[karategrrl]

My bf has a HUGE crush on Juliette Lewis, so if you're built like her you better stay away from him, Miss Hot Karategrrl, or you'll have me to speak with.

It's funny - I look a lot like the chick in the blog below but a tad more muscled and a tad less Asian. But anyone seeing us together would think we're sisters.

LOL!!! Well, if you look even remotely like the girl pictured in the article, you are yourself a force to contend with!!!

[strongirl]

My bf has a HUGE crush on Juliette Lewis, so if you're built like her you better stay away from him, Miss Hot Karategrrl, or you'll have me to speak with.

It's funny - I look a lot like the chick in the blog below but a tad more muscled and a tad less Asian. But anyone seeing us together would think we're sisters.

[karategrrl]

Wow, great article! And thanks for the hads up about Juliette Lewis. I had no idea she'd gotten so hot! New girl crush... And our bodies are so similar, it makes me feel great to see her rocking her bad self.

[strongirl]

Wow. Hugely great insight there. Thanks, Kera, for sharing and Secretsights, for insightful commentary.

I think I've failed to see this issue clearly because I've squelched myself and said to myself "oh, it's just sour grapes, you're just pissed because you're skinny and now you need to shut up and give the big girls their time in the limelight". So I never made the connection of "being skinny is seen as promoting bad body image, but having implants is not." That is huge for me. Thank you for the virtual "smack upside the head".

There is a "war on skinny" now and thanks for phrasing it so succinctly, Secretsights. But it's no different than the "war on fat" that reigned when I was growing up. In both cases, the underlying assumption is that we as women are not good enough, we're ugly, we're inadequate. And that we need outside intervention and "experts" - plastic surgeons, diet doctors, diet pills, undergarments that either pad us or shrink us - to help us stop giving offense to any whose eyes fall upon us.

And of course, there's money to be made off of that process.

I'm tired of women's bodies being the goldmine for greed and the battlefield for war and politics (Congo, Egypt spring to mind as recent examples, as well as the current debates here in the US over breastfeeding and also abortion). I wanna shout "Leave us the fuck alone!"

[secretsights88]

Check out this blog from a woman struggling wirh the idea of implants...

http://www.hollyjean.sg/2009/08/my-boobs-and-i.html

I can relate to a lot of what she's saying. In high school I had most of those concerns, I still do every now and then. It's funny how even very pretty women like her, who are models, can be made to feel ugly by stupid, mean spirited comments.

What really struck me was this:

And it doesn't help that magazine images and the media keep presenting supermodels with augmented breasts as the standard of beauty.
.
In fact, I get quite pissed off whenever I read that some anorexic looking model gets pulled out of a fashion show, or a pageant queen gets criticised for being too skinny. They say she's a bad role model for young girls.
.
And yet it's perfectly fine to have models and beauty queens with silicone implants? In fact, the ones with the fake breasts land Victoria Secret fashion shows, sports illustrated swimsuit covers and the Crown to the pageant. How's that promoting a healthy body image???

This is SO true. I'm not into promoting the whole "anorexic" look, but there are many women who are indeed naturally skinny, but not anorexic. A lot of the time, the anti-anorexia talk hurts these naturally skinny women too, because there's a war on skinny, period. I'm not skinny myself, but I can see why it bothers them.

And I think it is indeed hypocritical of society and the fashion industry to demonize being skinny in favor of being curvy, when their definition of curvy is fake. There's nothign wrong with promoting all sorts of beauty, be them skinny or curvy, but I think she has a really valid point when she mentions that being skinny is seen as promoting bad body image, but having implants is not. Of course implants are a personal choice, but sometimes they're even seen as something empowering...

Good read.

[KeraBear]

Check out this blog from a woman struggling wirh the idea of implants...

http://www.hollyjean.sg/2009/08/my-boobs-and-i.html

[secretsights88]

Now that we're talking about body types and celebs, I think Sandra Oh is really hot. Some magazines and people have called her ugly, but I just don't see it. She has a great body and kind of small boobs, and when I've watched Grey's Anatomy, yeah, I think she's looked hot (she's had a couple scenes wearing lingerie). I think the concept of "entire package" applies here... she just looks great as she is... she'd look so strange if she had bigger breasts. I don't know, she's one of those girl crushes I have. I guess because her looks are different and unique.

