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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
auralpoison
post Sep 27 2010, 10:58 PM
Post #1021


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Posts: 4,932
From: Citizen of the world


I remeber that one article & well because it pissed me the fuck off. It was on the Frisky webpage. They didn't talk to anybody here, they just put it out there & they even quoted Kerabear. I mean, I know they didn't mean any harm & that it might have led ladies that needed a safe space here to the Lounge, but it also put it out there for the chodes to come a'runnin'. Thankfully they didn't.

I couldn't find anything from the LATimes, but I did spend a bit of time looking. Sorry. Perhaps it was from somewhere else, J_A_G will have to provide the link if he still has it.


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"You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."
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discowombat
post Sep 27 2010, 09:17 PM
Post #1022


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Posts: 52


QUOTE(sukouyant @ Sep 27 2010, 10:05 PM) *
Wait, wait...Persiflager is a man?!? *adjusts paradigm*


I think she's saying she's a woman with large breasts. :-) (please ignore me if that was meant as a joke and I missed it. It's been a hell of a month, lol)
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sukouyant
post Sep 27 2010, 09:05 PM
Post #1023


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 342
From: Canada


Wait, wait...Persiflager is a man?!? *adjusts paradigm*



To be sure, there are at least two mentions of this thread in articles across the web, and passages of the thread have been quoted. i think it's come up before.
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discowombat
post Sep 27 2010, 08:49 PM
Post #1024


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Posts: 52


QUOTE(roseviolet @ Sep 27 2010, 09:34 PM) *
Wait a sec ...
There is a newspaper article out there somewhere that has a link to this thread? JAG, could you provide us with a link to that article? I'd really like to see it. Not doubting you or anything. I'm just curious about why the author of that article felt compelled to write about this thread.


I don't remember where it was but I have heard in the past that our thread has been mentioned here and there. Kinda makes it awkward doesn't it? It reminds you that anyone can be all up in our business whether we like it or not. Despite the anonymity of the internet it does kind of make you clam up for a bit. Well, I do anyways.
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roseviolet
post Sep 27 2010, 08:34 PM
Post #1025


Pacifism kicks ass!
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QUOTE(just_a_guy @ Sep 27 2010, 03:16 PM) *
I'd also like to point out that I've been posting in this thread (as opposed to others) because I was directed to it through a news paper article forwarded by a female friend ...



Wait a sec ...
There is a newspaper article out there somewhere that has a link to this thread? JAG, could you provide us with a link to that article? I'd really like to see it. Not doubting you or anything. I'm just curious about why the author of that article felt compelled to write about this thread.
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nbdx0645
post Sep 27 2010, 06:44 PM
Post #1026


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Posts: 134


QUOTE(starship @ Sep 27 2010, 04:50 PM) *
Oh and after reading a link from here a few weeks back I bought a bra in a 32b instead of 34a and it fits! I was pathetically excited to be buying a B-cup bra. Although this was a particular bra that I'd bought before in a 34a and I knew it fitted me in that size (I'm not a real 34a!). Anyway, the link was correct and it does fit me a lot better and 'moves around' a lot less than the 34a version I'd been wearing.


My bra size changed from a 34 to a 32, too. The 32A is a bit snug in the top of the cup (their sizing runs smallish) but I prefer my bras on the tighter side, since they loosen up after some breaking-in. I think I'm going to modify my 34's by cutting an inch and a half of back band and sewing on the hook and eye.
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auralpoison
post Sep 27 2010, 04:57 PM
Post #1027


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Posts: 4,932
From: Citizen of the world


QUOTE(starship @ Sep 27 2010, 05:50 PM) *
Lol, I'd probably feel safer keeping one of my bigger busted friends to hand in case of emergency. My cups would barely cover my nose and mouth

Persi posted this last week, Bra Purse. laugh.gif


--------------------
"You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."
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starship
post Sep 27 2010, 04:50 PM
Post #1028


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Posts: 366


Ok, I'll ignore the big fat elephant in the room and just add my quick 2cents on a few other comments before bed...

