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repletewithyou
post Apr 22 2006, 06:37 PM
Post #1


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So, there's this boy. He is a very dear friend and I've known him for years and years and last summer we fell in love. He goes to school about a thousand miles away and he didn't want to try a long distance relationship. We got back together over winter break and had sex (both of our first time); he is one of the most genuine and gentle and smart and adoring people I have ever known. BUT we talked the other day and he says he "doesn't tend to think about people much when he can't see them." I think about him all the time and it makes me sad to think he doesn't think about me.

We talked tentatively about getting back together this summer. I hate it when girls care more about their guys than their guys care about them. I don't know whether he really doesn't care about me anymore or if he is just a dumb boy with a bad memory. I'll be seeing him soon and I don't know what to do.
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sybarite
post May 20 2006, 07:50 AM
Post #2


it's cards on the table time
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Saktii, I agree with amilita. Have a conversation rather than demanding outright that she stay elsewhere. I understand your response and think it's a sensible one, but I do think he's trying to clean up a situation that existed before you entered his life.

Um, I once was that girl. I was seeing someone and because it was never formalised as a relationship (or not for very long) he began seeing someone else while I still believed we were on a hiatus. Then me and half-ex went on a prearranged holiday, much to her disgust. Despite spending a week with each other he never touched me. At the time I was livid he hadn't been straight with me (as was she I expect) and he has since admitted he fucked up royally. I'm mentioning this as an example of how things can spiral when they're not talked about... but also to illustrate that his intentions could easily be good, and he simply hasn't clarified things enough with her out of fear of hurting her feelings. Which is weak, but fixable.

Good luck, hope things resolve themselves soon.
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repletewithyou   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 22 2006, 06:37 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 22 2006, 07:28 PM
repletewithyou   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 23 2006, 07:48 AM
emtee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 12:16 AM
venusindisguise   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 08:53 AM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 02:42 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 24 2006, 05:32 PM
cloverbee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 03:04 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 04:11 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 07:47 PM
cloverbee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 28 2006, 08:54 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 29 2006, 07:16 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 29 2006, 11:31 PM
cloverbee   General Relationship/Dating Advice   Apr 29 2006, 11:44 PM
la_sirena   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 1 2006, 01:21 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 1 2006, 04:23 PM
yummymum   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 10:16 AM
anarch   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 10:41 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 01:17 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 02:37 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 2 2006, 04:20 PM
john   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 05:12 AM
sybarite   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 05:42 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 09:37 AM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 10:12 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:14 AM
lucizoe   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:43 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:51 AM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 11:55 AM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 12:48 PM
maddy29   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 12:54 PM
pow   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 01:09 PM
john   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 04:50 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 05:41 PM
john   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 06:38 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 06:52 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 3 2006, 06:55 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 11:36 AM
la_sirena   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 12:30 PM
jazmyn13   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 02:32 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 4 2006, 08:22 PM
maimy   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 8 2006, 08:16 PM
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pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 09:01 AM
katiebelle2882   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 10:04 AM
bklynhermit   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 12:57 PM
pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 10 2006, 08:37 PM
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pepper   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 17 2006, 10:55 AM
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sybarite   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 20 2006, 07:50 AM
saktii   General Relationship/Dating Advice   May 20 2006, 11:23 AM
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