And I wish I had her hair, lol.

And yeah, I'd much rather be Juliette Lewis, I also love her style and think small breasts go better with that. She's stunning. Much more refreshing than Kim K (she's too made up for my taste... too high maintenance, I mean all the make up, the clothes, the hair, everything). Although I admit I watch the Kardashians show sometimes, it's a guilty pleasure, they're funny in a "am I grateful that I don't have such a crazy family!" kinda way...

Anyway... Juliette Lewis... she's a great example that it's not neccesary to have curves to be soooo very sexy too...

Speaking of other hot smallies with rocking attitude, another of my girl crushes is PJ Harvey... I also know many guys who think the same way, even though she's not exactly curvy, and still they think she's both beautiful and sexy... and of course much more talented than any of them, lol.

[strongirl]

It made perfect sense to me, Secretsights.

On a lighter note, here's a bit of Friday afternoon fun for y'all. Compare and contrast these two youtube clips - wouldn't you rather be Juliette Lewis than Kim Kardashian?

(Note: I don't mean this to bash Kim personally and definitely not to bash by extension other large breasted women. But since some smallies have previously posted in here that their "ideal" is the tall, hourglass, big-breasted, curvy etc etc body type - yes, you, Buttercups - I wanted to provide a fun counterpoint to give ya an opportunity to say for once "Hey, I'd rather be the small-breasted punker chick ruling the crowd than the curvy ideal looking awkward and getting kicked off stage!")

Turn on your sound.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8tOJYNwmPt0...feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40sbDbcA9aM

[secretsights88]

I agree with all of you that this is sad. What kind of role model can you be, especially for a daughter? I think it's a symptom of how society can screw up our ideas of what is beautiful and desirable.

It's true that as women we tend to identify with our bodies, but this shows that if society as a whole placed more value on the inside, then maybe women like Sheyla wouldn't get so mentally skewed to end up doing that to themselves, and thinking that their whole worth comes from that. I mean, even putting your worth as a mother on something like having giant overfilled implants? That's insane.

There's a difference between going for a "standard" increase (don't know how else to put it), like Spot on and Vendetta and many other women, and then having such a skewed vision of who you are, that you decide that your worth comes from your breasts and nothing else, and that the bigger the better. I feel really sad, because this shows that some common notions in our society can be really harmful to some people's minds.

I also read one of the similar articles they had about women in the UK going for implants more and more, and I think that also reflects society's impact on body image. Sure, sure, they do it for themselves, but I think that the media has at least some form of indirect impact on it... I don't know much about the media in the UK, but I don know they have a lot of publications featuring "glamour" models with massive breasts, and that they're practically celebrities over there, so it's all really acceptable and fun. I guess they're used to it now? But it does send the message that the bigger the better, I think, which is not the best message they could send.

Now I'm just writing nonsense... it's good to be back though after being away for a few days

[karategrrl]

Great points, Kerabear and strongirl. I once saw a woman in the grocery store with breasts (implants) almost this big (I swear!). She had her little boy in tow--maybe about 10 yrs old--and I couldn't help but wonder how this kid could NOT get unmercifully teased or be embarrassed.

[strongirl]

What strikes me about this woman's story is that her personal mental illness is a creepy mirror held up to our larger cultural mental illness regarding women's bodies and their purpose. Sad.

[KeraBear]

I wish that Sheyla had been as lucky as we all are here in the Lounge & that she had some sane support & caring people to talk to before all this crazy shit went down. Because she's probably going to die.

This story makes me sad. Yeah, it is too bad that she didn't have a place like this. I don't understand her rationale for being a role model for her daughter. It seems like the opposite message would be appropriate - that you shouldn't let anyone define you by the size of your boobs! Plus I would just die of embarrassment if she were my mom.

