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 let your fingers do the walking...the masturbation thread. |
 Jan 14 2007, 04:30 PM
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#501
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 Newbie  Posts: 6  |
Things have really opened up recently with my female friends wanting to talk more about vibrators and masterbation, and this is wonderful. It took too long though -- we are all in our 40s! Oh, how I wish some of this had been covered when I was a teenager. My sex life through the years could have been so much better, and I would have been much less of a bitch! :-) Is this just my generation (GenX)? Are you 20- and 30-something girls much more open and healthy, and if so, why???
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Jan 14 2007, 11:06 AM
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#502
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Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 142 From: Vancouver, BC |
In both Canada and the UK I've seen vibrators marketed that way in drugstores. It always makes me really happy.
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Jan 14 2007, 07:10 AM
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#503
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 BUSTie Posts: 23 From: Hamburg, Waterkant |
my first post since agens and just some o/t observation i made: lots of drugstores here in hamburg/germany started selling sex toys some weeks ago. real ones (various vibrators, smart ball like vaginal exercise balls), not neck massage devices that can be misused. what also catched my eyes was the fact that the products are based in the sanitary napkin/tampon section of the store i went to.
another thing that suprised me was a commercial for lubricant airing during the gilmore girls break this week.  i think that's just great.
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Jan 13 2007, 11:53 PM
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#504
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Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 142 From: Vancouver, BC |
My laya spot had three differnet pulsing sensations and I never used them. They weren't bad, they just didn't do anything for me.
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Jan 13 2007, 02:58 PM
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#505
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Newbie Posts: 6 |
I am looking for some advice on toys! Has anyone tried vibrators with the different sensations, such as rollercoaster, etc? Are they worth the price?
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Jan 11 2007, 02:02 PM
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#506
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 Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 647 From: NYC |
this might be drastic to say euphorically but as a feminist, not only should you NOT feel guilty, but you shouldnt be dating a man like that. what AP said was right, its emotional blackmail, and i cant imagine it doesnt show up in other places of your relationship. really, not cool at all.
-------------------- “There's something about the Irish that is remarkable.”-François de la Rochefoucauld
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Jan 11 2007, 12:51 PM
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#507
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Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 954 |
I love watching guys jerk off too, especially cuz it seems that all guys do it slightly different. Some guys go fast, others real slow, some stroke their shaft, others stay on the head, etc....a wonder if it says something about the guy? That would be a funny personality test!
-------------------- I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.--John Waters
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Jan 11 2007, 12:40 PM
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#508
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Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 519 From: the shallow south |
Yeah, I love to watch a guy jerk off, too. I used to be self-conscious about doing it myself, but I have gotten over that pretty much. I still feel a little embarrassed about having them be totally staring at me the whole time, but I love for them to watch me and hold onto me when I rub my clit or use my vibrator or whatever.
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Jan 10 2007, 06:49 PM
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#509
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BUSTie Posts: 27 |
QUOTE(maddy29 @ Jan 10 2007, 04:23 PM)  it's kinda cute and funny, cause my boy loooves it when i masturbate with him there in bed with me, or whenever. but he's still too shy to do it himself. i'm not sure why, i guess i should ask him. i definitely think it'd be hot to watch him please himself-i mean, not stare at him the whole time or anything...  that might be a little awkward.I have asked and watched. A woman has never asked to watch me but I am open minded!
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Jan 10 2007, 10:06 AM
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#510
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Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 934 From: Boston, MA |
it's kinda cute and funny, cause my boy loooves it when i masturbate with him there in bed with me, or whenever. but he's still too shy to do it himself. i'm not sure why, i guess i should ask him. i definitely think it'd be hot to watch him please himself-i mean, not stare at him the whole time or anything...
that might be a little awkward.
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Jan 9 2007, 06:17 PM
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#511
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BUSTie Posts: 27 |
QUOTE(maddy29 @ Jan 5 2007, 04:52 PM) yah really, who the fuck is he to tell you you can't masturbate? whoa dude. that's pretty whack. last night i was like hmm, should i do it now or wait for boyfriend to come over? then i was like i just want to cum!!!!!!!! right now!!!! and i didn't want to bother with his pleasure or anything, i just wanted to cum a bunch of times, and i did, and it was great. i told boyfriend later and he thought it was hot. if he ever tried to forbid me to do that, i'd flip the fuck right out. and laugh in his face. Well put! Women who masturbate are hot! I am suspicious of one who doesn't. I feel that if a women cannot get herself off what are the odds that I can? I had a friend recently give me the, "when I think of you I touch myself line" and I could not get to her place fast enough! I like women who matrbate, I like to watch, I like to hear about it. I think that they are better lovers. If a guy tells you not to, kick him to the curb! |
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Jan 7 2007, 04:31 AM
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#512
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Newbie Posts: 7 From: Sydney, Australia |
Ha, I think you are right ladies.
