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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
neurotic.nelly
post Dec 10 2008, 11:40 AM
Post #2801


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Posts: 460
From: the galatic center


ailurophile, i think your reaction was appropriate. imo, he has no filter, and just blurted it out. so, in that instance of complete disregard for you and your feelings, your filter dropped and you questioned his attachment to his balls, and rightly so.

after hearing what you ladies have gone through with your boyfriends, i am so grateful for my current boyfriend, and the ones from the past. they never ever made me feel inadequate about my beautiful little ones. and if they would have ever made me feel less than for having less than, i would've snatched up a nut and kicked them to the curb.

i love my breasts. i love love love having smaller breasts.
~nn


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Earth: A Satanically ran planet where 98% of it's inhabitants are unquestioning, conformist idiots who are totally controlled and manipulated by the Satanic governments of the world and have been made complacent by said governments, through rigorous brainwashing.
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ailurophile
post Dec 10 2008, 11:22 AM
Post #2802


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I have been only "lurking" these past few weeks. I have had so much to say yet not enough time as I have been sooo busy with the holidays coming. But my Christmas shopping is done!!! Those of you who celebrate Christmas may be able to appreciate that. I have to catch up on the past few days here though. I've only been skimming and there's some good stuff I can certainly relate to and would like to comment on. Not to change the subject but I have a complaint about my bf:

My new bf (of close to 5 months now. met him just before you girls) pissed me off the other night. We have not fought yet about anything. But I had to let him know that what he did bothered me and he's not the communicative type so it's not like I could "discuss my feelings". We were watching TV and there was a commercial kind of interview thing on with volumptuous girls, already large breasted girls with additional padding and underwires, and little sexy panties, the Victoria Secret looking type girls. We were talking and they came on the TV and his eyes bugged out and he said "Whoah!!!" I said "Whoah?????" He's like , "Yeah" I said, "You wanna lose a nut??" It just came out. I didn't even think first. He said "Why? What's wrong with that??" I just gave him a look like I didn't appreciate that and he dropped it. Was I out of line??? Because if they were 32 barely B's with a little pot bellies, he would not have said, "Whoah!!!" How should I have felt when he stopped mid-sentence to exclaim his instant excitement over these well-endowed, perfectly shaped women?? I am a fairly new girlfriend still in the impressionable stages. How does he think I felt??? I hope he got the point that that was inappropriate. I am the jealous type as it is, which I am working on and do not show my jealousy around him but I'm sorry...that was inappropriate!!!!! If he wants to look or exclaim to his friends....whatever! ....but I don't want to hear it! Am I overreacting??


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I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It's not. Mine had me trained in two days. ~Bill Dana

Sat Nam...
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karategrrl
post Dec 10 2008, 09:20 AM
Post #2803


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Posts: 714


strongirl:
I could have written your post myself (about the porn issue). Thanks for articulating perfectly what I feel I was saying rather clumsily. I, too, hate the fake stuff mostly because there are guys out there who think it's really real. I speak from personal experience: My ex (the sexually dysfunctional, porn-obessed one) was always comparing me to the porn girls--which, according to the crap he liked, were all busty, sex-craving nymphos who supposedly took it up the butt all the time, came in .2 nanoseconds and were into threesomes, fivesomes, forced sex, whatever...whenever...wherever...so, because--Goddess forbid--I wasn't that extreme, I was "frigid." There are a lot of fucked up people out there... (And if any of you are wondering why on earth I tolerated that, he was my first bf--I had no other point of reference. If I ran into him now I'd probably spontaneously slap the shit out of him.)

crinoline:
LOL about the kick in the balls comment! Bwahahahahahaha! I almost choked on my coffee reading that! laugh.gif

About lingerie: yep, chemises, tank styles and camisoles are made for us!!! We don't need any "support," so we can choose these very pretty styles.

You girls who have the lingerie that's too big in the bust:
Maybe try taking it to a seamstress or someone who can sew well--maybe they can adjust the cups?? Just a thought.

My best lingerie story: Several Christmases ago, my man (now my ex) and my friend conspired and went shopping for me at Victoria's Secret. He knew she had great fashion style and understood my body type. (I have to say he also carried around my measurements on a little card in his wallet. The sales girls were always impressed when he'd whip that out instead of saying, "Duh, I don't know what size she wears.")

