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koffeewitch
post Oct 6 2009, 08:12 AM
Post #41


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 474
From: the Hundred Acre Woods


I wish we COULD get stats on these things...so many rapes/DV cases are un/under-reported. My take on that 1 in 4 stat is this: 1 out of every 4 college-aged women will be the victim of a rape or an attempted-rape. 1 in 3 or 4 (depending on source) girls are sexually molested/raped before the age of 18. THe stat on boys varies from 1in 6 to 1 in 10. (Personally, I believe in the U.S. that almost 1 in every 2 girls are molested...I have no evidence to back this up but my experiences talking to other women. Among my friends it's 50%). I think the stat on boys is also way too low. The source on these stats are usually government/law-enforcement. I feel both these agencies have a vested interest in misrepresenting the facts. I heard on NPR that my city (Columbus, Ohio) has the highest number of rapes per capita. Surprised, I questioned a number of police officers who had (or claimed to have ) NO IDEA of such a problem in our city.
Anyway,maybe try starting with your city's police web site for local crime stats...usually there will be links to national info. If we created a "feminist website" with all these stats too many people would find us uncreditable, but no one argues with the police findings...atleast that tells us what is reported if not the real number of cases.


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"The U.S. is the only nation on Earth to pass from barbarism into decadence without once passing through an era of civilization."
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candycane_girl
post Sep 24 2009, 04:08 PM
Post #42


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 2,336
From: Canada


tree, I've never broken down crying out of frustration in front of someone but I have gotten to the point where my voice is shakey and my face turns bright red. Is there any way that you can leave the room and go to a bathroom or something to cry? For me sometimes it's better to focus on the anger. Like, I tell myself, "I'm not sad, I'm pissed off and I will be damned if anyone makes me cry!" I hope that helps.

I was just wondering if anyone knows where to get reliable statistics on rape, assult and domestic violence. I have often heard that the stat of 1 in 4 women getting raped is actually way off base. I just want to tell people the truth and not be spouting off fake statistics. That would be very bad. I will start looking at StatsCan but that website is horrid and impossible to navigate.
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treehugger
post Sep 23 2009, 05:44 PM
Post #43


cryostat bitch
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Posts: 1,717


I want to learn how to not cry? It is affecting my credibility at work. Whenever I get into a confrontation or a situation where I get angry, I start to cry. I work as the only woman in a male shop. And I am getting to a point where there are underlings and I need to keep them "in their place". One of the newbies screwed up one of my projects after I had left, and I really need to be able to tell him that is NOT COOL, without breaking down into tearss. I know if the newbie sees tears rolling down my cheeks, I will lose respect.

Sooo, how do I steel myself when I am angry and allow myself to just plain be angry? Kick holes in walls, punch things, as long as I don't CRY. ???

Psychologists? Tradeswomen? Mothers? Supervisors? Anybody?

ETA: I don't want to totally stop crying, I have no issue with crying at a sad thing. I just don't want to cry when I really just want to kick somebody's butt. Same also kind of goes for crying during happy things, but not as important.


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Persiflager
post Sep 22 2009, 12:42 AM
Post #44


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 721
From: Babylon


I think the default is normally no children, but I've made mistakes on profiles before. Or perhaps he means it metaphorically - is he the proud parent of a piece of art, or a really immature friend?

Good luck...


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“Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence.”
Morris Kline (mathematician, author) 1908-1992
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humanist77
post Sep 21 2009, 10:56 PM
Post #45


belligerently lazy
***
Posts: 903
From: Chicago


when a Myspace user does not specify in their profile whether they have children or not, does anyone know if the site defaults to "proud parent", or does my boyfriend have some explaining to do? Just found an old profile of his...huh.gif


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I pledge allegiance to and wrap myself in the flag of the United States Against Anything Un-American and to the Republicans for which it stands, two nations, under Jesus, rich against poor, with curtailed liberty and justice for all except blacks, homosexuals, women who want abortions, Communists, welfare queens, treehuggers, feminazis, illegal immigrants, children of illegal immigrants, and you if you don't watch your step.
-Matt Groening, Life in Hell
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pollystyrene
post Aug 26 2009, 10:45 AM
Post #46


Too many mutha uckas, Uckin' with my shi-
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Posts: 4,631
From: Chicago


Probably a dumb question, but there's no website where you can upload a picture and it will do a search to find the image on other websites? I have a picture I downloaded from somewhere and I want to find where I got it. Google Images has not helped so far.

