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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
lightchested
post Dec 16 2008, 08:34 PM
Post #2781


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Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


Any guy saying he prefers small breasts is cool. I have no problems with that statement.

The lukewarm responses I was referring to are:

"Small ones are okay": This is lukewarm at its best. It implies, to me, a grudging acceptance, like, "Well, if that's the best you can do...that's okay." How big of him to be so understanding. Because of course our breast size is so important to HIM (any man). Who are THEY when it comes to our breasts? Who has to deal with the fibrocystic pain? Who has to worry about cancer? Who has to find a bra that fits??? Where is this man in all that? He just wants a toy. To comment on a gift like that is just rude. Imagine giving someone a Christmas gift, and they say, "This is okay." That's not good enough. Fake it if you have to, but for God's sake show a little respect and gratitude about a woman's breasts. That's how I feel.

"As long as it has a nipple I'm happy": This offends me for two reasons. One is that many times guys say this when they don't know if a woman actually still has her nipples. Women who have had breast surgery sometimes lose theirs, so I find it EXTREMELY offensive when a man acts as though this is all that is important TO THEM for some kind of entertainment purposes, when that entertainment value is nothing compared to how important those nipples are/were to the women who have lost theirs. And to hear this must be a knife. I hope no women who has had hers removed has ever had to hear this phrase, but I doubt it. Even if they heard it BEFORE they had to have theirs removed (we've all heard it)...how would that make a woman feel when she is faced with a mastectomy, thinking back on these heartless comments that men have made? Now besides that reason, I just find it crude that we "owe" men some kind of entertainment, and apparently the nipple is "the least we owe". I just don't think we owe them a god ****** thing. Not even a nipple. If they can't be happy without one, then **** them.

"Anything more than a mouthful is a waste": This says to me, "I wish there were more, but oh well...good enough." (I hope I'm not making anyone feel bad...I know I'm overly sensitive on these things and see them negatively)

"Guys like all breasts, regardless of size": This says to me, "We PREFER big ones of course, but we manage to find some merit in the small ones." (I know I'm sensitive!) It doesn't tell me they LIKE small ones necessarily, but that they lump us into the "general breast" category, to which they can apply their "breasts are good" rule. But it doesn't give me the impression a guy is happy to be with ME (or rather with MINE), but rather that he's happy he is with BREASTS. Maybe I am a narcissist, but I want someone to say, "DAMN! LOOK AT THOSE!" about my particular breast configuration, not "I LIKE BREASTS AND THOSE THINGS YOU'RE SPORTING THERE LOOK LIKE THEY FALL WITHIN THE GENERAL BREAST CATEGORY."

"I like small ones", said in a "wow! believe it or not!" tone of voice that denotes some kind of FAVOR that the man is doing for me: This is different than "I prefer small ones". When said in the tone of voice I described it is more of a "If you can believe this...I will actually find a way to amuse myself with small ones!" In the same way someone might say, "I like the smell of gasoline!" Is gasoline really what anyone WISHES to be smelling at any particular moment? It's more like some people find it surprisingly bearable, in its own way. But when people say they like the smell, they use a tone of voice that says, "Believe it or not..." as though it is hard to wrap one's mind around liking such a smell. This is the tone of voice I'm referring to that, when accompanying, "I like small breasts!" makes my skin crawl.

Overall, the idea of any guy making a comment about breasts from a "man's point of view" I find revoltingly patronizing. Why do they think we care what they think? Do they think we sit around worried about how THEY feel about what's on OUR bodies? Do they think we have nothing better to do with our time than worry about whether or not we're providing enough entertainment for them? Maybe we should outfit our boobs with a remote control and a joystick so they can play some kind of game with them from their gaming chair. Maybe if we had blinky pinball lights on our boobs then we could make them more fun for them. Whatever it takes...since surely our main goal is to please men and make sure they are having a good time.