I think he gets jealous, although in my book, its an entirely different thing. I appreciate you all validating my masturbation habits, so thanks again. |
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Jan 6 2007, 11:26 AM
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#513
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 Newbie Posts: 5 |
actually yeah... this is an odd odd time.
i'm much better off without my ex... BUT, he and the woman he cheated on me with and left me for (like, right after he met her) just had their baby. a few days shy of them knowing each other for a whole year. ex took off almost a year ago to be with her far far away and our kids never see him and he rarely even calls. i'm usually fairly okay with all this, but the holidays and the baby thing definately make things harder. also. the situation with the new lover is strange. we were sortof friends for a long time but usually managed to avoid each other. i lived with him and his wife while i was figuring out what to do. him and the wife were more friends than anything else and have broken up before... lover is poly (which is fine by me), and wife thought that if she allowed him to actually go out with other women that it would fill that lack of romance gap and they could stay married. so she actually approached me about that, because she knows me and trusts me... and i turned the idea down flat. they broke up not long after. lover and i have since gotten romantically involved and while i'm still friends with lover's ex, it's a reeeeeeeally awkward situation. no one is lying or sneaking around or anything sketchy. it's just uncomfortable. so yeah, i guess that answers the question. BUT... orgasm during sex has NEVER really happened except on maybe 4 or 5 occasions. and it was never like this mind blowing awesome thing. pretty good orgasms by myself were also pretty recent and i was sortof looking forward to where that might lead. so what i'm saying is... even if the recent BLAH orgasm thing is because of all the stress (which i'm sure it is)... where the hell are the awesome orgasms on a regular day?? |
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Jan 6 2007, 10:54 AM
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#514
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 olha, que coisa mais linda..... Posts: 1,361 From: somewhere south....VERY south |
hi, pleiades!
have you changed anything else recently? medications? hormonal contraception? anything else you can think of? did your marriage end bitterly? any fall out from that? any major change (and lots of little ones that add up to a lot!) can change how you respond to sexual stimulation. it is difficult to tell with only the information that you have given us what might be the difference. one thing that you hint but are not clear about is that you were able to have easy, satisfying orgasms when you pleasured yourself, but NOT with your ex. and now you are able to have good sex with your current lover, but the orgasms aren't as good? do i have that right? if so, part of that might be just that you are no longer doing this alone. having someone else there may be part of the problem as well as the solution. what else can you tell us? |
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Jan 6 2007, 08:06 AM
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#515
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Newbie Posts: 5 |
oh help.
i have never ever ever had an easy time having an orgasm during sex. i've only recently enjoyed really GOOD sex at all... i was married to a no foreplay 5 minute man for seven years. (very frustrating, my shower head and i became great friends during that time) suddenly i have this awesome lover, and the ACT of sex is just fantastic. he did actually manage to get me to cum AND orgasm, but the orgasm was sooooooo itty bitty. ever since he and i got together... my orgasms just suck. they're quick little things and i barely notice them. i used to be able to have really nice drawn out ones with very little effort. now i have to work and work and work and then there's just no bang. i'm just sortof done. what the heck??? help me. |
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Jan 5 2007, 10:35 AM
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#516
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Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 934 From: Boston, MA |
yah really, who the fuck is he to tell you you can't masturbate? whoa dude. that's pretty whack.
last night i was like hmm, should i do it now or wait for boyfriend to come over? then i was like i just want to cum!!!!!!!! right now!!!! and i didn't want to bother with his pleasure or anything, i just wanted to cum a bunch of times, and i did, and it was great. i told boyfriend later and he thought it was hot. if he ever tried to forbid me to do that, i'd flip the fuck right out. and laugh in his face. |
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| pepper |
Jan 4 2007, 10:59 PM
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#517
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sick. that man's mind is sick. the more sex i have, the more sex i have with myself. seriously.
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Jan 4 2007, 10:21 PM
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#518
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 Big Fat Bitch Posts: 4,931 From: Citizen of the world |
Euphorically, that's ridiculous! Demanding "honesty" & that you "save" your sexuality for only the two of you is emotional/physical blackmail. Sex doesn't always have to be about sharing with your partner. The sex you share is the sex you choose to share; he doesn't own your vagina & can't tell you that you can't make it happy by yourself just because he doesn't like it.
Sometimes you just want, nay NEED a little solo sex. Maybe you're bored, tired, stressed, etc. or maybe you just want to get in, get off, & get out without worrying about the other person's pleasure. Questions: Are you not getting enough sex with your partner or are you just pleasing yourself to please yourself? Is he jealous? Feeling inadequate? Got Catholic guilt? Either way, ya'll need to talk cos that just ain't cool. -------------------- "You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."
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Jan 4 2007, 10:11 PM
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#519
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 Hardcore BUSTie Posts: 189 |
QUOTE(euphorically @ Jan 4 2007, 11:07 PM) Perhaps you ladies can help me. My partner hates me masturbating and says I should want to make love more if I want to. He believes there should be no secrets and that we shouldn't do it and save it for each other. To be honest, I enjoy it and now feel all guilty-like. We have been together five years, so you can imagine that the sex has cooled down somewhat. As a feminist, I cannot believe I feel guilty but I do do do! Don't! |
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Jan 4 2007, 09:50 PM
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#520
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Newbie Posts: 7 From: Sydney, Australia |
Perhaps you ladies can help me.
My partner hates me masturbating and says I should want to make love more if I want to. He believes there should be no secrets and that we shouldn't do it and save it for each other. To be honest, I enjoy it and now feel all guilty-like. We have been together five years, so you can imagine that the sex has cooled down somewhat. As a feminist, I cannot believe I feel guilty but I do do do! |
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