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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
Aithinne
post Dec 1 2009, 08:58 PM
Post #1601


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Posts: 211
From: USA


Holy cow girls!! I go away for a few days, and you all spew your lovely selves all over the board! Lol...

As far as the questions, I think I've managed to scrape by in my teenage years by not caring (for the most part) what other people thought of me. And thank goodness too. I could have been completely destroyed and empty inside if I'd been any less stubborn about letting teenage stupidity get the better of me. Thankfully I kept it in my mind that high school is a very insignificantly short period of time, and that life would go on after it. Of course, I was sad that the boys then and the men now weren't and aren't so much into me, but I'm starting to realize that I don't give myself or men enough credit. I was being weirdly self-preserving for the constant rejection that I dumbly thought I'd always get. How sad. People noticing confidence is not a bunch of BS, even though you secretly roll your eyes at the statement during a self-esteem slump. Luckily I'm starting to get myself on my side, instead of feeling like I've got some split personality with one eating away at the poor little other.

The posture thing is something I'm starting to downslide on. I played violin for 6 years until college, and it definitely has made me get in the habit of sitting up straight. But I'm starting to slack off on my posture, and I can tell because my back hurts sometimes when I sit a certain way with bad posture for too long. One thing that I still have good posture for is when I'm driving in my car. For some reason, I don't feel comfortable when I'm driving (or even as a passenger) unless I'm sitting with the seat straight. I don't know how people can lean the seat back and drive at the same time. But then again, I am super short and seeing over the steering wheel is another problem.
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angie_21
post Dec 1 2009, 07:53 PM
Post #1602


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


Wow, again I'm away for a few days and look what happens, I can't keep up! As far as posture goes, I find getting up and walking around almost always helps, anything to get away from the damn computer screen!

As for realizing I was going to stay small, that took a long time. It just never made sense, because a lot of the women in my family are larger, and because I've had wide hips since I was 12 years old, I always thought my boobs would have to grow to match them eventually (I'm still 35-31-43, dammit!). It wasn't until near the end of high school that I had to accept it was never going to happen. I went through an angry phase, partly because I felt I'd never be as attractive as the other girls, and partly because I'd wasted all that time thinking, "when my boobs get bigger, then I'll have the confidence to ask boys out" when I could have been just learning to live with it. But once I realized that was the way things were, I learned to accept it. I haven't had people comment on my size since high school, either. Maybe it's because I'm very careful to dress in clothing that emphasizes my waistline and hips smile.gif

Spot-on, my boobs never grew with birth control either, not one bit! which makes me imagine that none of that fenugreek and other herbal stuff would ever work on me. I tried it for a few months when I was younger with no effect, but I'll admit I was pretty half-assed about it. I stopped when the herbs started giving me dizzy spells. That was enough to convince me it was a bad idea even if it had been working.

Buttercups, that's a pretty amazing amount of shit you've somehow managed to encounter in one lifetime! I don't even know what to say. Maybe it's something to do with regional culture variations, maybe you live in some kind of asshole black hole in America? I can't believe people can be so disgusting. I also have always had a boyfriend, and always had relatively stable, communicative relationships. I do think that having a small chest makes us a bit more open and a bit less likely to rely on our looks to carry us through life, including with our relationships. I also think that given how tiny you are, you were getting more jealousy from other girls than I ever did, which is always expressed through insults for some reason. Boys on the other hand, are just immature and somehow think they have the right to comment on our bodies, no matter how ugly or out of shape they may be. It's a dumb world, but if you avoid the idiots, things are a LOT easier.
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spot-on
post Dec 1 2009, 07:38 PM
Post #1603


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From: California


buttercups, wow you really have had some comments from some asshole people huh? No-one is perfect, even movie stars and models have some issue about them that they'd change (and do) so screw them! I haven't had guys make comments on my small boobs but I have had women comment, And WTF is it with family that think it's ok to comment on boobs? Seriously? Rock on with your small boobied self, you sound awesome rock the small boobies and screw what the world thinks!

Yep posture can improve how the breasts look, shoulders back and down, abs contracted both make boobs look visually bigger but that's mostly noticable when naked smile.gif It does have an effect when clothed but mostly because when our posture is good we appear more confident and relaxed in our own bodies and therefore more atttractive I think.


