Feb 16 2007, 07:06 PM
I know Ap but something isn't registering with my brain.
The heart and brain thing.If they EVER come up will a pill for heart vs brain I'll be the first in line (providing it hasn't been tested on animals.LOl)
So today Frenchcrush messages me on myspace telling me that he's been up since 5am trying to work out how to record my voice and piano at the same time.I'm a singer/songwriter ecte ect .And he has this basic studio with an electric piano and a computer.We go in the studio sometimes and play to each other.
5am?? Now I'm really confused.He doesnt write songs or sing...but I do.We tried to record the other night but couldn't get it to work properly.Now he's put in all the time and effort and wants me to go over there on Tuesday.I said I would because I suck...Yeah I know......
Feb 17 2007, 10:36 AM
You just have to keep things in perspective. I know it's hard, but you know deep down that Frenchcrush isn't the guy for you. Have fun with it while it lasts, but know that it will end with you unfulfilled relationship wise. You'll have had some fun, gained some more experience, tried new things, but that's that. Don't set yourself up for heartbreak.
It's cool that he wants to record you, though. I say take advantage of that for what it's worth. Something really creative & interesting may come of it.
Feb 17 2007, 04:32 PM
So there are new developments with Dcrush. He emailed me on Valentines day saying that he wanted to ask me out, but he got the flu and would have to stay isolated (a very believable excuse, cuz its already hit a couple other people I know)...anyway, he told me that he had bought me a bottle of Fernet, cuz I've been bitching about how none of the bars here stock it. EEEEEEE! Hes so sweet. Winning my heart with booze. *le sigh*
Yesterday however, I asked if he was better and if he wanted to hang out. He said he was feeling better but was going down to San Diego with a buddy to go surfing all weekend
So last night I went out with the girl that had originally introduced me to him, and after waaaaay too many drinks, I finally told her what was going on and asked for his back story. WELL. Turns out he was with a girl for two years, and they broke up in November because she cheated on him. Apparently, she deeply regrets it and is actively trying to get him back. I guess hes torn because he really loved her but cant get over how bad she hurt him.
So now I'm thinking 'crap'. Even if he doesnt get back together with her, its still pretty fresh. I dont want to be a rebound, but I really like him and want to date him. What should I do?
Feb 17 2007, 07:12 PM
imdancingbarefoot~lots a lot of portions. congrats on crush du jour!
zoya~yeah, you're smitten.
ophelia~so cool about your lastest fella!
datagirl~um, yeah, i would slowly back away from frenchman. i never had a good feeling about him. seriously. too much of the player. don't read too much into the staying up until 5am stuff. he's not the guy for you. don't settle. you have too much to offer.
greenbean~i don't think there is anything you need to do. just enjoy it. keep spreading yourself around. don't put all of your eggs in one basket, you know. be cool. i don't think there's anything to worry about yet.
Feb 18 2007, 08:28 AM
So I saw the former crush du jour at the bar on Friday, and I don't even want to talk to him again, like I don't even want to be friends with him. Not only is he a moron while drinking, he's also a horrible dancer, and kind of mean when he's drunk.
I don't have a crush at the moment. Hmmm
As for the rest of y'all, I hope that it all goes well.
Feb 18 2007, 01:30 PM
Damn I missed sending you all hugs n kisses on Valentines, but I had other priorities.....one of which included bing told by the 'one that had me smitten' that she needs to spend more time on her own
that she really values being by herself....that hurts, but it's my own fault I suppose.....she was in a 4-year rel that ended about a month before we started dating. The thing that irritates me tho is that all through the last few months, I have been getting this "you are so good for me, you are so right, why could I not have met you sooner, you make me feel so alive in bed, waking up in your arms is the best thing ever (an "I love you" was thrown in there too, (drunk of course)" ...so why in the blink of an eye, am I being cast aside? And men are weird?
Anyway, I am going to have to get out and do some CRRRUSHING, admittedly I am not keen on it right now, I feel a little tender about the whole thing, and have to deal with the heartbreak crap first. But I will more than likely become another sucker for punishment
I am off to Germany tomorrow eve on business, should keep my mind off things for a bit....
Ultimately tho......I AM BAAACK!
