[steppe_child]

I disagree--I think that customers have to understand that there might be retribution for being bitchy and rude. Otherwise we are all out there making $3.15 an hour without any recourse.

Then again, I have not been a server since 1998 so maybe things have changed.

[pollystyrene]

My boyfriend's brother worked as a room service waiter at a hotel when he was in college. There was a woman there on business, staying for about a week and got most of her meals from room service. She was a real pain in the ass, always bitching about something and sending food back for no good reason. On her 3rd day or so, she sent back the vegetables that came with her entree back because they weren't hot enough or not enough sauce, something like that. My BIL took it back to the kitchen and the chef had enough of her crap, so he dropped trou and peed in them, then warmed them up some more...I guess the smell of cooked pee was worth it!

My dad has been a waiter for over 30 years, and he said that there's been plenty of times when he's wanted to do something bad to customers food, but like you said, edna, it's not worth the reputation of the restaurant to do so. I think karma will take care of rude customers!

[pepper]

ooh, the windex revenge. truly, he must have been heinous to deserve such punishment. that's almost as bad as visine, yikes.

[edna]

Yes, I'm with pepper. I've waited on some truly rude and clueless people, but I've never done any 'revenge' service. I've mostly worked for small, family-run restaurants or else for chefs that take their work really seriously. In those restaurants, the food itself and the reputation of the business were too important and meaningful to risk for secret revenge on a jerk.

Weirdly enough, in all my years of food service work, I only witnessed one incident of food tampering revenge. At a large fine dining place, one of the bartenders put Windex in the dining room manager's after-shift drinks. The DR manager was a true asshat. A few months later, somebody slashed his tires.

[pepper]

Don't Do It!!! getting caught coughing in someone's gazpacho is WAY worse than just learning to not give a crap about stupid patrons.
my 2 cents.

[steppe_child]

Hey Tyger--I was you in a past life! I worked at a Chinese buffet for about 5 years in my hometown (through high school and part of college). You have to realize that there are a lot of cheap fucks out there who don't want to pay anything and eat as much as humanly possible. But, looking back, I have forgotten most of the rotten assholes (except for the one prick who yelled at me on EASTER Sunday while I was working at Cheddar's) and just remember the friends I still have who were servers with me.

I did some really mean things while I was a server--licking people's lemons when I had a chest cold, recycling fried noodles, dropping egg rolls on the floor--so you will have ample opportunity to exact revenge on the negative patrons!

[greenbean]

Then on the other hand, you have the very non-gourmet crowd that ask for stuff we dont have, and then get frustrated when we dont have it. example:
"I'll have the salad but can you replace the coconut vinaigrette with ranch please?"
"Sorry, we dont have ranch"
"What! How can you not have ranch!?...I guess I'll just have a burrito instead"
"Um, we are a Cuban place not Mexican, so, um, sorry no burritos."
"No burritos!?, fine I'll have to think about it,..in the mean time can we have some chips and salsa for the table?"
"um...we dont do that here...."

Those situations are always uncomfortable, because I don't want to come off as a snob but sometimes I want to shake them and say "why did you come HERE!? Theres a taqueria and a burger joint down the street!"

[zora]

You know who bugs me? The people that go all over town looking for the "best" fill-in-the-blank. I just met tiramisu guy. He says we need to chop the chocolate more coarsly. I say he needs to make his own damn Tira and not bug me about it. Fuck that guy!
*walks away, fists balled up*
*tellmehowtodomyjobgrumblehisssspit*
*grrrrrrrrrrrrr*

[ris]

Greenbean, I console myself by thinking that these know-it-all/show-off asshats probably have no real friends to speak of. Um, yeah, like your dinner companions really care whether or not the wine they're drinking was put through malolactic fermentation. Zzzzzzzz... boring.

I'm so over this job.

That is all.

[sybarite]

Greenbean, I used to hate those people who were seemingly professional restaurant-goers. Inevitably they were trying to impress the people they were with by showing off how much they knew about food or wine. I've always said you can tell a lot about people by how they behave to waitstaff.

Tyger, I haven't worked in restaurants for years, but for me training was usually about halfway helpful. You learn the specifics (usually anecdotally) about how that particular place works which is useful, but you're also given a bunch of busywork instructions (sorting out condiments to folding napkins and polishing silverware) about doing those tasks correctly which frankly, IME, can be a load of crap. It's good not to shirk those tasks because you'll piss off your coworkers otherwise, but generally working the floor is the real learning curve. You'll be fine; you'll pick up the lion's share of what you need to know through experience. And yes, always ask questions if you're unsure and always admit to mistakes. You're only human. And good luck! I learned so much about dealine with people and workplace politics from waitressing.

[tyger]

i'm hoping i don't have to deal with patron testing, seeing as i'm working in an asian buffet restaurant (it's, like, mostly vietnamese with random thai stuff, and then onion rings, too.) i made, like, 4$ in tips, which is good for that kind of place (for some reason people in my town think they don't need to tip all that much at asian restaurants, unless they're the ones with sushi and stuff), and i think i had maybe 5 tables during the whole shift.

i'm just hoping i get enough hours to pay for school next year

[greenbean]

Oh boy, tyger, good luck!
All I can say is that if you make a mistake (and you will!) just apologize and make it up to your patron. People really get pissed if something goes wrong and they feel like you dont care. Also, always check on each table even if they look like everything is fine. When I started serving I felt like if my patrons looked content, I didnt want to bother them,...but I was wrong because I would get complaints that once I brought the order I never checked back to make sure they were satisified. I assumed they would just wave to me if they needed something but for the most part, people dont want to have to do that.
People will be jerks to you but you just have to grin and bear it, and save your anger for ranting on this board!

Speaking of rants....! Do you ever get those snobby patrons that like to test you? Last night a patron asked me what "maduros" meant, as he pointed to "platanos maduros" on the menu. I said it meant "sweet", and he said, "no it means ripe, but that was close!" !!! Can you believe that jerk! He was friggin testing me! grrrr.