Anyhoo, I got two sets of gorgeous lingerie that year. I opened it up and was instantly overcome with grief, thinking, "Oh my god, this is all SOO beautiful, but it will NEVER fit my breasts!" But, shockingly, one of them fit my bust perfectly and the other one was very close--I put little pads in the top and it was fine. I felt like a million bucks wearing that stuff, and still do! wink.gif
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lightchested
post Dec 10 2008, 06:42 AM
Post #2804


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Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


Stronggirl and Crinoline, I really appreciate your comments. Though I doubt I'll kick my husband in the balls for wanting to buy me "the gift that keeps on giving"...a.k.a. the gift of serial surgeries to last a lifetime (initial surgery + repairs & replacements), I must admit I was a bit shocked that after telling him profusely that I was not interested in his surgical display of love. that he, days after my refusal to submit to becoming a Bolt-On, brought the topic up AGAIN.

The second time he brought it up, we were in the car. He said, "If I buy you boobs for Christmas, you'd better get them" (so he wouldn't waste his money on a procedure/mutilation & not getting his money's worth). I told him firmly, "Then don't buy them." We drove on in silence for a bit after that.

Stronggirl, to your point, you're right. Thank you for the reminder. As stupid as it sounds, I do often think of myself as "boobless". But you're right. I do wear a bra, and I "couldn't" go braless in public without feeling extremely awkward, so you're right. It's not like I don't have boobs. It's just that I don't feel like I have the boobs I "should" have, which is the issue that I really need to address. (Obliterating the "should" in my mind, rather than trying to turn my boobs into "that pair").

Boobs are a journey. I'm trying to enjoy the ride. This site makes it easier. I am so grateful that this board exists.


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May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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strongirl
post Dec 9 2008, 11:40 PM
Post #2805


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Posts: 295


On the porn issue, wow, it sure is a complicated topic. I have been an anti-porn activist. I have also masturbated to porn and enjoyed sex with my bf while we enjoy porn together. This ain't no easy issue.

There's porn and then there's porn. I'm totally with Nellie that the more natural the better - in terms of boobs, action, and responses from the participants. The worst porn for me has fake boobs and fake arousal/orgasms from the women. That sort always pisses me off like crazy. It's ugly, exploitive, and I can't relate to anyone that gets off on it.

But nowadays there's lots of good stuff out there, in my opinion. Betty Dodson is one of my personal heroes for her work on making sexuality in a wide variety of forms acceptable. Her thoughts on the topic are well worth researching for any of you who are not familiar.

I am a strong advocate for full, joyous, generous sex lives for everyone. So when porn promotes that, I like it. When it causes pain and suffering and the retreat from a person's own sexuality, I hate it.
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strongirl
post Dec 9 2008, 11:30 PM
Post #2806


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Posts: 295


lightchested...may I point out that it makes no sense for your guy to get you boobs for Christmas because you already HAVE boobs.
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Vendetta
post Dec 9 2008, 06:56 PM
Post #2807


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Posts: 182


my bf got me lingerie for christmas 2 years ago, he bought a corset with matching panties at Intimissimi. I believe it is size 1 or something since he asked for the smallest size available. It's just slightly padded and it doesn't fit me at all, it remains with just two empty cups. It's beautiful but I only wore it once. So it was the first and the last time I got lingerie for present.
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crinoline
post Dec 9 2008, 06:45 PM
Post #2808


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Posts: 622
From: Deep South, U.S.A.


lightchested - my husband would get a kick in the balls that Christmas!! Good for you, you don't need them!

starship - What about a chemise? If you know whether you're a small or xsmall, then it would be easy for the bf to get something sexy that would fit
like
this
or
this

yeah, my boy once got me a beautiful silk lingerie set (that I had picked out) and I've never been able to wear it, because the cups remain empty when I put it on. I was waaay too hopeful that their 32B (the smallest size they made) would fit my 32A frame. BUT he's had great success with silky nighties, rompers, or cami sets!