Hey GB I saw you post this:
Even if he doesnt get back together with her, its still pretty fresh. I dont want to be a rebound, but I really like him and want to date him. What should I do?
careful u don't get caught in the trap like I did...but then, you are probably equipped to deal with the poo flung from the fan, better than I am.
Feb 19 2007, 01:01 PM
HI KALEVRA!!!!!! yay! it is so good to see you!! that sucks about your girl. my take on why you're being 'cast aside?' she's scared. I wouldn't call it rebound, I would say just scared of getting into something serious so soon. I would expect that she's going to be back and forth with it, from what you say she sounds like a nice girl and I think sometimes us nice girls get more confused about stuff like that. ie: we know a good thing and we really want to try, but we also want to take care of ourselves and it gets confusing. But it doesn't sound malicious to me. sucks, though. I'm sorry.
speaking of valentines day, I totally forgot to post that I got a valentine's e-card from shyguy. It was weird and oblique as usual. argh.
ok, that's all for now.
Feb 19 2007, 03:55 PM
I'm doing some recording with Frenchcrush tonight.I went around to my besties house last night and talked about this 'issue' with him.She seemed to think that he's just scared and suggested I not mention the 'where is this going'speech for a while.My mother (who reads tarot cards) did a reading for me about a month ago.And in the reading an old flame that he got very hurt from came up.I had never mentioned that he was still sort of reeling from this.
So much thinking and lack of sleep is making me crazy though and I'm just thinking of calling the whole thing off already.I still have no idea what's going on.I'm nervous and it's only just gone 9:10am.
Feb 19 2007, 04:37 PM
Data, woman, I ain't gonna touch this one with a twenty foot pole. Je concède la défaite.
Feb 19 2007, 05:26 PM
Ap,I wish I was outside looking in.Maybe because my day job is a little tedious or I haven't got alot going on at the mo.I know about car crashes,but a part of me just wants to see how I come out of it.No air bags
Feb 19 2007, 05:59 PM
well good luck datagirl. we'll take care of you, wounds and all. but, a man who is pretty direct about not wanting anything serious. means it. no hidden agenda there. nothing you can change. have fun.
kal!! bummer. definitely get yourself back out there crushin when you are up to it. definitely she needs time to herself. she needs to work out her issues. yeah, us ladies have issues sometimes too. but, make sure you come back around to let us know how you are doing!!
zoya, dude, i'm over shyguy. don't read into that e-card thing. sweet though.
Feb 19 2007, 06:18 PM
oh yeah, i'm not reading into the e-card... if you could have heard the sarcasm in my voice and seen the roll of the eyes when I said 'weird and oblique as usual' it would have seemed more that way. homeboy has known me for almost 4 months and he's had plenty of time to engage. whatever. I may ask him for a drink when I'm around in a couple of weeks, but more just to stay in touch and stuff. Not for any reason (he works in my business and is definitely a good contact, so no harm no foul for just being friendly and staying in touch to a certain extent)
Feb 19 2007, 06:23 PM
Data, you don't need to be on the outside to see what's going on, you need to quantify the info you already have instead of blatantly ignoring it. I'm not Carnak, I'm going off your own posts, here. This guy has been upfront with you all along about being a commitment phobe. His 'ships are short except for the one with the *married* woman (You know that left him three years of just fucking random chicks while having that "relationship.".) His house is full of toys. He's paranoid about marriage/kids. Etc, etc, etc. How much clearer could the guy be? Red flag, after red flag that you seem to want to ignore. You're grasping at too many straws to enumerate. Your BFF says he scared. You knew this already & it's not likely gonna change. Tarot? Again, I'm, not gonna touch it. You can wishful think & stuff until Hell freezes over. You KNOW what is gonna happen if you continue in this mindset. You're gonna get your heart broken for no good reason. If you feel like you need the car wreck, have at. Just don't be surprised when you're surrounded by flaming wreckage. We'll be here with the fire extinguishers.
Feb 19 2007, 08:01 PM
Wud up, Kal!
Sorry about your crushie, and yes, I am going to be very cautious about not gettin caught in the same trap. Actually, Dcrush seems to be cautious enough for the both of us. Besides the one-time make-out and the continuous communication, and the v-day present, he is still pretty vague about how he feels about me. I'm having a hard time with it today, because I'm pmsing and feeling all needy and wanting a cuddle-buddy.
