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margot
I saw it said voting closed too. I think it opens on the 1st July.

Good luck Bustygirl!
ps,how do I know you won't spend the dosh on cocktails and cha-cha heels?
bustygirl
I'm sorry, the voting doesn't start until tomorrow. I jumped the gun. But then you can vote, and I really appreciate it if you do!

I would NEVER spend my child's money on anything but my child. I have enough money for myself, but paying for college is another thing altogether. ;)
moxiegirl
College...interesting topic. We almost sent moxette's pics to gerber...she's a cutie too. Eddie is AWESOMELY cute! Both big and little Eddie!

College...we started a trust (529) fund for moxette. Its good anywahere accross the country, so long as the instituion she chooses takes public financing. We figure $50/month isn't too much at all to sock away. And, its automatically deducted from my paycheck, so we don't even notice its gone.
bustygirl
Voting starts today! Yay!
click HERE to vote!
chinichin
I voted! Gah he is indeed awesomely cute :-) Good luck BG!

We've just started bodge on solid foods. Well it's been about two weeks I guess. Gone are the days of the innocuously liquidy and benign poops, I must say.

Money, money, money. Good for you guys on starting now - we plan to do the same (with the Canadian equivalent). I am having some trouble adjusting to my ... place in the scheme of things. We talk about having another baby but I'm having problems seeing how I am going to deal with the money issues. I want to go back to work at some point, and I want to use the break to change careers ... but I don't know how it will work. It's stressing me.
moxiegirl
chin- have you thought about maybe seeing a life coach of some sort? I've a couple of friends who went through something similar, and the coach really helped them clairfy their own desires and create a plan to achieve them.

How old is bodge? we're discussing when to start the solids...moxette is only 3 mos, so its not for a while, regardless. We figure the later, the better, with flexibility to her interst after 4 mos.
chani
Very cute! Goodness me!
tart
OMG, Busty - what a honey! I especially like the sweet doe-eyed baby/punk rocker dad dichotomy...

Ugh. First day back at work. It's only 7:45 & already my boobs hurt. Tartlet was at least a major cutie this morning and ver cooperative with our new house schedule. Thank god I'm not the one dropping him off at daycare...

And thanks, Mox - so, the arranged marriage is still on, then? ;)
moxiegirl
So, yeah, Tart...its moxette's first day of daycare today, too. We have WORK to do, right? Right? (gulps to self)...moxette was a doll, too. She spit up on me at daycare drop-off, but it was my fault for "jiggly legs" right after she ate. Whoops.

Oh, yes, tartlette and moxette will be matched. Even if I have to beat off little daycare-buddy who took an immediate interest in my girl. :-)
mirabella
I know I'm a little late on this, but wow, tart...he is adorable. so tiny and perfect!!

I voted for baby Eddie, busty!! Good Luck!
tart
Thanks, Mirabella!

Our little guy got his first piece of mail yesterday - his Social Security card... Tartlet is now official!
farmgirl
Congrats to tartlette! How are the newest bustie babes doing with daycare? I hope all is going well!

Quite the snazzy new lounge, I must say!

Happy Tuesday, everyone!
moxiegirl
So, yeah, daycare. It was HARD leaving moxette on the first day, but once I got over myself and remembered why we chose this place, I was cool. The teachers are awesome, there's a ton of play stuff, individual cribs. The other babies are funny, and I can say with confidence that my babe is both better tempered and cuter than most infants. Moxette loves being with the other kids, too. I think my little aeries is showing her colors already! She's got the requisite daycare sniffles, and she's been a bit more needy at home in the evenings...both were to be expected. A little shift in bedtime is taking care of the needyness...and time will get the sniffles.

How's tartlette faring?
mirabella
I was so nervous about putting my daughter into daycare at first, but now I love it. She's only 10 months old and they have her finger painting and yesterday they made a construction paper ice cream cone using cutout s of her traced hand as the scoops. (Does that make sense? It's hard to explain.) She seems a little upset when I leave in the morning, but then she gets to go wild with other little kids for a couple hours.