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http://www.etsy.com/shop/crinolinecreations Handmade accessories for the SuperCute!
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lightchested
post Dec 9 2008, 04:17 PM
Post #2809


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Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


My husband wants to get me boobs for Christmas. That's my Christmas story. I keep telling him no. He's not a bad guy...he's doing it so I'll stop obsessing about them. But that's not the way I want to resolve my obsession so I keep telling him no.


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May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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starship
post Dec 9 2008, 03:16 PM
Post #2810


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Posts: 366


i think its almost inevitable that most guys will watch porn at least a little bit. i dont mind as long as its not excessive and if its always the same sort of women (i.e big boobed 'perfect' model type ones) then i get kinda insecure and annoyed about it. It's one thing that makes me wish the internet wasnt invented- i could easily deal with a couple of magazines/dvds stashed under the bed but a whole WWW worth or porn is abit argh. if i was to find a bf looking at porn containing all sorts/types of natural looking ladies though i dont think id have a problem with it, even if it was quite frequently. itd be reassauring in some ways

i dunno why the big boobed busties (well, the one quoted) have to use us as a negative comparison. i think ive acknowledged before how the topics of convo are so different in the two forums but not with quite the same tone...

I was in john lewis the other day looking for xmas prezzies and noticed they had quite a few bras stocked in AA & A sizes. mostly plain ones but still means theres one more shop on the list of places i can actually buy bras

i bought a gorgeous new lepel bra from an ebay shop that arrived today. it's lacey, pink and completelyyy unpadded!!! usually i have trouble finding those sort of bras in a size that actually fits snuggly so im pretty happy about my find:).

hi lightchested! yeah this is kind of like one big continuing conversation rather than smaller, more particular ones like you might find on other websites. keep posting:)

As its coming up to christmas- Has anyone got any stories about receiving lingerie gifts? i know it can be quite a traditional present from bfs but id hate the idea! Itd be pretty impossible for them to get the right size and even then it might not fit me/wouldnt be flattering so id feel uncomfortable. Id love if i was a Bcup so my bf could easily just go into a store and pick up something sexy he'd like to see me in:(
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karategrrl
post Dec 9 2008, 09:46 AM
Post #2811


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Posts: 714


Yes, neurotic Nelly, you understood my meaning in what I posted about porn. No, jacking off to porn is not cheating, technically. But, like you said, anything done to the extreme can be detrimental to aspects of life--it's a matter of balance.

I speak from personal experience about the porn, as I've been with people who COULDN'T get off unless there was porn involved--a real woman (such as me) wasn't enough. So no, the pictures/movies, etc. do not themselves destroy relationships--people who are obsessed with porn do. And the ease with which one can access tons of porn, of any kind and suiting any taste--from Playboy-type stuff to downright tasteless and grotesque stuff--makes it easy for many people to form an obsession with it. In some ways it can be..how should I say...educational... wink.gif but in the grandest scheme of things I think it does more harm than good. But it doesn't matter--porn has always existed in some form or other and always will, I think--I mean, cavemen drew cave art with people fucking and stuff.


Topic change:
As for the large-busted women saying their thread has absolutely nothing to do with men, I disagree. We all form our opinions of ourselves, to some extent, based on feedback from other people, men included. If we all lived in vacuums, we'd never grow or have anything to experience, good or bad.

Am I the only one who sense a tad of pride in that comment, "Well, no shit Sherlock. That ain't the fuckin' point. What goes on in here isn't about finding/keeping a man." No, that's not what it's all about. "
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lightchested
post Dec 9 2008, 07:57 AM
Post #2812


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Posts: 42
From: Detroit, Michigan


I have no idea if I am doing this right...I couldn't do a new thread. Are we supposed to keep replying to each other even if we are not actually replying to a previous post?

I've been reading this forum for months to get me through very hard times, so first off, I want to say thank you to you all. I love how having small breasts has become almost a feminist issue on this site. It gives me new directions to go in to deal with my smallies...I think I'm going to re-read The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf for more inspiration in dealing with this "affliction" (this is a joke, to do with the link I posted below).

The reason I decided to post today is to show you all an article that went up on the web over a month ago. I don't know if you've already seen it, so I apologize if it's already been posted. I am usually VERY sensitive about my smallness, but even I had to laugh at this article. I hope it does not offend anyone: the author is not making fun of small breastedness, but at the industry that makes us believe there is anything wrong with it.