Dude, would you like a beer with my boobs? Can I get you a sandwich and some Oreos to go with them? Is the lighting okay, or do you need it darker to withstand the sight of my not-quite-34D's? Whatever I can do for you, you just let me know, since I'm surely just here (on this Earth) to please you.


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May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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Vendetta
post Dec 16 2008, 07:34 PM
Post #2782


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 182


I agree with you maricat in some ways, it feels like they can't win ever. I've been there, I have over-analyzed every sentence about my breasts and got hurt. I won't do that again. I'll just accept that everyone has their preferences and I don't want to know which are them.
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MariCat187
post Dec 16 2008, 06:05 PM
Post #2783


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Posts: 5


About the "lukewarm responses" - Hmm... Forgive me if I seem to be in the minority about this subject, but I don't feel that they are "pity answers". I know honesty is the best thing, and that's great that your boyfriend can be really honest with you mynameislala, though know that must have hurt.... it would hurt me too! But maybe the men who say that they really don't prefer the bigger breasts really mean it? I would feel bad for the man - if he says he prefers bigger ones, the female gets hurt. If he says that he does like that the female has the smaller ones, the female gets hurt. It'd be like.... he can't win either way, lol.

If they are not the answers you want to hear, then what would you prefer (and the "you" isn't directed to one specific person, they're for everyone lol)?

Maybe I don't grasp the concept because I've been around males who honestly do prefer A-cups. I have a male friend who went out with someone with a C-cup, and that was even too big for him. My boyfriend tells me all the time how I have the "best boobs ever" (34A), and how he prefers A-cups as well..... And this is a guy who (when we were single) had a drunk and naked girl in his bed (who was like, a C/D-cup or something), and he DID NOT take advantage of it, and he slept on the couch.

Anyway, I would definitely understand and be hurt if my boyfriend was like, "I love C cups, but yours are good too." THAT would be a pity answer to me. But something like "I like small boobs!" and really meaning it? I don't think so.... :\

Am I making any sense, or am I just babbling? lol. sad.gif

::goes back to forum stalking::
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mynameislala
post Dec 16 2008, 03:55 PM
Post #2784


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Posts: 9


I get the thing bout "lukewarm" responses. I also hate how men always say those cliché phrases thinking they're somewhat saving our self esteems or something. I really wish they kept their mouths shut sometimes. Those are like pity answers... I can relate because it's always the same thing "Oh, but as long as it fits in my palm it's ENOUGH". Enough... like it's the minimum for it to be a good breast. Such fucking shit! I'm sorry but it just pisses me off, because then they are ogling the breasts in Maxim or whatever and they just say "oh, no, no, they're just so big it's impossible not to notice, it doesn't mean that I want you to look like that!". Yeah right.

My boyfriend has told me "I love your breasts, really they are hot, but I do prefer bigger ones". I appreciate honesty. Really. But I hate feeling like second best or something. I did make a male-like mistake once, though. I was younger, and we were just beginning to date. I was telling him a story that once I walked into my sister and her then boyfriend having sex. I hated that boyfriend of hers, he was so annoying, so I told him "Ugh, he was so ugly and I didn't like his personality, but at least he had SOMETHING to be proud about". I said that joking, not really thinking much. Yeah, he was big, but I would never want to be with someone too big (ouch). My boyfriend however, sometimes, will still get jealous if he remembers that. I've tried reassuring him that he pleases me a great deal as it is, and that too big is surely painful. I've also told him that the guy was really ugly and most of all ANNOYING as hell, which are huge turn offs. That my turn on are faces, mostly eyes, and my boyfriend has deep brown eyes with thick long lashes that I just love. I, however have never said something like "Oh honey, I LOVE your penis, but I prefer bigger". Nah, because he's the perfect size. I know this is cruel, but at least he has experienced the insecurity I've felt when he has made comments about big breasts or when he says something like "Your breasts are smaller, I wish they'd go back to when they were bigger".

But maybe he doesn't really like big big breasts too much or maybe he doesn't really mind much, because thinking about it, most of his exes have small breasts. One of them is actually flat chested, and damn am I jealous. She has a gorgeous slim figure and an even more gorgeous face and smile. But anyway, the point is that maybe men just say things or don't really care.

