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> Pregnancy - all things good, bad, and otherwise
Fookie
post Aug 5 2011, 04:59 PM
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Christine, first ... my god ... such short mat-leave sad.gif
Do a google search for an article about breastfeeding in The Atlantic a few years ago. The author takes a very close look at research that was published in the 1970s and has since been disproved but remains the focus of many breast feeding advocates. The author, in the end, breast feeds anyway, this is by no means an anti-breastfeeding piece, but it did alleviate some of the sadness I felt about babyFookie and his breast-milk free life. If I could have breast fed, I would have. No question. However, the pressure on women to breastfeed has, I agree with Zelda, gotten a bit nutty. Happy mom = happy baby. The End.

BabyF is happy, healthy, smart as hell, and is coming up to 18 months with only one ear infection (and I suspect that has more to do with the amount of time he spends with his head under water at pools and lakes etc. than a lack of breast milk).

Don't worry about this. Do what works for your family.
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Cristine
post Aug 5 2011, 09:50 AM
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Thanks Zelda, you're absolutely right, I could definitely benefit from some breastfeeding classes/ consultations. I'm notorious for worrying way too far in advance about the what-if's! And neither me or my husband were breastfed, yet we're alive and healthy! wink.gif
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zelda
post Aug 4 2011, 09:35 PM
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Cristine, I think the best think you could do for now is try not to worry. Easier said than done, but right now you should focus on getting a reasonable amount of info to prepare.

For example, sign up for a BFing class or a session with a lactation consultant. I did that, and I learned about the different holds. It was very helpful when the time came (although nothing can compare with the real deal of actually nursing!)

I had an overabundance of milk for which I am grateful, but I have known women who struggled with supply issues even when everything should have worked out perfectly.

If this happens to you and you have to supplement with formula or even (worst case scenario) you end up bottle-feeding....IT WILL BE OKAY!!!!!

Listen, BFing is a wonderful thing, and I'm glad I was able to BF Elliott for almost a year (although I started supplementing with formula at 3 months when I went back to work). But you know what? There is a lot of HEAVY duty pressure on new moms these days to BF at all costs. Frankly, I think the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction, and I have been shocked at (speaking candidly) some of the almost women-hating attitudes I have found among some serious lactivists. (Not ALL lactivists...but some.)

I had a friend with high blood pressure who had to be on meds that prevented her from BFing...so she exclusively formula fed. And you know what? The sky didn't fall on her or her baby.

Do what's best for you, your baby, and your family. But remember that no matter what, your dear baby is going to get fed....maybe exclusively breast milk, maybe breast milk and some formula, whatever...but it will be OKAY.
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Cristine
post Aug 3 2011, 02:36 PM
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Hello to all of the nursing mommies, a friend of mine just scared me and said she had to supplement breastmilk with formula until her baby was 4 weeks because she didn't fully start flowing until then. I only get 6 weeks of maternity leave so I was planning on being a milking machine during that whole time! What are everyone else's experiences in that department? I gotta start asking around.

Hope everyone is well!
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KeraBear
post Aug 1 2011, 05:58 PM
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Hello ladies!!! i do not usually post here and hope not to have a reason to in the near future. i am only 18 and about to start my freshman year of college, ha ha. I can't imagine doing college and trying to raise a kid at the same time, so major props to those of you who have. Anyways, funny story to share! i had a dream last night that i was pregnant. And it felt sooooo real like i could just literally feel this living thing in my tummy. It was so wild. Then I woke up... and found my cat sleeping on my stomach. How funny is that? lol!
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Michelina
post Jul 16 2011, 04:48 PM
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Congrats, Laurenzorro! I'm so happy for you! You must be due around the same time of year I was due. What is your due date?

And yay for being in the second tri, Cristine! Doesn't it feel great to reach that milestone? Just wait until you start feeling kicks!

And congrats also to you, Divala. It is completely understandable how you are feeling about your pregnancy. I was initially pregnant with twins (IVF pregnancy so we knew it was highly possible), and I have to admit that I felt some relief when I found out that only one baby had made it past 8 weeks. I know that it sounds awful, which is why I wouldn't admit that to just anyone. Yes, I felt a loss, and I sometimes still feel sad about the baby we lost, but an even larger part of me was okay with it, even glad that it turned out that way. Having twins is scary - both in pregnancy, and then after the birth. There are definite advantages too, but the constant cheerleading about how wonderful it will be, must get tiring, because it will not feel "wonderful" at all times. Many people don't even realize that there are higher risks in pregnancy for someone carrying twins. I am glad you found this thread and you can share your feelings in a place where you won't be judged.

Makenna is 4 months old tomorrow and is doing very well. She doesn't sleep through the night anymore, but we have been co-sleeping lately, which has made life and sleep much easier. I love waking up to her smiles and coos.
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Cristine
post Jul 12 2011, 03:23 PM
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Thanks Julie! Congratulations Lauren!!

I am 13 weeks along, I had my last exam a week ago and could clearly see the baby's fingers! This time the doctor gave me a DVD, which I've surprisingly only watched a few times. Still have all my 1st tri symptoms. sad.gif That's it for now...

