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Full Version: Crimes of Fashion part Deux...this time, it's personal.
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missjoy
Yeah...

JoyBoy is often a COF. The only time I have said anything is when we were going out to dinner and he came down the stairs wearing a hawaiin shirt and plad shorts.

Once he grew a handlebar mustache - I think just to see how I would react to it (he came home from a few weeks away at work with it).

He does look good in his uniform though.
hellotampon
My boyfriend bought this black vest one time with squiggly leaves and shit embroidered on the front of it. Words can't do it justice, trust me, it is fucking UGLY. And he really had nothing to wear it with, so he'd wear it over a dress shirt, with his black corduroys (which I also hate) and if he was cold he'd put his red hoodie on with the zipper not all the way up so you could still see a little of the vest. Actually I don't remember ever seeing him wear it without the hoodie, probably because he was afraid to wear it in public after I made fun of it so much (I feel kinda bad now...). Right now we're cleaning out the apartment and getting rid of stuff, and when we get to the hall closet that thing is going right back to the Salvation Army where it came from.
humanist77
I saw one of the ugliest garments ever at Target yesterday. It was this icky polyester "satin" fabric, with short, poofy, tapered sleeves and a wide, square neck, and a sort of 'bib' around the collar. The worst part were the colors the shirt came in. One was shiny ROYAL BLUE, and the bib was black. The other one was shiny black with a BROWN bib. Brown and black rarely goes together, and this was far from any exception. Royal blue is rarely flattering to any human-and the black collar made it even worse. I wish I could find a picture of the shirts on the website, but I couldn't-so here's a similar one-and almost as ugly. The sleeves on this shirt were tapered though, and it was some fake satin fabric.

I went on a rant to the boy about how awful it was, how I can't believe anyone would design and approve the thing, and especially how anyone could buy one! He agreed that it was just about one of the most hideous things ever. We stood there just gawking in disgust at the thing tongue.gif
ginger_kitty
humanist, eewww...that's not pretty! Target has really gone to hell, over the last couple years. I used to love to shop there.

misjoy, my hubby has done the handlebar mustache thing also, just for laughs....but he looked pretty tough with it. I giggled everytime I saw it.

Cof 1: Teenage guy wearing a jeans and a t-shirt. The crime being that the t-shirt said retro in big letters.....what the hell was 'retro'? Just because retro cloths are in, doesn't mean the word retro should be printed in large letters on a shirt.

Cof 2: At the grocery, I spotted an entire family of five sporting various colors of crocs. Mom in purple, dad in bright neon green....and so on. It was very unsightly.
flanker_ji
Maimy, word.

The people I know who need a little help in the fashion dept. always seem to be the sweetest, and I can't bear to call them CoFs. Who they are really does transform them physically in my eyes too.

I was also going to post about Crocs, but I see the topic's been well-covered. Glad I'm not alone in my dislike of those things.
maimy
Humanist, it's funny you say that - I was watching Age of Love last night (okay, y'all can get into what a crime THAT is too ... heh), and one of the "kittens" wore this royal blue satin getup for whatever they thought they were doing (it really wasn't an elimination or ceremony or anything Reality TV has led us to expect ...), and it was wrong in so many different ways.

Why do so many of the plastic girls who live to be on Reality TV seem to have such unerringly bad wardrobe? Is it the shows' fault (see also: Joe Millionaire), or their own (see also: Melrose from ANTM) ... ? There seem to be so many sources for Teh Bad Fashion, and so few good influences, in that milieu.

Yes, I was forced to use the word MILIEU. THAT. Is how bad Reality TV fashion has become.

*Shudder*
mornington
girl on the tube last night... pink cargo-style capris, pink quilted pleather "designer" knockoff handbag, pink mini ipod. All in exactly the same shade of pink... bright retina-burning pink. Plus ubiquitous over-straightened blonde hair.
culturehandy
Why do people think it is appropriate to wear an entire outfit made out of an obscenely bright colour.