QUOTE(buttercups @ Dec 1 2009, 03:48 PM) *
As far as posture goes, I think I have decent posture but I've never done any exercises, so I would be interested in that too. I've always heard about how posture can improve the way your breasts look, but I just dont think its done much for mine haha. Let me know how that goes.

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buttercups
post Dec 1 2009, 06:48 PM
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Just wanted to get my answers in to these questions. I think I can def relate to what you said nbdx0645 in that I was constantly finding myself asking the question "am I normal" or not- and in many ways I still am. My sister is petite too but she has DDs (au natural) and my mom is a full B cup, so I really don't know where I got my small chest from. Growing up, I never thought I'd stay a AA bc no one in my family is this small. I always figured I too would be a "late bloomer" and I remember I used to tell myself that if I would just stop looking down at my chest and looking at my breasts then they would just miraculously grow and then one day I would just notice them there. Well...10 years or so later...they're still the same. I can def relate to what people said about feeling like they were missing out on some shared female experience, I've felt that way for as long as I can remember. I think I was just perfectly fine and happy with myself until around age 14 when I went to high school and people started making comments. Honestly, I never noticed my breasts (or lack thereof) until other people did. My friends used to say that if we were a sandwich then I would be the cheese bc I was so flat. I've had girls ask me if I shop for bras at Baby Gap and make other rude comments in front of others. I've had guys tell me that they "think" there are guys out there who like girls like me, but that "they don't know of any". I've had a guy at work unbutton my shirt (yes completely inappropriate but I was only 16 or 17 and didn't think to do anything about it) and point out to everyone how there was nothing there. I've had my uncle refer to my chest as "mosquito bites" in the middle of thanksgiving dinner with the entire family, I've had boys comment about my chest in college in the middle of the cafeteria, I've had a boy talk about how flat I was to another girl in Chinese in front of me and they just looked at me and laughed and later on he told me what they had said, and I've had countless other situations occur. Before any of these things, I was happy with myself, and I think that's what makes me the most sad, that I can remember being happy with myself and then I can remember everything falling apart with people commenting more and more. If everyone kept their damn mouths shut, I think I wouldn't have turned out this way at all. But yeah I'd say it all started at 14 and went downhill from there. On a side note, I've always had a bf and never really seemed to have a problem getting one (though I've worn padded bras for years so they didn't know what they were getting into I guess). But despite the padded bras I've never had a bf really say anything negative to me when he saw my real chest (as nerve-wracking as that's always been) and I always manage to have better relationships than most of the girls I know. I've never been broken up with (not bragging here just maybe trying to point out that there is love for smallies) and anyone I've broken up with has always wanted me back to this day. I don't think I'm anything special and I honestly don't find myself attractive in any way, but there must be something these guys like. My current bf says he loves my body and as much as I can't believe him, he doesn't seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. So I don't know I was always told how ugly I was, but I managed to have better relationships than most of the people who swore no one would ever love this body.

As far as posture goes, I think I have decent posture but I've never done any exercises, so I would be interested in that too. I've always heard about how posture can improve the way your breasts look, but I just dont think its done much for mine haha. Let me know how that goes.
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spot-on
post Dec 1 2009, 03:22 PM
Post #1605


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lux I'm from England and I agree I think boobs weren't such a big issue back there, not like here in plasticland USA. In England I didn't feel any pressure to have bigger boobs, they were small and I was "normal". Here it's like "hey, there are implants why are you not getting them" or at least thats how it seems. But I just cannot do it. Like Karategrrl said they look half grapefruits bolted on, plus I hate that big gap between them too. They look obviously fake. And when you don't have much to begin with they'll look worse from what I've seen. I've only ever seen a few good boobs jobs IRL, most are just joke looking obviously fake.

If your EX told you your boobs were too small then good riddance I say! If you can't appreciate what you have then you don't deserve it. I've considered implants a lot over the last few years living in plasticland, but like you said it wouldn't solve anything and the health issues and maintenance with it scares me bigtime. I'd rather stay small.

I don't plan on getting pregnant and therefore not breastfeeding so I don't see mine changing anytime soon. Unless they come out with some miraculous new drug that is side effect free and increases the boobs naturally. Amazing that they had a pill to give men errections but nothing to increase boob size without undergoing the knife!