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/plast...eneral_warns_of


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May visible pyramids one day lurk beneath my sweaters.
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neurotic.nelly
post Dec 9 2008, 02:56 AM
Post #2813


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Posts: 460
From: the galatic center


I think that anything can be detrimental to a relationship if it becomes an obsession or addiction i.e. shopping, or working too much. I think the same can be applied to porn. I do not look at the sites with the too "perfect" women and/or men. I hate those sites. I like the more amateur stuff, and real orgasms. My boyfriend and I have boundaries around the stuff, and it works out just fine for us. No jealousy, and healthy sex lives. But, it definitely isn't for everyone. It's understandable.
Betty Dodson recommends porn to help women feel more confident about the differing size and shape of their vajayjays, and I apply the same practice to viewing smaller busted women get down and dirty. So, femininity definitely does not come from the size of your boobs, and I know because I just saw it, and she was hot.

my 2 cents. peace.


--------------------
Earth: A Satanically ran planet where 98% of it's inhabitants are unquestioning, conformist idiots who are totally controlled and manipulated by the Satanic governments of the world and have been made complacent by said governments, through rigorous brainwashing.
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loonydaray
post Dec 9 2008, 12:38 AM
Post #2814


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Posts: 45


okay vendetta i get it now
i went to lurk in the large breast forum today and was reading about it so yeah

but seriously i have something to vent
i was on some random internet websurf last night and stumbled upon some guys comment in which he extremely dissed those of us with miniboobies, calling us disgusting little boys
what.the.fuck.
and then i was lurking in the large breast forum and found this freak who was trying his best to cheer up our largebreasted sisters (and failing rather miserably) and HE in the process mentioned how he the little boy figure didn't do anything for him
which, w.t.f. is his problem? here he is trying to convince those girls that their boob size is just right because life isn't about boob size, and then turns around and says that small-boobies make us look like little boys??? hypocrite much??
excuse the vent but those two are just pissing me off
do we look like little boys? hell no! so how the hell can small boobs make us into little boy figures?
that is the stupidest, most annoying idea i've ever heard
yeah i've heard these body types called little boyish
but to hear someone be so turned off by that??
if blood could really boil because of anger i'd be in a lot of pain right now
some guys are just dickheads
plain and straight
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loonydaray
post Dec 8 2008, 06:15 PM
Post #2815


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karategrrl i know exactly how you feel! thankyou for agreeing with me i hate feeling like the only prude too

and vendetta i'm not sure exactly what she is talking about in that post?
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Vendetta
post Dec 8 2008, 05:22 PM
Post #2816


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I don't lurk at the large thread but I did it today:



I know the lil' gals thread has some bitching to the effect that they don't dig their mates interest in big boobs because it makes them feel insecure, but um, not us. I just find it galling that he obviously didn't take the time to read & he seems to think this thread is about our lack of mates/dates, whatever. 'There are lots of guys out there will love you for you!' Well, no shit Sherlock. That ain't the fuckin' point. What goes on in here isn't about finding/keeping a man. It's purely NOT. It's more about, "Where can I find a sexy EEE bra?" or "Some creep on the street made me feel really marginalized today" or "I caught sight of my tits in the gym today & realized how awesome they are!" or "Has anybody tried this sports bra?" It has very little to do with love or relationships or MEN & their opinions on breast size.
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Aithinne
post Dec 8 2008, 05:05 PM
Post #2817


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Posts: 211
From: USA


mynameislala, Welcome! I know exactly how you feel, along with everyone else here, I'm sure. It's almost like you feel stuck and don't know what to do, or what the reality of attraction really is. You're always wondering, "is it really true that men are only attracted to perfect women?" It's a struggle to feel confusion and anger at a culture and men that seem to reject you flat out because of some feature that you were born with. But at the end of the day, I think it is true that there are some genuine people out there, even if they are more quiet than the loud small-breast haters. I don't know how many positive words I can offer about men, since I'm also struggling to believe that there are actually men out there that would want someone like me. But it does help to come here to this website and read about women who have men that love their bodies and them as people. It certainly gives those of us who are still struggling some hope.