QUOTE(melis19750 @ Sep 26 2010, 07:17 PM) *
but i just wanted to say I have always wished for a smaller size- like a nice full B cup or small C

Thats all I've wished for too honey.

QUOTE(auralpoison @ Sep 27 2010, 01:12 AM) *
ETA: I forgot about this Ignoble winner: the Emergency Bra!
[/color]

Lol, I'd probably feel safer keeping one of my bigger busted friends to hand in case of emergency. My cups would barely cover my nose and mouth

QUOTE(anarch @ Sep 27 2010, 06:15 AM) *
Also, I miss dj-bizmonkey. Anybody know where she went?

Wow, me too! You just reminded me of her awesome posts. I hope she is just busy and comes back some time.

QUOTE(roseviolet @ Sep 27 2010, 05:05 PM) *
For over 5 years I've been married to a man I met through this very forum.

Not boob-related but I didn't know this and just wanted to say how awesome I think it is:)

Also today I helped a woman in a store find some 28aa bras for her 12 year old daughter and shared a brief conversation with her about how we hate being 'taken over' by young girls. Not in a bitter way, we just joked about it a bit and shared a few quick stories. She was probably old enough to be my mum too but we still had the same body-issues and were able to laugh about them together. I felt like I'd met one of you guys in real life smile.gif

Oh and after reading a link from here a few weeks back I bought a bra in a 32b instead of 34a and it fits! I was pathetically excited to be buying a B-cup bra. Although this was a particular bra that I'd bought before in a 34a and I knew it fitted me in that size (I'm not a real 34a!). Anyway, the link was correct and it does fit me a lot better and 'moves around' a lot less than the 34a version I'd been wearing.

Night all x

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starship
post Sep 27 2010, 04:17 PM
Post #1029


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Posts: 366


I'm half way through catching up (woah a lot happened the last 2 days) and just got to this....
QUOTE(just_a_guy @ Sep 26 2010, 05:41 PM) *
For one, I'd argue that my breasts are as small as anybody else in this room.

Excuse me but you do not have breasts. period. How is this comment different from all those I've gotten in the past telling me some random chubby guy on the street/beach has 'bigger boobs than me'. Ugh.
I'm with Buttercups in wondering what your motives are for being here :S. We don't need some booby superman stepping in to save us.

Maybe the rest of the posts will enlighten me. *Gets back to her catch up sesh*
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just_a_guy
post Sep 27 2010, 02:16 PM
Post #1030


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Posts: 34
From: Los Angeles, CA


First off, I'd like to thank roseviolet, karategrrl, Persiflager, anarch, and angie_21 (in reverse post order)

You've given me a lot of food for thought, and I'll probably read your posts a few more times before I digest it all.

I'd also like to point out that I've been posting in this thread (as opposed to others) because I was directed to it through a news paper article forwarded by a female friend (as I said in my first post) and I get email notifications when there is a new post, not because I don't want to engage in discussions in other threads. I'm sure that I have plenty to learn, and plenty to say, about feminism, prop-8, and a plethora of other issues that are probably on here somewhere.

That said, I work two jobs and started posting here smack dab in the middle of Jewish holiday season, so I haven't exactly had a lot of free time to look around.

Angie: you, in particular, made some very valid points, and if you'd be willing to point me toward some online resources via PM I'd love to read up on the topics you suggested, because you're right: It's outside my area of expertise.

You were particularly right about my last post being overly condescending and rude. I hope that you can understand the frustration of what feels like character assassination, against which there is no defense. It doesn't excuse it, but I hope it at least explains it.

I still maintain that I have every right to call myself a BUSTie, not because I filled out a registration form, but because I am honestly trying to contribute something. If I'm failing that's a different issue.

The only reason I mentioned the reverse sexism angle was because of the fact that the "how can women feel comfortable talking about insecurities in front of men" argument has been included in multiple critical responses to my posts.

