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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
flatgurl
post Jul 8 2009, 04:51 PM
Post #2181


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Posts: 11


Thanks so much for all your wonderful words already, I can tell this is going to be a great place for me and hopefully I can learn a lot too. You all seem to have a lot of confidence and that is what I need to surround myself with. Those bras were all really beautiful too, and it was so refreshing not to see just straight up victoria's secret models busting out of every seam. I wish there were more flat girls around me so that I didn't feel alone, but with all the implants and such these days who can even tell? The thing is that I wouldn't mind having small breasts if I just had breasts, but I really have like none. Sometimes it upsets me when people who are B cups are upset about their chests, because to me that is hugeee, that is all I would ever want to be- at least a full A or a small B (not to say any of you girls with B cups are not justified in feeling the way you do because I'm sure it just depends on where you're coming from), but its hard to hear people that seem sooo much bigger to me say they are small because then its like wow I must be concave! If I ever got to be a B cup I feel like my obsessing would just melt away..heck if I had any breasts at all it would, but there is just nothing there at all..i keep thinking there must be something medically wrong with me, but I get normal periods and just can't find a thing..
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angie_21
post Jul 8 2009, 04:47 PM
Post #2182


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


Sorry, here I am again. I've been wasting a lot of time online today. On a vageuly related note, a reminder for those of us in need of a good dose of reality now and then (and also really hilarious) - this is how pervasive photoshopping is in advertising and the media, especially when it comes to women's bodies:

Photoshop Disasters Blog
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angie_21
post Jul 8 2009, 04:19 PM
Post #2183


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


Hey starship, I was confused when I looked up Panache to see they supposedly specialize in DD+ sizes, but make tons of AA bras. Confusing. Do you know any stores in north america where you could buy them? I hate buying things online when I don't know if they will fit.

Guess what else I just found: AA Lingere.com
I guess someone already beat us to it, although I think a lot of their bras are kind of wonderbra-looking. Still, nice to be able to shop for bras without someone's giant photoshopped gazongas being shoved at me from the computer screen. Someone tell me this isn't a beatiful picture right here! who wouldn't want to look like this. although, after looking around some more, I take it back, there's more than a little photoshopping going on at this website too. *sigh*
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starship
post Jul 8 2009, 12:52 PM
Post #2184


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Posts: 366


Hi new people:)

flatgurl i'm a 34aa and feel exactly the same as you a lot of the time, you should definately keep coming on here and at least read the posts even of you dont post yourself- these ladies are amazing and wise and will help you slowly feel a lot better about yourself and your body. youll find it a refreshing change from the usual mumbojumbo that you hear/see about breasts nowadays.
If you want a padded bra that really works then try a panache one, the come in AA and give even the likes of me cleavage. something like this: http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Panache-Atlantis-T-S...%3A1%7C294%3A50
I wouldnt recommend wearing one everyday though, you should focus more on becoming happy and confident with yourself and changing your mindset rather than your body.
Stick around:)
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karategrrl
post Jul 8 2009, 08:45 AM
Post #2185


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Posts: 714


Hi flatgurl and gettingbetter,

Welcome to both of you! I remember how totally jazzed I was to find this little corner of the internet a couple years back and I'm so glad you've found us too. Stick around, visit daily, and read the older posts. I bet you'll both be feeling a bit more confident in no time. It sure has helped me.

I have to agree with a point angie_21 made--about how breasts seem to be everywhere when we focus on them everywhere--when we get focused on something, we do tend to run all perceptions through this sort of mental filter that makes many things into a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy. Not to say that to some degree people aren't breast obsessed--definetely in some social circles or countries, it is more of an issue. But overall, in the grand scheme of things, it really is not as big of a thing as we can make it out to be. Hope it doesn't sound like I am minimizing your pain--I assure you I am not. I can just tell you from personal experience that a lot of distress I've experinced in life--over body image or other stuff--was stuff I put myself through. No, not all of it, but a lot.

Both of you ladies expressed yourselves so well, which tells me, for example, that you have brains and intelligence, not to mention sensitivity (which is a strength, not a weakness), and also the strength to reach out for help/support, and that's what brought you to this board. Just those qualities alone tell me loud and clear that you are much, much more than a pair of breasts of whatever size. and I'm sure I haven't even scratched the surface. When I feel down, thinking my breasts are too small or my ass too big or whatever, I often catch myself and instead focus on the 9,000 other good qualitites I have. Not to mention I always feel grateful that I have no major health issues, all my limbs, my sight, etc. So many folks in the world don't even have these basic things, and they'd give anything to be a woman with small breasts who can at least walk, or see, or hear, or whatever.

