[KeraBear]

Yay! It seems that we have reached an understanding! Good discussion.

I know that I am constantly struggling to find a balance between supporting each other without making anyone else the 'other' if that makes sense.

Oh totally. When it comes to body image, I don't think there is really any such thing as an "other", because as Skindeep helpfully pointed out, most women likely have issues with their breasts in one way or another and that alone should bind us together. But since this group is so specific, I can see how it can easily spin into an "us and them" mentality.

Feel free to disagree with me, but I feel like we handled Spot-on's decision to get implants fairly well, all things considered. I can totally understand why she ultimately didn't feel comfortable here anymore though.

SD - It's good to have a "be grateful day." That should be every day, shouldn't it? And yes, i was disturbed by that link. Deeply.

[skindeep1991]

i hope my opinion didn't offend anyone in here. i do agree that any story that showcases how not all men exclusively like large breasts or implants is beneficial here. i just don't like putting down other women in order to do that. while i don't agree that women should get implants simply to be bigger, i totally support their right to do whatever they please with their bodies.

I don't think you offended anyone really, I think we're all guilty of putting down other women to feel better even if it's not intentional or directed at anyone...It just happens when a group of people with similar opinions on things or thoughts get together.

Personally I think there are worse things in the world than breast size, there are women out there that would kill to have our sized breasts because there breasts are too large and cause pain, Then there are women like some of us that don't feel 'womanly' or 'normal' because we don't have larger breasts... and then there are the women who have 'average' sized breasts that want them to be larger because they believe it will enhance their appearances, not to forget all the others in between...basically everyone has issues with breasts *shrugs* too big, too small, too pointy, too flat, too round, too long, two different sizes... end of the day, we are all very very lucky... we all have loved ones who love us and support us, even if they are on here =D we are able to lead normal day to day lives, we're all beautiful and successful and breast size isn't a handicap or a deformity, it's just a little number... and if you aren't happy then do what makes you happy even if it means implants, piercings, tattoos...whatever.

I think sometimes we've got to stop and think about how lucky we actually are for even the little things...
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wSGz6WKOUfo/SGA4...cEvoy-thumb.jpg

Sorry if that has upset anyone but i'm having one of those 'be greatful' days

[DeeRayy]

That being said, I personally find the SOCIETAL pressure to have large implanted breasts to be almost overwhelming at times. Women with implants do not need to come to this feminist small breast support group forum to find validation for their choice...all they have to do is look at the magazines at the grocery store checkout, or turn on the TV, or go to the gym, or surf internet porn. So if we can't voice resistance to that pressure in here, where can we voice it?

Strongirl, i apologize if you felt i was targeting you in my comment. i only quoted your particular anecdote about implants because it was the most recent one. i do agree that we're bombarded with images of large breasts, but then again we're also bombarded with photoshopped images that make actresses appear thinner than they already are, which i can bet frustrates women who naturally are a little softer and fleshier and will never (healthily) be that thin. i totally agree with you that the pressure that is put on women by society is unfair and that we shouldn't have to defend ourselves for not getting implants. i just didn't like that lately there were posts about how bad it is to sleep with a woman with implants. it seemed very similar to the way the plus size population states that "real women have curves". that was simply my personal opinion.

I support a woman who has augmentation to REPLACE what existed pre-mastectomy, or if she has breasts very different in size and just wants to be able to buy bras with two same-size cups fer god's sake, or a woman who has reduction b/c the weight of her breasts is giving her health issues, for example. But I think most of us fall within a "normal" (wide!) range, whether we're "large" or "small," and women who get either surgery to feel "normal" b/c they feel like they're not when they already ARE makes me sad.

this is my view as well, and this is what i meant when i said that some women get them just to feel normal. i wasn't stating that implants were normal, i just meant that a lot of women actually do have these problems. and that's why i didn't like the comments that had been recently made because when we put down implants, we are also putting down these women.

i hope my opinion didn't offend anyone in here. i do agree that any story that showcases how not all men exclusively like large breasts or implants is beneficial here. i just don't like putting down other women in order to do that. while i don't agree that women should get implants simply to be bigger, i totally support their right to do whatever they please with their bodies.

