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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
dj-bizmonkey
post Oct 16 2007, 08:00 AM
Post #3821


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Posts: 431
From: the depths of my soul


it is me, *wink*. gotta get back to work now, promise to post something this evening....


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"To lose everything at the edge of such a glorious eternity is far sweeter than to win by plodding through a cautious, painless, and featureless life."
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karategrrl
post Oct 15 2007, 07:27 PM
Post #3822


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Hey DJ, I wonder if you would mind explaining your avatar photo? I've been wondering for awhile. Is that you in the jeans, you bootylicious babe? wink.gif

Knorl, that IS a great essay...and oh, how I can relate! I vaguely seem to remember a similar personal experience!

I agree with the general discussion of late...why can't we all just accept each others' bods?? I swear, one of my best life experiences was going through a long teacher training at a yoga center. One night, several of us from the group all ended up in the steamy jacuzzi, naked, and I remember looking around and being awed by the huge variety of bodies there were among us--heavy, thin, large-breasted, small-breasted, dark, light--and especially how freaking BEAUTIFUL we all were, each in our OWN way. I will never forget that.
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edie52
post Oct 7 2007, 07:43 PM
Post #3823


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Yeah, it used to bother me a lot that Calista Flockhart got criticized so much. I was a fan of Ally McBeal as a teenager (I related to her romantic idealism) and liked that she was so small-busted and thin, and was still referred to as beautiful in the context of the show. And I remember getting excited when I'd see red carpet shots of her, thinking "she looks like me!", only to read scathing criticisms of her body. It's one thing if she really did need help (I don't remember if that was the case, I do know that she was very thin, but I eat healthy big portions and am not *that* active and am still thin, if I were busy and stressed I know that pounds would just drop).

Portia de Rossi was another small-breasted lady on that show, and I remember her being referred to as an "exotic beauty." And I love her as Lindsay on Arrested Development.
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anna k
post Oct 7 2007, 05:23 PM
Post #3824


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QUOTE
i am not a skinny-mini by any means (nice assonance there) but i have alot of friends who are, and they are always getting bashed by other women and being accused of having eating disorders. it's ridiculous to me. it's your fucking genetics, and if there is one thing you can't fight, it's your DNA. i have no problem with skinny women. what i have a problem with is medium to larger sized women thinking they have to be the same size as some one who is naturally that way and then do very unnatural things in order to achieve that.


I hate that too, that thin women would be assumed to not eat or that they'll get fat later, like being thin is a youthful temporary thing, or some kind of hatred/jealousy towards thin women. I was thin as a kid, but developed early into a voluptuous figure, and won't ever be wiry or really slim. And I'm fine with it. My genetics did seem funny since my mother and my grandma are both thin women, but it really is a combination of genetics and health. I watched a TV special on Heather Locklear where her castmates said she loved eating junk food, but was naturally thin and athletic (her SoCal upbringing may have added to that). I never understood the public criticism of Calista Flockhart, who looked like a naturally small-boned, thin woman. I saw her at a performance of The Vagina Monologues and thought that she looked fine.

My sister and I are on opposite sides of breast size. She is an A cup, while I'm a triple-D. It's ridiculous how even with the same parents, our breasts are really different.

I like it when women in movies display small breasts in an assertive, sexy way. Linda Fiorentino in The Last Seduction is a great example. Or watching Famke Jaansen in Rounders. I don't feel jealousy, I just admire them. Hell, just flip through British Vogue for vintage pics of Jane Birkin and Charlotte Rampling or recent photos of Kate Moss and Sienna Miller.

I don't mind changing in front of other women. I took ballet for several months, and the class was a beginner's full of people of varied ages and experiences, and I liked the female communal feel in the changing room between thin muscular girls who have done ballet for years, old women who did it as a pastime, and curvier women. We were all feeling good and refreshed after an hour of dancing, and it felt nice for me to be around other women changing. I did like to sneak peeks at other women, because I like seeing different bodies.
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dj-bizmonkey
post Oct 5 2007, 10:36 AM
Post #3825


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hey all, haven't read the essay yet, though it is on my to do list. i should be studying for my human variation class right now, but i needed a little distraction from it all.

not to double derail, but i think the point that lotus and knorl made is actually really valid. even though our focus here is breasts, it connects to the broader ideas about body image and beauty. it's just plain reprehensible to be criticizing one another on the basis of our bodies (and i'm not trying to guilt you here karategrrl, i would want to bash everything about that bitch too). i am not a skinny-mini by any means (nice assonance there) but i have alot of friends who are, and they are always getting bashed by other women and being accused of having eating disorders. it's ridiculous to me. it's your fucking genetics, and if there is one thing you can't fight, it's your DNA. i have no problem with skinny women. what i have a problem with is medium to larger sized women thinking they have to be the same size as some one who is naturally that way and then do very unnatural things in order to achieve that.