But I'm rambling now. Welcome, ladies. <Big, close hugs (which we can do b/c of no excessive mammary action in the way)>
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angie_21
post Jul 7 2009, 08:19 PM
Post #2186


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


Flatgurl, sweetie, my heart goes out to you. I know all of those feelings very well. Please stay and read the rest of this board. There are a lot of good ideas here and a lot different perspectives on being small-chested that might help you out.

From reading your post, it sound like you have much more than a physical problem. The fact that you put so much weight on your appearance, and let it affect your relationships so strongly, especially zoning in on a single aspect of your appearance like this, sounds a lot like body dysmorphic disorder. I know a lot of it is probably just that you are venting your feelings here, you hopefully aren't as consumed by this as you sound, but once it has gotten to the point where it is affecting how you live your life, it is probably time to try to make some major changes in how you see yourself. I hope that coming here and posting is a step in that direction. There are a lot of girls out there the same size as you, you are judging yourself so harshly. Before you think too hard about surgery, please consider seeing a therapist to help you understand why you are so deeply concerned about one aspect of your physical appearance.

There are a lot of things that you say that show how much you are judging yourself that I want you to notice. For instance, saying you are not a "full grown woman." That you have been "robbed" of something. That you think your boyfriend would be happier with someone else, based solely on the size of your breasts. There are so many things that make a girl womanly, so many reasons for our boyfriends to love us and want us, and breats are such a small, insignificant part of that. You haven't been robbed of any rite of passage. Rites of passage are your first job, your first drunken party, your first kiss, losing your virginity! Only you can rob yourself of these things by focusing on how you look instead of who you are and having fun in the moment.

I know it seems like boobs are everywhere. I used ot feel that way too. But part of it is that, as smaller girls who are sensitive about our chest size, we see boobs everywhere. We notice and draw our own attention to it more often than necessary. I mean, noses are everywhere too, but it's not that big a deal. Never mind the fact that small breasts are sexy, even if you had no breasts (and don't say you have *no* breasts, because we are all lucky if have not had masectomies. There are women who have, and while they truly deserve our sympathy, they can be just as sexy as any of us) it's not the end of the world, it's not the only thing people see when they look at you, and it has absoloutely no affect on your ability to do anything except maybe your ability to wear certain types of t-shirts. It has absolutely no effect on your ability to do any number of sexy things in the bedroom that would make your boyfriend love you forever (believe me, I speak from experience!).

Also.. boobs are what guys talk about 1% of the time. The rest of the time they talk about hockey/football and AC/DC. It's really not that exciting. I don't know what else I can say. Please read this board with an open mind, and note that most of us here are AA's or A's, the same size as you whether you believe it or not. We go through all the same things, and we are OK. Better than OK, we are (as much as any girl can be) happy with what we look like and who we are.

Gettingbetter - good to meet you! Hope to hear more from you. I am a pear shape too! I used to hate feeling disproportionate, but now I just love my sweet ghetto booty smile.gif It is true, be confident and everyone will believe you!
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flatgurl
post Jul 7 2009, 02:22 PM
Post #2187