I DO think that it's ridiculous to say that I can't empathize with the plight of women's self-image issues because mine are not exactly the same, but I've also seen drug addicts get kicked out of AA meetings for not being alcoholics, and literally watched a heroin and a crack addict argue about how stupid the other was without seeing the similarities in their states. Although I do not personally suffer from addictions to any substance I've been to AA, NA, CA, SA, SAA, SLAA, MA, Codependency, Al-Anon, and Al-ATeen meetings and as far as I can see, the underlying issues are pretty much the same across the board. Not suffering the exact same manifestation doesn;t preclude empathy.

The half tongue in cheek comments in my initial post were more intended to be truthful about my personality than to be rude or condescending, and when I say I've tried to talk women out of getting implants perhaps I should have specified that I was trying to convince them to address their insecurities before making a decision to undergo a potentially life-threatening cosmetic procedure.

I don't know how many people have complained about me to other members of the board, but I certainly haven't received those PMs, and they are more than welcome to direct their complaints to me. As far as I know I've received more positive feedback than negative here.

Sometimes I can be an entitled, judgmental, narcissistic, self-indulgent, jack-ass, know-it-all. Although I am intelligent, I am still young. I certainly don't know it all and I am certainly open to hearing other points of view, particularly when they are founded in reason and research. As far as my negative personality traits go, I'm slowly learning to cut my self some slack for not being perfect. Sometimes that comes across as unapologetic.

Still, maybe it's time for me to lurk a little more before I post, or not post at all in this thread if that's the consensus.

ps- karategrrl: after APs post regarding her take on my personality type, my first gut was to contact you and ask if you felt it was accurate. Instead I chose to have a few close friends read it and give me their opinions of how well the shoe fit and contacted AP directly to discuss our differences (partially because they know me much more intimately, and partially because I didn't want to come off as asking you to defend me). I do want to thank you for your honest opinion about me, good and bad.

I'll shut up now.


--------------------
Sometimes when all you want is a tall glass of water, life gives you a Short Glass of Milk
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roseviolet
post Sep 27 2010, 11:05 AM
Post #1031


Pacifism kicks ass!
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QUOTE(karategrrl @ Sep 27 2010, 09:00 AM) *
Iím sure heíll get it. If everyone would feel more comfy with this forum being female-only, maybe it should be specified.


Just a clarification, Karategrrl. Did you mean to say "thread" instead of "forum"? The Bust Lounge is a forum. The small breast support group is a thread within a forum.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

For those of you who know me, you will not be surprised to hear that I strongly support the presence of men on Bust. For over 5 years I've been married to a man I met through this very forum. There are some other fantastic guys who have participated on these forums over the years and I'm happy to consider them my friends.

But they behaved differently than how JAG has behaved so far.

I am highly suspicious of guys who show up and post in ONLY the sex threads or the threads that focus on breasts and female genitalia. It makes me wonder how they found Bust in the first place. It makes me wonder why they're sticking around. It makes me wonder if they're incapable of engaging in normal conversations with women about non-sexual topics. Ordinarily, these characters seem stunted to me and pretty clueless about feminism and the female experience. They offer their perspective, but their comments on the perspectives of others seems veiled in condescension. The saddest ones are the guys who *think* they're behaving in a feminist manner, yet continue to fall back on the same patronizing bullshit that AP mentioned earlier. IF THEY ARE SMART, these guys will heed OUR advice (rather than just offering their own), and begin to learn from their experience here. If they aren't, they'll collect up their bruised egos and limp away.

Note: I do not think it takes a tough guy to be accepted here. Far from it. All it takes is a human being who respects the rest of us as fellow human beings. We're a loving group. Sometimes we get spicy. Sometimes we fight. That's because we're all unique individuals and, invariably, we'll disagree from time to time. Yet there is a lot of love and support and mutual respect here. If you can feel some genuine humility and empathy towards the unique experiences of other human beings, you'll be happy here. But if you act like you're The Voice Of Men on this forum, you're going to suffer.

