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> Frustrated Singles
sniggles
post Jul 7 2008, 01:04 PM
Post #261


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Posts: 14


HA!! As immature as this may be I usually just ignore all the ones that don't interest me. I just figure why waste my time... and so many guys can be such jerks when rejected. I thought the online dating thing would be easier, but it's really just as bad as real life.... you gotta weed through so many tools to meet anyone decent. This guy that messaged me didn't have a pic, which speaks volumes. And on his profile he describes himself as a "nice guy". wtf.
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geekchickknits
post Jul 7 2008, 11:46 AM
Post #262


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 319


QUOTE(sniggles @ Jul 6 2008, 04:04 PM) *
Has any online daters here had people send them insulting messages? I just don't understand why someone would do this.... I mean isn't the point to find a date? You really must have too much time on your hands if you feel the need to put someone down on an internet dating website. Normally something this stupid wouldn't bother me, I guess it just caught me off guard.


I've only had people send me insulting messages if I reject them without "getting to know them first". Um, I'm sorry. I thought we were in the casual sex section. The fact that you're shorter than me and over 50 isn't exactly turning me on.

And come on buddy......wouldn't you rather I be a shallow bitch than have me reject you on your own merits?

That's why I'm back on RL dating for now.
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sniggles
post Jul 6 2008, 01:47 PM
Post #263


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Posts: 14


Has any online daters here had people send them insulting messages? I just don't understand why someone would do this.... I mean isn't the point to find a date? You really must have too much time on your hands if you feel the need to put someone down on an internet dating website. Normally something this stupid wouldn't bother me, I guess it just caught me off guard.
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geekchickknits
post Jun 16 2008, 06:49 AM
Post #264


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Posts: 319


Thanks muffy - I hear that.

What also frustrates me is that a lot of the time, guys don't think I'm being genuine. The guy I was venting about did end up calling me, and we went to see a movie. Afterwards, I wanted him to come home with me, but he'd had a really long day and we went to see the last show of the night, so he was too tired and needed to go to sleep. I was disappointed, but I understood, so I said "that's ok". And then he kept asking me if I was mad, or rather telling me I was mad. All because I thanked him for taking me to the movie.

Weird.
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zoya
post Jun 16 2008, 06:40 AM
Post #265


uh huh.
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thanks Muffy -

I've just kinda found out that someone that I had something with last year and have been trying to build a friendship with, was not what I thought they were at all - or I should say partially they won't cop to what I know they were, and partially weren't that person at all. and that's a bummer, because it sucks to lose respect for someone you had respect for, especially when you know all their friends, and etc.

I actually have been doing good stuff for myself.... Spent the evening last night with a bunch of girlfriends.. I've got some great friends, who actually don't even know why I'm kinda funky right now, and don't give a shit. They just wanna hang out. and that's nice and comforting. I'm actually good about the sappy movies, don't really dig watching them when I'm in this mode - Sense and Sensibility is the one that I can't ever give up, though. I don't find it that sappy - actually the Marianne storyline is one that makes me feel a little better, considering.

anyway, this too shall pass.....
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Muffy
post Jun 16 2008, 06:08 AM
Post #266


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Posts: 217
From: Rhode Island


zoya, I'd been feeling mopey myself this past weekend because I kept waiting around for that phone call that never came. Try to do something good for yourself: go to the beach or hang out with friends that will cheer you up, that seemed to work for me. By the way, stop watching sappy movies, I promise you that never makes it better.


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zoya
post Jun 16 2008, 04:05 AM
Post #267


uh huh.
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muffy - ditto on that. I wish I could meet someone who just didn't keep me wondering. That I never had to wonder about their feelings or motives and could count on them.


I've kinda come to a place where I'm over the "I just want time to do my thing without anyone else." I'm getting pretty settled into my work, and life and I know that I'm not going to push that completely aside for someone - so I'm pretty ready to just meet someone. I'm so exhausted right now by the whole guy thing. When's it my turn to be that girl that some guy is so totally into that he'll move the earth for me, won't keep me guessing, and wants to stick it out with me - not running to the next thing? And how come I seem to meet the guys who aren't that for me, yet the very next girl they meet, they ARE into that way and able be that guy? Sometimes I feel like I'm the perennial transitional girl, and it feels like shit. There's so much about me that rocks, and yet no one seems able to - or cares to - want it.