Take care ladies.
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julie124
post Jul 8 2011, 11:01 PM
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Wow, so much good news on here!

Catsoup, I feel for you on the cluster feedings! Hang in there, it will get easier and/or you'll learn to cope on less sleep. Oh, and newborns are SUPER noisy. What's weird is when they get older and a little quieter and you find yourself putting your hand on them to make sure they're still breathing. (For me, not tonight - Henry has a cold so he keeps waking himself up sniffling, poor little dude.)

Cristine, sounds like things are humming along....thinking good thoughts for you and baby! And yeah, the early weeks I remember feeling like I didn't really even feel pregnant. Don't worry, there's plenty of time to feel pregnant. smile.gif

Laurenzorro, congrats, how exciting! Thinking good thoughts for you and baby too!

Divala, congrats on the twins! That is so wonderful. One of my good friends from college had identical twin girls, similar deal to yours. She did end up delivering several weeks early, but the girls are three now and developmentally right on target. One thing she did find annoying (understandably): when people learned she was carrying twins she had a number of nosy people who either assumed that she had taken fertility drugs or wanted to know "so are they natural, or what?" People say the rudest things to pregnant women!

It sounds like Catsoup has the 411 on a lot of great local resources. Another reason to check out the moms of multiples groups is that a lot of those clubs have their own consignment sales (with two of everything!) and/or equipment or clothing swaps.

Don't worry too much about not knowing what you're doing - get as educated as you can before the kiddos arrive, but as I told a friend of mine recently, the thing they never tell you is that until the baby arrives, nobody really knows anything about being a mom or dad. The people who think they know - they don't. There's a lot of improv involved and a lot of figuring out what works for you. That said, other people (relatives or friends) who have kids and whose parenting styles seem in tune with what you want for your own are great resources.

One thing I've learned is that it's OK to be dumb. I felt like such an idiot in a lot of those early days - all the books say things like, "you know your baby best, you are the expert on your baby" and I was like, "I don't know JACK! I am a complete dumbass! I can't read my baby's signals at all!" With support, you figure it out.
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Laurenzorro
post Jul 8 2011, 05:16 AM
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Hey everyone!

It's been a long time since I visited this board since I decided to not focus as much attention on gettin preggers....


and now I'm back and 5 weeks along!! Just found out yesterday, had first round of blood tests this morning....amazed at how different I feel already! Keep pinching myself cause it's so unreal.

Have been bursting to tell someone so you ladies will tide me over for the time being!
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Cristine
post Jul 2 2011, 03:42 PM
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Yay Catsoup, congratulations!!!!! smile.gif

Michelina, I'm 12 weeks and I'm going in on Wednesday for my final ultrasound with the fertility doctor... then I'm switching to a regular OBGYN going forward. I will be taking a video home with me this time! smile.gif Same old symptoms, I can't wait to see if the 2nd tri will treat me better.

Most everyone in our families know now, and our friends are finding out one by one... no big Facebook announcements. Everyone is thrilled, which feels kinda weird cuz I don't even feel pregnant! I've been spending a lot of time with the kittens (they're 4 weeks now) and making sure that the runt in the litter is getting enough nourishment... poor guy hates a bottle. sad.gif

I hope everyone else is well!!

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catsoup
post Jul 1 2011, 03:06 PM
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Diva! Hello! Congrats on the wedding! I knew you were getting married this spring and hope everything went well! And congratulations on the pregnancy. I completely understand what you're feeling about the twins. Yes, it's exciting but holy shit, talk about overwhelming! At our first ultrasound, one of the first things I said (maybe even the first) was "there's only one in there, right?" because the idea of twins scared the beejeebus out of me. I will say you have plenty of time to get adjusted to the idea and plenty of time to learn about babies. I have no personal experience with multiples but I've heard that finding a multiples support group can be very helpful.

Since you're in the same place as me, I'm happy to make some local resource recommendations. smile.gif We took three classes at Amma Maternity in Edina and found them to be very helpful. My partner had never held a newborn (and barely held a baby of any age) and he's now changing more diapers than me and is a terrific parent already. There's a consignment sale thing called Just Between Friends that we went to (they happen in different 'burbs every months) and we got a ton of stuff (clothes, toys, gear) for fairly cheap. I found Bellies to Babies consignment in Richfield to be okay for maternity clothes shopping, as is the one in Hopkins (can't think of the name). I also found a lot of my maternity clothes at Kohl's (and I'm not a Kohl's fan usually). Please let me know if there's anything else locally you are looking for. I'm happy to share my experience.

We are doing pretty well and adjusting to live with Baby G. I'm exhausted a lot of the time (of course) and still fairly emotional, although both have toned down some in the last couple days, thank goodness. She likes to cluster feed, especially between 1am-4am and that has made for a few mommy meltdowns. Last night she did not cluster feed and that was wonderful. We're having her sleep in our room and we're both having a tough time sleeping through all her noises. Who knew newborn sleep was so damn noisy?

