socialogical studies are, nearly always broken down into groups- otherwise the statistics are not particularly useful. Men and women, whether because of culture or what-not tend to view sex differently, and, thus, it makes sense to break the study down in this way. I would be curious what the statistics look like for men, though, having seen these for women.

And for what it's worth - and I'm in a long term "sober" relationship - I get pretty horny when I drink.

Laura T, I'm with you. I'm 33 and single and have had a few long-term relationships as well as, ahem, a few shorter-term ones. How in the name of all that is good in the world could I possibly be at just 8? Ha.

I do drink "before bedding down." Alcohol does make me want to get naked. And everyone looks hot when I’m drunk enough (including me). Moreover, only when inhibited would it make sense to rip off a shirt I just spent 50 bucks on.

I say all that to say all this ... hell yeah i drink .. but i am not alone because my male partners hit the sauce just as much if not more. Perhaps whoever came up with these statistics should evaluate American society sex life because finding someone who hasn't gotten drunk and laid would be damn near impossible...

Speaking as a man here, this study fails to mention the fact that lots of men (not me, mind you) try to get women drunk in order to seduce them. If you factor that in this research takes on a whole different meaning.

So that's how you get a research article talked about in the papers when your results are completely flimsy!

I find this really sad. Alcohol doesn't just lowering inhibitions, it also numbs sensation and makes you forget certain things. I don't drink in general, because I always like to keep a clear head. And sex is just too important to me to not want to remember.

And yes, David, it is ignoring that fact. And yes, Magg, a sober person having sex with a drunk person can be see as sexual assault, even if the drunk person consents. Because being drunk can so lower inhibitions and your ability to make decisions.

I drink on the regular and I will openly admit that I have frequently bedded down my partner after a night out. It is a personal preference. If it works for you so be it if not then don’t. I do think that it should have been a fair “survey” and they should have also interviewed men. Who in the hell do they think we are dinking with before we go to bed?
The fact that the average woman has slept with 8 men to me is a crock! Did they survey 18 year freshman college students in front of their parents?

I think BUST should post a new survey for all of to take part in.

Don't get me wrong I think sex is great. But have you ever stopped to think about how odd it is? The actual reality of what goes on? The fluids? The noises? Perhaps a drink is just what women and men need to shut off their logical thinking and get down to business!

What annoys me most about this survey (also featured on The View this morning and I'm sure elsewhere), is that its a tactic to make women look bad and reflect on their "self esteem". While I'm 100% sure that men also drink before sex, I think that part of the reason women this is an issue is that women are still considered the "weaker" sex. Well, what if the women are just out to have a good time and are the one's making the move, or is it to be understood that men are taking advantage of people who've imbibed? For me, this reflects harshly on our society (and I use "our" universally). I've been there and for this reason have cut back on my own drinking.....I'm curious though how the statistics compare in urban city centers vs. more rural communities.

"75% of women like to drink before bedding down"

DANG! What does that say about the guys?!?! LOL. I'd be pretty upset if my hubby had to be drunk before getting lovey.

MEN: It sounds like you need to step up your game!

And as for "the average woman has slept with eight men" ...

DUDES: How about a little staying power? Maybe try to treat your lady right? Be faithful to her, don't abandon her, and at least TRY to make her want to stick around?

I think this survey reveals a huge relational rift between the sexes.

Many women have sex after a date or a fun night out and most of us drink under those circumstances. As do the men we might bring home.
Anyway, our culture sends messages to women that they shouldn't ask for what they want,especially when it comes to sex. What better way to lose those inhibitions then to have a drink?
It's really sad that people still think women can't make good decisions- about drinking, sex or anything else.

"The fact that the average woman has slept with 8 men to me is a crock! Did they survey 18 year freshman college students in front of their parents?" - Nola Belle

Right? I know this is mostly a discussion about drinking and sex, but this really was the glaring "fact" that I just couldn't stop laughing about. I mean, it doesn't matter how many people one has slept with. I just think that setting the bar at a one digit number is hilarious at best.

If women and men looking to get hooked up at a bar, then how unreasonable would it be if they were drinking.

8 is an average, some less, some more. I'd guess we who read Bust aren't going to bring down the average. I think a Bust survey is in order.

Advertising is most often aimed at women, not men. Alcohol ads, except beer, are aimed at women. We buy more of everything, except beer.

I have to admit to enjoying a man's having had more to drink than I have so that I could manipulate the situation.

and what about all the times i said no to sex while barely able to form sentences!!?... like sex while drunk can be an awful lot of fun but its not like girls always loose their ability to say no after a few drinks....

and anytime ive had drunk sex, apart from when it was with someone i was in a realationship with, the guy was easily as drunk as me... it seems a joke to do a survey like this and not have male results available.

I think sex just loosens things up, for all sexes. That's not really news worthy. But NEEDING alcohal to have sex is different than choosing to drink it in order to calm your nerves or loosen up.