I'm just feeling a wee bit mopey right now.... I was just watching the Emma Thompson movie of Sense and Sensibility - and I was saying to someone that I feel like Marianne right now.. I feel like I've just gone through a similar heart wrenching situaton, and all I want is an Alan Rickman at this point. (I'd take Alan Rickman.... wink.gif )

ugh
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Muffy
post Jun 15 2008, 09:54 PM
Post #268


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From: Rhode Island


geekchickknits, I feel your pain... been there am sort of there now.

Why can't the right person just show up on my doorstep, minus the bullshit, like phone tag or silly childish games. No guesswork - they're into me, they say it, act on it. Wouldn't that be great?


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geekchickknits
post Jun 14 2008, 11:32 AM
Post #269


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Posts: 319


I just need to vent......

I'm dating a couple of guys, and one of them....the more I see him the more I like him and want to spend more time with him. However, we're both kinda last minute people and he's been very hard to get a hold of recently. For example, his cell phone has run out of credits. I know he's going travelling soon, so is probably saving the money, and not worrying about buying more at this time - but it's still VERY frustrating. I do feel like I'm having to wait on him a little bit, which I really don't like.

And I'm horny as hell.
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Muffy
post Jun 8 2008, 07:52 PM
Post #270


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Posts: 217
From: Rhode Island


I met this girl that I think I kind of like, the funny thing is I'm not sure if we are currently dating or not, I don't know how I manage to get myself into these things. My friends have asked, I don't know I was okay with there not being any boundaries yet, I just met her - though none of my friends have yet to kiss me on the lips at the end of the night.

However, I think my best friend hates her. I brought her to a party, some of my friends met her, everything seemed really great. Everyone got along, which I always worry about. Until today when my best friend mentioned how chummy she is with his on again, off again BF, he seemed kind of pissed off about it. It upset me that he might not like her. Then later that day he asked how things were going with her?! I feel like I'm living in a soap opera!


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erinjane
post Jun 1 2008, 10:14 PM
Post #271


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From: Winnipeg


I just remembered, last night I was filling out one of those silly personality quiz's and it was pretty right on (except for the sexuality part which was waaaaaaaay off). One of the things it said was "You need someone who wants to be in a relationship, not someone who needs to be in a relationship to feel fulfilled". I thought that was just about the perfect way to describe who I'm looking for.

I have been thinking a lot about what I want lately because I really have no idea what I want. I'm having a great time being single and just having sex instead of a relationship, but I'm also very aware that I've never been out with anyone who completely knocked me off my socks. I think I'm sort of just waiting for that, but I'm not stressing about it all. I'm having fun while I wait, or while I wait to be ready to go out and really look for something serious. This is probably naive, but I think I'm just waiting until I happen to meet that special someone who's really going to wow me.



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I Could Tell You Stories That Would Make Your Ears Curl
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i_am_jan
post Jun 1 2008, 09:35 PM
Post #272


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Posts: 488
From: Columbus, Ohio


stargazer: Insecurity, yes. That's it exactly. Yes, I am a member of the socially inept thread. "Lackluster" relationship with a guy instead? No, not at all, I'm afraid that's where you're confused. My relationships with guys are good relationships, again, play fine with them when I find one where we can hang. Simply don't want to be with one now cuz I fear getting into something that might get serious, more than friends. Yes, it does get pretty confusing.
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erinjane
post Jun 1 2008, 07:22 PM
Post #273


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From: Winnipeg


That's how I feel Zoya. When people ask why I'm not in a relationship right now I tell them that I'm at a really selfish point in my life. I just want to indulge myself and not have to worry about someone else. I also had this kind of silly realization yesterday that I'm totally waiting for someone who loves me just as much as I love myself, and for someone I can love as much as I love myself.


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I Could Tell You Stories That Would Make Your Ears Curl
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zoya
post Jun 1 2008, 05:07 PM
Post #274


uh huh.
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I'm at the point where I know I'd like a relationship at some point, but I'm just into my own stuff right now. I have so much on my plate and this is such a transitional time for me, that it's just kind of all about me at the moment. Sometimes I think I'd like someone around to hang out with, but these days I think I'm probably better off without someone else, at least for now. Less headache and heartache and more time to do my thing.

