[neurotic.nelly]

I was just looking at Angelina Jolie's photos, she's pregnant with twins n' all. Her breasts look great, she looks classy etc. I got to thinking about how Christina Aguilera's breasts looked in a close up picture - it was in techni-color, mind you. She has breast implants, right? In the picture, she was flaunting those implants even though it wasn't at all attractive IMO, they looked painfully swollen and veiny ( I have a thing about veins, no offense to anyone ). But, that's what you do, once you've bought and paid for them, you flaunt them, even if they look...terrible.

Lately, since reading here, I feel like an in-betweeny. I am a large A cup/ small B, so I have some breast tissue but not enough for an impress people with my cleavage. Its like I have the hint of cleavage, but I could never give my boy a tittie fuck.

I also feel that it is really important to surround yourself with positive images of women who look like you do, it boosts the self-esteem. Awhile back, I took a cartoony drawing of an Indian girl sitting in meditation with a-symmetrical small in-betweeny breasts like mine, and I posted it on my journal. It was really pretty.

[crinoline]

OT - DJ, thank you thank you for the tip about Intimissimi bras!! I went to victorias secret (yes, evil, I know) and they had a whole bin of size 1s on sale! I got a whole new bra wardrobe in pink, ivory, white, black, and blue. They are all lightly lined, so no show through, but no padding either, and half of them are pretty and lacey. The feature I was most impressed with, is that the band is completely adjustable, like a strap! This is great for me, because I need a 30 band, which is impossible to find. So now I have delicate, grown-up lingerie, and I can throw out my carebear print preteen bras! hooray!!

As for implants, I agree with your reasons, stronggirl, but I would add that it is very likely a daughter of mine would be built the same, and I would not want to have her feel that she is in any way less. I think that if I got implants, it would send the message that I wasn't good enough before, and thus she is not good enough. It would set a bad example, and be damaging psychologically.
(also, it's adorable that your lover said that)

As a psychology major, I would also think that anyone seriously considering breast implants should definitely go through therapy first to examine their true reasons for doing this to themselves. The level of self-doubt needed to undergo major surgery of this nature should really be explored and worked through. I think that for many women, getting breast implants is just an unhealthy way of dealing with the symptoms of a much larger problem.

(((all breasty busties)))

[karategrrl]

Hey strongirl,

Your list of reasons not to personally get implants echoes my own. I'm sorry if I offended anyone by agreeing with DJ's comment about not being able to relate to anyone on a deep level with someone who does get them. I defend my viewpoint and right to feel that way, but I must admit I've never personally known anyone who got them who was a down-to-earth person who I could relate to on a deep level, and I guess my lack of personal experience does skew my perception.

And to further confuse you all, I will confess that yes, I've had my moments where I said, "fuck it all!" I'm gonna sell out and get it done and FINALLY know what it's like to buy WOMAN'S BRAS and have CLEAVAGE and blah blah blah." But I know that even if I got to the point where I was being wheeled into the operating room for implants, I'd probably have a moment of personal clarity and jump right off the stretcher and run shrieking. I guess a lot of that comes from working in a health care environment; yes, we are able to work medical miracles in this day and age of technology, but in my humble opinion, major surgery is best left for lifesaving or health-enhancing situations. I've just seen and heard of too many instances where things went wrong with surgery...when it's surgery that was necessary, that's bad enough, but when it wasn't necessary (and yes, I know "necessary" is a subjective term), it really gets to me.

And yes, I, too, like the size of the woman's breasts in the black and white photo in the online article. I'd give a lot to have those!

[anaisnin]

]
Recently my lover said that if I wanted to get implants, he would lie on the floor and have a huge temper tantrum, kicking his feet and pounding his fists. And if I tried to walk past him, he'd grab my ankles and try to keep me from going out the door.

your lover has a great sense of humor

[strongirl]

The article karategrrl shared by the man who's turned off by "enhancements" is mandatory reading for everyone who reads this forum. I have heard similar comments by other men (and women).

Recently my lover said that if I wanted to get implants, he would lie on the floor and have a huge temper tantrum, kicking his feet and pounding his fists. And if I tried to walk past him, he'd grab my ankles and try to keep me from going out the door.

I laughed but it did make me feel really good. It's nice to have a guy say "I love you the way you are". But for me the image of an anti-implant tantrum has a bit more visceral impact.

