[treehugger]

You know, it's not a thread I'd participate in...(I'm a staunch cbc'er), but I do think the thread is a great idea and I already have a name suggestion: "maybe baby?" as in the movie?

[roseviolet]

Kitten, I completely agree that the discussion does not belong in either of those threads (although I'd love to hear from the people who post in those threads who've worked through the same questions). I don't remember there ever being a thread that focused on this sort of indecision, but certainly I'm not the only Bustie who has struggled with this.

By the by, I'm not thinking of it as an advice thread. I'm not going to ask The Internet whether or not I should have a baby! Rather, I'd like to discuss the choice itself, the pros and cons of both decisions, why some people aren't exactly sure what they want to do, and even how others finally came to a decision.

[kittenb]

That conversation does not belong in Childfree by Choice. There used to be a Childfree Not By Choice thread but I don't think it belongs there either. I would be very interested in that conversation. Can't promise it would last forever but I would like to chat about it.

[roseviolet]

I know we have a couple threads for parents here as well as a thread for the Child Free By Choice-ers. But what about those of us who aren't sure which path they want to take? What about those of us who are trying to decide whether they want to have children or not? Is there an old thread for people like that? Would anyone out there be interested in participating in that sort of discussion? Or should I just post my questions in one of the threads for existing parents?

[auralpoison]

As did I. It's one thing to pimp DIY/indie companies to me while turning me on to useful or interesting stuff, it'a another to cram shite tv in my email.

[culturehandy]

I just unsubscribed.

[pollystyrene]

Fortunately, my email from Bust goes to my crap Hotmail address, so it didn't take up space in my precious Gmail inbox. I didn't even open it, but was still annoyed that they're sending stuff like that out.

[culturehandy]

Add my name to that of being equally unimpressed. TLC is a shit network, I will not support it in anyway.

[kittenb]

I absolutely agree with you candycane_girl. I was so annoyed to get that email this morning. We have no idea if the show is feminist. Just because it is about women doesn't mean that it is in anyway pro-women.

[candycane_girl]

This might not be the right place to post this but I'm quite annoyed that in addition to adding an extra ad space to the lounge (I'm sure everyone remembers the hubbub that caused) I just received an email from Bustline advertising the new TLC show Police Women of Broward County. I think this is going too far. They already have all of their ad space on this page devoted to the show but now I'm getting emails that are nothing more than advertisements for this show. Bust needs to slow it down. If there's one thing I know about advertising it's that people hate getting hit over the head with the same message over and over again.

[Persiflager]

I agree -- if we find it gets a lot of play, then we could start a new thread later.

[auralpoison]

Do we really *need* a musician thread? There'd really only be three people posting which would get old quick. We'd do just as well to repurpose the Guitar Music thread as start a new one. I'm just sayin'.

[girl_logic]

About that musician's thread....

names?

The Beat Goes On

Wine Women and Song

Blame it on the Bossa Nova

She-Bop, the musicians thread (cringe)

Beat Street

I know some of these are veddy cheesy, just brainstorming!

[candycane_girl]

Thanks kitten. I think you're right about how survivors are sometimes viewed differently from other people. I know that harassment and violence happens to a lot of women, so yes, we should normalize it and not marginalize survivors. Of course, those stats still piss me off. I get so angry thinking that we live in a world where this is the norm. You're right about that jerk, he really did make me feel unsafe and he made me feel threatened.

Anyway, I'm kind of rambling now but thank you.

[kittenb]

Thanks!

[girl_logic]

Kitten, there should be a beautiful song written about you. *heart*

[kittenb]

I want to make a clarification about the "Survivor's Space" thread. Before I do, candycane_girl, I know that what you wrote was with the best of intentions and with no intention to offend and I am not offended.
It's not a "sacred space." I do think it is a special thread and I am happy that it here but it is no more member's only than any other part of Bust. One of my goals in the work that I do is to normalize the experience of sexual violence. It happens to soooooo many people and it is a tragedy every time. However, with a current stat of 1 in 3/4 women experiencing it, it also needs to be something that people realize happens to a lot of people. Being a survivor does not make me special or precious or, really, in any way different than other women. I simply say that because of what I went through some parts of me (body, mind and soul) don't work the same as they do for other people. This is neither good not bad, it is what I make of it.
I hope this makes sense. I do get concerned when I feel others worry that survivors are either more delicate or more strong because of what we went through. It is important to me that every survivor is viewed as an individual as well as part of the survivor community.
CCG, in my opinion, what that asshat put you through was a form of non-contact sexual violence. He made you afraid in the way that a woman will be when she feels her safety violated by an implied threat of rape or other violent harm. This is not me saying, "You are one of us now." However, with the prevelance and normalcy of sexual violence, I don't think there is a woman alive who doesn't have some concept of what sexual violence feels like. You are welcome in the thread. Everyone is.

[girltrouble]

oh, sweet dark chocolate jesus with strawberry sauce, syb. that was loverly. i'd love to read more. would you mind moving this convo over the the reel life thread? i'd love to hear you talk a bit about films it applies to (although i can think of a few...)

[sybarite]

GT, it's been a long time since I read Creed; I got into her through analysis of sci-fi film as an undergrad, where her arguments also coincided nicely with my interests in identity politics and feminist film theory. I have not read her since but the darwinian theories sound intriguing.

To see how she intersects with Kristeva, check this out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abjection

On sci-fi film theory you may want to check out Annette Kuhn's Alien Zone, if you're into that as well.

This ends this afternoon's 5 second tutorial. I ate this stuff up back in the day! /derail

[girltrouble]

i've been dying to read them-- thanks for the reminder syb, so crushed out on you right now...*laughs*

aw, poop. i was hoping the library might have something but no dice. meh. it's film theory. i'd want to write in the margins anyways. lol... might as well buy it.

have you read any of creed's other books syb? she wrote a thing on the darwinian theories in film
*pantysplash*

ahem.

sorry. you say darwin and film in the same sentence and i lose all control.