I loved it when Emma got mail for the first time!
tart
Ah, Tartlet's taking it like a champ! If anything, I think he's thriving on the structure & social interaction - he's been much more chatty this past week, and is napping much more regularly. I don't have to drop him off, which is nice, but I do get to "rescue" him at the end of the day... We take a nice walk home, have a little comfort nurse (more for my comfort, I suspect), a bit of playtime where he shrieks with joy that his little stuffed bluebird has not forsaken him, a bath or massage, supper & bed. He's out like a light, every night without fail! (knock on wood...) You're right, Mox - it's so nice not to worry about them during the day. Now all I have to do is pump at work - very entertaining in my office full of men... tongue.gif

Here's a question for the ladies with babes on the bottle - how much is your niblet eating a day? I'm estimating Tartlet's taking in about 36 oz a day, split pretty evenly between breastmilk (boob & bottle) & formula. It seems like a lot for a 3-month-old, but it's not coming out his ears or anything...
moxiegirl
tart- that's about what moxette eats each day. She's all formula, and I did stop counting precisely, but its 32-36. She's only 2 weeks older than tartlette, so that seems about right. My book says babies tend to top out at 40 oz a day on bottles by about 4 mos old, but i don't think she's gonna hit that.

I only took her the first day to daycare. Moxieman does that part. I'm the picker-upper. I like being the picker upper.
chinichin
Hi Mox smile.gif sorry for the late reply, bodge is a busy girl. And loud. Ai Yah.

We weren't really planning to start her on solids until 6 months, but she was so interested in our food and she started grabbing for stuff on our plates, so we decided to start a bit early - just after the 5 month mark. I'm being pretty cautious because I had food allergies as a kid. So far we have success with rice and oat pablum, and we've tried carrots, peas, and sweet potato. She doesn't seem to like the veg but it may be a texture thing.

Thanks for the suggestion about the life coach - I think that's a good idea and I wouldn't have thought of it myself. I think I have a bunch of issues all tied in a bundle and I have trouble separating them enough to think clearly about what matters.
noof
[font=Comic Sans Ms][color=#CC66CC]Just wanted to cruise into the new Lounge! tongue.gif Looks faboo!

Noofling is doing well and I'm seven weeks along with Noofling 2.0!
bebesho2
Anyone remember me? I had to resign up (note the 2 now!) which sucks being I have been here for 5 years or more now!

I occasionally lurked but had lulled on posting. I been thru a few jobs and a daycare horror story. And my Dad died. Oh it goes on! My "baby"is gonna be 5 now (September)-I so remember posting here when I THOUGHT I might be prego with him!

I just wanted to pop in and say HI! And well , Iwill share my daycare nightmare sometime if interested...All I can say is follow all instincts and keep your guard up always!
mirabella
Hmm...I'm interested in a daycare horror story, I guess. Though I'm scared it might make me rather paranoid.
chinichin
BEBESHO!! I am happy to see you! I am a mom now too smile.gif

(sorry for thread derailment) Bebesho, we had to restart the "suntan" thread over in F&F - it's now called "colour commentary." I need tips on parenting mixed-race kids so I hope you pop in there when you can!
bebesho2
HI! Chini..well CONGRATS first of all-have I been gone that long?!?! It has been a fucked year I tell ya! I barely post anywhere but I lurk occasionally on all my old spots!


Ok..I will summarize my horror story t othe best of my abilities. Expect typos, I got my son by my side driving me nutty right now~! For those who do not know me, I have a 9yo DD and a soon to be 5yo DS. When DD was small we had a few "minor" daycare issues. I just took her out and moved on. (Neglectful sitter, etc.) The last 2 she had kicked ass! I was so lucky (I only changed b/c I moved.) I never worried at all.