[strongirl]

I am glad that Vendetta is getting some support here. She's obviously gone through a lot and is a strong person who thinks deeply about things. Vendetta - whatever you decide, I wish you happiness and self-love!

"but i do know that those who go through with the procedure are not individuals that i can relate to on a deeper level"

This phrase by Knorl but echoed by others really bothered me. I can only think of 3 women I know who have gotten implants. One is the stereotypical superficial, competitive bitch. But the other two are kind and caring people, insightful thinkers, and wonderful mothers. I have benefitted from knowing them both and would have lost out had I drawn that kind of line. I don't have to agree with someone on every issue to be friends.

In making a stand for tolerance and support for other women, I certainly did not mean to promote "an implant-supportive shift" on this forum! I've researched, considered and consistently opted not to get them. Why not?

1) I try to care for for my body in a healthy, natural way and they go against that.
2) I'm not sure they'd be an improvement - for the most part, I've always liked my small tits and so have my lovers.
3) I don't wish to support the societal trend toward physical conformity and artificiality.
4) I've looked at a lot of the before/after pics and the vast majority of them strike me as ugly and gross.
5) The risk of losing sensation scares me - I can orgasm from nipple stimulation and don't want to lose that.
6) Capsular contraction - when I see the tell-tale ripples and puckers in porn flicks, it makes my pussy go dry. Yuck!
7) Repeat surgery every 5-10 years? That sucks!

All that being said, who am I to judge someone who says, "Yeah, but it'd be worth it!" It's a personal choice.

[strongirl]

Ah, motherhood - same here on the milk engorgement. Ouch!

It's funny, when I was pregnant and nursing, my breasts were the biggest they've ever been and they felt the least sexy to me. I felt like I had cow udders. They functioned extremely well but didn't seem sexual to me until close to weaning (when I did have a very hot experience letting my new lover nurse from me, which was fun and we still sometimes fantasize about it a decade later). But at that point they were back down to an A cup.

[honeybunch]

WOW. What moms go through! I remember, I used to wish they could replicate the milk production hormone so I could get injections of it and get larger breasts. Then I realized it's not that easy!

It's not easy. That stuff gets everywhere. Milk soaked thru several layers of clothes. So I'm sitting there in class and there's this beg wet spot on my jacket (this was before I had a chance to get some nursing pads). It shoots everywhere. I swear I could have fed 10 babies.

Oh and ladies, pregnancy and lactaction doesnt necessarily make boobs sag more either, although in a strange way I was hoping for a bit more sag. I'm still passing (or failing???) the pencil test.

[honeybunch]

Hey, ladies,

Some interesting articles:

http://www.glamour.com/health/implants/subindex

I like her size boobs. Those are like waaay smaller than what I was loll.

*ducks tomatoes* lol

[karategrrl]

Milk engorgement. I woke up one morning and I must have been a D-cup. I was spilling out of my bras. The next day I shrunk a little, and bought some 36c bras which were still too small and my boobs were still hanging out. My breasts were rock hard, and it looked like I had an awful boob job.

WOW. What moms go through! I remember, I used to wish they could replicate the milk production hormone so I could get injections of it and get larger breasts. Then I realized it's not that easy!

[honeybunch]

Honeybunch, just curious--how on Earth were you once a D cup and now (I assume) an A? Oral contraceptives?

Milk engorgement. I woke up one morning and I must have been a D-cup if not more. I was spilling out of my bras. The next day I shrunk a little, and bought some 36c bras which were still too small and my boobs were still hanging out. My breasts were rock hard, and it looked like I had an awful boob job.

[Vendetta]