[coffeebean]

Hi Strongirl, I know that I am one of the least active posters on here but probably a pretty active reader I can't speak for Deerayy but I don't think that you need to apologize for your comments/opinions at all and I know that my agreement with Deerayy's comment was not specifically targeted at you. My agreement was really to acknowledge the 'momentum' that can sometimes build up in a thread like this. I know that I am constantly struggling to find a balance between supporting each other without making anyone else the 'other' if that makes sense.

[karategrrl]

strongirl, you wrote my thoughts. I, too, try to remind myself that not all women who get implants do so b/c they are small and they think there's something wrong with that. BUT I would venture to guess that that's exactly why most women do--no, not all, but most. And, yeah, THAT I do have issue with. I've said it here before, I'll say it again; if small breasts were portrayed as "desired," women would be getting reduction surgery as commonly as augmentation surgery. Remember the flapper era of the 1920's? Large-breasted women were binding their breasts down, and I bet many would have had reduction surgery if it existed.

I support a woman who has augmentation to REPLACE what existed pre-mastectomy, or if she has breasts very different in size and just wants to be able to buy bras with two same-size cups fer god's sake, or a woman who has reduction b/c the weight of her breasts is giving her health issues, for example. But I think most of us fall within a "normal" (wide!) range, whether we're "large" or "small," and women who get either surgery to feel "normal" b/c they feel like they're not when they already ARE makes me sad.

[strongirl]

Sincere apologies if my comments came across as "implant bashing". I've strongly defended people's rights to do whatever kinds of body modifications they want, if it makes them feel good and enjoy their body more, whether that's piercings, tats, implants, or botox. Individual choice rules. And certainly there are implanted women who are lovely, decent, smart, ethical, and sexy people...even if they chose implants for purely cosmetic reasons. I won't judge someone based on what s/he does to their own body, no matter what the reason, but rather on how s/he treats others.

That being said, I personally find the SOCIETAL pressure to have large implanted breasts to be almost overwhelming at times. Women with implants do not need to come to this feminist small breast support group forum to find validation for their choice...all they have to do is look at the magazines at the grocery store checkout, or turn on the TV, or go to the gym, or surf internet porn. So if we can't voice resistance to that pressure in here, where can we voice it?

When I share anecdotes like the one from my coworker, or share my bf's or other guys' preferences for small natural breasts, I'm not de facto slamming women with large breasts or implants. I'm just being a teensy tinesy little voice in the wind saying "Hey! Not all guys prefer big 'uns or fake 'uns! Honest!". I think it's very easy for small-breasted women to lose sight of that, and very helpful for us to keep it in mind.

"some women get them just to feel normal"...yep. It's seen as "normal" to have surgically placed silicone bags in your body...but not to have small breasts. That's what I want to resist. Exactly that.

But I do apologize if my resistance makes anyone feel bad. Not my intention.

[coffeebean]

Here, here, DeeRayy - well said! The comments you made encapsulate the reasons why I think spot-on felt compelled to leave this tread after she decided to get implants. Thanks for speaking up!

[DeeRayy]

On your friend with the implant date, I have a coworker/friend who became single and when he did, was immediately hit on by two of the women in his main social group. He liked them both, both were nice people and attractive but his main reason for choosing one over the other? He prefers small natural breasts and one of them had implants. In his words "a fake top end", lol. He debated telling her why and decided against it. (good call, no point in making someone regret their $6k investment)

i wanna elaborate on this quote a little bit. no man should be using breast type as a deciding factor between two women in the first place. well, maybe if he were interested in purely sex then whatever. some women have legitimate reasons for getting breast implants. no, i'm not advocating plastic surgery. but you can never really know a woman's reasons for getting implants unless you flat out ask her. what about women that struggle with severe asymmetry, or tubular breasts? what about women who have lost breasts due to breast cancer? are we going to call their enhanced breasts gross as well because they're not "real"? i might be sounding a little defensive here but i feel that if we try not to put down large breasted women in here we should also try to be a little more sensitive to the issue of implants, because not every woman gets them for attention or for pure vanity. some women get them just to feel normal, and there's no shame in that. i would never call my breasts "better" than anyone else's, and that includes ladies with implants.

sorry to rant, but i just feel like we do a lot of implant bashing on here. i think all breasts have their pros and cons, even implants. and btw, i'm not including the huge bolt on kind that are bought by young women seeking to look like porn stars. i won't defend those, but i will defend the others. and as far as the whole guys not liking implants thing goes, well, isn't a recurring theme on here that a man should be more interested in you as a person than what's underneath your bra anyway? and shouldn't the quality of sex be determined by the enthusiasm, passion, and chemistry between the two people in bed, not what kind of breasts the woman has?? just my two cents.

anyway, back to the small boobie love. there's been some good stuff on here this week. btw aerobear, i really liked some of the things you had to say

[aerobear]

Small is beautiful too.