So DS was at home with the man, we both need to work to survive here. And DS really needed to got out. He is a wild little guy and I knew it be good for him. Now we have had issues with him but ..well keep reading...lol So a few people mentioned headstart. I had my qualms but gave in and checked it out. It is for low income families-that would be us! So the positive is it was completely free, included meals, bus to and from, etc. The core of teh program SOUNDS great, but from day one I was iffy about teh staff. Many seemed miserable, not all tha teducated, full of attitude, etc. I also did not liek how government run it is. Very invasive. Technically, they were to come to all students homes, but teh ynever did it so I decided to try it out. The first week there were red flags. DS "missed"the bus once... IOget a call to get him! I work a distance and said HOW COULD HE MISS IT? HE is 3yo and NEW. The person on the phone said "He was hiding and it was his responsibiltiy to get on!"WTF? She then said she only gets paid to X time so I better get there! I complaiend but needed this place s ogave it a chance. Teh complaint was ignored. I also mentioned he was scared and his teacher never attempted ot say shit to him when I was there.. Btu I held onm..and within 2 weeks HE LOVED IT! The clincher was he was the MODEL child there, nevr acts up, etc. Completely different from home, so I convinced myself it was doing him good. Issues persisted at times, but I wrote notes (they usually came back home...grrr...) and called in.The lady I spoke to I felt yessed me or lied ot me-which was proven true in the end!

Fast forward to around January this year (he had started in May 2005). DS starts acting a bit funny. Acting up worse at home. I take away cartoon network privileges. I take his cars whe nhe continuously launched them at our heads. He seems mroe upset than normal. Come February he is wild still and says more odd stuff. Soon he is tellign us we are BAD parents, jus tcrazy shit. then I gta call from his "teacher"Whoa? I do not know this woman as his teacher. I learn this woman came int ohis class in January. She calsl my house whil I a mat work and the man answers. She refuses to speak to hi m(in the MFer I hate you way). He calls me a twork, I call her and she says to get to the school . I fly out of my new job (second time now) and meet her. She has such a horribly nature. She sits me down and says DS claiimed crazy shit was done to him. Said it was DH. I quickly realize what he was talking about. He was pissed we were not letting him go nuts and DH told him if he did not astop hitting his sister the cops would come (you know, silly desperate comments you say as parents). DS had no marks of course as he was not touched And his claims were soooo far fetched. I talk to her and she basically is saying men are evil and I am lucky she did nto call CPS! I was a mess! DS seemed so sad when I saw him. Oh, she also said that my son told her some stuff-which I had discussed with his teacher -well who I had KNOWN as his teacher and been meeting wit hall along (long story not really bad lol) She claiemd DS never said anythign odd at school and all! thsi woman who called me told me KIDS NEVER LIE and TELL HER EVERYTHING!

Anyway, DS was now coming home saying this woman told him we were all kinds of stuff. Said he was bruised (never was). She actually TOLD the child he had bruises! WTF? I began meeting with staff whome I was told did nto exist with the other complaints I had made. Meanwhile, the NEWS is coming our with all the claims other parents had against his school and CPS was investigating the SCHOOL. Hmmmm... I meet with everyone including teh head honschos for the program. I even go to meetigns to improve teh school. I cal ldauily-check on him. I speak to teacher I had always known. She says nothign is odd. DS comes hoe mand says this evil woman told him more things! I call all needed and tell teh school he may never be back. I agree to a meeting mid week. I go and for some reason say he can come back. Less than 2 days later CPS is at my door. I FREAKIN LOST IT! The social worker was shocked i knew what the deal was. Icalled the school and flipped on those i had met with (lol wrong thing to do but I did it!) The ywere like "Oh we had no idea...blah blah!"I said " I met with you, told you she trheatened me wit hCPS< etc. "The yjus tBS'd more. The Social worker actually said HE understands if I take hi motu immediately-I flew to the school . I told his teacher ( the one who always said all was fine) how angry and honestly hurt and betrayed I was. I entrusted her with my child!)

Anyway, the case was closed But Now DS is home, misses his friends, is now afraid of goinmg to any other school. He says crazy stuff whenever we say no now (will claim he was hit, saus he is afraid...weird stuff-we know she coached him). My Dad died the day after this all came to play and tha thas affedted him as well.

There is more to the crazy shit that they did..but I have no case unless i wanna put us all on the spot. So many people I meet say they have similar horror stories...

