[culturehandy]

Strawberry jam? What on earth does he thinks comes out of your vagina? Some sort of smelly creature that will eat your face off?

[edie52]

I was with a guy for years who wouldn't do it. He wanted to put strawberry jam down there to make it taste better. Hello, yeast infection! Can you tell he was an immature virgin when we met? I hope for his sake that he got over it.

[candycane_girl]

My first boyfriend went down on me long before I ever went down on him so now I just expect it. Hey, you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.

[zoya]

it's an absolute deal breaker for me. No way no how could I be with a guy who didnt' want to go down on me. I like it that much. I've been really fortunate to be with guys who really love to do it and are really pro at it. I can't actually remember any guy I've been with who was not into it. There was one guy who needed some direction, but he was a willing student - so it worked out -that was really the closest I've come to someone not doing it.

CH - I'm with you, why the hell would I go down on someone if they wouldn't do it, too??!

[erinjane]

It's now a deal breaker for me. I dated a guy (who coincidently was small, but still good generally good in bed) who just never did it. At the time I was pretty new to sex and felt uncomfortable asking, but when I did finally he said he just didn't like oral in general, including me giving to him.

Since then I've had two amazing partners who went down on my almost every single time we had sex, and there's no way in hell I'm going back now.

[culturehandy]

That's a deal breaker for me. If a guy doesn't eat pussy, but expects. Go to hell! My vagina is good enough to fuck but not lick. I knew a gut like that who was working hard to get in my pants. He heard that I was really good at giving head, when I found out he didn't go down on women, I told him he wouldn't be experiencing the pleasure of my mouth on his cock.

[p_176]

i once dated a guy (BRIEFLY) who expected oral sex and anal play, but would not do oral to me. also had the reasoning of it was dirty etc etc.

whatever!

[dj-bizmonkey]

ya know, you'd certainly think so, right?

i had a boyfriend when i was living in suriname and the men down there do NOT give head under any circumstances. my bf and i had an agreement while i was there, basically, if you won't do it for me, i won't do it for you, plain and simple. but it got to be very annoying, because he had no working knowledge of the clitoris and thought if he just pounded away at my vagina then that would suffice. i asked him one day what the problem was about giving oral and he said, 'it's dirty, we don't do that, it means you're not a man.' ugh, very difficult to be a cultural relativist in that situation. my reaction to his comment, 'you know you came out of a vagina, right?'

[zoya]

jeez, you'd think if they had a small penis, they'd make an effort to be extra good at oral....

[candycane_girl]

Am I the only person who senses a connection between guys that don't want to give oral sex and guys with small penises? Seriously!

[themeiu]

sybarite, you just reminded me of something similar that happened to me. I was making out with this guy who had been kind of a long-term crush for me. There was some groping and the he mutter "what would you like me to do to you?" I said something to the effect of "I'd love it if you went down on me". Silence. Then 5 minutes later: "what would you like me to do to you?" Seriously? I just told you what I wanted. If you didn't want to do it, then why did you ask? So then I just gave up and tried to have sex with him (not my brightest moment. I was young). But he couldn't stay hard and then he just passed out in my bed. Plus, he had the smallest dick I have ever seen, both length and width. He was a close friend of my brothers, but I would never talk to/see him again.

[culturehandy]

I remember one!

I was blowing this guy one time, and when he was getting close to orgasm, he started to count down from 5. I fucking swear. I had his cock in my mouth, and the first thought that ran through my head was, you have got to fucking kidding me.

[sybarite]

A friend and I ended up making out some years ago. We progressed to my bed and were having a great time until it became clear that he would not reciprocate in any way that took him below my waist, aside from actually having sex with me. He said 'I don't really like going down there, it gets so messy'. Um. What?

That ended the session pretty quickly. I have no idea how he persuaded anyone to actually sleep with him more than once with that MO.

Re. the farting: ew ew ew.

[edie52]

Zoya, my ex used to fart during sex. He often had gas and wasn't the type to hold back. He would stop thrusting, and kind of look to the side or squinch up his face, fart loudly, and then resume the act without missing a beat. I thought it was funny, even charming (hey, I was in love) at first, but it got OLD.

[culturehandy]

Oh I have a good one!

I had a man start playing with my feet while he was going down on me. It was so unexpected and he started licking harder and faster. He was really really turned on at playing with my feet.

[zoya]

ps - I have no idea how an "&" sign ended up at the end of the thread description....

[zoya]

well, as there has been a general consensus to start this thread, here we go! (and how ironic it is that this is the first thread I've ever started, considering I have only had sex twice this year. yes, it's been a dry one)

I can't think of having anyone do anything particularly weird, but I can think of a funny / odd one.... I got caught in a blizzard with a friend once for 3 days. We'd always kind of had a little thing for each other and we ended up having sex almost the whole time.. the only thing was, he had terrible gas for some reason. So with just about every thrust, he'd fart. at first he was mortified, then finally just gave in and went with it. I actually remember laughing during sex as he kept going 'here comes another one, hold your breath!' god.. it was pretty weird in the scheme of things, but it makes me laugh every time I think about it.