Sometimes I really think that guys just have problems with semantics. They really just don't know how to pick the right words to what they mean. Maybe when they say "enough" they mean "they're hot and I wouldn't want them any other way". But then again, maybe I'm just optimistic.

Anyway, now I have other issues about my breasts that are more important than size. Yesterday I started feeling some pain in my lef breast when I touched it. It's kind of swollen I think, and I did feel a little hard something inside, though it doesn't feel like a lump, more like a fibrous flat patch of breast tissue. But still I'm scared as hell and I'm visiting the gyno ASAP. I'm too young and I'd be crushed if I never get to breastfeed.
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ailurophile
post Dec 16 2008, 02:00 PM
Post #2785


BUSTie
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Posts: 57


Just quickly b/c I'm at work....

Lightchested: Cute name by the way..... "Lukewarm" response. Good way to put it. Also, she must have changed your password. I cannot get into your profile.

I do feel that he is only accepting my boobs as part of the package. I am sure he would have preferred if they were at least of average size. My ex didn't even blink when he saw big breasts. Didn't phase him one bit. (Probably the only thing I miss about him, though.) Current bf notices big breasts and apparently is now comfortable enough to exclaim in my presence. I saw him "notice" a well-endowed girl in a bikini on our first date. We walked around beachshops and some women were still in swimsuit tops. Let's hope I stopped the "whoa-ing" early enough though. I will be heartbroken if he didn't understand that it hurts me and does it again.

Karatgrrl: The conversations we have are not really all that open. He is not the communicative type. It's like I have to force him to talk about it...like he ends up with no choice. As soon as I hear what I want to, I drop it. He was in a pretty bad marriage/divorce apparently, which we have not talked about. I found out through someone else. I talk about only some things that bother me. There are many other things I'd like to talk about but I don't want to be knitpicky. I know I can be and I don't want to ruin it. But the Whoa-ing thing had to come up and then it truly bothered me when he said they were "alright". If they are just alright, don't bother to touch them. You know??


--------------------
I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It's not. Mine had me trained in two days. ~Bill Dana

Sat Nam...
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karategrrl
post Dec 15 2008, 04:38 PM
Post #2786


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 714


QUOTE(lightchested @ Dec 15 2008, 06:52 PM) *
I "MAY" be a little sensitive on this issue (!!!!!) but I've just heard too many things throughout my life- comments directed at me, or just comments that I hear or read- or men's reactions that I view- that just don't give me a good feeling about even lukewarm comments towards my or any woman's small breasts (or small breasts in general).

To me, comments like "Small ones are okay", "As long as it has a nipple I'm happy", "Anything more than a mouthful is a waste", "Guys like all breasts, regardless of size", or even "I like small ones", said in a "wow! believe it or not!" tone of voice that denotes some kind of FAVOR that the man is doing for me, or suggests that he is some kind of one-off, bucking the system by claiming to like small ones, I feel like men are saying, "It's okay. I'll take small if small is the best you can come up with, but we both know I wish you had big ones." That kind of "reassurance" is NOT what I want to hear! Not at ALL!!!

You're NOT being sensitive. This is something I have always felt, and commented on here. I agree totally!

I will check out the plentyoffish posting, but have to do it from home, not work!
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lightchested
post Dec 15 2008, 02:05 PM
Post #2787


BUSTie
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Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


Okay, since I accidentally posted twice, like a numpty (a word I learned in England recently) I am going to let you girls in on something that has me absolutely blown away.

You are the only people I know who I can show this to, and who may perhaps share in my interest in the men's reactions.

Quick background:
A girl who I've never met hates me (she is on another support forum that I joined a while back). She seems to be psychotic, based on the things she's done to me (having never even met!) but this particular thing she did backfired on her, because I don't think I got the reactions that she had expected!!!