Stargazer, I totally want to be spreading it around but I havent been in a flirtatous mood lately. Its quite annoying. I had my fun sluttin' it up all year and now I'm in that "waaaa, I want a boyfriend!" place. Grrr.
I hate when I feel needy. hate it. hate it.
Feb 20 2007, 08:47 AM
yesterday was supposed to be my first date with the indian guy from new zealand. instead, our first date was on friday, to play pool, and yesterday was our second date, to watch a movie. he's actually coming to a scotch tasting this week, that i am taking my dad to for his birthday.
Feb 20 2007, 04:32 PM
Feb 21 2007, 06:36 AM
Hey Gals...greetings from Germany...
I am on a buz trip over here, and although I enjoy Europe (history comes from there
) I forgot to bring warm clothes, being in the Middle East you tend to not worry about warm kit. I am freezing my ass off here..
Thanks for the info on the ex-chrushie, I know that we all need to resolve issues, but I suppose I am just bent outta shape because I have no issues to contend with, and yet someone else decides that I should be a placeholder while they gt sorted out. I have emotions to, and tend not to get too involve unless I feel sure about the other person.....I am left sitting with the busted up heart.....suppose that is the game huh, hence the title on this forum....
On the other hand, one of my colleagues from Ireland is here on the same seminar, and although I have spoken to her on the ph, we have never met, .....sheesh, I think I stood there in front of her for about 30 seeconds.....speechless and slack-jawed (with maybe a small amount of drool apparent)....stunning is not the word....nice crush, but long distance is a no-no form my experience, and then the old saying "Don't dip your pen in company ink"
So nice to have a crush,.....mmmm
Hey GB, I hear you on the 'needy' thing to, as a guy, I get like that too, I just wanna pamper someone, and get cuddled up....and you can't....to hell with circumstance....ugh
Feb 23 2007, 12:33 PM
oh my. issues. need some....i don't know. not advice per se, just feedback i guess. sorry for the long post. i don't think i am going to see this guy again.
date #3 was last night, he met my dad at the scotch tasting. he impressed my dad, which was nice, and was being sociable not clingy.
however, by the end of the evening, it came up that he had not eaten so was therefore feeling the alcohol more than he otherwise would have. i was too, but at least i had eaten some dinner. we had been talking in a group of about 5 people, and at the end of the night, i exchanged phone numbers with the other girl hanging out with us, which garnered me a strange look from him.
he could not remember at first where he had parked the car, and then when we were kissing, because he was unable to kiss me hello earlier, he pulled away and said, you're too much for me, and i said, what do you mean? and he said i was too voluptuous. i said, seriously, well if you don't like [my body] then we don't have to be dating. and then he tried to say no he really liked my body ..... sorta repeated that i was too much. (this started him pissing me off).
then he and i went to another party, which we had planned on doing, but i knew at that point he needed some food, but he did not want to get fast food.
we get to the next party, and he has some more wine, then switches to water. (have i mentioned yet that this is the 3rd time this week he's been drinking?) at the party, he and i and another [indian] friend are talking about marriage (all our siblings are married), and he says something, i'm not sure what since it was loud at the party, and my friend looked at me like, are you kidding? and i gave her a look back, like, i don't know, and he had no idea this subconversation was going on. and then he and i were talking (just ourselves) and he's asking me something, probably asking again why was i interested in him (i forget how he worded it), and then makes some comment like, i'm not going to sleep with you for like 4 months, and i said, i don't care - we talked about this the other day and agreed that we would not sleep together too quickly, so we can get to know each other without clouding the issue.
then he got some more water, and then we decided to go and get food, so i said goodbye to my friends, exchanging numbers with some people whose numbers i did not have yet, which garnered me another look from him.
then he needed food - he asked if i had food at my house, and i said yeah, but then he was looking for some place in the area that was 24hr, and we ended up going to BK because the drivethrough was still open (then saying, you should be cooking for me) then he took me to my car so we could go to my house (this entire process took about a half hour).
we get to my house, eat.....he's unabashedly looking at my stuff - including trying to open my kitchen cabinets to see what kind of spices i had for cooking.