Karategrrl, nope boob enhancing isn't new. Even corsets were boob enhancing as they were underwired and pushed boobs up. It's nothing new, women have been squeezing in and out of constricting clothing for some time it's all for fashion and body trends. Hoping the smallie trend comes back soon. I did see a report a few months ago that said Boob jobs were down on previous years, whether that's accurate I don't know. Prob cos so many already have it done, and the economy, but I can hope it's a swing back to "au natural". All men I know say natural is best, so why are women doing this to themselves?
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karategrrl
post Dec 1 2009, 01:08 PM
Post #1606


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Okay, I just HAD to share this. My coworkers and I got into a conversation over lunch about "foundation garments" (girdles and the like) that women used to have to endure wearing. See this link and scroll down to the photo of the four seated women. The one on the left is inflating her bra with a straw. I guess bras enhanced with air, water and padding aren't a new thing at all!
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lux
post Dec 1 2009, 12:46 PM
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de-lurks
I didn't get really uncomfortable with my size before i was in my 20's. I developed early, and got my period at 10 and my breast were about their full size before i was 12. Not fun at all, so i was kind of happy they stayed small at that point. No one ever really noticed them at that point, probably because i was kind of tall and looked older than my age. I also don't remember there being that much focus on boobs in school. It might be a cultural difference, since i'm from northern europe. And i've seen my mom naked enough times to know what to expect. We are still the same size. But i have to say that also small breast are affected by time and breastfeeding:) Then again why should you have teenage breasts on a middle aged body?

Until i was about 15-16 i didn't really think about my breasts. But then suddenly all of my friends started talking about how guys only talked to breasts and about getting rude comments on the streets and so on. Sad as it is when i think about it now, i felt so left out. I felt like i was missing on some common female experience and i was lacking something everyone else had. Sad, but that's how my teenage brain worked smile.gif. Then i got passed the worst years of terrible self-esteem, and what bothered me most was that clothes didn't fit me or i couldn't find a bra in my size. I'm still sometimes irritated by that, but i am A and not an AA now, so it's easier. I've never really been into the padded bra thing, and often went braless before, because most bras were so uncomfortable. To be able to find a small enough cup size i would need to go down to a band size that was too small and uncomfortable, since i'm not petite.

The biggest blow to mu boob-esteem was when my ex blatantly told me that i was un-attractive because my breasts were too small. On top of having lots of other problems with her, this really hurt me and my still not so great self-esteem. It got me thinking about implants and what not. I basically blamed all of our problems on my boobs, very clever. It's better now, and i'm getting happier with my body. I still sometimes think about implants, but not seriously, because i know it wouldn't fix my problems, and i would probably just get a bunch of health problems on top of it. And it's not like i have the money for it smile.gif

On posture: as i grew tall at an early age, i was also uncomfortable with my height, so i have problems with my posture. I'm glad my boyfriends is worse! On those periods i've taken ballet classes and other dance classes, my posture has been much better. I don't mean 15 hours a week dancing, but a couple of times a week as exercise. Basically any kind of exercise that where there is focus on the core, pilates, dance, yoga should help. But strenghtening the upper back sounds good too. I should do that again, and hopefully get rid of some of my head aches. I'm a student, and i sit a lot in front of the computer. I also sometimes try to focus on my posture, all the way from the pelvis to the top of my head, when i'm standing in a check out line, on a buss stop and so on. I'm hoping it will make my brain and body more used to it. Hasn't done the trick yet but i'm optimistic about it!
re-lurks
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karategrrl
post Dec 1 2009, 09:02 AM
Post #1608


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KeraBear, I'm so glad you found this place. Be my little sister?? <<hug>>

To answer your question, it had to be about in 6th grade when I really became aware of the breast issue. One girl in my class had BREASTS. I remember one boy complaining, "All the girls in this class are flat-chested." (I guess he forgot the busty girl in that moment of dumb-assedness. But I digress...)

I got my period during that year but managed to fly under the radar, so to speak, b/c of being small chested, which was good--I was totally a tomboy, not comfortable with my body, and could not have handled any extra male attention. (Might I comment here how sick it is that teens and men in their 20's were being total pervs to me during this time??!! Must have had that Lolita look or something. Ew.)