She posted a profile for me on a "hookup" board (I don't know what they're called?) and you would not believe the profile she posted.

BETTER!!! You would not believe the RESPONSES I'VE GOTTEN!!!!

words can't describe this
you have to check it out
it's all about 'flatboobs' (the name she gave me on this board)...you've gotta see it & the men's reactions (surely not what she'd expected!)

She set it up and pointed it towards my email address that she knew from another forum. As you will see, she is not the purest of hearts. But once you get beyond reading the profile, check out the messages "flatboobs" received. They keep pouring in and notifying my email address that she pointed this account towards!!

http://www.plentyoffish.com/inbox.aspx
the login name is: flatboobs
password: imabitch (notification of this was sent to my email account...)

Along the top of the site, after logging in, there are some options to click on. View the profile! It is unbelievable what she wrote.

The read "messages"

You just won't believe it. I can't. I simply cannot believe men are pouring in to meet "flatboobs"!!! Not just because of the flat, but because of how she described me in the profile. (and by the way, I'm not 44, I don't have gray hair, and I'm very thin!!! despite what she wrote)


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May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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lightchested
post Dec 15 2008, 01:52 PM
Post #2788


BUSTie
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Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


I know what Ailurophile means, as I'm sure we all must, about taking offense to comments like "all right" in reference to my or any other small boobs. Lukewarm responses like that always seem to indicate to me a "grudging acceptance of them", "despite" their obvious "shortcomings".

I "MAY" be a little sensitive on this issue (!!!!!) but I've just heard too many things throughout my life- comments directed at me, or just comments that I hear or read- or men's reactions that I view- that just don't give me a good feeling about even lukewarm comments towards my or any woman's small breasts (or small breasts in general).

To me, comments like "Small ones are okay", "As long as it has a nipple I'm happy", "Anything more than a mouthful is a waste", "Guys like all breasts, regardless of size", or even "I like small ones", said in a "wow! believe it or not!" tone of voice that denotes some kind of FAVOR that the man is doing for me, or suggests that he is some kind of one-off, bucking the system by claiming to like small ones, I feel like men are saying, "It's okay. I'll take small if small is the best you can come up with, but we both know I wish you had big ones." That kind of "reassurance" is NOT what I want to hear! Not at ALL!!!

If men can't fake some enthusiasm for my breasts, they are history. At least, that's the way I was when I was in the dating world! Now I've got this husband who has ignored my boobs for three years and suddenly wants to get involved with them. However, "involved", so far, means him encouraging me to get Macrolane (it's become almost a daily conversation since I last posted- him telling me all the reasons why I should, me saying why I shouldn't).

I keep telling him why it's not the "quick fix" that it appears- at least not for me!- due to the psychological gravity of it. That procedure bolsters the boobs, but then they die back down again between 6 and 18 months. Can you imagine if I "grew boobs" (and yes, I know I do have some now, thanks to a fellow poster who kindly reminded me smile.gif, so can you imagine if I grew my already-existent boobs, and then they were GONE one day when I woke up? To have that crutch, and then one day the crutch is GONE// To live in fear, wondering when they are going to go, and how they are going to look as they die down? (do they die down evenly??) and how they'll look afterward? (some women have reported a lumpiness with the Macrolane) And what would I have accomplished? To convince myself that my natural breasts are "wrong" and in need of synthetic enhancement?

It's just not as simple as it seems to him. I can feel that the Macrolane is not right for me. I need to accept my body as it is. Somehow.


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May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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lightchested
post Dec 15 2008, 01:46 PM
Post #2789


BUSTie
**
Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


I know what Ailurophile means, as I'm sure we all must, about taking offense to comments like "all right" in reference to my or any other small boobs. Lukewarm responses like that always seem to indicate to me a "grudging accpetance of them", despite their obvious "shortcomings".

I "MAY" be a little sensitive on this issue (!!!!!) but I've just heard too many things throughout my life- comments directed at me, or just comments that I hear or read- or men's reactions that I view- that just don't give me a good feeling about even lukewarm comments towards my or any woman's small breasts (or small breasts in general).