*vomits*

I saw this a while ago, but there was someone wearing an entire outfit of camouflage, but the thing is the pants did not match the shirt. So it was two toned differing colours of green camo. It was awful and busy. Very very busy.
bustygirl
IMO, the handlebar mustache is right on. Sexy in a Tom of Finland way.

Even better is the handlebar mustache combined with muttonchops. Very Founding Fathers.
crazyoldcatlady
black sparkly clubbing top with bell sleeves and cut outs on the arms

with

khakis.

in

a hosptial pharmacy, working behind the counter.
flanker_ji
QUOTE(crazyoldcatlady @ Aug 3 2007, 03:21 PM) *
black sparkly clubbing top with bell sleeves and cut outs on the arms

with

khakis.

in

a hosptial pharmacy, working behind the counter.


Oh my...
freckleface7
spotted:
man w/ a highlighted or frosted blond mullet.
even my girl recognized it from billy ray cyrus (who plays hannah montana's dad (duh) on the tv show of the same name, where they frequently make jokes about the style in a nice way.

sad or weirdest thing is, it looked freshly coiffed.

humanist77
oh my god oh my god I found the awful royal blue and brown and black polyester silk shirts (and then some) from Target! AHHHHHH!

Here is the hideous royal blue one,
and the hideous black and brown one,
but don't forget the hideous yellow polka-dotted shirt,
and the hideous purple plaid shirt
don't forget to click on the larger image link to see them in detail tongue.gif

lord have mercy ohmy.gif
those models are smiling, but they're crying on the inside. And they're eyes are not shown so they can remain anonymous~
freckleface7
QUOTE(humanist77 @ Aug 5 2007, 02:12 AM) *
oh my god oh my god I found the awful royal blue and brown and black polyester silk shirts (and then some) from Target! AHHHHHH!

Here is the hideous royal blue one,
and the hideous black and brown one,
but don't forget the hideous yellow polka-dotted shirt,
and the hideous purple plaid shirt
don't forget to click on the larger image link to see them in detail tongue.gif

lord have mercy ohmy.gif
those models are smiling, but they're crying on the inside. And they're eyes are not shown so they can remain anonymous~

homanist-
the models are smiling bc maybe they had to get them high, and convince them they were playing an integrel part of a massive joke on Suzi Q Public in order to don them in the first place.

those look like circa '70's maternity shirts gone very wrong.
mornington
you know, I've been seeing that style of top over here for a while now. They don't get any less fugly, but those are especially specially fugly.
starkitty
I'm wondering what figure that could possibly hope to flatter. Unless, you know, it was actually a maternity shirt. And it would still be ugly and unflattering in that case anyway.
humanist77
I made sure to leave honest reviews about the first two shirts...
mouse
i actually really like the polka dot one. i like the cut, i think it's cute and vintage-y and i would wear it. but the others do not look good. it only works if it's all the same fabric and an okay print (that purple plaid is gross. but i hate purple anyway)...and of course this is only if it wasn't fake silk gross polyester. i would wear it if it were just regular woven blouse fabric.

and i think the right guy can pull off an elaborate moustache...


i saw a lot of COFs at the comic con last weekend (mainly people wearing spandex who never, ever should), but the worst was a girl wearing a pair of crocs......with SOCKS. isn't their main thing that you can wear them barefoot and they won't get smelly? isn't that one of their damn selling points? i never thought that crocs could look worse but APPARENTLY IF YOU WEAR THEM WITH SOCKS THEY CAN.

i also had a dream that i got a pair of crocs and was okay with wearing them. i am surprised i didn't wake up screaming.
humanist77
the yellow one is the least ugly of them all-but definitely not my thang. It would earn a couple points if it weren't that nasty cheap fabric~

yeah, this woman in one of my spring classes wore crocs with socks everyday. She worked in a hospital, but it still hardly excused it...
culturehandy
My eyes! Ohhhhh my eyes.
culturehandy
Oh dear, what has the world come to?

I was out shopping yesterday and I saw that they make croc boots! and and and I am watching a business report on CBC newsworld right now, and croc stocks hae gone up and crocs say they want to branch into clothing!!!!!!!!!