Things really got noticeable in junior high, when suddenly it seems just about everyone around me was busting out (pun intended). A definite low point was being at a party and the "cool" girls were comparing boob size. I lost my guy-crush that evening to the girl with the biggest.

I'm 40 now, so that was in the early 80's. Breast implants were very, very new and it was, like, celebrities that got them--not your soccer-mom next-door neighbor, like it is today. So I never considered that until much, much later, which is fortunate, b/c in my mid-20's I started really blossoming, getting athletic and body-comfy, loving the bod for what it could do rather than how it looked, though I did get some awesome compliments. It's only gotten better and better since then. Which is not to say I don't always notice my small chest when I look in the mirror, but lately I look at my boobs, kind of look at them as part of the whole body, and say, "Okay, I guess I look pretty good." So I've considered implants, but after about 5 minutes of looking at melon-half/bolt-on "after" photos and photos of implants gone awry, I concluded that I like my own much better than anything I could buy, thank you very much.

I was a kid in the 70's, during the time strongirl described, and I remember the braless/polyester peasant blouse look. wink.gif I just missed the boat, though, b/c when puberty hit, it was the beginning of the plastic surgery craze we now know. <sigh.>


I totally second spot-on's comments about posture. Also, maybe just reminders during the day--set your iPhone to beep or whatever--to increase self-awareness. I look SO MUCH better with good posture and have told folks to TELL ME if they see me slouching!!! Thanks for the reminder!!

Geej, I have rambled!! sorry!
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KeraBear
post Dec 1 2009, 08:39 AM
Post #1609


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QUOTE(strongirl @ Nov 30 2009, 03:17 PM) *
It wasn't really like that when I was your age (in the 1970's). Being thin was the ideal and going braless was the fashion, so as a slender girl with small, pert breasts I thought I was quite lucky!


Dag yo... i totally grew up in the wrong decade... that must've been pretty sweet. wink.gif

QUOTE(nbdx0645 @ Nov 30 2009, 09:32 PM) *
I also wished I got the attention girls with breasts had. It's similar to that feeling when you're a kid, and all the other girls are being chased -- but you aren't. Aww.


I hear that. For the longest time, guys treated me like their little sister. SOOOO annoying. Thank GOd for my growth spurt!
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spot-on
post Nov 30 2009, 10:09 PM
Post #1610


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From: California


I'm beginning to think I'm the only person who didn't get bigger boobs when they went on BC! Lol! I've been on a few different types and not one has changed my boob size!

Which BE product did you use? An online friend of mine has reported good things about fenugreek supplements. I may try it I dunno. Has anyone else tried any natural breast enhancement products?


QUOTE(nbdx0645 @ Nov 30 2009, 06:32 PM) *
I think I'm secretly hoping that when I go back on BC they'll change. I also tried a bust-enlargement program. The swelling was temporary, and after one month my breasts didn't fit my bras...the bras were too big. Maybe I lost weight? I don't know. I stopped the regimen. I still have a bunch of pills in my closet. The bras I ordered from Urban Outfitters (the triangle-style ones) were too big. I'm not surprised. I'm tired of letting all these memories bother me.

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spot-on
post Nov 30 2009, 10:05 PM
Post #1611


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From: California


Kera, basically I ditto everything Strongirl said. Boob size was never an issue for me until about 10 years ago, I was happier then. Then implants became the 'norm' for smallies to switch to and I got left behind in the a/b cups. I started my period around age 11 (yeah so not fun!) and my boobs started to grow around age 12/13 and promptly stopped a year later. There were plenty of small busted girls in my school, probably the opposite of todays schools I think. The bigger boobed gals got picked out in our day because they were the oddballs. I knew at age 14/15 that my boobs were done and I wasn't gonna take after my Mom. And after seeing her naked I was kinda glad, forever small, forever pert! My Moms are big but dayum they are around her midriff!!! No offense to the bigger endowed gals but sure I'd like mine a little bigger but not so big that they sink around my navel! My Mom takes after my Gran who is also well endowed and also has saggy boobs. I hindsight things could be worse, no way I could do my job with boobs like my Mom!

Strongirl- Posture: hey I'm a personal trainer, if you want posture exercises I'm your gal! Computers have been pretty bad for lots of peoples postures, my husband works in front of a computer all day so I see it first hand. Corsets won't help. There was a 'band' that fit around both shoulders but that wasn't proven much use either. I tried one of those kneeling chairs and though it did improve my posture whilst at the computer my knees felt the brunt of that but I do have bad knees. I tried the balance balls too for sitting at the computer and that just gave me back ache.