To me, comments like "small ones are okay", or "as long as it has a nipple I'm happy", "anything more than a mouthful is a waste", "guys like all breasts", or even "I like small ones", said in a "wow! believe it or not!" tone of voice that denotes some kind of FAVOR that the man is doing for me, or suggests that he is some kind of one-off, bucking the system by claiming to like small ones, I feel like men are saying, "It's okay. I'll take small if small is the best you can come up with, but we both know I wish you had big ones." Like Ailurophile, that is NOT what I want to hear! Not at ALL!!!

If men can't fake some enthusiasm for my breasts, they are history. Now I've got this husband who has ignored mine for three years and wants to get involved again. However, involved, so far to him, means encouraging me to get Macrolane (it's become almost a daily conversation since I last posted).

I keep telling him why it's not the "quick fix" that it appears- at least not for me!- due to the psychological gravity of it. That procedure bolsters them, them dies back down again between 6 and 18 months. Can you imagine if I "grew boobs" (and yes, I know I do have some now, thanks to a fellow poster who kindly reminded me) and then they were GONE one day when I woke up? To give me that crutch, and then one day the crutch is GONE// To live in fear, wondering when they are going to go, and how they are going to look as they die down? (do they die down evenly??)

It's just not as simple as it seems to him. I can feel that it's not right for me. I need to accept my body as it is.


--------------------
May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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Vendetta
post Dec 15 2008, 10:35 AM
Post #2790


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 182


Yes, I also think it is cheating. My ex didn't mind at all and we even had a thresome at one point (she was his friend and they had something going on together years ago: yes, that's how I trusted him) but the now close-to-be-ex does. We don't trust each other, at all.
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karategrrl
post Dec 15 2008, 09:41 AM
Post #2791


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 714


Ailurophile, the open conversation you and the bf are having is just great! It's really good to hear, thanks for sharing!

And no, you didn't ask me this, but yes, sex with somone of the same gender is still sex, so it is still cheating if one fools around with someone else--even of the same gender--when you're supposed to be exclusive with someone else.
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Vendetta
post Dec 15 2008, 08:06 AM
Post #2792


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 182


Well, that was an experience for her, not for me, I've been having girls for years. My relationship with him is dead.
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loonydaray
post Dec 14 2008, 11:32 PM
Post #2793


BUSTie
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Posts: 45


ailurophile: that's awesome! good boyfriend tongue.gif i'm happy for you hon, that sounds like a really good step for you. keep up that sexy confidence!
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ailurophile
post Dec 14 2008, 02:54 PM
Post #2794


BUSTie
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Posts: 57


Thanx so much, girls, for the support. I wasn't sure if I was overreacting because the way he said, "What's wrong with that?" (him Woa-ing those models) and me being the jealous type, I thought I might me. He is not the jealous type at all.

We got into a little discussion the other night because I was telling him about our new friend here whose husband wants to by her boobs for Christmas and in the middle of the conversation he had said, "Wha--they're alright" meaning my boobs. I thought about it over the next day until we were out last night. I don't want to be alright. I want to be like some of you whose bfs/husbands think your boobs are totally hot/sexy. I am really working on my confidence here and have come such a long way. So if he doesn't think they're hot, that would kill me. Sooooo, last night while out shopping, we got on the subject of his penis. So I said................."It's alright". He was like, "Huh?" I reminded him of our convo the night before and proceeded to explain. Then in a joking way I said, "You were supposed to say, 'Your tits are so hot and sexy, darling' ". He didn't say anything for a minute. I got scared. Then he got really close and said, "I looooove your tits baby. I love them." He hasn't even told me he loves me yet so that was big. I said "Now that's the right answer!" Then he asked me how I could even think that he doesn't like them because he is always playing with them. And he has more recently. So what he said the other night about them being "alright", maybe he meant small boobs in general are alright meaning no better than big boobs? Or just a misspeak? I don't know but I do feel better now. And with your feedback on the "Whoa-ing" big girls thing, I have something to say if it should happen again and I know I'm not being a prude or a jealous gf. So, thank you!