ANYWAY, yes, i like the idea of a social aptitude test before entering a locker room. as in, 'you must be at least this self-realized to enter....' getting back to the whole body image idea, i think it must be equally difficult for overweight women to change at the gym as well, especially when you consider alot of the people who are changing around them. i empathize with those women so much, the ones who feel like they have to cower in the corner because they've got a mushroom top poking out over their jeans. i mean, at least they've made a positive choice in their lives to get healthy, and that's what it should be all about: achieving what is best for your body. like i said, you can't fight genetics, if you were born to be a bean pole your probably not going to end up looking like beyonce. and for me, my thighs have always touched, and i mean always, since i was 4 years old. that's not going to change, that's my anatomy. when it comes to our bodies, we should stress being HEALTHY and not unnaturally thin for our body type.

sorry for the off topic rant, but i do think it all interconnects.

i am thankful for this forum, as i have said many many times, but i can't say it enough.


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"To lose everything at the edge of such a glorious eternity is far sweeter than to win by plodding through a cautious, painless, and featureless life."
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crinoline
post Oct 4 2007, 11:09 AM
Post #3826


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Lotus- I LOVED that essay!!! Thank you for sharing it with us!

(((karategrrl))) - There should be some sort of social aptitude test people are forced to take before being allowed in a locker room. Geesh.


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knorl05
post Oct 3 2007, 10:00 PM
Post #3827


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sorry that post was a derail...

anyway.

karategrrl, that sounds uncomfortable too. it's amazing how people can be so unfamiliar with anyone or anything different from themselves.


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We adore chaos because we love to produce order.
- M.C. Escher
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Lotus0910
post Oct 3 2007, 09:12 PM
Post #3828


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Knorl~ This was at Summerotica at Severance gallery near Eastern Market.. cool place! Even cooler if you were there; what a small world tongue.gif

Ladies, let me just say again that I am so happy to have found this forum. What a great outlet for all of us who have, no doubt, all shared similar experiences. We rock! Oh and check out this awesome short story I stumbled upon recently. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did!


http://www.smileandactnice.com/life/person...albreast.1.html


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We must be the change we wish to see in the world. - Mahatma Gandhi
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karategrrl
post Oct 3 2007, 07:14 PM
Post #3829


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Lotus, how awesome!

DJ, I will check out that movie!

You know, you guys reminded me of a similar bad experience (though the person involved was not half as harsh as those other assaholics...). I was changing clothes after a particularly sweaty karate class many years ago. There was another woman in there who was visiting, and also changing at the same time. We were ripping down to the skin, putting on fresh undies & bras, that sort of thing, and I swear when I took off my bra she got a sudden look of shock/horror/pity on her face when she saw my chest, like "Ohmigod!"

Luckily she didn't say anything, but the shock was there. Funny thing is, though she had, like, medium-sized breasts, they were flopping all around and one was way bigger than the other. Not to knock anyone else's boobs, but I felt waay luckier to have mine.

Love you all.
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knorl05
post Oct 3 2007, 01:40 PM
Post #3830


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lotus: which show was it? i was probably there.. ; )
RIGHT ON! what you said. all of it, so true. i'm glad you had the balls to speak up. like you said people need to be put in check.. especially in an environment where people are encouraged to see the unique beauty and natural sexual appeal of the human form. i dont care how snobby this sounds, but that's why i hate non-artists or non-art-aficionados attending those events.. i mean on the one hand, i see it as an opportunity to open their minds, but on the other i see it as yet another chance for them to harshly judge or critique something they dont understand. it seems like at that moment with what you said, it was the former.


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We adore chaos because we love to produce order.
- M.C. Escher
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Lotus0910
post Oct 3 2007, 01:24 PM
Post #3831


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Dj-bizmonkey, what an awful experience! If that ever happens to you again you should stand right outside the stall and say clearly "You realize, I can hear you." Not exactly witty or scathing, just a blunt and forward statement to help them realize how ugly they're being. People need to be told when they're behaving in an ugly manner, otherwise they think that said behavior is perfectly acceptable.