[karategrrl]

Those were my thoughts as well. I also find it interesting that she doesn't say "my identity as the women with the world's largest boobs"... she's just "the world's largest boobs". It seems like a pretty good indicator of her mental state on the topic

Ha, good point!

But it just goes to show that if any one of us identifies too closely with any of our external "stuff," it can be bad. If one is centered in themself (and I mean "centered," and not the negatively used "self-centered") it's a better place to be.

I think we all identify to some extent with our external self, even breasts. I mean, for any woman who loses one or both of her breasts to cancer, it can be very difficult, to say the least. But for this woman to feel that without those grossly exaggerated, fake things, she doesn't feel right...uh...Houston, we have a problem.

[discowombat]

Quote from the Sheyla Hershey article:
After her first attempt, she said: "Once I reclaim my identity as the World's Biggest Boobs I can be a better role model for my daughter.
What????!!??

Those were my thoughts as well. I also find it interesting that she doesn't say "my identity as the women with the world's largest boobs"... she's just "the world's largest boobs". It seems like a pretty good indicator of her mental state on the topic

[karategrrl]

Quote from the Sheyla Hershey article:
After her first attempt, she said: "Once I reclaim my identity as the World's Biggest Boobs I can be a better role model for my daughter.
What????!!??
What a shame! Those ridiculous knockers detract from her beauty--or at least she looks pretty here.

[auralpoison]

To each their own, implants or no implants, but I'd like to emphasize what Vendetta said:

Opting for any kind of elective surgery when you are not well resolved within is half way for a bad emotional result.

There's breaking news in the Sheyla Hershey situation. It's heartbreaking that this poor woman tried to change what was broken inside by changing something on the outside. Especially when she went all the way to Brazil for the surgery because 1) implants that size are not kosher in the US & 2) because no doctor in their right mind would do it for her here.

This is one of the reasons I was so very pleased that SpotOn was down with sharing her story with Busties. She was honest, straightforward, & not even a little bit insane. She was in a healthy place emotionally/physically/spiritually & made a very well-informed decision as far as what she wanted for herself, much in the same way many of ya'll have decided that surgery is not for you.

I wish that Sheyla had been as lucky as we all are here in the Lounge & that she had some sane support & caring people to talk to before all this crazy shit went down. Because she's probably going to die.

[KeraBear]

Hello?

*crickets chirping*

Awwww we had such a sweet positive vibe going on in here, what happened?!?

[KeraBear]

Vendetta - Ahhh... okay, thanks for helping me understand. I just wanted to make sure that you have really thought things through with the decision. I am in the same line of thought as Strongirl. Surgery is not for me, and I am not pro-implants by any means, but that doesn't mean that I wish you the best. Good luck!

[_Vendetta]

hello strongirl, I remember you too. Thanks a lot for your understanding, this forum has been the only place were I am able to share an issue like this one and it means a lot to me to be understood and supported - even if the rest of the girls don't feel the same will to solve the "problem" like I do.

It has been a real personal hell to be making this decision.

[karategrrl]

Karategrrl, excellent advice on the exercises, I would totally concur. Without going to a gym, though, it's surprising how much you can gain with plain old pushups.

Yeah, pushups!!! I forgot about those!! I also just realized that maybe some of those cable pec exercises could also be done at home with those elastic workout bands (tied firmly to something very strong, of course). You might have to just do one arm inwards, then the other, not both together like with the cables. <looking into crystal ball> ...Buttercups, I see muscle cleavage in your future...

What about saying to him "I don't want to come between you and your friends but I don't want this weekend to come between you and me, either.

Wow, that was good. Seriously. Have to remmber that.

There was a poster in here who used to work as a stripper but now I forget who that was. At one point, she contributed some awesome material on what it was like, including the fact that being small-breasted was not really a detriment in her work. If she's still around, now might be a good time for her to chime in.

I still have her posts--I saved them, they were so enlightening! But I forget her screen name!