Ummm, there is already a lot of rubber clothes out there. It is made for fetishists. But gaaaaa croc clothing????

*promptly throws up*
dayglowpink
I am a nurse, and tons of the people I work with wear Crocs with socks. It's bad. The worst is shorts with Crocs and socks, though. Hideous. I also really hate it when people wear white athletic-type low cut socks (like the kind that just come up to the foot-ankle junction) with clogs. What is the deal with that? It seems to happen a lot with nurses and doctors as well. It looks stupid, and the point of those socks is to wear with sneakers. If you're wearing clogs, you need to wear regular socks or no socks. And no white athletic socks with black or brown leather clogs.
shinyx3
aaack! jut had a mental image of neon and camo colored croc clothes in fetish styles being worn at walmart by shoppers!
maimy
(Humanist, I adore your thoroughness in making sure to leave reviews!)

The tops are not flattering, but in simple colors at least they're inoffensive, if a little distracting perhaps. It's the dresses like that which have me completely flummoxed. Flattering to PRECISELY no body type, intentionally manufactured in heavy, baggy, unattractive twills and unforgiving "retro" fabrics (and all too often with intentionally-hideous RICKRACK on them!!!!), they are in-your-face ugly, and I can't agree with the sense of "edginess" (or even "humor" ... ??) which insists upon unappealing-as-awesome. And the less attractive, the more inexplicably expensive.

I remember the very early seventies, and I remember women having to wear broadly-drawn, unattractive shit like that because they were pregnant and sewed their own clothes, but didn't have the energy, money, or time to invest in good materials or workmanship. I have WORN the boxy fucking dresses handed down to me as a kid by the (I'm sorry) fat girl up the street. Her mom dressed her like a frump at the age of SIX, and I can actually remember the contrast between the joy of "you're getting some hand-me-downs from TJ" (she was stylin' out of K-Mart, y'all) versus the letdown of "you're getting some hand-me-downs from ADB" (did I mention the cruelty of pre-teen frump? did I mention that??). There isn't a power on earth, and I include hallucinogenics, strong enough to make me pay $300 for the brand of ugly which scarred my childhood years.

And there isn't a power on earth which will prevent all the moron girls wearing this shit today - for a premium! - from receiving, all unknowing, the scorn and derision of a generation who had to be there, and who "know better" by now. Haute has these chicks wearing the Emperor's tacky-assed threads. And I know it's not the first time. But it's one of the most glaring examples of Dumbass Chic I have ever witnessed. Even worse than crocs. Even worse than hockey-stick "contouring" blush.
humanist77
Maimy, my heart goes out to you tongue.gif

Marlene from Vegas seems to think that my rage is out of control...and that polyester satin is perfect for the summer heat...and that these particular blouses are adorable if worn correctly...Marlene doesn't get a tongue-in-cheek statement, perhaps?

ETA~dammit! I can only leave one review per item!
llamas
Today is apparently bleach-your-eyeballs day at my office...
First, a woman wearing a tunic top and capri-length leggings (bad enough, right?) with the same kind of chunky high-heeled loafers that I wore with my school uniform in the 90s.

Then a largeish gal in a pink floral print polyester dress that I'm fairly sure was actually meant to be a shirt, what with the combination of long bell sleeves and very short length and all. With very high heeled sandals.

On a more positive note, the very fashion-challenged mr. llamas and I went to a movie on Sunday, and on the way out he asked me, "What's with all the stupid rubber shoes?" Meaning Crocs, of course...I was so proud.
freckleface7
I have a CoF color question:

olive green w/ navy blue ? (olive shirt w/navy shorts, navy polo w/ olive dockers)

I say no, and was downright nasty when I snapped at the mr in the heat of an argument over something else and that came out, so now he's quiet & covertly wearing it ALL THE TIME in various combinations.
blink.gif
hellotampon
I actually like 70s prints and the kinda Nicole Richie-type cuts they have these days. Then again you have to be anorexic-looking to wear them, and you certainly can't have big boobs like mine. So I usually have to buy old 70s shirts from the salvation army and use them to make accents for my regular-fitting clothes. I hate those shirts that Humanist posted. The fabric is pretty hideous and if you're going to wear something that big and baggy, then the neckline better be really low... even the model looks big in those shirts.