I have another eye-opening experiance to share with y'all-

An aquaintance of mine is an erotic photographer. She took some shots of a good friend of mine a few months ago which were featured in an exhibition shortly thereafter. When walking through the exhibition, I was surprised o see how many smaller breasted women were portrayed. Even the large breasted women were natural. Surprisingly, I saw not one woman with fake breasts featured.
As I neared one photograph in particular I heard a comment made "That's a good shot, but I would rather see a little more meat, less bone." then another coment "Beautiful photograph, but hideous model. It's supposed to be artsy, I understand, but do they have to choose women who look like men?" Then my best friend says, "Gross! That woman is sickly looking!" The photograph in question was of a woman who has my EXACT body type. Had she had fake bolt-on breasts, I guarantee you the reaction would have been completely different. She woul have been called 'hot' or 'sexy' but her lack of overly abundant breast tissue (or silicone) had her being called 'gross' and 'sickly'.

I turned to my friend and said loudly and defiantly "I think she's beautiful. Considering the fact that this is what I look like naked, I have nothing negative to say. She's beautiful because she's natural and unwilling to conform."
Everyone in the immediate area immediately looked at the ground, or nodded in agreement. Rightfully so! This was an erotic art show! Meant to sexually liberate and highlight the immense differences in the human form. It just goes to show you that even at an event aimed at provoking ideas of non-conformism and body acceptance, people still choose to have a 'Hollywood' sence of what beauty is. Cosmo is not beauty!


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We must be the change we wish to see in the world. - Mahatma Gandhi
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dj-bizmonkey
post Oct 2 2007, 05:32 PM
Post #3832


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Posts: 431
From: the depths of my soul


(((((everyone))))), i cannot even tell you how much your responses have helped me. it's one thing to know these concepts in my heart of hearts, it's another thing entirely to have them reinforced by so many intelligent, outspoken, powerful women. THANK YOU! i am so thankful for the existence of this thread.

i wish i could have that little man follow me around wherever i went and if i ran into some bitches like the other day, he could lay some smack down.

why do women cut eachother down like this? what are they hoping to achieve? it boggles my mind, especially in light of the fact that there are so many women like all of you out there in the world.


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"To lose everything at the edge of such a glorious eternity is far sweeter than to win by plodding through a cautious, painless, and featureless life."
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edie52
post Oct 2 2007, 10:27 AM
Post #3833


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Ha, I just checked that youtube link that djbizmonkey posted and I kind of loved it. It's ridiculous yet it made me feel good, it's a funny little mantra that's still running through my head. But yeah, my breasts make those ladies' look big, if I saw any of them IRL I would think average, maybe small-ish, nice breasts, but anywho. I wouldn't say there's anything they "ain't got" (and I guess I shouldn't think that about myself, either). The part where the little guy beats up the implant enthusiast was pretty great.
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p_176
post Oct 2 2007, 07:34 AM
Post #3834


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djbizmonkey - i'm so sorry that happened to you!! next time, definitely embarrass the little bitches! (and, as someone who has a larger chest, i don't pity smaller boobed girls...that's just silly).
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edie52
post Oct 2 2007, 01:44 AM
Post #3835


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I didn't know about Linda Fiorentino. I just Google image searched her. She looks very cute, sexy, and confident. I mean, I think natural, bigger breasts can look great, but she definitely looks better than anyone with two fake orbs on their chests.

She's now added to my list of small-busted women who look great (along with my Mom and my boyfriend's Mom!).
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crinoline
post Oct 1 2007, 10:35 PM
Post #3836


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((((dj-bizmonkey))))

Sometimes people can really suck. How ridiculous and immature, is this middle school? In my experience, when girls say things like that it stems from their own low self-confidence. It's like if they put down everyone else around them, they feel better in comparison. Ick.

Anyway, you're awesome, and who cares what vapid little snots say anyway?