somewhere in the middle of all this, we talked about how the words n*gger, f*g and retard were not cool - he says them on occasion, and i was like, don't say that - it's really offensive.
um. what else. when we got ready to go to sleep, he could/would not leave me alone - kept wanting to snuggle so he could touch my breasts, and he wanted me to go down on him,......i'm like, baby we both have to work in the morning and i'm tired so please leave me alone. i woke up around 2 hours later, thirsty, so got some water for us, and he was trying to have a conversation about how he 'met my standards' physically speaking, and i'm like, i want to sleep, we talked about this the other day - he was basically being insecure and fishing for compliments i guess......i had told him that he had to leave when the alarm went off in the morning so i could get ready for work, which i think annoyed him. he was also trying to ask how many people i had been with - which i had already told him was none of his business, which annoyed him i think.
i guess that's my story....please comment
Feb 23 2007, 01:51 PM
hmm.. he sounds like a dork. I mean, the boy sounds like he would be a real pain in the ass if you started dating him on a regular basis. so many mixed messages and things he's saying.
looking at it from the outside, I see a few red flags that you yourself have brought up:
"it's the 3rd time this week he's been drinking" - now, I myself will have a few drinks 2 or 3 times a week sometimes, but that's maybe a drink with dinner. it sounds to me like this is more, and it bothers you. listen to your inner voice on that. as someone who was in a relationship with an alcoholic for a few years, if early on in the game it bothers you, get out before you get deeper. Just sayin.
twice you say he gave you strange looks when you talked to other people and exchanged numbers - I don't have any idea what this means, but it seems weird and insecure and worst case, controlling if you end up dating him and he doesn't like it if you do that.
He tells you he won't sleep with you for like 4 months, then he comes over and wants you to go down on him.. that makes no sense to me. Sex is sex. sorry, but just because his junk isn't in your vajayjay (I can't stop using that word ever since I saw it in the "LTAS" thread!) doesn't mean it's not sex. Seems to me he's got weird views on sex (possibly cultural? not that that makes it right, to me that's just an excuse. hell, my ascestry is famous for being randy and brash when it comes to sex.. is that an excuse for me? ok, well, nevermind. that's not a good example
hahaha ) ANYWAY... it seems, like you said, he's insecure and putting it off on you, and sending mixed messages and all that crap.
what I'm trying to point out is something that I've been told before, mostly in the wake of break-ups, but in the context of "think of the red flags you saw early on and chose to ignore, and next time, try to notice if there are red flags and don't get in too far if there are" So I'm just trying to point out the red flags that you yourself have mentioned so that maybe you can see them more easily.
my two cents is listen to your gut about not seeing this guy again and get out before you even start giving a shit about him. he sounds like a mess.
well, hopefully that helped...
ps - guess who i got to meet yesterday?? .. .and it's not a boy, but she is so cute and nice i would probably have a crush on her if I batted for that team...
Feb 23 2007, 01:54 PM
hi girls, i wanted to do a drive by shout-out since i havent been around in FOREVER.
i have a few boys of my own, one of which i am actually meeting this sunday site unseen, but we talk alot. random, yes i know. ill give a full update later.
Feb 24 2007, 03:52 PM
Awww, Zoya! Any chance the person you met likes refried beans
Hey Katiebelle, can't wait to hear the deets!
P_176, it doesn't even sound like you have a crush on this guy anymore. I agree with zoya, lots of red flags.
So heres my update (snuggles up to Kal in needy puppy fashion):
Still crazy for DCrush, but things are going at a snails pace. I'm trying to play it cool and just be a buddy. Well, last night went on a mass bike ride, and he and some of his boys came to my place after for some beers. Dcrush was getting pretty cozy with me, and even put his arm around me in front of everyone, which made me feel like it was junior high again (in a good way!). In almost a replay of the last time, the other guys got the hint and took off, and I asked Dcrush to stay.
He did, we made-out, but again he didnt try to go any further. He didnt even try and slip a hand up my shirt,..whats up with this boy!?? I could tell he was hard, so its not like things arent happening down there...hes just really not into progressing things. If hes the type of guy that only has sex when he feels like he can really trust his partner (thats what he seems like) then thats totally fine and I can wait..I just wish he could give me more verbal validation that he likes me,..so far there have only been gestures.