ETA: There is such a thing! A reverse image search engine! And I found what I wanted!


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You went to school where you were taught to fear and to obey, be cheerful, fit in, or someone might think you're weird.
Life can be perfect. People can be trusted. Someday, I will fall in love; a nice quiet home of my very own.
Free from all the pain. Happy and having fun all the time.
It never happened, did it?
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treehugger
post Aug 25 2009, 04:09 PM
Post #47


cryostat bitch
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Posts: 1,717


AP, can you get on FB so we can chat about it?? It'd be nice to be able to go back and forth so I can ask questions/you answer/me deduce further and ask more questions, etc.

Check your PMs


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starshine
post Aug 24 2009, 01:06 PM
Post #48


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 100


I crossposted this in the NYC Busties Thread but thought I would post here too.

I'm headed to New York next Monday thru Saturday afternoon and am looking for some ideas of what to do, in addition to the typical stops of the Empire State Building and Central Park. I'm staying in the Lower Eastside.

Any favourite/must-see spots would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

and auralpoison, that sucks about the AC. I had to turn on the heat in our house this morning as it was so close to frost last night. And it's still August!!! dry.gif


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auralpoison
post Aug 24 2009, 12:55 PM
Post #49


Big Fat Bitch
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Posts: 4,932
From: Citizen of the world


TREEHUGGER! My AC has died! It's maybe four years old, I dunno what the fuck is going on. Yesterday, it just decided to stop working. I keep it at a constant moderate temp in the summer, 74f & I keep it downright COLD in the winter at 68f. Dude can't be here until Wed afternoon! Any ideas? I am sweating like a hog!


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"You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."
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pollystyrene
post Aug 22 2009, 10:26 PM
Post #50


Too many mutha uckas, Uckin' with my shi-
***
Posts: 4,631
From: Chicago


Go with a company that, first and foremost, makes cameras, like Canon or Nikon. I'm partial to Canon. Sony is okay, but not great. I wouldn't go with anything else. Getting something with a good lens is going to make the difference. You want something that has an optical zoom for as great a range as possible before it switches to digital zoom. Basically, optical zoom is the zooming that created by the actual lenses in the camera. When it switches to digital zoom, it's zooming in closer, but it's sort of "creating" the details of the image digitally, with the computer in the camera. The image quality won't be as good as it will when you're still in the optical range. So you want one that has as great an optical range as possible (obviously, more optical=more money, usually.)

Here's the one I've got (in blue smile.gif) We've had it since April and love it. It takes great pictures and is easy enough to use, once you get the hang of it. It has some great features on it.

cc_girl, I can give you some advice on camcorders tomorrow when LeBoy is awake.


--------------------
You went to school where you were taught to fear and to obey, be cheerful, fit in, or someone might think you're weird.
Life can be perfect. People can be trusted. Someday, I will fall in love; a nice quiet home of my very own.
Free from all the pain. Happy and having fun all the time.
It never happened, did it?
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culturehandy
post Aug 22 2009, 02:52 PM
Post #51


(o)(o)
***
Posts: 11,350
From: Oh boobs


Canon also makes a nice digi camera, I have a canon and like it.


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Hatred does not cease in this world by hating, but by not hating; this is an eternal truth. --- Buddah, The Dhammapada
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auralpoison
post Aug 22 2009, 02:07 PM
Post #52


Big Fat Bitch
***
Posts: 4,932
From: Citizen of the world


I rock a simple little Nikon Coolpix. It's easy to use, moderately priced, & fits in my pocket. Even the pictures taken whilst drunk were pretty good!