Vendetta: Is it not considered cheating if it is with someone of the same sex? That worries me. I am happy for you that you got to have the experience I know I wish I had just once but you do have a bf. Just my opinion...but that's for another talk show...or thread.


--------------------
I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It's not. Mine had me trained in two days. ~Bill Dana

Sat Nam...
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Vendetta
post Dec 11 2008, 12:51 PM
Post #2795


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 182


We got drunk last night at the inauguration of a photography exhibition that some of our class mates did and me and my class mate Marcia have been really close lately. She has been talking about how she wanted to taste being with a girl so... she pulled me into the bathroom and we did you-know-what. It was the first time I felt embarrassed with a girl for wearing padding since she was trying to reach my boob throughout all that and she couldn't. I dropped a nervous line about how she went exactly to where I had none and she laughed and said something like "me too" or "I understand" meaning she also had small boobs. I grabbed her perfect milky white B-cups underneath the unpadded bra and just thought christ, they are so beautiful, just the right everything

I guess It's just me and I guess I'll just rest in peace when I have my B-cups.

Me and the bf fought a bit about porn today, I guess it came because he doesn't let me use his computer so I assume it has something to do with downloading porn or something related so when I asked out if he still watches porn he responded positively. In the middle of the fight I just stopped and went out for a beer. When I got back I just said to him "I'll praise and remind the confident person I was and the beliefs I had before I met you, so I won't fight over this again in anyway. You do whatever you feel like doing, I just don't give a shit anymore."

On the moment I settle up my life with this wished and achieved new job, I'll be a happy single woman again. Cheers
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loonydaray
post Dec 11 2008, 09:00 AM
Post #2796


BUSTie
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Posts: 45


now don't get me wrong, if a girl like that jogged by and he checked her out i would still probably smack him. because that's just disrespectful honestly

but you're right the thing to have is confidence. big boobs won't give you confidence definitely. the big step for me (that this forum totally helped me come to smile.gif ) was realizing that i really do like my body it's just all the media and boob attention that makes me feel the need to change. but just reading some of the girl's stories here ended that need. what's most important is that you are happy with your own body. what i've gathered from guys, confidence is more sexy than any physical characteristic *shrugs*
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mynameislala
post Dec 10 2008, 07:12 PM
Post #2797


Newbie
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Posts: 9


QUOTE(loonydaray @ Dec 10 2008, 03:49 PM) *
but you know, maybe it wasn't the big boobs in that commercial that really made him excited, could've been their legs, or butt, or just the fact that boobs were being flaunted in general. doesn't necessarily mean he cares about the size of the boobs. just because seeing those chicks in the commercial, doesn't mean he wouldn't be 9999999999999x more excited to see you and your oh so sexy little boobs up on the screen. point is you should be his ultimate view of sexiness. sure, he's gonna think other chicks are sexy, he may think big boobs are sexy, may think boobs in general are sexy. but the way i look at a relationship is while he may think all this other stuff is sexy, as long as he thinks i'm the sexiest than it's okay. go ahead, let some chick walk by him and flaunt her big boobs, remember he's not with her. he chose to be with you and your small boobies. and he should think you're perfect, cuz, uhm. you are! small boobies are sexy too and if a guy can't appreciate that then forget him! anyway. that's just what i think smile.gif


WHOAHHHH!!!!!!

Your confidence makes me excited, lol. I aspire to have such a level of confidence one day. I'm still not in the stage where if some DD woman - wearing only a sports bra - jogged by him and he checked her out, I'd be confident enough to not let it get at me. It'd probably be in my mind forever!

But anyway, I think we'll all agree on this... I'd rather have huge amounts of confidence than having huge breasts. Confidence never fails, confidence is a winner. Big breasts, on the other hand... well, not. Sure, it'd be nice to have biggish breasts and be proud, but breasts don't make you confident.