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stargazer
post Jun 1 2008, 02:57 PM
Post #275


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um, jan, i'm confused. so, you would like have girls as friends, but insecurity sets in for you?? since girls make you feel uncomfortable, then you choose a lackluster relationship with a guy just to have some companionship?? am i following you correctly? your post was confusing.

if friends is what you want...then you might want to visit the socially inept thread or friendship thread.


i've actually wished i had a boyfriend right now. someone to share my time with here. i only have 3 months left so it kinda sucks. feels kinda awkward to start something. i've been tryin' to say i'm not frustrated with being single, but i am. truth be told. *sigh*


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"I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!"-Homer Simpson
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i_am_jan
post May 31 2008, 08:21 PM
Post #276


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Posts: 488
From: Columbus, Ohio


Just here reading posts. I don't actually want a dating relationship right now, as I just got out of two recently. What I really miss is having a dude to bum around with, you know, mostly as a friend. I grew up beside my bro, we were buds. My mom had mental issues, my dad was a calming presence, very relaxed, very quiet but very cool/nice. It's weird, again, I really don't want to be dating right now... would so much rather have girl friends and go out solo?. However, it sucks cuz I cannot be myself around most girls unfortunately, I always feel judged, like I have to PLEASE them somehow and I am nervous.. I *know* this is because of my relationship with my mom and I actually love girls it's just that I can't stop the anxiety when I'm around them. So I've been a serial dater and now seeing another guy-dating-relationship looming in the future simply because I want someone to hang out with. I just wish I could experience intimacy with girls, that way I wouldn't have to go into a dating relationship? (it's just that I don't want to fall in love again. (don't think I can take anymore after the last 5 years)

(hehe, peoples who know me from other threads are probably thinking how f*d up I am in how many areas)
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crazyoldcatlady
post May 30 2008, 02:49 PM
Post #277


the moistiest
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From: here. in my head.


sniggles, amen. i'm too old for games too. what's so hard about "I like you, let's spend time together" or "I don't like you as much, let's move on." i'm a big girl, i can take either.

and as a side note, yet another wedding stag coming up. this'll be fun.
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(crickets)
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sniggles
post May 28 2008, 03:33 PM
Post #278


BUSTie
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Posts: 14


Rant ahead!!

Since when do guys need to be chased after? Did I miss something? They are always bitching about how girls do this, but they are just as bad!! Maybe worse!!!
I just don't understand, you think that someone totally digs you but then you have to jump though hoops to be with them. Is this some sort of "test"? Or do they not want to give away their power or something? Or is there just something I'm doing wrong? Man.... I am just getting too old for these stupid ass games.
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geekchickknits
post May 23 2008, 09:37 AM
Post #279


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Posts: 319


Muffy, my secret is.......

well, I'm not sure. To tell the truth, I'm not used to attention from so many guys, or really, guys in general. Feel good about yourself; wear minimal, natural looking make-up; accept what people are offering. That's what I've been doing lately.

My situation is this:
1. LDR overseas, so obviously not going to get any there, except for the odd cyberportions, which is really not fulfilling.
2. actorboy is an old flame/fuck buddy now friend, although lately we have been doing the fuck buddy thing again. He was under the weather.
3. dancerboy is a new addition, completely unexpected. Met him at work, and then again at a mutual friend's party where he set out to get me, and by golly, he did. He actually ended up coming through. See portions thread.

All are aware that they are not the only man in my life, and all are cool with that, although it's not like I give them details about each other.

There are also two ex-fuck buddies that have been trying to get hold of me recently, but to be honest, I'm not even keen on contacting them ICOE. With both of them, it's kind of "been there done that".
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pherber
post May 23 2008, 05:14 AM
Post #280


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Posts: 337


Actually, I just realized, how stupid my post was, putting it down to IQ. rolleyes.gif
To have more intellectual interests hasn't that much to do with it.
I think most people are just interested in their social life (job, family, friends) or entertainment.
So the conversations are all about, what gigs/movies you went to, what so-and-so did, etc.
That gets so boring after a while.
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