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knorl05
post Oct 1 2007, 09:48 PM
Post #3837


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From: detroit rock city


i <3 you dj biz!!!
i JUST read your post. i'm so sorry you had that experience.
but i'd first like to point out that you're way more brave than me when it comes to your body. i would love to be a completely liberated and strong female who accepts her body 100%.. but i dont. i'm working toward it, but i just dont. i wear bras all the time, especially IF changing in public. the only people who have seen me sans bras are beaus. i'm not even comfortable going braless around my girlfriends.. because well, girls can be rude. not that it's an issue, but yeah, the whole shock and pity thing that women with bigger boobs feel for women with smaller boobs. i just dont want to be confronted with it. even when females care about eachother, i still think (most of us?) feel the need to check eachother out.
anyway. what we say and how we interact with people is indicative of our character and our mentality. it is obvious these girls are way immature, manipulated by the media, and play into society's erroneous beliefs about a woman's body. so you should pity them.. feel sorry for them. they are the unfortunate ones. they are the ignorant ones. if they are THAT shallow as to judge a woman they dont even know and make a cruel conversation over it, it shows exactly where they are and where they are headed as women. so beneath you. not even worth your attention or time, i know you know that.
but i understand that it does hurt because well it's just uncalled for.. and the words they chose to create that conversation were, like i said, CRUEL. dumb heartless bitches.
take comfort in knowing they live a shallow life, with their shallow friends, and you only have to deal with them in generic and casual amounts. what you have going for you, your intelligence, heart, soul, talent, love of friends and family.. is so much more important than what two little girls have to say about you to fill their shallow time.
again i know you know this i just hope you let it set in. xoxoxoxo


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- M.C. Escher
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dj-bizmonkey
post Oct 1 2007, 08:04 PM
Post #3838


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thanks so much y'all! i knew that posting in here would make me feel better. i'm kind of embarassed to tell the story to any of my bigger breasted friends because i don't want those looks of pity, ya know? i'm contemplating telling my man, but i'm even kind of embarassed there, even though i know he loves my breasts. it's a funny coincidence, because he just sent me this youtube link. i think you might enjoy it even though a)i'm not crazy about 'shake what ya ain't got' b)one the girls looks like she has c-cups, but whatever, the heart is in the right place. here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2IB_1GuC7k

i hope y'all enjoy it, even just a little.

sigh. i'm still recovering. stupid cunts. i'm with you on dropping the c bomb edie. and what choadfaces those guys must have been to say that to you. ugh. i'm really glad you shared that story, even though it may have been painful for you. please know, it helped me feel alot better not to be the ony one accosted by complete strangers.

anarch, i LOVE the fake fruit analogy, i'm using that from now on. brilliant.

karategrrl, i'm the same way when i see women like that in movies, i cheer! i want to watch them over and over again. a great example, linda fiorentino in 'the last seduction.' i love that she's a small-breasted vixen that has every man wrapped up in her web. her breasts are some of the smallest i've ever seen on the silver screen and she's rockin' them. one of the only actresses that's probably the same size as me.

i wonder if those cunts knew i was in there.....whatever, i just hope i never have to face them again, and if i do, i'm going to strut, chest out, head high. fuck 'em.

thanks again ladies, i'm so glad we've got eachother. i appreciate the support and the hugs.


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"To lose everything at the edge of such a glorious eternity is far sweeter than to win by plodding through a cautious, painless, and featureless life."
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anarch
post Oct 1 2007, 07:09 PM
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(((dj)))

(((edie)))

I enjoy knowing that trite, superficial girls and guys like that will end up with the partners they deserve, as artificial on the outside as they are hollow on the inside. Like...like....plastic display fruit. Looks fabulous, tastes like blech. They'll end up wondering why their "friends" backstab them, their partners cheat on them and their kids hate them. Guess what honey...it's because the way you measure and judge people is fucked up, and the way you treat people is fucked up, and you're getting exactly what's coming to you.

Hell with them, and all the other sheep like them.
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karategrrl
post Oct 1 2007, 07:05 PM
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Aw, dj-biz, that SUX!!! I'm so sorry that happened, and I really admire you putting your vulnerability out there. You know, it just goes to prove, these very young girls are just the ones who are brainwashed by all this "barbie doll-breasts" ideal. Honestly, girls their age don't see many normal (small) breasts anymore, so of course they are going to think it is unusual. All the more reason why we have to stand firm and proud (and perky) and show how beautiful we are, just as we are. If we don't, who will?

I was watching an old James Bond flick from the '70s last night with the hubby--Live and Let Die. The cutest girl in the movie was this adorable black chick with small breasts. She appeared in a teeny bikini and I said, "Wow! Normal breasts!!!" I mean, you just don't see that too much in the movies anymore.

Still, no doubt that was a sucky thing to experience. Massive hugs to you and your cute, wonderful, fab and sexy boobies! I'm sure you looked HOT!

Of course, there is also the possibility that perhaps they knew you were in there and were deliberately being bitches. Do you think that may have been the case?

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