Anyway, we fell asleep in each others arms but in the morning I woke to find him sleeping on his back with his arms crossed--literally wrapped around his chest. Talk about symbolism. This boy is not ready to let me in there. Stupid ex-girlfriend sure did a number on him. bah.
Feb 24 2007, 09:59 PM
Katiebelle!! Good to see you again!! Check in when you get more time!!
(((Kal))) Dude, hang in there. Sorry your heart was crushed by this lass. You better keep comin' back to this thread. Crush or no crush, you hear!!
zoya, gurl your hormones must be off the hook. boys. girls. there is no stopping you!
p_176~ditto what everyone else said. red flags galore. you deserve a man who will praise and adore you for who you are and your body without criticizing you. yeah, i don't like this boy.
greenbean~dude, i think you should just work on the getting to know this guy stuff. don't rush for sex as a way to get validation that he likes you. it doesn't take much for a guy to get hard and get off. i think you should take it as a compliment that he wants to get to know YOU. yes, awesome you. remember, executive cock. make him work. don't settle for less. he likes you dude. relax. breathe. stop overanalyzing.
Feb 24 2007, 10:29 PM
stargazer... hahahahaha.. well no, it's not like that, but we did talk about our crushes and frustrations....
Kal... don't go away, we love you
BTW, shyguy.. dropped off face of earth for good, I think. I think I'm gonna drop him a line when I am in his neck of the woods next, see if he wants to get a drink or food, but that's about it. whatever with him. (and I'm not dropping him a line to try and make anything happen, I just think it would be good to extend the invitation, since we are in the same field and keeping him as a contact would be good)
SB - hmm. I have seen him online, and I've initiated contact via IM both times. Both times he's been receptive and our conversation went on for quite awhile the second time. he's not overly flirty but he shoots out signs that he is into me (uh, like when I accidentally wrote kind of a double entendre sentence and he asked if that meant I was sending dirty pictures, and when I said "only if you get a webcam" he responded "I'm getting a whole new computer with giant webcam tomorrow" (he was just kidding, btw) but he hasn't initiated contact nor emailed me. I'm not certain what to make of it, because everything seemed ok. Actually, what my gut is saying is that 1) he's shy but mostly 2) we both have hectic schedules and the schedules we have right now keep us apart most of the next 3-4 months at least. I think that perhaps the balloon has deflated a little, so to speak. That perhaps if I was there, it would be different, but I'm not. Not to mention the living on two continents thing, and add to the fact that our schedules keep us in totally different places for awhile. But for me, I have such a hectic schedule / lifestyle, that it doesn't matter to me one iota. I'm used to it. If you want to make something work, you do. That's how I see things. But I just kinda think that maybe on his end, it's not bad, he likes me, is attracted to me, but the whole parameters are just kinda big for him. Just my sense. Not an excuse, more of an observation. Although I also think that there's that whole thing if a guy is into you he'll find a way to keep in touch with you or see you. BUT I'M GOING TO KEEP PLUGGING AWAY. this one walked right into my life. I'm keeping him. There is every reason for it to work out, and well, I'm not stopping. (any guy thoughts, mr wise kalevra??)
p_176 - give us the update. are you doing ok?
Feb 25 2007, 06:42 PM
hey ladies (and kal;-) - am doing fine - have talked to him on the phone but no serious conversation.....still unsure of how to pursue this conversation, because i'mnot sure how much i care to find out. am still deciding my motivation to be in a relationship. and since my dad liked him, i have to play it cool with the 'rents (don't want them to know i met yet another ass)
Feb 26 2007, 07:40 AM
ahem. SB just called me. mmmmmmmmm. very nice.
Feb 26 2007, 10:15 AM
So I met someone this weekend, and I am totally smitten. He's 32, own his own business, and house. He walked me to my car the night we met, gave me a good night kiss (daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn) and didn't try anything else. He was such a gentleman! he called me that night, and I talked to him last night. We are getting together tomorrow, I hope, tentative plans. Here's is hoping. I'll let you know!
Feb 27 2007, 10:50 PM
I miss AP in this thread.
that is all.