Basically you need to do exercises that stretch the pectorals and anterior deltoids, plus exercises to strengthen the lats, rhomboids, posterior deltoids (basically upper back). To strengthen the upper back try bent over flys, lat pull down & seated row. (google for exercise explanations) Yoga will definitely help so if you can incorporate that into your routine then great!
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nbdx0645
post Nov 30 2009, 09:32 PM
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Good questions. I'll start with Kera's. I started to worry a bit around 6th grade, I'd say. My mom told my she was a late bloomer and developed breasts in high school (blatant lie) so I wasn't too worried. I pretended that I had my period since I was 13 to fit in with other girls. I got my period on tax day (lolz) when I was almost 15. I was done growing boobs shortly after my period started, I think. I didn't like to look down at them so I'm not totally sure of their size then, compared to now. I was really worried and self-conscious in high school. It seemed like breasts was a requirement to be popular in school. In retrospect, that wasn't the case, but it felt like it :/ I wore a lot of padded bras, swimsuits, and I always wore my push-up bra underneath my sports bra, until my senior year. I found a padded sports bra so I used those, instead. I didn't get teased as much as I could have, since I wore padded bras and I avoided low-cut shirts. I also wished I got the attention girls with breasts had. It's similar to that feeling when you're a kid, and all the other girls are being chased -- but you aren't. Aww.

There was definitely that "am I normal?" thing going on for me, since my mom wasn't a big help and my sister was too shy to talk about her small breasts until she was much older. I don't remember much of junior high, I hated it. Now, at 25, I'm getting used to being much smaller than most people. I think I'm secretly hoping that when I go back on BC they'll change. I also tried a bust-enlargement program. The swelling was temporary, and after one month my breasts didn't fit my bras...the bras were too big. Maybe I lost weight? I don't know. I stopped the regimen. I still have a bunch of pills in my closet. The bras I ordered from Urban Outfitters (the triangle-style ones) were too big. I'm not surprised. I'm tired of letting all these memories bother me.

As for posture, I'd be interested in what others say. My posture blows.
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strongirl
post Nov 30 2009, 03:23 PM
Post #1613


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So now it's my turn for a question to all of you.

Has anyone dealt with having bad posture and been successful at improving it? If so, what did you do to make it better? I want specifics - specific exercises, or techniques, or gadgets (a corset?), etc. I need to do something.

My posture sucks, mostly due to the fact that I've spent most of my waking hours working on a computer for the past 3 decades. I think not only my breasts but my whole body would look better if I could improve it in a lasting manner, plus I'm worried it's going to become more of a health problem as I age. The best its ever been was when I did yoga and maybe I should just get back into that but I'm interested in all and any suggestions.

Thanks in advance!
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strongirl
post Nov 30 2009, 03:17 PM
Post #1614


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Hi Kera - It's funny, I didn't have any negative feelings about my small breasts until I was much older and big boobs and implants became so much more the "market standard" of what it means to be attractive. It wasn't really like that when I was your age (in the 1970's). Being thin was the ideal and going braless was the fashion, so as a slender girl with small, pert breasts I thought I was quite lucky!

The only time I ever really felt dissatisfied was about 10 years ago when the big boob thing really started to reach absurd levels and it warped my head along with everyone else's standards. At that time I started thinking about implants...but when I did the research and started seeing "before and after" pics, I found that I liked the "befores" better! Then I learned about all the complications and problems that can happen (including the fact that about 1/3 of all women with implants had to have a repeat or corrective surgery within 3 years) and I went, uh, no thanks.