Yesterday I saw a girl in black gauchos with a white tanktop over a light brown spaghetti strap top (the two shirts blended into this horribly dingy color), WHITE TIGHTS, and suede birkenstock clogs.
culturehandy
tights under gauchos? Doesn't that defeat the purpose. I mean if you want to wear long pants, then wear long pants. Not both. Ick!
flanker_ji
I don't mind olive and navy together, myself.

I gotta admit, your mr.'s clever revenge tactic makes me laugh, freckle!
mouse
i still maintain that i actually really like the cut and if it were different fabric it would work. but the fake poly stuff just makes it look badly made and cheap. i saw a girl wearing the navy blue/black shirt and it looked bad on her. sad.gif but she was kind of a CoF allover. she kind of looked like she might've been a bustie type though--someone needs to show her the error of her ways.


i think olive and navy together is kind of classic, but boring. but then again i am a girl who wears combinations like red and turquoise and loves it. i am kind of obsessed with color...
llamas
Eh, I'm not a big fan of olive green and navy. Too drab. But kelly green and navy, hells yeah.

And the whole short pants/tights thing must be an epidemic, as today someone at my office is wearing green capris with white trouser socks and black clogs.
culturehandy
I hate tights. I fucking can't stand them. They are not suitable for the office.
dayglowpink
??? culturehandy, what kind of tights are you talking about? I wear tights all the time with dresses and skirts in the winter. I think they're very appropriate for the office. I'm confused!
coela


* A hefty Goth guy (about BMI 40), hair dyed black and growing out blond, black tank top, black combat shorts and BOOTS WITH METAL PLATES.
I mean, come on, don't they make Goth sandals? Goth flip-flops? Goth CROCS, even? I swear, it would have been better.

* Beautiful redhaired woman with pale skin and lots of freckles in a Very loud hot pink/turquoise/yellow/blue sundress (60s style, but trés ugly),
which really didn't complement her great skin at all, and was too big for her, and the SHITTIEST white bra I've ever seen under it.
Not just the bra straps, but the whole thing, since the dress was backless. I don't have a problem with bra straps showing, but the whole thing?
Well ok then if it was a sports bra or a bikini looking bra, but this was an ICKY, yellowish/dishwater coloured, granny style bra,
and she was at a restaurant having dinner with her friends (as was I - however, not in an icky bra). It's a casual restaurant, it was a hot day and
we were all sitting outside, but still.

* Hefty indie pop girl in cute outfit but much too narrow ballerinas. Her feet we're protruding all over the shoe edges.
I know what it's like to have swollen feet, my feet swell horribly when it's hot and I work in front of the computer all day,
and I wouldn't wear shoes which emphasize that. Also, I'm guessing it doesn't feel all that comfortable when your feet are twice the size of your shoes.





ananke
Olive green crocs with fluro pink socks.

*dies on the inside*
raisingirl
QUOTE(hellotampon @ Aug 8 2007, 12:19 PM) *
Yesterday I saw a girl in black gauchos with a white tanktop over a light brown spaghetti strap top (the two shirts blended into this horribly dingy color), WHITE TIGHTS, and suede birkenstock clogs.


You never know, maybe she's a dancer and was on her way to/from a dance studio where white or pink tights are de rigeur for ballet.
LustfullyPink
Dayglowpink, perhaps she means when they are worn as pants. We get that a lot around these parts, and it's disgusting. Just like a babytee and tights. I'm afraid if I look too closely, I'll see some pubes sticking out.

By the way. Does anyone remember those atrocious egg-crate stretchy shirts that were HUGE in like 1999? I saw a girl wearing a red one of those with get this...

Brown Gauchos and...

Crocs.

Are you kidding me?! I was like "Now really. That's just rude."

Those shirts were so awful.
culturehandy
That is exactly it, tights worn as pants is not appropriate for work.

It looks even worse when it is combined with an oversized shirt worn as a dress and some horrible looking 80's belt.