Just be careful...follow your gut. And I may delete this in a few days...


moxiegirl
ugh- bebesho- what a horrible thing! I am very grateful that moxette's daycare is great- the babies are all happy, and she is WORN OUT at the end of the day. And I know she naps, cause the couple times I've dropped in, she's been out like a light! I was really nervous at first- a good friend of mine, who's son is 2 years older than my daughter, had a really scary thing happen at daycare. His first day (at 8 weeks old), his dad dropped him off in the morning. No problem. In the evening, mom comes to pick him up- she hadn't met the PM teachers yet. Sonny was the last kid there, but the teacher just handed this 8 week old baby to the mom, saying "Oh, you must be here for Sonny..." No ID, no introductions, no sign-in for pick up. That was the last day at that place! Can you imagine. Yesterday, I went to pick up moxette, and a new teacher had started. Even though everyone else knows me, she still eyed me up. GOOD!

So, this is odd, by my pediatrician is in Lebannon right now. He was suppposed to be back yesterday- visiting his aging mother there in summertime. Moxette has a cold, and I need to call the dr. I mean, he has a colleage covering his sick-baby visits, but I really, really, really hope he made it out. Or makes it out. He's there with his 3 little kids. Gah. Stupid wars.
tart
I second Moxie's "ugh", Bebesho! What a miserable experience... isn't it great how us lower-income families get such prime childcare options? (insert sarcasm here) It's bad enough we don't have the luxury of not working, but to have to worry about our kids' welfare besides...

That said, we're pretty thrilled with our set-up so far. We were very, very lucky to find such an affordable, but safe daycare - by all rights, we should be paying a good bit more for the care & attention Tartlet gets.

My only peeve at the moment is that the ladies are convinced we need to change his formula... We have Tartlet on about 1/2 breastmilk & 1/2 formula at daycare (I simply cannot pump enough at work - too many distractions, not enough time). He's always been a bit of a spitter, but has upped the ante in the past few days, needing 2-3 changes of clothing while I'm at work. I suspect it's because he's wolfing down his bottles - he's leisurely enough on the boob, but the bottle apparently demands to be sucked down in record time. (The 3-month growth spurt is due any day now, as well...) The ladies are convinced that a change of formula is needed, but the doc disagrees, and I say he was fine for weeks before, so a sensitivity/allergy is unlikely at this point.

I'm trying to encourage them to slow down his feedings a bit, burp him a LOT, maybe offer smaller doses at each sitting. They're giving it the college try, but I can tell they'd be much happier if we tried a new formula... Would it be evil to say we did, but secretly keep his formula the same? I'm kidding, really, but it is tempting.

Meanwhile, we have 2 new favorite things in the house: a Bumbo seat, and a box of textured link rings. Tartlet's neck is getting stronger by the day, and he's really starting to dig sitting up like a big boy. We put the seat on the kitchen table, so we can all sit face-to-face, and he gets all serious and focused. The rings are a huge hit, as he can stuff the ends in his mouth, along with his fist, and gum away quite happily. 3 or 4 linked together make enough noise to keep him occupied for a good 10 minutes...

I can't believe by little guy's 3 months already. We had our first big wardrobe rotation, and I'm stunned at how much doesn't fit anymore...

ETA: Sorry your sweetie's under the weather, Mox - hope her cough gets better...
damona
congrats noof!!!! yay for nooflings!

hi bebesho! i remember you from, way back when (i used to be celtickitty21). that really IS a horror story... yikes.

my 5 year old got kicked out of daycare. yes, i am the mother of a child who was asked to leave DAYCARE. i'm so proud... <sigh> /sarcasm he apparently was not following the rules for playing outside, going in the neighbors yard and stuff, so he was told he was restricted to the house. this is all fine with me, little z can have a hellacious attitude lately and the daycare lady has my permission for time outs, etc. so he's in the house and he's mad, so he starts trying to pick fights with the older kids. he couldn't get anyone to fight with him, so he started getting physically aggressive and ended up by kicking the daycare lady's son... in his arm that he broke a few days before.

yeah, my kid is a total barbarian. he was grounded to his room for the whole next day and the house for a week after that, but it hasn't seemed to make much impression. i don't know how to handle this behaivior from him. my oldest is a smart mouthed little monster sometimes, but he wasn't usually physical the way little z is.