I was checking out the galleries at 007b.com today and it made me feel better. Not to be mean, but from what I saw (a huge diversity too!), the smaller breasts had indeed better shape than some of the bigger ones. Just my opinion though.
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loonydaray
post Dec 10 2008, 01:49 PM
Post #2798


BUSTie
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Posts: 45


exactly, thanks karategrrl for helping me claryifing the men's stupidity thing. it's very true that the minds of men and women work completely differently. your bf probably doesn't realize he hurt you with his reaction.

if it happens again, i definitely think you should explain it to him. if he truly cares about you, he'll be more careful. the issue a lot of times definitely isn't that guys are trying to be mean, piggish, or spiteful, they just aren't used to either a. being with a girl who is vocal about that kind of respect and b. they simply can't understand how we work and aren't expecting the conclusions we draw from their small actions. guys do this too. it's very natural for us to read a lot more into another's actions than they mean by it.

but you know, maybe it wasn't the big boobs in that commercial that really made him excited, could've been their legs, or butt, or just the fact that boobs were being flaunted in general. doesn't necessarily mean he cares about the size of the boobs. just because seeing those chicks in the commercial, doesn't mean he wouldn't be 9999999999999x more excited to see you and your oh so sexy little boobs up on the screen. point is you should be his ultimate view of sexiness. sure, he's gonna think other chicks are sexy, he may think big boobs are sexy, may think boobs in general are sexy. but the way i look at a relationship is while he may think all this other stuff is sexy, as long as he thinks i'm the sexiest than it's okay. go ahead, let some chick walk by him and flaunt her big boobs, remember he's not with her. he chose to be with you and your small boobies. and he should think you're perfect, cuz, uhm. you are! small boobies are sexy too and if a guy can't appreciate that then forget him! anyway. that's just what i think smile.gif
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karategrrl
post Dec 10 2008, 01:11 PM
Post #2799


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 714


ailurophile, NO you were not overreacting, and personally I think it's great you told him what you did right at that moment instead of stewing.

I have been in similar situations with bf's only about, oh, 1,298 times. looneydaray's right--sometimes they are just stupid. Now, before anyone attacks me, let me clarify--men often just don't have a fricking clue. We've commented on this before here, so I won't reinvent the wheel, but honestly I think it's not they're trying to be mean or insensitive, it's just that they don't understand--it's that simple. (Of course, we could get into a long debate over what's worse--to be intentionally insensitive, or to be insensitive and completely unaware. The latter is what has driven me to want to stab myself in the eye with a dull metal object on many such occasions--trying to explain to a man the concept of what I see as a common courtesy or the most obvious thing in the world, and having him act like I'm makingit all up, or worse, I'm "just insecure.") Grrr... Where is that metal object? Just thinking about it makes me simmer...

(Side story: Someone I had just started dating had a similar reaction to a ballerina at a very high-class, high-profile NUTCRACKER BALLET performance in New York. I mean, we were sitting among filthy rich, upper-crusty folks in tuxedos, and he was acting like he was in a strip club. I wanted to crawl under my seat.)

Yay for you for setting him straight. Hell, it may have been the first time anyone ever spoke up.

Heh...next time you see a guy with a nice butt, or some billboard with men's underwear advertised, make a comment and see how he responds. (It may take awhile for this to happen, since men aren't sexualized in popular media the way wome are) . My guess is he wouldn't be too thrilled himself.)
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loonydaray
post Dec 10 2008, 12:06 PM
Post #2800


BUSTie
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Posts: 45


QUOTE(neurotic.nelly @ Dec 10 2008, 11:40 AM) *
your filter dropped and you questioned his attachment to his balls, and rightly so. ~nn


hahaha the way you phrased that was brilliant biggrin.gif
ailurophile, i don't think you overreacted at all. guys honestly are just stupid sometimes (okay a lot of times). some don't seem to connect the fact that excitement at big boobs make us feel out of place since we have small boobs
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