JAG, we share information here. You may give it, but you gotta learn to take it, too. Because, buddy, you've got a lot to learn.


Anarch, thank you so much for finding and posting that quote from AuralPoison. And thank you, AP, for writing it in the first place.
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karategrrl
post Sep 27 2010, 08:00 AM
Post #1032


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Posts: 714


WOW, I missed a lot over the weekend! tongue.gif

A few points:

1. Movies:
Saw the new Resident Evil over the weekend movie starring my gal, Milla Jovovich. LOVE HER! Okay, the plot wasn't great, and it was retarded to see her and the other people in the movie impeccably makeup-ed while they were supposedly fighting for their lives in apocolyptic conditions. BUT...Milla rocked her booblets sans padding, bra, or apology. Wonderfully refreshing. Magically delicious.

Also saw the classic Bonnie & Clyde for the first time. Faye Dunaway wasn't wearing a bra the whole time. Much nipplage ensued. Hot.

2. Tales from Braless, Mirrorless Land:
Forgive me, but I have C.R.S. (Canít Remember Shit) and have forgotten the screen name of the anthropologist who went braless on her recent jaunt. TELL! DO TELL!!! We want to know and be inspired!!

3. Okay, on to the hot topic:
While I have not personally liked everything JAG has said (and yes, at times some things he's said seemed to me to hint at the wordiness or the "look at me, I'm so sensitive") this is a forum of discussion. No one told JAG that he couldn't post here or asked him to leave, so he hasn't.

With MORE than a little bit of reservation, I emailed JAG off-board a couple weeks ago and asked for his take on a "guy thing." It was off-topic, so I did so off-board. (Like it or not, Iím married to a guy-guy who doesnít have much of a talent for words, and in trying to understand some male behavior, Iím really at a loss. Yes, if I were single, Iíd say "fuck it"and just not give the time of day to any guy-guy. But Iím married, so I have to give this some effort.) Anyway, as much as I hate to admit it, JAG provided some perspective. No, I did not agree with or like all he had to say, but in his response were threads of useful info that really do help me "get" my hubby. JAG did not volunteer--I asked. It was helpful to me.

That said, honestly I, too, feel a little weird having a guy hereósometimes I just want to be with you girls. And yes, Iíve often questioned JAGís motives and presence here, and the frequency and length of posts lately.

Iíve been a member here for 3 years, I think. I really enjoy reading everyoneís posts, and though I may not agree with them all, I respect them and relish the chance to just hear and understand othersí views here. Weíve had some interesting folks come in and outómale (remember Smoove-B, anyone??!!) and female (and yes, I also miss dj-biz monkey, who I think is crazy busy with school). I hope my posts have been useful or at least as thought-provoking as all of yours have been to me.

My personal feelings about JAG are mixed, but if Iím getting this right, what Iím seeing with the majority of regulars here is that they feel uncomfortable with JAG, and that the discomfort is increasing. Majority rules. If you donít want him here or would prefer that he just lurk, just say so. Iím sure heíll get it. If everyone would feel more comfy with this forum being female-only, maybe it should be specified.
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Persiflager
post Sep 27 2010, 05:18 AM
Post #1033


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Posts: 721
From: Babylon


I second all the wise and thoughtful posts below.

Just_a_guy, you have as much right to post here as I do, in that neither of us is a woman with small breasts. This is not a 'body issues' support thread. Much as we might sympathise and indeed empathise with the sentiments posted here, we do not and cannot understand exactly what it is to be a woman with small breasts. Our viewpoints and experiences are not sought and, while they may be useful, are unlikely to be the most important ones here. Get over it.

Oh, and while I thank you for your thoughtful comment about how metaphors can be confusing, I must point out that they are on the curriculum for nine-year-olds, and therefore we've all had a few years to grapple with their complexity. Admittedly that's in the UK so your experience might be different, but I think it's safe to assume that the teenagers and adult women of this board will somehow struggle through.