i started him seeing a child psych and this guy is saying that he may be adhd like my oldest, but since he is also developmentally delayed (testing is consistantly 12-18 months behind his peer group) he just expresses it physically instead of verbally. which is no excuse for kicking other kids in my book, but i'm really not to sure what to do! any ideas....?
squidmo
Hi there! I am just a few months away from being a mom, so I will probably be posting in here more often in the (shockingly near) future, but I wanted to share about an awesome children's book I picked up. It's called [i]Sleeping Bobby[i] and it is like Sleeping Beauty only with the gender roles reversed. The illustrations are good, too. I've already started quite a library, but that has to be one of the most fun books I have picked up. If anybody else has a recomendation for children's books (or good books for moms) I would love to hear about them. Thanks!
farmgirl

(((((damona & little z))))) I wish I had some advice. I hope the psych can help him find a more "appropriate" outlet.

squidmo, Welcome! Off the top of my head, good for kids:

*King and King by Stern Nijland & Linda De Haan
*Kind and King and Family
*Zen Shorts
*The Shaman's Apprentice by Lynne Cherry (I lived for 3 years in the country this one's about...) also: I Lost My Arrow in the KanKan Tree, and The Great Kapok Tree
*Sears' children's books, e.g. Eat Healthy, Feel Great (Sears and "Attachment Parenting" can be controversial, but I agree with much of his approach)
*Possum Magic by Mem Fox (actually, I tend to like a lot of her stuff--see also: Whoever You Are, and Harriet, You'll Drive Me Wild!)
*The Paperbag Princess
*Anything by Allen Say--Kamishibai Man always makes me cry...

Good for moms:

*Anything by Ariel Gore
*The Mask of Motherhood by Maushart
*The Big Rumpus by Ayun Halliday (her 'zine was pretty fun, too, but sort of lost some of it's zing for me after her husband won a Tony...)
*Circle Round by Starhawk
*Mothers Who Think: Tales of Real-Life Parenthood
*Lesbians Raising Sons by Jess Wells (you don't have to be a lesbian to appreciate the essays in this one--many are more about feminist issues, rather than lesbian-specific ones)
moxiegirl
squid- these aren't great "stories" by any means, but my infant daughter loves:

1. Are you my mother?
2. Mr. Brown can Moo, can You?

They're easy books to read through and eat!
tart
Hiya Squidmo! Oh golly, where to start?

-The Story of Ferdinand (the Bull)
-Snowy Day, or just about anything by Ezra Jack Keats
-A Boy & his Bunny
-Anything by Eric Carle
-Richard Scarry, especially What Do People Do All Day?
-Toot & Puddle
-If you can find them, the Barbapapa books (originally in French, I think - a big benevolent pink blob and his happy family)

I've taken to reading to Tartlet when we get home from daycare and have a quick comfort nurse - he's rarely hungry, but it's a nice quiet time to reconnect. I've also started singing to him this silly song I've made up to the tune of Buffalo Gals... it either cracks his shit up or puts him to sleep, both of which I can handle!

Meanwhile, it must be going around, Mox - Tartlet's got a cold now. He coughed all night, but miraculously didn't wake up at all - we had to rouse him for his midnight feed & for breakfast. He's starting to snot & snurgle, which shouldn't make me laugh as hard as it does... bad bad mama. Any curatives to recommend?

(((Damona))) I wish I had some good advice for you... all I can say is take a deep breath & keep loving your little barbarian. It sounds like he's got energy to spare - maybe get him enrolled in a tot's martial arts class. He'll probably enjoy the banging around, and the discipline might help him focus his energy better. (not suggesting you can't/don't discipline him - you know what I mean...) My sis was a raging terror for much of her childhood, but once she was treated for ADHD & joined colorguard in junior high, she suddenly calmed down. My folks really wish they'd looked into both a lot sooner...
moxiegirl
tart- three things for the cold/cough:
1. if he's really snotty at night, have him sleep in the bouncy chair, swing or carseat...helps drainiage.
2. Ocean Spray/Little Noses saliene drops for the nose- clears those sinuses right out (think baby version of neti pot)
3. Baby tylenol cold (or dimetapp, or whatever). Has helped moxette sleep better each night she was sniffly.