I've just watched a program about women who feel very bad about having small breasts. Some were using suction cups to make them larger, while others wanted operations have bags full of silicone shoved inside their chests. I felt so sad watching them suffering because of how they see their own bodies that I felt moved to post on this forum.

I'm a bloke and my girlfriend has got small breasts. I find small breasts very sexy - but that is not why I'm with her. It is the way I feel when I hold her that counts. I've been out with women of all shapes and sizes. The main thing that attracts me to a woman is the look in her eyes. Fake boobs usually look ridiculous and feel horrible. It's like cuddling a car tire. I once had sex with a woman who looked absolutely drop dead gorgeous. It was the most un-erotic sex I have ever had.

Please ladies, don't worry about what your boobs look like. If a bloke is so concerned about the size of your boobs, he is probably so shallow that he is not worth bothering with. Bigger boobs are unlikely to make you happier or more confident in yourself. A woman I knew was absolutely huge in every direction, but carried herself with poise. She looked attractive because of this - her size did not matter. Neither does yours.

[strongirl]

Karategrrl, that's so funny, I had the EXACT same thought - that she should just date his dad!

And welcome, Waterstreet - sounds like you're gonna be a nice addition to this space. Loving your body IS indeed "how it is supposed to be". Good for you!

On your friend with the implant date, I have a coworker/friend who became single and when he did, was immediately hit on by two of the women in his main social group. He liked them both, both were nice people and attractive but his main reason for choosing one over the other? He prefers small natural breasts and one of them had implants. In his words "a fake top end", lol. He debated telling her why and decided against it. (good call, no point in making someone regret their $6k investment)

Kera, circling back a bit here - yes, my breasts got ginormous when I first started breastfeeding but I have no idea how big they were, it just was such a minor thing compared to the joy and stress of a new baby and some of the real health issues I was dealing with at the time. I'd bought nursing bra's months ahead just based on my normal size and they had expandy cups so I didn't need to buy bra's after the fact and just really didn't think much about how big they were, that I can recall. I know that sounds kinda lame but there ya have it.

[waterstreet]

"Um yeah, your BF's comment...it is NOT, I repeat, not, okay to view small-bustedness as something to "make up for" but is there a possibility that he was trying to do that male-bonding stuff with his dad, or that he might have thought his dad would have issue with your bust size and was trying to beat him to the punch? "

Ladies- thank you for the warm welcomes and supportive comments. Love this group already! And I actually ended up bringing up the fact that I saw the message to my BF, and it made me feel soooo much better after talking about it. You are pretty much right Karategrrl. He said he made the comment because he feels exactly the way his dad does, but he wanted to hear his dad say it instead of just agree with him. I thought this might be the case because he has NEVER made a negative comment to me about my breast size, all positive comments about my body and the way I look which is great.

Since that conversation, joining the group and one other conversation (I'll tell in a minute)- I have been back in *loving my body* mode- and it feels so great. This is the way it is supposed to be.

The other recent happening that was helpful was one of my guy friends recently slept with a girl with implants and he just mentioned how he much prefers small natural breasts to fake boobs. Just always good to hear, you know.

Bitty boobies are sexy! Cheers.

[karategrrl]

Welcome, welcome waterstreet! <<<<<big small busty welcome hug>>>>>

Um yeah, your BF's comment...it is NOT, I repeat, not, okay to view small-bustedness as something to "make up for" but is there a possibility that he was trying to do that male-bonding stuff with his dad, or that he might have thought his dad would have issue with your bust size and was trying to beat him to the punch? My hubby does that male bonding "ooh ah look at that chick" crapola with his sons--one of them in particular. I discussed with him more than once how piggish this comes across and his reply was that it's one of few ways he can bond with this particular son (who was definitely absent on the day they were handing out brains and character...hubby will fairly often call him an "asshole" himself...) Mind you, this is not an excuse, but an explanation. The important thing is that those comments are NOT about you--they are about him, really. (Oh, and can you just date his dad? Ha.)

nbdx, I really loved the pics in that article link. OMG, those ladies are all so stupendous, and I'm bowled over at how diverse their bodies are!! Love it!!! Totally proves that hotness and beauty and STRENGTH comes in all shapes, heights, sizes and colors!! Hooray!!