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"You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."
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kittenb
post Aug 22 2009, 01:32 PM
Post #53


There is nothing ironic about Show Choir!
***
Posts: 3,261
From: Chicago


In a similar vein, I would like to buy my first digital camera and I would like suggestions. Just a simple point and shoot that I can download to my computer. Thanks!


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In times of destruction, create something.
MHK
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candycane_girl
post Aug 22 2009, 01:05 PM
Post #54


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 2,336
From: Canada


Can anyone recommend a good camcorder? My cousin is getting married next year and I've been feeling like I want to make a little documentary out of the whole event. Usually when someone in my family gets married it ends up being like a family reunion and I want to get it all on tape....er, digital memory or whatever.

I saw a cool looking camcorder called MinoHD but it only holds up to 60 minutes of footage and it doesn't say if it uses a memory card or not. Do all digital camcorders use memory cards?

And does anyone know if there is a Mac program to edit all the footage?
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stargazer
post Aug 17 2009, 08:06 PM
Post #55


brown delicious
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Posts: 2,938
From: here, there, everywhere


Thanks cc_girl and & angie!



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"I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!"-Homer Simpson
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angie_21
post Aug 17 2009, 05:13 PM
Post #56


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


RSVP usually means to say whether you're going, yes or no. If you haven't responded, they don't know if you're just taking a long time to decide, or if you've lost or never gotten the invitation. And yeah, I've shown up without RSVP-ing before (oops!), so they never really know what's happening if you don't say one way or the other.

Some people can get really into weddings, but in my experience, it's really not a big deal to not attend a wedding if you haven't seen the person in a few years. There are a million excuses you can use to skip out on it. I think it's only considered bad etiquette to miss a wedding if you spend a significant amount of time with the person outside of work, or if you had already RSVP-ed yes and don't say no until the last minute (once they have booked caterers and stuff, it's a waste of money for them if you back out).

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candycane_girl
post Aug 17 2009, 04:43 PM
Post #57


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 2,336
From: Canada


I think it's best to contact the party either way rather than leave them hanging. People in my culture are notorious for not rsvping to weddings and then showing up anyway.

Just wondering, what exactly do you mean by the etiquette for inviting people to a wedding? Do you mean that people should only invite very close friends and family as opposed to also inviting acquaintances?
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stargazer
post Aug 17 2009, 01:41 PM
Post #58


brown delicious
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Posts: 2,938
From: here, there, everywhere


etiquette question: when you get an invite for a party and it says RSVP, do you contact the party to let them know you cannot go. i realized that i didn't rsvp no for a wedding. so, with the bride to be hounding me, i had to let her know i couldn't go. btw, um, what is the etiquette for inviting people for a wedding? i spoke with polly about this. i consider this girl a friend, we met through work. haven't hungout in 3 years and haven't really kept in contact with the occasional forward cute things emails? so, i guess i've been struck by the amount of pressure i feel to attend this wedding. i thought i would hangout with her on the bachelorette party even though i know none of her friends. it will be an interesting night. i couldn't say no, well, i could've, but, she's been tracking me from fb to my cell. ugh.


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"I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!"-Homer Simpson
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hellotampon
post Jul 31 2009, 07:27 AM
Post #59


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,018
From: Connecticut


QUOTE(girltrouble @ Jul 30 2009, 08:25 AM) *
and then when coming down, it was just jaw clenching tension, but i think that acid had some speed in it.

Acid will do that. I doubt it had speed in it. Especially if it was blotter.
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girltrouble
post Jul 30 2009, 02:46 PM
Post #60


new highs in personal lows daily!
***
Posts: 4,307
From: wherever ink is put in skin...


hah. *shrugs* ok, maybe it's just different in seattle or maybe just my environment. when i was doing support work with trans youth it was always questioning, never queer. to put it at the end of LGBTQ, well, that'd be redundant. that's not to say we didn't use the word queer, that just wasn't what the Q in LGBTQ was for. but perhaps that's just a seattle thing. round these parts queer means all o' y'all.


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"what a swell farewell party! we said goodbye to everything, including the lining in my stomach." - garvey, from the film, born bad

"That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted." --margo channing, all about eve
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