These are all, of course, assuming he doesn't have a fever or ear infection...those need the dr., pronto!

This morning, moxette was FUNNY...she was totally out sleeping, but talking LOUDLY to herself in her sleep. That cracks my shit up. Just like her daddy. hehe.
farmgirl
tart, Not to sound like an ad, but I'm a big fan of California Baby Cold & Flu bath: http://californiababy.com/colds-flu-aromat...bath-13-oz.html

It really seems to help clear up the conjestion. I've tried the drops in the bath, too, but they sort of floated on top of the water rather than dispersing like the bubble bath.

Speaking of books, has anyone run into any good childrens books about the "birds and the bees?" Tot2 is full of questions lately, and I tend to go with a "just the facts" approach, and it's fine so far, but I'm still feeling like I need some additional help. She's also been coming home from school with a lot of misinformation that needs to be cleared up. A lot of it cracks me up (like when she accuses the Mr. and I of "Sexing" when we kiss...), but a lot of it just makes me shake my head. It's amazing what kids will make up in the absence of real information. Which, of course, is why I want to make sure we have open communication about all topics! Anyway, I'd appreciate any suggestions!
tart
No apology needed, Farmgirl - that's a great site! Thanks for the tip! Do you order online, or can I find it retail somewhere, Whole Foods, maybe?

On the sexuality tip, how old is Tot2? I remember a friend raving about this book at one point, but it might be rehashing what you've already covered. Good on you for wanting to get things out in the open - my early sex ed came from living on a farm & discovering my dad's soft porn stash... blink.gif
farmgirl
tart, Thanks for the book recommendation! That's exactly the sort of thing I'm looking for. And, they had other recommendations on that page I'm going to look into. Tot2 is 6. She's gotten some of her sex ed. from our having chickens and other pets, but, yeah, I'd rather we talk about the human stuff before she discovers any porn! **laugh** Thanks again!

I used to have to order CA Baby online (when I actually lived in California, oddly enough...), but the hippy town I now live in has it at the supermarket. Whole Foods would be a good place to try.
chani
How Did I Begin? by Michael Mannion
This one is soooo funny! "Then mommy and daddy had a special hug and he put his penis in her vagina"
Amazon listed copies at $70 which must be a typo cause it's a little paperback kids book. Try your independent booksellor.
moxiegirl
lassies!

I am very glad I don't have to worry about that for a good 2-3 years! I figure, if we have another one, moxette will probably ask questions, and we can just cross that bridge when we come to it. smile.gif

A sleepytime question- moxette has been great about sleeping through the night (with 1 midnight dream feed) since she was about 8 weeks old. Now, at 4 months (this week=17), she's been waking up, screaming, at 3-4 AM. Gah. I end up feeding her a "little" (1-2oz) bit to comfort her, because walking, cuddles, etc. haven't worked. I really, seriously, don't want this to become habit. Is the waking (and not being able to self-sooth back to sleep) normal at this age? Maybe we aren't feeding her enough, and she really is hungry? Help!
tart
Welcome to the 4-month sleep shake-up, Mox! By all reports, it's perfectly normal & to be expected. According to my mama friends, it usually lasts only for a week or two, so I don't know that I'd stress about making a habit of the wee hour feeds. She's still growing fast, & the extra calories will likely come in handy to help her sort out her sleep again. At least she goes back to sleep - a friend of mine & her 5-month-old are up for the day at 4am these days... (ps - saline drops are doing the trick, thanks, with a little Baby Vicks rub at night)

The whole self-soothing thing I don't think comes reliably til a bit later, like 5-6 months. Tartlet will ride out little wakeups (a cough, a loud car, miscellaneous dream flailing), but a wet diaper or the a/c on too high (whoops!) & he's up yelling. I always nurse him down - he's still scrawny & it works like a charm, beating out an hour of walking/rocking/bouncing... He's actually been really good these past weeks, only waking around midnight to eat, and then I go & get him at 5 to start the morning routine. Sometimes he jumps the gun a bit, like this morning, and yells at 4:30, so I just bring him into bed with us for a nurse & cuddle.