ETA: Apologies for snark. I bow to karategrrl's calm tolerance.


--------------------
‚ÄúLogic is the art of going wrong with confidence.‚ÄĚ
Morris Kline (mathematician, author) 1908-1992
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anarch
post Sep 27 2010, 12:15 AM
Post #1034


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Posts: 873


Some of your comments, just_a_guy, struck me as probably helpful to some. Others grated. In fact, they fit so strongly with an analysis of auralpoison's from last year that I went looking for her comment:

QUOTE(auralpoison @ May 27 2009, 07:25 AM) *
Look, it's like this: 98.4% of men who start posting here immediately go into the breast threads or the sex threads. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. They can't turn the cock off for a half an hour to peruse the forums for something non-physical/sexual they might be interested in talking about. They don't post about the latest book they read, they don't post any good vegan recipes, they don't post about third wave feminism, they don't post about what they think of California upholding Prop 8, they don't post about volunteer work, they don't post angst about their jobs, they don't post angst about their familes, etc. Oh, no, they boldly offer us the male persepective on our bits because that's the *most common sense* place to start addressing women that by & large align themselves with the dreaded "F word". "Tits. They're hella feminist! Let's talk about yours!"

Then, if their schtick isn't vulgar, crass or purely retarded, it's the nice/mega-cheesy guy routine: All breasts are great, guys love 'em big or small, they individually prefer smaller & are proud of it, they share an anecdote wherein they felt they were being judged by their appearance & how they dealt with it, again all breasts are great, & we should love our bodies, ourselves. . . .

But it often comes back to the same thing with many men, doesn't it? That breast are for adornment, for nabbing Mr. Right, female completion through male validation. They frequently don't know about/consider the variety of things that vex us about our mammaries, like buying a swimsuit, inverted nipples, menstrual breast aches, marked unevenness, fibroids, breast feeding, jogger's nipples, etc. Men don't empathize with the OTHER issues of having breasts because they don't have them, hence they can only expound about what they actually know: they are fun to look at & play with & they're happy as clams when they get to.

As far as rules/stickies go, Geoff, . . . Common Sense. I realize this is the intarwebs & all, but you basically introduced yourself to a party full of FEMINIST women, proceeded to step into a conversation about something fairly personal, & offered your not too terribly useful insight. It wasn't offensive, just inappropriate. You didn't give a host a hug, you didn't stop by the kitchen, you didn't grab a drink, you had no idle chitchat about the latest summer blockbuster . . .


Also, the comments auralpoison and Angie singled out as problems are ones that bothered me too, for the same reasons. (Welcome back, Angie! I was just thinking to myself the other day, "Isn't Angie due back in the Lounge by now?")

Especially the way you assume that the only reason some might take exception to some of your comments, is that you're not a woman. Persiflager said in last year's conversation about Geoff that there are men who participate in the Lounge in various threads, who've lurked here long enough to get a feel for how this place works and their interest in the Lounge is well-rounded, not restricted to sex or boob threads, and "they fit in well here." It's true. I think you mean well. There are other reasons for considering some (not all) of your comments objectionable. If you listen more instead of jumping to conclusions like "it's because I'm not a woman," you might understand what they are.

I couldn't find half the stuff I was looking for in the archives of this thread, but seriously, you may find reading the old posts instructive.

Also, I miss dj-bizmonkey. Anybody know where she went?
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buttercups
post Sep 26 2010, 09:46 PM
Post #1035


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Posts: 294


Ahh gotta run to bed but I just wanted to pop in and say how much I love my Bustie gals!

Thanks for having my back you all rock!

<3
buttercups
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nbdx0645
post Sep 26 2010, 08:53 PM
Post #1036


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 134


QUOTE(enfermera @ Sep 26 2010, 06:09 PM) *
this? freaking hawt. glad to see you back, angie!