I still have infected feelings for my boyfriend. And I'm starting to believe they won't go away, ever. Our relationship has gotten so bad I don't even want to have sex anymore. Having sex is hell when you're not feeling sexy at all. And, as an extremely sexual couple we were, things are getting hard to handle with.
I just can't forgive and forget about the things he've said. Probably because they were the spark to my problem, and my problem isn't over. I'm not contemplating surgery because of him of course, in fact, I do believe surgery will make things even worse for us (or for me towards him). I believe I don't even want him to be near me by that time.
I know he loves me to death bla bla and I really have no doubt that I turn him on and the guy wants to marry me and have kids and all of that... So my lack of boobs never really was a problem to him, I know that. But... Besides some insensitive comments he made cause he knew I was confident, there are things I'm being obsessive with that I know they don't make sense. Like the attention he gave to my 5-months-A-cups that it's impossible to give now because I can't fake cleavage anymore, or that he prefered them to the real me. Of course he did but it hurts like hell. Well, in the end, I can't forget he's a boob man that fell in love with a small boobed girl and was just being himself. So I guess I hate that part of "himself". Now I can't get undressed in front of him and sex is hell to me. And I can't expect a guy to understand that my libido died because I feel unsexy.
Never thought I would end up this way. Never even thought that small breast support groups existed and that I would end up in one. I had never even thought I would have serious self-esteem issues, to the point I would be considering surgery. But then I think I could never continue living situations like running into every bathroom to take off the silicone pads before intimacy or having a boyfriend asking me why in the hell was I wearing two bras, without having the button "something's wrong" turned on. I've got a really nice turn off button when I don't want to think about something, but nothing lasts forever. And this wouldn't. When my lovely ex-boyfriend once said "you always had problems about your breast size" I was so surprised because I had never in 3 years made a single comment about them. But then, he saw me wearing two bras and saw me growing two cup sizes every morning so that was obvious. And I started thinking about all the embarassing stuff I've done in my life. I was 17 years old when I went out for a night with two bras and with cotton inserted in one of them. I ran into a public garbage to throw away the silicone pads when I was starting with my ex-boy, drunk, just to be looking for them all over the place on the next morning. I had a silicone pad falling off the bra several times on intimate moments. I kept checking them over and over again on night outs, not having fun. I used to smoke some weed and have a "night with myself" on the mirror putting up the padded bra again because "something didn't look right". Those were the kind of stuff I used to do to feel the sexy-as-hell I used to feel. So, was I happy with myself? No. I just wasn't thinking about it.

[karategrrl]

"Vendetta- i most certainly do NOT think that you are shallow and i would never lump you into the same category as the fake-tanned excercise models in karategrrl's magazine. "

I never would have, either.

"i'm wearing an empire-waist/long shirt thingy with leggings today. my advisor said, 'ooo, i need a shirt like that, that's a maternity shirt!' (she is pregnant) ouch. they are flattering in the boob department, and since i'm starting to get a little belly, it's nice to hide it under all that fabric."

Ouch is right! My friend is pregnant and recently bought 2 of those tops in the junior's dept.

[dj-bizmonkey]

vendetta- i most certainly do NOT think that you are shallow and i would never lump you into the same category as the fake-tanned excercise models in karategrrl's magazine. this is a place for you to work through all of your misgivings, worries and frustrations. you should be proud of yourself for being able to name your issue with temerity and forethought.

i'm wearing an empire-waist/long shirt thingy with leggings today. my advisor said, 'ooo, i need a shirt like that, that's a maternity shirt!' (she is pregnant) ouch. they are flattering in the boob department, and since i'm starting to get a little belly, it's nice to hide it under all that fabric.

[karategrrl]

i have to say though..i've had to go dress shopping lately and a lot of the cuts of dresses (empire) i feel like are made for women to show off boobage and then completely cover the lower part of her body. if i wore one of those out i'd look like a total stick. it's depressing.

I'm personally not a big fan of the the empire-waist/babydoll trend. It's breast-flattering but makes even a stick like me look preggers. Since I sew, I've actually bought a couple and then took in all the gathers that made them look all puffy.

[anaisnin]

i have to say though..i've had to go dress shopping lately and a lot of the cuts of dresses (empire) i feel like are made for women to show off boobage and then completely cover the lower part of her body. if i wore one of those out i'd look like a total stick. it's depressing.

[Vendetta]

I'm probably defending myself from myself, and I've thought about it so it's funny you've mentioned it. I hate to think of myself as shallow cause I know I'm not and hate to be put in the same bag as the standard implanted woman. I think that, as it is about everything, there are two sides of the story: the wrong reasons for getting implants and the right reasons. I've seen implanted full B cups and they look adorably natural, just the size I need to be the full grown, mature, powerful and extremely sexual woman I feel within. It's a lot of money and some risks, but we all take risks in life and we only live once and some people are gonna notice the difference and a lot of them will judge me wrong. But the people I care about and care for me, will understand my point of view.
I just had suffered so much in life and I'm only 24 years old, if there's anything that can be done to make me a happier person, I will do it. I know myself in therapists and I know myself in anti-depressants, I know myself living each day at a time and I know what I've achieved in life. It's time for me to be happy without any buts.