I'm feeling much the uber-mama this morning - I pump at work, and got 4 oz my first sitting. Normally it takes me 2 rounds to get that much! Moooooo! /inadvertantly breastfeeding-heavy post
moxiegirl
MOO!!! ROck on with the pumping, tart!

She usually does great with self soothing...chats a little to herself, then our like a light. I do suspect its the typical 4-month "touchpoint" (i heart dr. brazelton!), and i just need to cuddle/feed her to get through it. We'll check it out with the Dr. tomorrow, though. More shots- yuck! I gotta say I agree with you on a quick feed being better than an hour's cuddles...i know its not "textbook", but it works. If worse comes to worse, there's always baby tylenol, right? No? Can't drug her? Oh.
tart
Phooey - my "textbook" (aka Dr Sears & my ped) says feed 'em if you got 'em!

My mother now cops to putting a few drops of brandy in my bottle when I was wee - I had colic & screamed for 3 months solid, and I can't say now that I really blame her. I turned out ok, right? wacko.gif
moxiegirl
ah, you're attachment style...we've got dr. brazelton and baby 411-- both of whom reccomend "cuddles, not feeding" unless they really need it at night. Eh, i figure the farmgirl theory "whatever gets the most sleep for the most family members" is what will happen.
tart
Yeah, it's funny, when we were first discussing our pending parenthood, I was very leery of AP - the couple downstairs are hardcore, & I can see some developmental issues in their very charming, but very attached 6-year-old daughter. Once Tartlet was born, though, most of our our cry-it-out/self-actualized child theories went out the window, at least for the moment - he was just too scrawny to leave to his own devices re: eating, & it was clear he was happiest being cuddled & carried. I figure, he's only this tiny once, and we're not whole hog on the AP - he has a separate room with a crib, he's in his stroller more often than not for outside adventures, I'm happily supplementing with formula... I'm all for what works, so I'll check out your books for ideas, too.

I think we need a new book - BustieBabies: Raising Your Baby Right While Still Being a Righteous Babe...
moxiegirl
Tart- i would really, seriously reccomend Dr. Brazelton's "Touchpoints: 0-3" He has a very, very common-sense approach, especially concerning developmental milestones and challenges. Not much "feed X amount at Y time" kind of advice, but more developmental stuff. The "touchpoint" we're at, 4 mos., is marked by tremendous cognative development (second only to 1 year old/walking), so sleeping through the night becomes a bit more challenging...they just are UP when they wake.

I DIG your title...let's see, what can we add to the Chapter Titles:

1. HBI's after 9PM...Sex after Baby
-Step 1: bedtime is sacred
-Step 2: Monitors Work
-Step 3: HBIs are damed exciting when working against the clock!

What else??
farmgirl
I tend to be leery of anyone who's hardcore anything, and I'm not a fan of the labels. If I had to choose one, though, I guess we'd be AP-lite. I breastfed, but only until **I** was done--they didn't lead. We had them all in the bed with us for about a minute--until I realized that was breaking my "most sleep/most people" rule, etc...

I think a BustieBabies book would rock!

So, I went to the bookstore yesterday looking for tart's and chani's recommendations (LOVE the cover illustration on that one, chani!), and ended up with two books by the same author/illustrator team, Harris and Emberley. It's So Amazing! (for tots 1 & 2) and It's NOT the Stork! (for tot3). I'm digging them because they present the facts in an age-appropriate, but not condescending, way. Also, the illustrations include a lot of different family configurations (including mixed-race, single, and same-gender parents), and each has a chapter on families that includes info on surrogacy and adoption. My only issue so far is that they don't address trans-gender (the definitive "all girls grow up to be women" bothered me a bit...), but they're pretty inclusive/compresensive otherwise.

/farmgirl book review tongue.gif

ETA: whoops, left this up too long and didn't see moxie's post. Chapter 1 is cracking me up!
bebesho2
I so wish I could remember the name of a book I got for my daughter from the library. it covered EVERYTHING. Imean all the types of parents/ couples. homosexuality. Sex. Pregnancy-you name it. AWESOME! Will check later.