Kera my dear, emptying my mailbox now...I'm a hoarder... but yes, I am popular too!

And let me add, as one of the older ladies here (42), that I still have bad days and moments of doubt. but this little corner of cyberspace has tremendously helped me! Herein, find some of the most intelligent conversation and booblet buddy bonding anywhere! Love to your wonderful, beautiful boobies!! Yeah, we talk this way around here!!!

[skindeep1991]

This is my first time posting- I was so excited to find this group. I actually googled "small breast support group" because I was down after reading a comment the guy I am seeing made to his dad in a message with a pic of me: "kinda flat chested but makes up for it with personality and a pretty face". His fathers response was great, "slender and beautiful what more could a man want? big breasts are overrated" but I was still angry that my guy even felt the need to write the disclaimer.

I want to be super-confident in my cup size like so many of you on here. Sometimes I am, and it feels great, but it's so hard not to let the banter of meat-headed guys get to you. How did you all get to a place of loving your body ALL the time? I am jealous!

Welcome!! also i must agree with DeeRayy on this, I really don't like the sound of your boyfriend... we all have 'bad days' here i'm sure and not everyone is 100% confident I don't think but one thing that has helped me is the support of people like my boyfriend. Because when i'm having a bad day he'll be the first person to tell me how wonderful my breasts are and he loves them... I'm not stating that you need a man to feel good about your breasts and I obviously have no right to judge your relationship as I do not know what goes on but personally if it were me... I don't think your boyfriend is doing much good to your confidence there... his dad on the other hand...good on him for putting his son right.

This place really works wonders for self confidence and hopefully you'll start feeling the benefits of it too ^-^...

On another note... Ladies my nipples have healed up great and sensitivity still feels around about the same, A little bit hightend during arousal but I think that's the norm anyways. I friggen love them and i've been going bra-less a hell of a lot more at least twice a week =D and I can happily inform you guys that it has been over a month now and i've only wore my super padded bra (which doesn't really look good anymore anyway because although it pushes my boobies up it also pushes my nipples up and you can see the piercings at the top of the bra which is not a good look, especially when you're getting a burger at mc donalds and bend over to get your purse out of your bag and the guys at the counter are smirking and talking about your nipple piercings like you can't hear them >.<) twice and that's cause all my others were in the wash! =D YAY x

[DeeRayy]

This is my first time posting- I was so excited to find this group. I actually googled "small breast support group" because I was down after reading a comment the guy I am seeing made to his dad in a message with a pic of me: "kinda flat chested but makes up for it with personality and a pretty face". His fathers response was great, "slender and beautiful what more could a man want? big breasts are overrated" but I was still angry that my guy even felt the need to write the disclaimer.

I want to be super-confident in my cup size like so many of you on here. Sometimes I am, and it feels great, but it's so hard not to let the banter of meat-headed guys get to you. How did you all get to a place of loving your body ALL the time? I am jealous!

hello waterstreet! first of all let me just say that that comment your guy made even irks me. i hate hate haaaaate when someone says that you can "make up" for having small breasts. as if it's some kind of liability! i can see why this upset you, i'd be upset too. hope you don't mind me saying this but i already don't like your boyfriend, and i haven't even met him.

however, even the older and more confident ladies on this thread will tell you that even they still have their moments when their not completely in love with their body. i don't think anyone is in love with their body all the time. and from what i've seen, the younger you are the less accepting you are of your appearance. believe me, i'm only 19 and probably one of the members on this thread that is struggling the most. but i digress. if you're looking for advice on loving your body you should definitely read through the past pages of this thread. lots and lots of good stuff on here!

[waterstreet]

Howdy folks, I felt like popping in to share a great article that I found recently. It's not directly about breasts, but it has to do with body image. I hope you dig it.

Why don't I look like a fitness model

I hope everyone is doing well.

Great article. Society really does put undue pressure on women to look a certain way- and the "poster" women don't even look that way in real life anyway.

