[DeeRayy]

rant!

so i'm sure you guys are familiar with those studies on "attractiveness" and what makes us attractive from a biological standpoint. well, it really irked me when my roomate came home talking about how in her sociology lecture they went over what is supposed to be attractive in a woman from an evolutionary/biological standpoint, which is a small nose, larger eyes, a small chin, and a low waist-to-hip ratio. my roomate is very...well, she likes being told what to do and what is right/wrong and so she totally ate it up. these studies have always ticked me off because i am basically the antithesis of these features. i have a prominent ethnic nose, small hips, and small boobs so it really bothers me when these studies basically tell me that i am the total opposite of what men naturally find attractive. and it bothers me even more that these concepts are being taught to university students as simple facts of life. i don't want to sound overdramatic, but it's things like these that make me feel like i inherited no physically attractive features whatsoever =/

[KeraBear]

Thanks Deerayy. Your response really hit the mark. i do feel better about things now. You rock.

[DeeRayy]

I have a quick question. When you have a bad boobie day, do you ever experience feelings of... guilt? Whenever i get down on myself I sometimes feel even worse because I think about how I have this healthy body that lets me do such amazing things! Like what would a crippled person think about my talk of struggling with such an insignificant thing? I dunno... I sometimes feel like a bad person. Is that silly?

I definitely know what you're talking about kerabear. sometimes i just feel so ridiculous for letting my boobies get to me so much when there are so many people out there who would give the world just to have a working, healthy body. i think that you should keep that in mind just for perspective' sake. but i don't think we should feel like bad people for struggling with our bodies. it's not like i wake up and say, "yup, i'm gonna continue feeling ashamed of my boobies today!". i truly wish i could just snap my fingers and make my problems go away, but i can't. it's not something we do on purpose, and i think considering the society we live in it's not very far fetched to struggle so much with one body part. and my boobie issues go much deeper than just aesthetics. they are much more about feeling like a woman, and to a slightly lesser extent, feeling desirable. i think that those are things that almost every woman wants to feel. so yes, we should be thankful for being healthy but i don't think it's good to beat ourselves up over emotional issues that we don't have complete control over.

[KeraBear]

I have a quick question. When you have a bad boobie day, do you ever experience feelings of... guilt? Whenever i get down on myself I sometimes feel even worse because I think about how I have this healthy body that lets me do such amazing things! Like what would a crippled person think about my talk of struggling with such an insignificant thing? I dunno... I sometimes feel like a bad person. Is that silly?

[KeraBear]

I think it can be very helpful to use another person's view to help bring ourselves into touch with reality. And when I tell my inner critic to listen to his worshipful appreciation...it shuts the bitch up!!!

LMAO!! This is so great!!!

And do take good care of yourself, girl - be gentle and nurturing to DeeRayy. She deserves it!

Hear! Hear!

[strongirl]

Awww, DeeRayy, (((((big hug)))))!

I don't know this guy nor do I know enough about him to predict his reactions. But I want to mention some possibilities. As painful as this was for you, Kera is right - you're talking about it and that might be a good thing. I think most of the women who post in here have had similar experiences when we've been with a guy, even our partners, and had something trigger our insecurities. While some of the resulting conversations reported in here have been hurtful, many have been helpful, some even on the level of "personal breakthrough" in terms of helping us get over our issues. My boyfriend has helped me so much - not even intentionally for the most part - just by adoring my breasts and being totally turned on by them. And also in the things he's said which I have gradually come to truly believe - that "boobs are boobs and he does like them all", but he particularly likes mine. That implants and big boobs can be eye-catching but there's no way mine could be "improved upon". That even apart from me, he really does have "a thing" for smallies, as demonstrated in his "porn collection". That once a man is touching a woman's breasts, their size isn't even entering his mind, it's the woman's reaction to being touched that he's focused on. (As a bi- woman I can confirm this from my own perspective when I've been with other women.)

There's a tricky line there - no one can "fix" another person's problems and you don't want to give away your power by having your self-worth determined by another person's reactions to you. But our insecurities are distortions. I think it can be very helpful to use another person's view to help bring ourselves into touch with reality. And when I tell my inner critic to listen to his worshipful appreciation...it shuts the bitch up!!!