We stay open about sex with the kids. But it is so not fun when she began referrring to it as "that thing you and Dad do" Ick.

Ahh the AP title. I fit tha ttitle but never heard of it til way after I had the 2nd kid. I basically parent by instinct and well, investigation. Life is one big experience/experiment....lol I can let alot slide, I never preach irl (I have gotten wordy online before!) I do not know most of the answers and I have 2 polar opposite children-so proving what works for one does not always work for the next!



farmgirl
"so proving what works for one does not always work for the next!"

Story. Of. My. Life.

Could the book be It's Perfectly Natural? That's the next one in the series I got--for the pre-teen set.
moxiegirl
SO, anyone have good remedies for teething? I think moxette has started getting fussy b/c of that. The Dr. said we can tylenol her all night...which is great, cause then she sleeps, but what about the rest of the time? She doesn't seem to enjoy the teether toy...
farmgirl
Frozen carrots were a popular teething "toy" around here. By the time tot2 came around, I got wise & got one of those mesh bag dealies to put them in. Also, rags dampened with some watered-down apple juice and then frozen.
tart
Oh, let the good times roll, eh Mox?... We've been doing some research, anticipating the inevitable, and Hylands tablets seem to be the universal curative for teething woes. Our doc recommended those, Tylenol at night, and anything rough & chewy to relieve the itching gums. I don't know if it would work with formula, but a friend's mom suggested I freeze a few tablespoons of breastmilk & give it to Tartlet in a little mesh/terrycloth bag - a "momsicle", if you will. Sounds messy, but I bet it would feel nice...

Tartman's folks were in town this weekend, and he dropped Tartlet off at daycare while he ran them back to the airport. Tartlet ate just before being dropped off, and I picked him up about an hour or so later. The daycare ladies saw him sucking on his thumb & fists, thought he was hungry, & gave him another 4 oz of formula from our emergency stash. Being Mr Piggypants, he wolfs it down, only to spit it right back up as I'm walking him home. Grrr. I hate to be That Mother, but I think it's time to spell out a few specifics to the DCLs. They complain that he spits up a lot, but don't see the relationship between spitting up & overfeeding. Bah.

Hope things calm down for you & the Moxette... and the more I think about the BustieBabies book, the more I like it. We have to promise it won't just be flippant grrrl schtick, though - I'm thinking solid, useful advice, stories from the trenches, pros/cons of breastfeeding/babywearing/CIO/whatehaveyou, a section on the varying degrees of PPD & how to keep your self while still being a good mama... (apparently, I tested fairly high for PPD about 10 weeks out - not enough to need intervention, but enough for my GP to touch base. I though I was just tired...)

Brain. Whirling. Must consult publishing friend...
moxiegirl
So, things seem to be back on the upswing at moxieland. Moxette's getting back on her sleep routine, somewhat reluctantly, but she's doing it! We've been given the "OK" for tylenol as many nights as needed, so that's what we're going with. I'm gonna keep that momsicle idea handy, though.

I had just the BEST laugh ever from my kid last night...she pants then squeals! I LOVE it. She made me laugh so hard i was crying. Awesome.

Tart- yeah, i'd have a serious chat with the daycare folks. Babies eat fists. Hungry or not. At 4 mos old, his hand is his favorite toy, no? Moxette goes between her hand, and my hand. hehe.

I also mentioned the "book" over in the CBC thread...i think having CBC women's input would be really invaluable. Tart, have you figured out how to keep your SELF while still being the mama you envisioned yourself being (which, btw, is not necessairly the "best" mama we can be, no?)? Let me know if you do!
tart
Oh for fuck's sake.
moxiegirl
oh, i know, i know. Hella...its a PARENTING magazine. Whatever, the fact that people make that big a deal over an article and photograph discussing breastfeeding just makes me shake my head. Um, I thought we were all supposed to SUPPORT food-boobs wherever, whenever, right? Now, I want on parenting magazine with my big tub-o-forumla. (snicker, snicker...)
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