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Posts: 11


Hi girls, I'm new here and I've been reading through all the threads and it's so nice to find a place for some support. I'm 25 years old and it's like my breasts never grew- at all - I am a 32AA with the help of birth control pills. This has been such a source of distress for me that it has ruined previous relationships because I have no self-confidence whatsoever and am always feeling ugly and inadequate. I've never known another woman to be as flat as me, and my sister is actually one of those skinny girls with DDs. At the age of 25 I have pretty much given up hope that any more growth will ever happen to me. I am always thinking that there is something wrong with my body and have searched for potential health problems that may have caused this, but I've never gotten any answers and no doctors have ever told me that my lack of growth is a problem due to my small stature. I am so so sooo sick of feeling this way and of worrying every 5 seconds that my bf is disappointed with me, that I don't turn him on, or that he would be happier with someone else. He tells me all that time that size doesn't matter- but that doesn't mean a guy finds you beautiful just because he says it "doesn't matter". I struggle all the time with the media images of beautiful women because they never remotely resemble anything like what I look like- a tiny girl with no boobs who looks like a child. People have called me a lot of names my whole life for being so flat . To be honest, I never even noticed that my lack of breasts was an issue until people pointed it out to me around age 16. Before then I was flat and didn't even think about it, but now it's become more or less an obsession. I mean boobs are everywhere- they are what guys talk about and want and i just have never been a part of that world. I am so self-conscious that I have never been able to randomly hook up with anyone i am attracted to ( which i guess has its good points) because I could never let anyone in on my secret that I don't know reallyyyyy well (like I didn't let my bf see me without clothes for at least a year, and even now I'm still terrified). this has just caused me to absolutely HATE my body and i consider implants so often, even though the whole idea of it scares me to death. I don't want to have to pump my body full of plastic, but i do want to look like a normal girl. It just feels so unfair to never grow into being a full-grown woman, like I've been robbed of that rite of passage. I am trying so hard to deal with this and trying to stay positive, but everyday is a struggle. I want to learn to love my body but im not sure if that can ever happen for me, i just don't think I look good like this, and I doubt I ever will. I currently wear padded inserts in my bra, which causes a whole lot of problems bc i'm embarrassed for my bf to know that I do this so I always have to be discreet about it-it can be really hard sometimes. Does anyone know where to find a padded bra that will make me look like a full A/small B? I've tried V.S. but those still make me look flat as ever! putting inserts into your bra is just uncomfortable and annoying, but its the only thing that enables me to go outside and not feel like people are staring and thinking im ugly and unfortunate. i just need help and support. i want to overcome these bad feelings. sorry this is so long, but this issue just tortures me everyday...
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GettingBetter
post Jul 4 2009, 09:38 PM
Post #2188


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Posts: 1


This is an amazing forum. I've been reading it for a little while, and I have to get on it and comment. So many so-called "support groups" really just discuss breast enhancement options, which push-up bras make it seem like you have cleavage, etc. It's so refreshing to find one that discusses the positives of small-breastedness rather than how to change it! I'm still really trying to come to terms with my body (I'm fairly tall and a bit curvy on bottom -- I feel out of proportion with my small chest), but reading this thread has helped so much.

For so long I've worried about how men view my body, and women, too (I've received quite a few snide remarks from ladies with larger chests). But I think that if I flaunt what I have in a confident way, others will perceive my body in a better way too. The other day I went braless for the first time ever, and I received so many more compliments than usual (not about my boobs specifically, just comments like "I can't tell what it is, but you look so nice today!"). Everyone who's considering bralessness should give it a try!
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KeraBear
post Jul 4 2009, 11:25 AM
Post #2189


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Posts: 265
From: USA


I also went without a bra recently, Angie! Our experiences were similar. I decided to be superbold and went bare at an outdoor barbeque/concert thing (although i also wore a tanktop underneath because my nipples are so obnoxious). I half expected my boyfriend to pick up on it right away and be like, "ummm... dude, where did your breasts go?" But surprisingly he was pretty oblivious. It wasn't until the end of the night when he was hugging on me did he realize i wasn't wearing a bra. Then he said, "I think it's sexy." It made me feel good. wink.gif At least now the secret is out. My boyfriend loves me AND my tiny booblets. I guess it's true, most guys just plain like boobies big or small. It's all goooood in my neighborhood. smile.gif
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TheBeesKnees
post Jul 4 2009, 09:43 AM
Post #2190


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Posts: 61
From: Nebraska


You know how a lot of girls are getting those cute swallows on their chests these days? Well, I heard about someone's mom who got a bee on her boob [boob-bee - cute, right?], and decided that instead of little birds with banners, I'm gonna get two bees, one on either side of my chest, with little banners that read "Itty" and "Bitty". Yup.
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Allison-Shine
post Jul 2 2009, 11:49 AM
Post #2191


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Posts: 130
From:


QUOTE(strongirl @ Jul 2 2009, 10:14 AM) *
And I still think lots - maybe the majority - of guys just like breasts, regardless of size.
Ailurophile, "Looking bigger is not heaven. Loving my tiny tits is." Yes, ma'am!!!