This is my first time posting- I was so excited to find this group. I actually googled "small breast support group" because I was down after reading a comment the guy I am seeing made to his dad in a message with a pic of me: "kinda flat chested but makes up for it with personality and a pretty face". His fathers response was great, "slender and beautiful what more could a man want? big breasts are overrated" but I was still angry that my guy even felt the need to write the disclaimer.

I want to be super-confident in my cup size like so many of you on here. Sometimes I am, and it feels great, but it's so hard not to let the banter of meat-headed guys get to you. How did you all get to a place of loving your body ALL the time? I am jealous!

[nbdx0645]

Howdy folks, I felt like popping in to share a great article that I found recently. It's not directly about breasts, but it has to do with body image. I hope you dig it.

Why don't I look like a fitness model

I hope everyone is doing well.

[KeraBear]

Welcome back, SD!!! We missed you too!

Oh yeah, and karategrrl, it's time to delete some messages in your inbox. I just tried to sent you a PM, but it wouldn't go through because it said your inbox is full. All right! Proving that you don't have to have big breasts to be popular!!! Either that or you are just a message hoarder like me.

[skindeep1991]

Hello ladies =D YAY I'm back ^-^ I missed you guys!!!

One other piece of advice re. boobs and aging: use sunscreen. I've seen a lot of women who are in the habit of showing off their "assets" but at this age what they're showing is saggy bags smushed together and up by an industrial strength brassiere covered in wrinkly crinkly leathery skin with some spots that make me think "get thee to a dermatologist - time for a skin cancer check!". My parents live in FL, so believe me, I've seen a lot of this look and it looks scary, not to mention unhealthy.

You know what i've never really though about sunscreen on the breasties.. i'm gonna have to take that into consideration from now on...thanks =D lols...not that we get much sun in the uk anyways haha

[KeraBear]

Strongirl, that was such a totally awesome post. I dont' have young'uns but I really loved reading of that powerful feeling of giving and sustaining life, even with your "boy's" body!! So "HAH!" I say to anyone who gave you shit about your awesome bod!!!

*KeraBear raises up a tall glass of milk in the air* HEAR, HEAR!!! lol Thanks for helping to answer my question, strongirl, you fine thang. Here's another question for ya. Did your breasts get bigger when the milk came in? I hear about women with A cups going all the way up to C or D cups, but then their breasts going back down to normal size later. Just wonderin'

[karategrrl]

I was really scared about what pregnancy, childbirth, and nursing were going to do to my body. Since I'd had an eating disorder and some body issues in college, I was afraid that I'd feel like my body was out of control and that I'd get crazy over it. But I didn't. I loved being pregnant and I adored breastfeeding. And I was good at them! I wanted to flaunt my success all over the place and go "See! See! Now tell me I have 'the body of a 12 year old boy' when I obviously have the power of a woman's body and the ability to start and sustain a human life with this body!"

And I know I've boasted about this before, but I could have fed a small army with the amount of milk I produced. It was totally impressive.

One other piece of advice re. boobs and aging: use sunscreen. I've seen a lot of women who are in the habit of showing off their "assets" but at this age what they're showing is saggy bags smushed together and up by an industrial strength brassiere covered in wrinkly crinkly leathery skin with some spots that make me think "get thee to a dermatologist - time for a skin cancer check!". My parents live in FL, so believe me, I've seen a lot of this look and it looks scary, not to mention unhealthy.

Strongirl, that was such a totally awesome post. I dont' have young'uns but I really loved reading of that powerful feeling of giving and sustaining life, even with your "boy's" body!! So "HAH!" I say to anyone who gave you shit about your awesome bod!!!

And oh, I SO hear you about the chest "crinkle" shit. Bleargh!!! Last week my co-worker's daughter (teenager) was in with her and we all went out for coffee. I was ogling the teen's likely B- or C-cup boobs, trying not to be too obvious and also trying not to hate her and be jealous, but also I found myself looking at her mom's boobs--the wrinkled cleavage variety--and thinking, "Girl, do what your mom didn't do and please sunscreen those beautiful babies!!!!"

Nothing against my larger-breasted sistahs--they have their assets too, for sure--but someone told me this week that he always thought I was about 27. (I'm 42, ahem.) I can't help but think--or know--that my booblets take years off! I'll never look matronly either!!