[anaisnin]

nice, i'm going to the mall today so i'll check out some of those that you guys have listed..i'm definitely in this maidenform rut, lol. they have a victorias secret, urban outfitters, etc. the target idea is good too. i work nextdoor to a target so i'm always wandering in there on my break looking for random crap to buy, haha. i'm still scared to buy something online b/c i'm soooo picky.

i know mainstream society is different in the us, but i have to say that the guys i've known (i don't think they were lying!!) have said they were not boob men. that they were more into boobs boobs when they were 13. then it all became about legs and butt. whenever i feel insecure i just pretend i'm a rich flatchested model who can lilt around around in little dresses and not give a damn.. it sounds silly, but little images like that i think have kept my self esteem regarding my boobs from going to s***. i'm also worried b/c my mom was one of those people who growing up (when it was the best age to have big boobs), was completely flat and then as soon as she was in her late thirties, her boobs grew, and then by fourty she was a DD!

anyways, if you have boobs that are a good shape and pretty nipples, then chin up!!

[dj-bizmonkey]

here are some of my favorite websites, though admittedly some are expensive. i checked each of them for you, gogosgirl and they all carry multiple styles in a 38A. i've actually found that ordering online, even from hanes, or victoria's secret, it's alot easier to find the right size (if you've been fitted and you know what you are). i guess that's because they have a whole warehouse and not just a storeroom. vendetta, you might like some of these sites too:

http://www.knowknockers.co.uk/

http://www.aronsales.com/storefrontprofile...aspx?sfid=48267 this website has tons to choose from and they are very reasonably priced ($9.99 and up)

http://www.lulalu.com/

i hope that helps! there is also barenecessities.com, but they are sometimes hit or miss. good luck, hope you post in here again!

here ya go anaisin.

i am with you on not liking padding, however. victoria secret of all places was carrying an italian brand called 'intimissi' or something like that. they have these chic, unlined silky bras that can be converted to be halter bras as well. i absolutely love them and they were only ~$15. i bought four bras from the aronsales.com site, but they were slightly padded. shopping at VS online you can search for unlined bras and they have a few good choices. in the past, calvin klein and banana republic had great soft cotton bras with underwire. that has always been my preference. i want a little lift and shape, otherwise, my breasts just disappear! good luck and welcome!

vendetta- living in this modern world and being a liberated woman is all aboutchoice and the freedom to make the right choices for ourselves unencumbered. we have all echoed your desire to be bigger. karategrrl and i have both said that if there was a natural, easy way to make our boobs grow, we would do it. i find surgery scary, i don't like the end the result or the 10 year maintenance. but if it weren't so scary, so fake looking or so expensive, i might opt for it. i guess i worry because your posts sound very defensive and i wonder who you are trying to rationalize your choice to-- us or yourself? if you think surgery is your best option and it will truly improve your quality of life, then i have no right to stand in your way. i'm sorry if we made you feel guilty for wanting to go through with it.....that being said, the cons still outweigh the pros for me personally. i empathize with alot of what you are saying because, deep down, i feel the same way too. i feel less than. i feel less of a woman. i am left wanting more and feeling incomplete.

the harsh reality is that breasts are a symbol of feminity and female sexuality, regardless of whether they are the object of fetishism or simply utilitarian baby feeders. they are still a signal that a woman is sexually viable. however, as i've said before, i think we need to get to the root of the problem, which is that people, especially in the west, have constructed a very narrow paradigm in which to be a woman. there is only one way to be 'feminine' and 'sexy' in mainstream society. we need to expand that paradigm and carve out space for different kinds of femininity. i liken it our mainstream view of sex, which is vastly heteronormative. we assume that sex means penetration of a vagina by a penis. we view sex in this very narrow corridor. that is changing, as is our dichotomous view of gender. i think that the feminine ideal can be expanded in the same way.

(((busties)))

[karategrrl]

Hey, ladies,

Some interesting articles:


http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23924535/

http://www.glamour.com/health/implants/subindex

http://www.glamour.com/sexmen/articles/200...s?currentPage=1


I don't endorse or oppose any particular thing said in them, I just thought it was interesting and informative reading and thought I'd share.