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reds88
post Jul 1 2011, 01:17 PM
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QUOTE(Cristine @ May 10 2011, 08:09 AM) *
Please tell me that no positive is ever too light! I got a positive today at 15 dpiui and I'm trying not to get too excited since it is way early! Of course, the one time I buy cheap generic tests is the time I get a positive... and I really hope it's reliable! I'll keep you posted.

my advice is to wait few more days... then you will be sure.


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Divala
post Jul 1 2011, 12:46 PM
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Hi, everyone, and congrats to all the new moms and moms-to-be! I really need to come around these parts more. I had no idea Catsoup was even pregnant!

As it turns out, I'm 11 weeks along with mine, and they're going to be identical twins. The Giant pretty much nailed it on the first shot after we got married in April, and then my egg had to go and divide itself, so now we're having 2. I wasn't on any fertility meds, either, but apparently twins ran on my mom's side of the family many generations back (all dead and gone before I was born). Sure, we're happy and everything, and in a good position to have kids, but I'm still trying to get over the shock of having twins. That's not something you plan for. We would've liked to have the choice to have more than one, ideally we'd have one of each if we had 2, but I guess this means that, as long as 2 healthy babies come out of me, I never have to be pregnant again. 2 kids is our absolute limit. So if it's true that twins deliver 3-4 weeks earlier than single pregnancies, I'm going to be due mid-late December. I just hope it's not on the 24th or 25th. I was born on a holiday and it sucks. I don't want to do that to my kids, who'll already have to share a birthday with each other.

I'm having a ton of ultrasounds done, since I'm in a higher risk category because of the twins, my age, and the twins sharing a placenta. Not to mention that I'm not exactly in the best of physical shape to begin with.

I'm really glad I stumbled on this thread. I'm hoping you guys can be real with me and not all "hooray, more babies for everyone!" The fact is that I'm scared to death. I've never changed a diaper or prepared a bottle, or anything besides occasionally feed my neices or nephew - and neither has the Giant. And what if they've got developmental issues? I'm in awe of any parent who has the strength and patience to raise a child with any developmental issues, but I don't know that I have the patience for it myself, especially with two of them. The only response I've gotten to any of my concerns is "oh, you'll know exactly what to do when they're born." Like I'm going to somehow magically have any kid of maternal skills. I don't know, it just kind of gets me how everyone is SO EXCITED about it, but they're not any of the people who will have to do any of the work once they're here. My parents are over the moon about it, which I'm actually okay with because they've committed to babysitting at least 2-3 times a week. It's just everyone else who seem to think I'm more excited than I am forcing me to be all squeally about it are really getting on my nerves. Yes, the Giant and I are excited, but we're also scared, overwhelmed, and a plethora of other emotions. Our life is going to change forever in 6 months, and it's really hard to get used to the fact that I won't be able to come and go as I please and spend money on the stupid shit that I've gotten used to, and other people depending on me and my lack of ability.

Thanks for letting me vent. I haven't been around Bust much lately, but I've always really liked everyone's badass realness. YOU are the kind of moms I want to associate with.


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"After all those hours of concentrated effort, I come home pure as the driven snow." -Gidget
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Michelina
post Jul 1 2011, 11:02 AM
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Speaking of names, I giggled when Catsoup mentioned using the name Zelda because I remembered that you had considered using it, Zelda. Mr M and I actually were considering using Elliott for a boy. It's a fantastic name too!
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Michelina
post Jul 1 2011, 10:59 AM
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Yay!!! Congratulations, Catsoup! And yes, fortunately she waited until the move was over and not just days before! Enjoy your little bundle and take care of yourself too! (I know, easier said than done....) :-)

Cristine, so happy to hear your 10-week ultrasound was great! I couldn't believe how clearly the baby could be seen at that point. Truly amazing. You must be just about 12 weeks now! How are you feeling?
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zelda
post Jun 30 2011, 05:00 PM
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Congrats, catsoup! SO happy for you all! Wow, an early surprise. Better than going overdue, I think. :-)

The name Zelda is up for grabs, y'all! ;-)
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Fookie
post Jun 30 2011, 04:19 PM
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Catsoup YAYYYYYYYYYY!
Welcome babycatsoup.
Glad everyone's doing well and baby waited until after you had moved!!!

Giant hugs to you. So happy.
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julie124
post Jun 28 2011, 09:19 PM
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Hooray, baby Catsoup! And congrats Catsoup and Mr. C! Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy....will love to hear all about it when you catch your breath.

And yes, they come when they wanna come, eh?

(love and hugs to mama Catsoup!)
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aphelendra
post Jun 26 2011, 09:07 AM
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Congratamulations baby Catsoup!

Can't wait to hear more!
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catsoup
post Jun 25 2011, 08:06 PM
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The baby was born Monday (much to our surprise since I was only 37 weeks and we had just moved into our new house two days before)! She's doing well, I'm doing well, and Daddy is doing well. She has jaundice and has to be in a light therapy bed at home for the next couple days (hopefully will be done Monday) but we're all doing well.

More later. Hope you all are well.

Oh and we did not use the name Zelda. laugh.gif
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