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KeraBear
post Nov 30 2009, 01:54 PM
Post #1615


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Here's a question. About what stage in your life did you all become "aware" that you were gonna end up smaller than your peers? And when did it start to "bother" you? I was looking at old yearbook photos, which got me thinking about all this. Sooo many good memories of elementary school, but junior high was just the worst. Probably because while all the other girls started getting boobs, all i could manage was two puffy nipples. It wasn't until the summer between 8th and 9th that somebody could look at me (with clothes on) and say, "hey, little Kera is starting to get breasts". btw that happened to me at a family reunion. rolleyes.gif I've always had a bit of a complex about being seen as my age (now 17) and not a little girl. Certainly not helped by not getting my first period until i was 15. And the endless teasing from classmates about my booblets and being short. The problem was that for the longest time i associated having a chest and periods with being a woman. But i've come to the conclusion that being a woman is far more that just boobs and blood, it's a mentality. After all, i know 11-year-olds with both and i know i am way more woman than they are! So.... yeah... it's been a rough go for lil Kera since junior high. High school has gotten better for me since i've reached this realization. I just wish I could go have a time machine so that I could go back and talk some sense into junior high Kera. Gotta keep rocking these booblets with all i've got! Anyways, just thought I would share. You ladies have been AWESOME for me. Thanks.
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spot-on
post Nov 29 2009, 02:22 PM
Post #1616


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From: California


Hi busties!
Back from a great vacation over thanksgiving, now cleaning and doing laundry and all that crap lol. Had a great time, didn't think about boobs hardly at all over the trip except where I was freezing my ass off in the morning and decided not to remove my t-shirt to put a bra on and went out to walk the dogs braless smile.gif Sure I had on a t-shirt, sweater and coat but hey the intention is there! Hope you all had a great thanksgiving!

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buttercups
post Nov 26 2009, 09:08 AM
Post #1617


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I second what Aithinne said, I am so thankful for all of you! Happy Thanksgiving!!
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Aithinne
post Nov 25 2009, 06:22 PM
Post #1618


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I just wanted to wish everyone an early happy Thanksgiving, because I probably won't get around to getting online tomorrow.

I am certainly grateful for this haven of amazing women, and thank you all for being awesome!
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karategrrl
post Nov 24 2009, 07:07 PM
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QUOTE(nbdx0645 @ Nov 24 2009, 01:09 AM) *
As for the wrath of moms, I go out of my way to make myself ooze confidence. When I see her, I wear my bralette with a pretty shirt. Then, I turn up the charm and the smiles. She'll stare at my chest the entire time, and make some well-meaning compliments/advice, and I don't listen to her at all. No acknowledgement,no back-talk, nothing. She says what she wants to say and goes "you know?" "...you know?" "....I'm just trying to help, you know?" And I'll just smile. When she changes the topic, that's when I start talking again. It's my way of standing firm about my decision to refuse implants. I refuse to let her see me sad. Because if she sees me sad she says she'll call up her old doctor and pay for my consultation, or some other BS. What helps me out the most is to flash my well-endowed smile. But it can be hard sometimes, to see such disapproval. It's the only way I can get her to STFU.

Grrl, I am so in awe of you. You are handling an exceptionally difficult situation with grace, strength and self-respect. Not to mention, I know there are lots of moms out there whose daughters want implants but they're (the moms) trying to do everything they can to discourage it. Most of the TV shows I've seen where girls get implants have shown the moms trying to talk them out of it. Not to diss your mom, but WTF!!!????

And sheet yeah, I wish we could all meet, like a smallie convention or something. Now that would be totally freaking awesome.

And one more random thought--I was totally getting off on the sight of my husband's mouth on my breast the other night. Good feeling.
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angie_21
post Nov 23 2009, 10:52 PM
Post #1620


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From: Alberta


I agree, everyone here rocks wub.gif wish I could meet y'all in person, I'd love to buy you all a beer lol It's nice to be able to talk with so many girls who are supportive and fun, and smart too.

strongirl, do you have a link to that study? It doesn't make sense to me. I mean, I always thought that people responded to photos (of anything) differently than they responded to things in real life, so of course men would respond similarly to a photo of a woman as they would to a photo of whatever else, especially if it's a photo of a stranger. I also agree with your boyfriend's point. Men are subjected to advertising with women in skimpy outfits 24/7, and just because they may automatically respond a certain way to a photo of a woman in a sexual pose and semi-sexual outfit, doesn't mean they respond the same way to real women, in real life. Did they test how women react to photos of shirtless male models in tight jeans? Studies like that not only sell men short, they also give men an excuse to act stupid and treat women badly, so I hate it when scientists and the media sensationalize their work just to make it sexier or more controversial. spot-on, female chimps are just as promiscuous as male chimps, so the biological idea doesn't work... men have no excuse! or maybe women should just have more fun!
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