I think guys are just happy or lucky to be in contact with a pair no matter what size. Took me too long to realize that. This fourm even helped an sometimes very insecure me to understand that quicker and better.
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strongirl
post Jul 2 2009, 09:14 AM
Post #2192


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Posts: 295


I really love all the positive energy and small-breast appreciation going on in here lately. Y'all are such amazing, intelligent, thoughtful women, it keeps me checking and posting here even when I feel like I shouldn't spend so much time on a forum chatting with people I don't even really know.

On the question of guys and moms, it has been discussed in here previously and people's experience was all over the place, so I don't think there's a pattern. My late mother-in-law was extremely large-breasted and all her sons prefer small breasts, promoting the "opposites" theory. But I think it was Crinoline who said that her boyfriend's mother was very small-breasted and he prefers small girls too, so I'm pretty sure it just varies. And I still think lots - maybe the majority - of guys just like breasts, regardless of size.

Ailurophile, "Looking bigger is not heaven. Loving my tiny tits is." Yes, ma'am!!!



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angie_21
post Jul 2 2009, 08:42 AM
Post #2193


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


So yesterday in response to this message board, I went all day without a bra - out shopping & to a BBQ, and big surprise, no one really noticed. My boyfriend didn't even notice until I pointed it out, and his only response was, "oh. hey, nice tits, by the way" (he's a classy one smile.gif ) I did feel a little self conscious without the extra inch that the lined bra gives me, and I wore a tank top under my shirt to prevent any nipple problems, but still, I thought it was a minor victory. I did feel pretty comfortable without underwire poking me in the ribs, and not having to constantly pull my straps back up onto my shoulders. I might also head out to the expensive bra boutiques and look for an unlined AA sometime this week.

Another complaint - there's this awesome, awesome bra at La Vie En Rose (my favorite semi-mainstream lingere store in this city) that's meant to be worn with low cut shirts, it's one of the convertible, crossover, deep plunge front type bras, and it gives just the perfect amount of lift to be worn with a revealing top. So guess what sizes it comes in? B-D. I tried it on in a 34B and of course it fits great except for the strap being wayyy too tight, and I have some fo those extension thingies at home, but at that point I was too self-righteously angry to buy it. If I'm gonna pay $50 for a bra, I want it to fit right without having to fix it myself, dammit!
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Allison-Shine
post Jul 1 2009, 10:29 PM
Post #2194


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Posts: 130
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QUOTE(TheBeesKnees @ Jun 30 2009, 05:38 PM) *
...although there's definitely days I wouldn't mind be a B-cup...

And now this thread had me thinking about all the other times my small boobs are referenced. Hmpf. Shit. On the bright side: my boyfriend loves them. That probably doesn't hurt my confidence too much. I'm lucky I've never really come across jerky guys...just jerky girls biggrin.gif


Yes, surprisingly in my experience as well is the girls that tease, gloat and make it way more an issue than the guys do. Especially younger ones.
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TheBeesKnees
post Jul 1 2009, 09:53 PM
Post #2195


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Posts: 61
From: Nebraska


QUOTE(angie_21 @ Jul 1 2009, 09:05 AM) *
BeesKnees sorry for freaking out at your friend. Although, I would still be a bitch right back to her, seriously. Life's too short to be spent with people who are inconsiderate based on the excuse that "I'm not being mean to you, I'm just like that with everyone." But yeah, it's weird how so many girls have no idea about what guys want in reality, compared to what we see in magazines and on the covers of pornos. (Not to say I'm so naive as to think guys don't love lots of boob, but just that, there's so many things just as important, or more so. And it's unfair to men to think they are all too dumb to appreciate quality as well as quantity)

Even better, we can make tiny bras (no AA sizing, sorry, we can find a system more useful than that!), and clothes that fit well without bras anyways. Like maybe t-shirts that aren't paper freakin thin and that don't display for the world not only the shape of your nipple, but the color too?

Oh, I didn't think anyone freaked out! And she's not my friend, she's my sister's friend. I'm just around when I hang out with my [equally tiny-boobied] sister, who I love enough to endure almost anything wub.gif

And your reference to double-As reminds me: [this has happened more than once], when I've gone to Von Maur to look for bras, the sales clerk has told me [when I ask for As], "...and if those don't work, we have double As over there." But I don't think she was being snide, just helpful. In her way biggrin.gif

And I'm not sure who exactly who was talking about this, but it would be awesome if they made bras to fit the actual size that they are. Sometimes I'm just swimming in A cups - they just fit all weird, and I'm like, "seriously?!" With as much attention as we put on breasts, everyone should have comfortable, flattering bras. If they so choose to wear one.
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girl_logic
post Jul 1 2009, 11:31 AM
Post #2196


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Posts: 276


I love hearing first hand stories about women's activism in the 70's 80's. It just gives me a great feeling, reminds me of my childhood and watching my mom and her friends and their energy then. Makes me feel grounded and rooted.