The reality is that this guy is attracted to you. If he wasn't, he wouldn't be getting erections and you wouldn't be having sex. Whether or not your FWB arrangment survives this somewhat more psychologically intimate exchange, and your own "end it before it gets too uncomfortable" reaction, remains to be seen. But consider the possibility that this "setback" may be an opportunity. And do take good care of yourself, girl - be gentle and nurturing to DeeRayy. She deserves it!

[KeraBear]

awwww Dee, so sorry to hear about your bad boobie day! Yes i can understand how that might throw you off your game a bit. (((big hug!!!!))). Ahhh yes, the ol' boobs are boobs and i like them all line... but you know what? i think there really is something to that. I think most guys are satisfied to get their mits on any pair. At least you are talking about it now though. That might be a good thing?

[DeeRayy]

hey ladies.

sooo i experienced a setback this weekend. i had a bit of an episode about my boobies in front of my fwb. while we were discussing body image today in the car the subject of implants came up and it totally triggered me. he didn't even say anything that positive about them, just that they look cool sometimes but feel weird and that he associates them too much with trashy porn women. but of course i started thinking about my booblets and got very quiet for the rest of the ride home.

he eventually wanted to know me tell him what was wrong and i simply can't talk about that subject to someone else without crying, idk why. so started tearing up and briefly explained to him that boobs are a sensitive subject for me because i've struggled with that part of my body for a long time and that I've had some pretty negative experiences before. i also admitted that that's why i don't take my bra off with him. he was pretty surprised that i actually cry over it, and so he hugged me and told me not to let it get to me and gave me the old "boobs are boobs and i like them all" line. so at least he tried to help, and i wasn't expecting him to know what to say anyway. i (obviously) wasn't in the mood for sex after that so i went back to my apartment.

i really don't want to let me distance myself away from him all because of my boobie issues, because i know i have a tendency to do that. the sex is great and even though we're not serious it would be really stupid for me to stop seeing him because of that. i'm kinda embarrassed that he saw me like that and idk if it's gonna effect our sexual chemistry. before this happened i was able to ignore my boobie issues for the most part. and now that it's out in the open i'm afraid i'll be even more inhibited. i don't have a specific question for you all, I just came on because it's been a bad boobie day for me. i just really hope this gets easier for me with time. hope you all had a great weekend though! mine was pretty nice if you exclude today.

[discowombat]

This is a bit off topic but clever nonetheless http://vimeo.com/34813864

[discowombat]

This is a bit off topic but clever nonetheless http://vimeo.com/34813864

[KeraBear]

"Is it wrong to actually enjoy having small breasts and wanting to show them off?"

No, it's not wrong, it's very right, and don't let the stupidity stop you from enjoying and sharing your body! I won't if you won't! Deal-io?

Count me in! Pinky swear. (titty swear?)

[KeraBear]

Hey... yea! Fuck those companies and peddling those fucking stupid standards upon small breasted beauties everywhere! It's no wonder why so many of us are so fucked up in the head over this stuff!! Natural, unenhanced "as they are" booblets are fucking awesomesauce!!! Fuckity fuck fuck fuck!!! .......... *phew* ..... sorry. All this profanity in the forum lately has been... inspiring.

[karategrrl]

Oh my god, Karategrrl, I just fuckin' love you!!!!! (((((((hugs!)))))))

I love you MORE! XXXOOO

[strongirl]

Oh my god, Karategrrl, I just fuckin' love you!!!!! (((((((hugs!)))))))

[karategrrl]

Skindeep, nope, nothing wrong with wanting to show off your hot booblets AS THEY ARE! I, too, am frustrated by this BS of all the fucking padding. I once was ordering Victoria's Secret shit via phone and the sales rep kept trying to interest me in all these fucking bras, none of which, of course, came in an A cup. I kept saying, "uh, that one doesn't come in my size," "Nope, that one doesn't either..." until I was thinking, WTF lady, are you that dense?? Finally, I said, "Look, I wear an A cup and VS doesn't carry any. You DON'T HAVE ANY BRAS THAT FIT ME." We finally wrapped up the order. (They may now carry a few A cuppers. Not sure.)