Not being unfair or bias but the social and moral views of men and women differ immensely! Men love to drink but definitely LOVE sex even more and damn sure don't need any imbibing to be rearing, ready and willing 2 go. Women on the other hand have so much more issues thanks to society's definition of how a "lady/woman" should behave regarding sexual matters, thus all the inner moral conflicts, self esteem issues, etc...Men certainly don't need alcohol as a crutch to give in to or curb our inhibitions, we're already sex-starved, horny jackassed opportunists who'll jump at sex under any physiological circumstances...starved, drunk, angry, half asleep, depressed, you name it! With all the seemingly endless reasons or "excuses" women have for choosing who to or NOT to hook up with, it only makes sense that alcohol makes it easier and gives em that perfect "excuse" to chuck those inhibitions right out the window.

What drives me particularly apeshit about studies like these is the way they're presented as though 1)women are "bad" for liking to drink before they have sex and 2) it's all the woman's fault for not being able to relax on her own. We almost never talk about how perhaps alcohol, used judiciously, might be a fine thing on, er, certain occasions, and we don't want to touch the reality that for many of us, sex is fraught with an awful lot of baggage. No, it's just "Get over it, and don't drink before sex." Real helpful.

Oh, and gods forbid we help men learn to become better lovers. What? WHAT?!

ha - gals need the mental lube to cope with the lousy lay most "dudes" provide...

Yeah, and their failure to understand that "Let's have sex" does not constitute foreplay, and we are not frigid bitches for thinking so.

Pardon the phallocentrism here...also, if you are one of those rare males who understands that "let's have sex" does not constitute foreplay, and you're not an asshat about that, well, yay.

Drinking before sex is terrible, at least for me. I can't really focus on what is going on and, most importantly, getting off is nearly impossible. I get frustrated, he gets frustrated and it's just a disaster all around. After a few experiences like this I now NEVER have sex and drink. I like orgasms. Why would I do anything to hinder their awesomeness?!

OMG - this is too funny. I learned in college that statistics are always skewed based on what is wanted at the time and this definately proves it. I am a single 55 yr old female and I wish I had only dealt with 8 men! My last man was a drink-before-sex guy - I wasn't. Imagine that! hahaha He needed to calm down. The only enebreated sex I've had stunk. I go out to a bar and drink Long Island Ice Teas - sometimes 5 and never take anything home with me. Guess that disproves the theory that drunk means no judgement hahaha.

Depending on where the survey was held (if it was held in a bar, for instance, that would GREATLY affect the answers) and the age group they were surveying (I bet 20s-30s are way more insecure than 40s-60s), I suppose I could find them believable, but it does obviously have at least somewhat sexist motives in that they did not ask men the same question. I bet the stats would've been much higher for men.

ok, so here's my question.. what about statistics on having sex high? i'm not a big pothead, but will admit that the best orgasm i ever had was when i was under the influence of the gange!!!

I think the best sex usually does occur when the woman has had one or two, and her partner (if male) is sober. Why? Because men are generally only worried about their own orgasm when they've been drinking, and I'm pretty sure their sensation is lowered because it takes them way to long to get off, and they end up being too fast and rough. On the other hand, a few drinks can relax a woman, make her a little less inhibited and therefore more likely to ask unabashedly for what she wants. Then, if her (male) partner is sober, he's along for the ride, generally hoping to please her first.

For me personally, a married woman with a 15 month old baby, it was hard getting back into sex because it was painful at first after giving birth, and it was hard to feel sexy/sexual again after so long, and I found it helped to have a few drinks to loosen me up, make me feel warm and fuzzy, but I don't NEED to drink to have sex because I am with the right person, and he makes me feel good no matter what, and I think that's the ticket. Too many women are led to believe (at a young age) that sex makes a relationship, instead of learning that it should be the other way around. Good sex usually happens between two people who mutually trust each other.

i lost my virginity while drunk, second guy i was not drunk when we first hooked up. third guy, i was drunk. fourth guy, i was sober. fifth guy i was not drinking when we hooked up for the first time, sixth guy i was drunk, and was the brother of number 3, seventh guy i was drunk every time we had sex, number eight, who is now my husband, i was drunk the first time we had sex.

i guess i meet a lot of the statistics...but i was shy and met most of my drunken encounters at parties or bars through friends.

I've told several friends about this survey since this morning and already the running gag for the next week is just looking at one of them and saying "Eight? Really? Eight?"

This is just another way for the conservative males to assert that women are loose and immoral and that it's the fault of the feminist movement, wacka wacka, blah blah blah.

Aside from the fact that this study is bull$hit and horribly offensive, may I just state that the reason why sex happens when drunk is bc while sober, most of us wouldn't sleep with that douchebag down the hall or Bob from accounting.

Has no one noticed that this was a survey of 3,000 women (that's right, no men) that was conducted by a cosmetics company? Says so right there at the bottom of the Daily News article.