This bra sizing talk makes me think of a guy some other Busties dubbed the Bra Rabbi on Orchard Ave in New York. I keep meaning to get sized by him when I'm there - apparently he's absolutely amazing and has re-fitted many a Bustie correctly!


--------------------
There are years that ask questions and years that answer. - zora neale hurston
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angie_21
post Jul 1 2009, 09:05 AM
Post #2197


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


Hey edie, I think we are the same bra size lol

Yeah, the author thought she was being tongue-in-cheek and funny, but she was really just being condescending and vaguely offensive. We've all heard that bra size stuff a million times. Also, if she had shown the straps of those bras, it would be a lot easier to see which one was which, because an A cup as big as a D cup would still look like an A once you saw how long the strap on it was.

BeesKnees sorry for freaking out at your friend. Although, I would still be a bitch right back to her, seriously. Life's too short to be spent with people who are inconsiderate based on the excuse that "I'm not being mean to you, I'm just like that with everyone." But yeah, it's weird how so many girls have no idea about what guys want in reality, compared to what we see in magazines and on the covers of pornos. (Not to say I'm so naive as to think guys don't love lots of boob, but just that, there's so many things just as important, or more so. And it's unfair to men to think they are all too dumb to appreciate quality as well as quantity)

On a related funny story note.. a while ago I was with some friends, and one guy (drunkenly) was trying to describe a well-endowed actress. He couldn't quite find the words he was looking for, I think because he was trying to be "respectful" so he came up with saying she was "full of boobs." ha ha

lol starship, I've heard that too, but it was interms of personality instead of appearance! So guys learn what the "role" or a woman in a family or relationship is based on the role their mother played when they were growing up.. so if their mom was a career woman, they are more likely to be attracted to smart, stronger willed women, but if their mom stayed at home they will want to marry a sweet, subservient housewife... See, that doesn't sound too believable either, does it? It's a bunch of freudian stereotypes that may have a statistical basis in reality somewhere, but are overinterpreted and oversimplified by pop psychology, and aren't really true.

Even better, we can make tiny bras (no AA sizing, sorry, we can find a system more useful than that!), and clothes that fit well without bras anyways. Like maybe t-shirts that aren't paper freakin thin and that don't display for the world not only the shape of your nipple, but the color too?
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edie52
post Jul 1 2009, 09:03 AM
Post #2198


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Posts: 1,011
From: back home


I was annoyed by that, too, karategrrl, but I try not to let that stuff get to me anymore. A = adolescent? My almost A's are forever, yo. And I'm okay with that.
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karategrrl
post Jul 1 2009, 07:29 AM
Post #2199


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Posts: 714


Okay, I just read that blog about the bra sizes. It's very interesting but we totally don't need all the negative references to A-cups, like this:

A cups are only “almost” breasts, according to our enlightened email-forwarding brethren. How can they be nearly as big as DD (”double d@mn!!”) cups?

And this (in reference to when the author was an A-cup): I have fond memories of the fourth grade.

The author can seriously go fuck herself. And that comes from me and my "almost " breasts. mad.gif
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karategrrl
post Jul 1 2009, 07:20 AM
Post #2200


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Posts: 714


QUOTE(starship @ Jul 1 2009, 01:06 AM) *
I vaguely remember hearing something about guys going for girls with similar breast size to their mothers. Please someone tell me I made that up. It does sound pretty ridiculous.


I once dated a guy whose mom and sis both had huge knockers. (I saw one of his mom's bras dangling from the doorknob one day and I was actually startled at the size of, the engineering, etc.) Anyhoo, I once gingerly brought up the subject and he said something like that big boobs didn't matter one way or the other b/c he was used to seeing them on his mom and sis growing up. He turned ot to be a dick but I do give him credit for that.

Hey edie52, maybe you could get a couple of bra extenders? They sell 'em in sewing/craft stores alongside the sew-in bra cups and shoulder pads. that ight help with the band tightness.
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