Good luck, and try to think positive about yourself. I know it's really hard to change your way of thinking about yourself, but try anyway. I think you'll feel better. I try to think about all the small-breasted women I know who are confident and have men that love them and think they're totally hot. If it can exist for one woman, why not for another? Why not for you and me? Just knowing that there are some men in the world who go against our stereotypes about them is very comforting and helps a lot in those times where you start to doubt their existence.
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Vendetta
post Dec 8 2008, 02:53 PM
Post #2818


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Why would you care that much about those "beauty" standards? You should look at yourself instead of looking at those women. Do you feel the need to have bigger breasts because those men love them? I don't get it, I'm sorry.
We all live our daily lifes being real and dealing with real people. I've said this once here and I'll say it again. I can understand someone who wants some breasts because she feels they're gonna make her feel okay but cannot understand someone who's just trying to fit into society molds and in my opinion, that is related to men. And no, wanting breasts "for yourself" isn't a myth, there are people who don't care about society standards and still dream about a slightly bigger chest, "for themselves". Is it fitting that important, really?

And I don't agree porn is a way of "cheating", I believe insecurity makes women hate porn. I've been on both sides so it's just my opinion.
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mynameislala
post Dec 8 2008, 01:14 PM
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Yeah, I think that's because we're a country that from the beginning has no true identity - considering we were ruled by Spain for centuries. But still, it's weird because Brazil was ruled by Portugal for a long time too, and from what I've seen they're a lot more diverse in their culture. They're more tolerant, etc. Sure, they are the Mecca of plastic surgery but in other cultural aspects they seem to be more aunthentic than us (for example, music... here in Chile, these last few years, the only music you hear in clubs or parties is reggaeton. No pop, nor electronica, salsa, whatever... just reggaeton). It's said that my country is like a sponge for new trends. However, we take everything to the extreme, which is why I think guys here just love implants and why young girls are, err... "easier" everyday. Really, 14 year olds record themselves giving oral sex to their classmates using their cell phones and upload that stuff online.

On porn... the thing that bothers me the most about porn is the fact that everyone is so "perfect" and trashy. Women have huge breasts, tiny waists, they are toned, tanned. And I think porn is also detrimental to men's self image. Every guy I know would like to have a bigger penis. Practically all guys think that size matters. But maybe if they didn't watch so much porn the wouldn't think this. I don't know many women who have actually been with a guy with a 10 in. penis. None actually. And I don't know any woman who would want to. I believe it'd hurt or maybe it'd be a waste. Especially since I'm a clit girl. But men continue to believe this because they watch the male porn stars and the females moaning the moment the guy goes in, and they think that they need a larger "manhood" as they call it. It's stupid and pathetic really. Why should sex be more enjoyable just because a female has horrible implants or a man has a longer penis? It's stupid, yet men continue to believe the myth.

I hate these standards of beauty. I think we would all be happier if no one had ever thought that beauty meant 36-24-36. BS to that though, but, when will the rest of the world (especially men) learn?
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karategrrl
post Dec 8 2008, 12:44 PM
Post #2820


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QUOTE(loonydaray @ Dec 8 2008, 05:51 AM) *
it seems to me that too many problems arise from the porn industry
i know some chicks are okay with their guys looking at porn but i can't imagine why
why should they ogle(sp?) other women? why do they feel the need to?
i would feel cheated on if whatever guy i'm with looks at porn. what's the difference between him grabbing a boob or jerking off to pictures/videos of boobs? he'd still be having sexual thoughts about other women
and idk, i just think sex is something meant for two people
idk exactly how to say what i mean O.o

Thanks for posting this. Sometimes I feel like the only "prude" who thinks porn is really not the best thing in the world. Sure, I think most people have thoughts about people besides their partner at some time or other, but to really indulge in the fantasy, or especially to go to strip clubs, to get to the point where you're putting out a lot of sexual "energy," if you will, toward others, whether it be real people or pictures, is potentially deadly to a relationship. It destroys the sacredness of what you're supposed to share only with the other person. And many people think you haven't cheated until you've actually completed a sex act with someone else, but I think "cheating" can happen way before that point.

mynameisislala, welcome! I think I speak for many women here when I say I long for "small-B's" though, reading your post, I realize how tough it must be to live where you do--sounds like women's bodies and the whole breast size issue is just crazy over there. I thought America was tough. wink.gif
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