So:
-they didn't even talk to men for any sort of comparison or to see if this behavior has to do with gender or if it's just what people do.
-I REALLY doubt that this was an unbiased survey; they most likely went in looking to justify a conclusion they'd already made.

Also, this says little to nothing about American sexual mores; the study was conducted in Britain.
Not that American women don't do this; but you can't assume these numbers would be the same in the US.

On the discussion though, I've gotta say that the only time I had sex drunk was kind of a disappointment. But then booze just makes me really sleepy, so yanno.

"There are three types of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."

This is totally bogus. Both women and men get tipsy b/c that's what (most) people do when they're on the dating scene...

Not sure about those 1 in 6 ladies, they're probably just not confident period.

Ok, so I must be really lame having sex with only one guy and then marrying him. But-I've definitely been drunk maybe 50% of our sexytimes. Not a confidence thing for me at all. I just like to get drunk and horny on Friday and Saturday nights. I find sex is a lot more -fun- when I am/we are inebriated. The rest of the time, I'm ready to go if my bra and panties match, or if they don't, I take them off and then I'm ready to go!

I agree there needs to be a Bust version of this survey. Let's get some real statistics.

I guess I'm a total prude; I've only been with one guy. :p I waited a looong time to lose my virginity, too. (But that was my choice. No, really! I was a big baby.) I'm still with the guy.

I've only been drunk before sex a few times, and I thought it was totally awesome. If I was able to have a shot or two beforehand every time, I would be pretty okay with that. It's fun both ways.

8 men?

I fucked 28 men before I was fifteen......in fact I had a list that I checked off.... I was into being "the girl you'll never forget" ie fun and good in bed....it's a bit fucked up but that is what I was into at the time...
blessings om all

was I drunk most of the time? Probably.

Because it is hard to approach someone sober...am I right? Now that I am a big old middle-aged adult I figger it is OK to just come up to a dude and/or chick and say .....wanna fuck?...

alll I want is to be abler tp have a decent conversation...I want to talk about zMeister Eickhart and St. Augudtine...Derrida and whatev=ah....love and love

108 men, so majick number. Lost my virginity in 1975 (at 11....eeek) and have been going strong since,,,,, I love my number, I am totally Ok with being a "slut". When You break it down it is not so many! I remember every single person, and had a reason for each. Come the 80s and up I made sure to have safe sex...always a condom. I might sound like a slut..BUT.. I have never had an STD. NEVER. I am 100%
clean. Clean slut!

the best sex is sober sex...but to get it properly, it seems like you have to fuck him or her once or twice...probably drunk..so you can subsequently get aquainted like family like a good old person.....I've been drunk every time I fucked someone the first time...dutch courage!

I love it when you become close...usually in a day or two and you have transcendant sex tht kick-starts your nerve endings.

ali:

sooo, im guessing you're single right?

Once again, so-called scientists are taking a correlation and calling it causation. It's true that the first time I've slept with a new partner is after drinking, but that's generally because one of the places people my age meet new people is at a bar! And generally, the first few dates are either over dinner and/or at said bar, so there's going to be alcohol involved. That doesn't mean that women are unable to have sex without drinking. If we could meet nice guys at the laundromat rather than the pub, there would be a lot fewer drunken hookups... but I doubt there would be fewer hookups.

Eight? Yikes! I'm over my quota. There's about 25-30 of your who are going to have to promise never to have a sex again to make this all work out right in the end. Mathematically speaking. Unless of course the ones I was too drunk to remember don't count.

Eww i hate drunk sex-all the movement gets me all sloshy and nauseous. However, I do LOVE some stoned screwing. And I can enjoy it completely sober just as much.

This article has made me paranoid and irrational for days now, like I need to sew her up down there before I exceed eight partners . . . I'm so sick of shit that makes women feel slutty and bad.

I don't need alcohol to feel sexy. I have noticed that when I drink, I am more disinhibited and worry less about the every day stressors which may interfere with sexual relations. I wonder if the study is merely observing how stressful women's lives can be and not self-esteem issues. 1 out of 6 women who proposed to gain confidence from alcohol is not statistically significant. And c'mon, why do we always have to be saddled with having low self-esteem. Can we really trust a cosmetics company to do meaningful research about our lives anyways?

that used to be me-i also lost my virginity while drunk and 14 with someone i just met. that was not my goal, but with the alcohol, was that consent?
anyhow, i lost count how many men and how many times, don't remember their names and probably wouldn't recognize some anymore either. So what?
we are all different. and i'm sure some men could say the same thing. Only now i realize i was a practicing alcoholic, and i've been sober for years. So the orgasms are so much better now and i dont pass out in the middle of sex and best of all---i don't have sex with someone gross, because i have my jugement!

My wife *insists* on getting drunk before sex!

It depends on my mood. Sometimes when I'm drunk I will be a little more forward than I might otherwise be... alcohol does, after all, lower your inhibitions. But I don't go out of my way to get drunk to enjoy sex. I'm surprised to hear that people do that to be honest, but then on the scale of things I guess I shouldn't be!