But anyhoo, I HAD to share this story with you. Last night, I went to my local DSW to look for shoes. Spotted a dumbass sticker on the window of a car owned by one whom who I assume to be a dumbass. Hotrod-yellow man-car, shit dangling from the rearview mirrow. Sticker said, "I <heart> BOOBIES!" Ew. How fucking juvenile-typical.

Now, I may be totally wrong in ALL my assumptions, but I was picturing a young white male with a conditioned preoccupation with fake tits, Playboy and strippers. My response? I left a note on his windshield that said, "I <heart> COCKIES!"

Now, maybe I all I did was confuse the fuck out of someone. But whatever--I had fun, and I did something except sit there stewing at this <probable> asshat's need to profess his love of large female breasts. I imagine his bird-of-a-feather asshat friends seeing the sticker and going, "Yeah, man, hurr hurr hurr...me too, hurr hurr!" Maybe he likes small ones, who knows? Maybe the driver is really a female??? If not, I get great pleasure imagining him now confused, mentioning my note from now on whenever anyone comments on the sticker.

Hope I have inspired you all!

[strongirl]

"Is it wrong to actually enjoy having small breasts and wanting to show them off?"

No, it's not wrong, it's very right, and don't let the stupidity stop you from enjoying and sharing your body! I won't if you won't! Deal-io?

[skindeep1991]

Hello all!!....I am here today to write about something breast related I've come across that really pissed me off.
I've recently got paid so I decided to treat myself and buy some new bras. Now I was searching for something lacy and pretty, You know quite feminine. Anyway there's the option to search bras by size so I typed in A and then all of a sudden the options were narrowed down to a page full of 'Cleavage enhancing, Ultra padded' Push up bras. Now I don't mean to be picky but WTF!? talk about trying to put girls down, I just wanted something sexy and the options were all basically telling me 'your boobs are too small make them bigger' NO THANK YOU! what is wrong with people? Is it wrong to actually enjoy having small breasts and wanting to show them off?
Fuck society and there ideals of beauty and stupid companies that try to convince you that actually you need extra padding if your breasts don't fit there ideal of beauty!...

This made me even more angry as the website I was on was a well known designer that tries to encourage confident women no matter what size and that was the last place I expected for this to happen.

Sorry for the rant I just wanted to express my annoyance with yet another thing that lets us ladies down.

[anarch]

Sorry to report that I ordered that swimsuit and had to return it. Looked good, but no way I could have swum in it, or in fact done anything in it besides lounge on a beach towel in one position, being VERY VERY careful about changing positions because damn, that thing did not feel like it was going to stay put where it was supposed to.

Sigh. I'd love to hear about women who've been able to make it work, though.

I ended up ordering a "minimal" coverage bikini that worked very well for swimming AND lounging.

DeeRayyy, thanks for reporting on your Dodson experience. I loved reading it. Thanks for the VS model pics too. Nice to see them au naturel instead of all conforming to artificial beauty standards.

[discowombat]

On the small boobie positive side, there's a pic in the current sale catalog of a leopard print swimsuit where the top part is an X that goes across the model's titties. The model is very small breasted and holding her arms up over her head in a way that emphasizes her LACK of cleavage in a totally sexy way. I loved it!

Found it! http://www.victoriassecret.com/ss/Satellit...name=vsdWrapper Daaaaaaaaaaamn!

[discowombat]

Not only are they squeezed up in padded push-up bra's, they are airbrushed! There was one photo in the catalog recently where the poor model's belly button was over on her hip - oops! On the small boobie positive side, there's a pic in the current sale catalog of a leopard print swimsuit where the top part is an X that goes across the model's titties.

I went to the website to look at the hot swimsuit you described and instead came across this on accident http://www.victoriassecret.com/ss/Satellit...name=vsdWrapper The photoshopping they did on her chesticles looks very... odd. I'm sure she's way better au natural!