Feb 28 2007, 10:27 AM
the older guy called (have i told you guys about him? it's this guy who is twice my age that i've been dating off and on for about 6 years.), we'll do lunch or something for his birthday and valentines day.
the VA guy - still emailing with him, have not made plans. i'm beginning to think he's the best option i have right now, even though he's uber shy, but he lives in VA and i'm here, and neither of us is moving anywhere. so longterm it might not work
the guy in Millersville, who owns his own house, and is really boring, still calls, but won't open up to me - even after knowing him for a few months, i know mostly about his work and sports but not *him*....makes me think he has major issues (other than just being boring)
the indian guy from new zealand who thinks i'm too voluptuous - is out of town this weekend, so we might do something next week but i am not sure....pretty neutral right now
a friend of mine who i have not talked to in a year (for no particular reason, just lost contact), he and i are going to hang out on thursday....there's still some flirtation going on but last time i talked to him he did not want something serious.....
Feb 28 2007, 06:35 PM
I find the comment he made about not liking your voluptuous figure troublesome. Honestly, if your parents like him, cool, but they are not the one's actually involved with him.
Mar 1 2007, 01:26 PM
hey p_176 =) I skimmed the thread and read your story. Whoa. Didn't like what the indian guy had to say. Red flags all over the place for me. Just sayin'.
I introduced Orion, after careful thought, to the Lounge.
Mar 2 2007, 02:31 AM
Didn't have time the last time:
Many kisses all around!
Katiebelle! Good to see you!
Zoya, you seem to know what you want. Keep at it! Even if you're having a little snack here and there.
Culturehandy, yay! I'm happy for you, since last I heard you didn't want to talk to the last guy.
Greenbean, stargazer's right, even though I do EXACTLY the same thing. I get all headtrippy about it too. Does he not like me? What? You know. Anyway. He likes you enough to hang out with his friends. This is neat.
woo! go Data! I have to say, I agree in principle with the others, but if you go in knowing all to be had is a set thing, then it's perfectly cool. I hope things work to your advantage milady.
AP! How are you?
Mar 2 2007, 09:01 AM
The last guy I talked about, we will call him S. yah, he turned out to be a prat. Not impressed,
Then there was B, and well I didn't really like him,
So here I am with D. We've moved beyond crushie stage and not dating, I suppose you could say that we're seeing each other... I went into details in the okay...thread in media whores.
zoya, anything new?
p_176, updates on Indian guy???? Kind of wondering what is going on there.
Mar 4 2007, 10:40 AM
am dumping indian guy. he's neurotic. saw him over the weekend, and he was embarrassed that he said i was too curvy....but then had issues with other things (namely, that i won't tell him an exact number of guys i have slept with, 'cause it's none of his business), so whatever. he also still maintains that he does not want to have sex with me, yet expects me to spend the night and do everything but have actual intercourse.
Mar 4 2007, 03:04 PM
Huzzah! DTMA! Why do guys still ask that question? Don't they know we're gonna either refuse to answer or outright lie?! And the whole "we can do it all but penetrative sex" is just pointless. If you're in for a penny fella, you're in for a pound. Is he afraid you're a devil woman that will get pregnant & ensnare him for life?
Mar 4 2007, 03:24 PM
..I am going to see SB next week!!
that is all.
Mar 4 2007, 07:50 PM
AP - i think he realizes he can't handle me;-)
Mar 4 2007, 08:13 PM
HI ZOYA! Rock that Scots ass all the way to Hadrian's Wall!
Good. At least he knows he isn't good enough for you. You have a sexy, curvy body, a sharp mind & he can't handle that. Fuck 'im. It's not your fault he's too weak to handle your power. No point wasting time on wussies.
Mar 4 2007, 10:39 PM
Zoya, what?? the rest of us are not good enough to know about SB??
p_176, i'm so glad you are dumping indian guy. terrible. he probably knew he couldn't hit it.
what a lame guy.
culturehandy, this boy sounds interesting. now, i've got to read about him in the okayers thread.
nothing new in my department. been on the down low since the passing of my friend/roomie. but, all of this sadness has been making me wish i had a boy to hold me and give me lots of hugs. oh well.