Quoted for truth. Welcome back from your trip. It sounds that you were completely in-tune with your body while you were gone. I love that feeling.

I'm also glad that Angie addressed this comment before me: "For one, I'd argue that my breasts are as small as anybody else in this room." No you don't. That remark is flippant and demeans the personal struggles of every girl here." I'm a woman who, in college, could describe her breasts as 'nipples on a ribcage.' I was told that my male friend has better-looking breasts than me, and I posted the story on this forum recently. That's the most hurtful sentence I've ever seen in this thread. I think that sentence deserves a big FUCK YOU.

I also wish that buttercups' post would have given you more perspective on our feelings. Dismissing that post with little regard was one of the worst things you could have done to such a thoughtful and sensitive individual.

And AP, I agree with everything you're saying. I take no offense; I'm happy you came into the thread. I wish I would have said something sooner. =/
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auralpoison
post Sep 26 2010, 07:12 PM
Post #1037


Big Fat Bitch
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Posts: 4,932
From: Citizen of the world


Uh, just so you know, Angie, TPTB chose to take away the TIO thread with absolutely zero explanation. They giveth, yadda yadda yadda.

Glad you're back though & cannot wait to hear tales of your journey!

I would like to take a moment to apologize to any *legit* Busties if I have offended you & also for the further derail. I just couldn't let what I view as a pervy, fetishistic, 135lb gorilla in the room go without further comment, especially after I have been in communication with no less than eight Busties that aren't crazy about J_A_G or his brand of BS.

I'd like to think most of you know me pretty well, I'm old school & I put it out there 100% come hell or high water. And as a busty Bustie, I don't come in here a lot, but when I do I behave respectfully & bring some food for thought. I usually have a link to share that is on topic & I'd like to think contributes to the conversation at hand. I do not/did not come in here just to stir the turd. I wish to make that plain.

But statements like this?

QUOTE(just_a_guy @ Sep 2 2010, 03:54 PM) *
I've been trying to talk female acquaintances out of getting implants since I was 14 (I've only failed once) and, while I used to joke that I ran "a non-profit organization dedicated to preventing the extinction of the small-breasted American female" (and that we pursued our mission through offerings of small breast appreciation seminars and one-on-one hands on workshops) the truth is that I honestly care.


Yeah, do not bode well in male contributors. I do not like the idea that some guy walked in here patting himself on the back for talking "female acquaintances" out of getting implants as though those women didn't know their own bodies, minds & hearts & needed male input to make the right choice for themselves. It's J_A_G's numerous similar statements that just scream entitled MWET/sneaky whimpster to me & it makes me question his motivations for being here. Like, he's not here to be helpful, he's here because he has a thing for smart, funny, lovely women with small busts & now has a captive audience of them for his meandering, faux-sensitive, psycho-babble fap fap fapping.

ETA: I forgot about this Ignoble winner: the Emergency Bra!


--------------------
"You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."
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angie_21
post Sep 26 2010, 06:43 PM
Post #1038


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 662
From: Alberta


I have mountains of homework to do, but I'm all riled up! As usual. Buttercups and Syb, you're not stepping on anyone's toes or being at all pushy or offensive. I am so glad you are speaking up for your thoughts. I still haven't had the chance to read back thru much of the past few months conversations, and maybe I'm going to be judging JAG a bit harshly based on his rude comments to nbdx and his dismissiveness or your post, buttercups, but I am a little taken aback that he feels he can talk like that on this board and not get a bad reaction?