Blech!

Ananke, even thinking about that combo makes me want to vomit.

flanker_ji
Where is it ok to wear tights as pants and oversized t-shirts to work??
culturehandy
I am just curiuos when it became socially acceptable to dress so slovenly at work??? I get it if you work in construction or as a mechanic, but when you work in government or something, it is not okay to wear your pajamas or tights with a tshirt and belt! Come one!

There is one woman whom I've seen who wears the rattiest shorts and large t shirts, I understand that she is overweight, but it is not appropriate.

And since when did not wearing a bra become so acceptable??? I do not need to see your nipples at work!
lilacwine13
The only places I can think of where wearing t-shirts with tights to work are acceptable is Urban Outfitters or American Apparel, but even then you're going to look like you forgot something.

I think the dress code has become relaxed at a lot of places, and others don't bother to enforce it. At my current job there is a dress code on the books that forbids jeans, strappy tank tops, and flip-flops, which is understandable and doable. Imagine my surprise when a coworker showed up to work one day in a white strappy tank top, green capris made out of sweatshirt material, and rainbow, platform flip-flops, yet nobody said anything. (This woman is at least 50, which didn't help matters.)
dayglowpink
Oh are ya'll talking about leggings? I hope people are not wearing regular tights with nothing else. Leggings are bad enough. I don't like the "cool" American Apparel style of wearing them, either. Occasionally under skirts they might look okay, but it has gotten way too played out these days anyway.
knorl05
sooooo i didnt know where else to put this.. but check out this clothing line my girl just introduced me to. i'm sure many or some of you hip busties already know about it but thought i'd pass it along anyway. per my girl "they only use organically grown cotten and their clothes value environment, comfort and creativity over trends and size zeros."

lUF it
freckleface7
seen from the back at a charity run/walk event this morning:

a man w/ so- much - back hair -I thought he was wearing a shirt and
he
wasn't.

he was also wearing some sort of black elastic band across his back too, probably holding something in the front, but I didn't care to see any more of him than I already had to find out what.

being the good mother I am, I shielded my frecklette from the horrors of it.

lots of other great & small CoF's there, mainly involving spandex shorts of various kinds & styles;
I was my own CoF by donning the shirt they gave everyone, bc it's a blood red (event was for the Red Cross) and red makes me look ghastly, all super washed out like I am dead.
freckleface7
today's 1st CoF :

woman in paneled (sectioned) cotton jeanie-type pants-- - red w/ gold paisely // black w/ paisely //red//black ballooning at the ankels. worn w/ a tight tied off at one end bottom t-shirt w/ some sort of dark red printing logo on it, and black open toed ballerina flats.

only saw her from behind, but her flat yet saggy derrier was seriously unattractive.
made me wish my phone camera wasn't out of memory right now so I could snap it for all of you here.

this was so bad that I made my mr head to another isle end to try to catch her bc he hadn't noticed her, and then when he saw it he said " OH!" and I explained the whole Cof thing here and he thought about it a second and said " I saw 2 men at the airport wearing those Croc shoes... With Socks!!"

the boy is a'learning fast ! smile.gif

2nd CoF: if it's a permenent fixture , do Big HUGE Fake Boobs count?
we saw an older woman say maybe mid 50's, petite, might have been all of a size 2, w/ enormous, gravity defying boobs.
easily a 48-something bra and cup size.
she looked like a smaller, ickier version of Dolly Parton.

culturehandy
There is even a crackbook group about how stupid crocs look.
tankgirl
i saw a 8 (ish) year old boy in PURPLE crocs the other day... EW.
hellotampon
Espadrilles and a pair of cargo pants with elastic ankles and a ruffle at the bottom.
nickclick
elastic? ruffles? no. and no.

i have an anti-COF to report. my boss. she's an almost-60 cool lady. i walked into the office this morning with her. she's wearing these sharp kinda zebra-print sunglasses and as always, awesome craft fair scarf and jewelry. oh, and she always takes notes in meetings on a hello kitty notepad. i want to be her when i grow up. well, either her or mrs. roper.
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