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repletewithyou
post Apr 22 2006, 06:37 PM
Post #1


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So, there's this boy. He is a very dear friend and I've known him for years and years and last summer we fell in love. He goes to school about a thousand miles away and he didn't want to try a long distance relationship. We got back together over winter break and had sex (both of our first time); he is one of the most genuine and gentle and smart and adoring people I have ever known. BUT we talked the other day and he says he "doesn't tend to think about people much when he can't see them." I think about him all the time and it makes me sad to think he doesn't think about me.

We talked tentatively about getting back together this summer. I hate it when girls care more about their guys than their guys care about them. I don't know whether he really doesn't care about me anymore or if he is just a dumb boy with a bad memory. I'll be seeing him soon and I don't know what to do.
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badcrumble
post May 9 2006, 03:52 AM
Post #2







Hey there all. I've just popped back from the Newbies thread where I've duly introduced myself!
Pat on the back to me :-)

Since you seem like smart gals, I was hoping you could contribute some advice. (I apologise in advance if this post becomes too lengthy or if it's better suited elsewhere).

To cut a rather long story short, I found evidence of teen porn sites on my boyfriend's computer today. Now, we've had the whole 'porn' debate before when I realised that he occasionally looked at it when I wasn't around and I have various problems with it, some political and some personal. I won't bore you with the history of that at the moment, but the thing that is eating me up right now is the type of stuff he's obviously been accessing. Yes, the girls may be 18 and over, but it seems to me that the kind of sites that advertise 'teens' are filled with girls who often look even younger than that and they seem to equate childishness with sexiness. They're typically small and often dressed in 'schoolgirl chic', (pleated short skirts etc) and it just doesn't sit right with me. How can a fully grown man justify getting off to girls who look so young and what is it about that type of porn in particular?

I know he's looked at more general stuff in the past but this in particular makes me uncomfortable. While I don't truly believe he's into young kids or whatever, I feel it's a very fine line and would appreciate your opinion.

I'll be out when he gets home, so left him a letter explaining what I found and what I thought about it. I just wanted to make my points to him clearly and concisely as things will probably get heated later on.

I wish my first post on Bust was a little more lighthearted, but there you go :-(
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Posts in this topic
repletewithyou   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 22 2006, 06:37 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 22 2006, 07:28 PM
repletewithyou   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 23 2006, 07:48 AM
emtee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 12:16 AM
venusindisguise   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 08:53 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 02:42 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 05:32 PM
cloverbee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 03:04 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 04:11 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 07:47 PM
cloverbee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 08:54 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 29 2006, 07:16 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 29 2006, 11:31 PM
cloverbee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 29 2006, 11:44 PM
la_sirena   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 1 2006, 01:21 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 1 2006, 04:23 PM
yummymum   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 10:16 AM
anarch   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 10:41 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 01:17 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 02:37 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 04:20 PM
john   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 05:12 AM
sybarite   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 05:42 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 09:37 AM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 10:12 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:14 AM
lucizoe   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:43 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:51 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:55 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 12:48 PM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 12:54 PM
pow   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 01:09 PM
john   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 04:50 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 05:41 PM
john   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 06:38 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 06:52 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 06:55 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 11:36 AM
la_sirena   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 12:30 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 02:32 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 08:22 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 8 2006, 08:16 PM
badcrumble   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 9 2006, 03:52 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 9 2006, 05:43 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 9 2006, 08:52 PM
bklynhermit   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 12:58 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 01:23 AM
venetia   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 01:36 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 09:01 AM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 10:04 AM
bklynhermit   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 12:57 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 08:37 PM
venetia   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 08:55 PM
bklynhermit   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 10:25 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 11 2006, 01:01 AM
bklynhermit   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 11 2006, 10:11 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 11 2006, 04:50 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 11 2006, 04:52 PM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 12 2006, 10:25 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 12 2006, 08:08 PM
bklynhermit   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 12 2006, 10:19 PM
greenbean   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 13 2006, 12:00 PM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 13 2006, 02:03 PM
greenbean   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 13 2006, 05:23 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 16 2006, 03:37 PM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 09:06 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 09:23 AM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 09:58 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 10:55 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 01:25 PM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 02:00 PM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 02:31 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 19 2006, 11:05 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 19 2006, 02:54 PM
saktii   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 19 2006, 04:39 PM
amilita   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 19 2006, 05:40 PM
sybarite   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 20 2006, 07:50 AM
saktii   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 20 2006, 11:23 AM
_octinoxate   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 20 2006, 05:33 PM
halcyon   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 21 2006, 03:11 AM
koala   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 21 2006, 11:57 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 21 2006, 01:49 PM
_octinoxate   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 21 2006, 02:34 PM
sweetn_low   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 22 2006, 09:39 PM
saktii   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 23 2006, 02:36 PM
saktii   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 23 2006, 02:57 PM
karma77   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 23 2006, 03:59 PM
appmtnwoman   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 23 2006, 11:25 PM
karma77   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 24 2006, 05:05 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 24 2006, 09:29 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 24 2006, 09:30 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 24 2006, 11:06 AM
appmtnwoman   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 24 2006, 04:56 PM
lilacwine13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 27 2006, 01:31 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 27 2006, 05:09 PM
venetia   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 27 2006, 07:18 PM
stillveryangry   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 27 2006, 10:44 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 28 2006, 11:26 AM
maude   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 28 2006, 09:37 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 29 2006, 12:05 AM
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