JAG, your attitude in both of those posts is not the best way to get women to want to talk to you. We've run into problems with men coming onto this message board with what they think are innocent or good intentions before. We're sick of men telling us what they do or don't find attractive. We're defensive about it. If you haven't studied the feminist/anthropological concepts of male privilege and safe spaces, please go do some research. Buttercup's statement to you was polite, heartfelt, and really important to her, and you pretty much dismissed it out of hand based on the assumption that just because some women were comfortable with you here, means we all should be. I don't know what your own personal issues are, but if you do have issues or you own, you should be here to share them, not to talk about our issues and pass out benevolent advice from your perspective as a man. I don't want to be picking a fight in any way, and if you feel the following comments are unfair, please lets take it outside. But I feel the need to stand up for my homegirls. And I want to point out to you some of your comments that reveal your feelings of entitlement and male privilege, hoping you can see why they are inappropriate for this board and why comments like that make some of us uncomfortable with anything else you have to say, no matter how insightful:

"For one, I'd argue that my breasts are as small as anybody else in this room." No you don't. That remark is flippant and demeans the personal struggles of every girl here.
"I joined in the conversation because I thought I could add something to it. So far the only reason anyone has suggested that this is impossible is that I'm not a woman." On no, reverse sexism! Except that's not what buttercups said. She said the style and content of your comments sometimes make her uncomfortable. From my own point of view, on a message board where we're trying to discuss body issues and how we react to male objectification, having a guy come in and express what he finds physically attractive can be a bit counterproductive. If you can't respect the fact that we're going to react that way, then you need to step back and figure out why you're here. To join in and "add something," or to get something for yourself no matter how we feel about it?
"Yes I think I add more to BUST than I take away, and I take offense to being excluded in your use of the phrase "any BUSTie." I'm a BUSTie too. Look, it says so right under my avatar." Dude, George Bush could sign up for an account and it would say Bustie under his name. It wouldn't make him one. Again, flippant and dismissive.
"If you actually want clarification of something I've written in the future, I would ask that you ask for it respectfully, without the sarcastic undertones that there is no explanation. I would certainly offer you the same respect." don't say that when you're being snarky yourself. It's disingenuous.

If you'd like to talk anthropology, or continue this discussion, pm me any time, or we can go to the take it outside thread.
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enfermera
post Sep 26 2010, 06:09 PM
Post #1039


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 158
From: sweet, sweet virginia


this? freaking hawt. glad to see you back, angie!

QUOTE(angie_21 @ Sep 26 2010, 10:39 AM) *
Guy's writing made sense to me, it's a common argument I've heard many times before, but it's been rejected within anthropological thought for decades already. Evolutionary psychology is pop-psycho-babble at its finest. Take vast generalizations about what men do and what women do, try to explain them in terms of "survival" without any analogy to primate behaviour or any statistical verification of these supposed male/female behaviours, and publish a book about it. It's men are from mars, women are from venus, with a pseudo-scientific veneer. No real anthropologist I know even bothers to talk about these theories except for drunken discussions at the bar. Most evolutionary psychology actually assumes that humans act completely different from their closest primate relatives, but still explains our behaviour in terms of biology and evolution. Female chimpanzees are generally promiscuous and don't even rely on males to care for their young. That kind of messes up a lot of those theories right there, doesn't it? Evolutionary psychology also assumes that modern, western cultures represent all human behaviour and that our gender roles and child-rearing strategies are universal. Wrong again, monogamous child-rearing isn't always a factor in mate selection, women generally do care about appearance but just often don't have the social/cultural power to be able to make decisions based on those preferences. It's cultural, not biological. If we want to go with one of the more blatant vast generalizations, why not say that women have to seek men with power because it's usually been taken away from us on a personal level, instead of blaming it on "instinct?" We can argue about this crap all day, but because it's not based on anything other than generalization and bastardization of the concept of evolution, anything we discuss is irrelevant.

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buttercups
post Sep 26 2010, 03:41 PM
Post #1040


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 294


Thanks so much Syb, that is exactly what I was trying to say!

JAG you may have other insecurities but they are not identical to what we experience here and I still don't understand how women with small breasts directly impacts you since you are not a woman with small breasts. I wouldn't join a support group for men with small dicks, because even if I dated someone with a small penis or whatnot I would not feel right joining in on group because a small penis is not something I know anything about dealing with, regardless of who else in my life has one. Maybe a small penis support group or something like that might be a more appropriate arena for you?
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