Mar 5 2007, 01:16 AM
that wasn't supposed to be "Hi AP, guess what I'm going to see SB next week.."
it was supposed to be HI AP!! (since she hasn't been around lately...)
and then the SB was supposed to be for everyone. what? you can't tell by the space I left in between the lines on that post??!!!
Mar 5 2007, 11:01 AM
p_176 I'm glad you ditched that wanker.
(((star))) if you were here I'd give you a big long hug, and just listen and be there for you. I know what you mean about having someone around.
Zoya, I wish I could read between the lines.
Mar 5 2007, 01:34 PM
I miss having crushes. I'm trolling around Nerve and OKcupid because I want to develop new crushes. Nobody in my life is turning me on, and I want to get excited about somebody again. Nobody has made me excited in years, and I've given guys chances to get to know them and they ended up as friends rather than interesting me further.
Mar 5 2007, 01:39 PM
Yeah Zoya! I'm so happy you two worked around your schedules to meet up! Can't wait to hear the deets!
Congrats Culturehandy on the new beau!
Ophelia, is Orion your dude? How are things going there?
You are right about my overthinking Dcrush, and I'm trying real hard not to. I went away on business last week and just got back...and he hasn't called or emailed or anything!! I wish I didn't care. I keep telling myself that if he actually was pursuing me more blatantly and aggressively, then perhaps I'd be running for the hills! But whenever I meet a guy and think, "oh, this one is gonna be *crazy* about me"..and then he isn't so much,..I get totally obsessed and irrational. I keep getting that Morrissey song in my head "The more you ignore me..." *sigh* Damn crushes. Damn 'em all to hell.
ETA: ((stargazer)) I don't know what happened but I hope you are ok!!
Mar 5 2007, 01:45 PM
(((anna)))) don't feel like that! I felt the same way for a while. It's hard not to become jaded after a while.
(((greenbean)))) thanks! I hope that all goes well with you.
Mar 5 2007, 01:50 PM
an old friend emailed me today! have not talked to this boy in about a year.
Mar 5 2007, 01:59 PM
p_176 do tell! Don't say something then leave us hanging!
Mar 5 2007, 04:04 PM
zoya, i guess you're forgiven.
greenbean, NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Don't be turning emo on me by referring to Morrissey songs!!! But, I know what you mean about becoming all obsessive and irrational when you develop a crush and unsure how some dude feels towards you. The story of my life.
what happened to kal?? why he gotta drop bombs on us and leave??
culture, i think you got a little explaining about your dude. how did you meet, etc?? spill the beans!!
p_176, same to you missy! who is this old friend??
i still find myself thinking about Bcrush and Mcrush. eh. But, i think it is to keep my mind busy. boys. don't understand 'em.
Mar 5 2007, 04:56 PM
Just to let ya'll know that Frenchcrush and I are still seeing each other.
I'm trying not to fall in love......really trying.
Mar 6 2007, 07:50 AM
Sooo crushed out. An impossibly boyish-cute lit student who plays guitar and is smart and funny.... and just so fucking cute.
Mar 6 2007, 09:22 AM
I met the former crushie (now man) through a friend, we started chatting at the bar, got his number. He called me that night, we talked for a while. Then he kept on calling. I was smitten. We got together, and we were "seeing" each other. Had a conversation recently about trying a relationship thing. I told him that I was cautious, scared, etc. Given I have been with someone who was highly controlling for 6 years. He told me that he was married, had the marriage annulled, because she cheated on him.
Let me see what can I tell you about the man. He's Italian, 32, owns his own business, has two degrees, intelligent, attractive. I'm scared! He treats me like a queen and has so much respect for me. It's weird. It's sad to say this, but I'm not used to this in a relationship. This whole mutual respect thing.
I'm falling hard. He wanted me to stay with him on Saturday, but I told him no, if I did, I would fall harder than I already am. Now I fear I will hold back (these fucking reassurance issues are back! fuck fuck fuck). I put it all in the open about how things are with me, and what I experience, how he HAS to be patient with me. I also told him one sign on jealousy and I will walk, because, and I quote, "I don't need that kind of bullshit again". He's not the jealous type, and I am still expecting it. I can't punish him for previous relationships, but I fear that I already am.
Datagirl, yay for French crushie!
edie do tell about the crushie!
Mar 6 2007, 02:22 PM
this guy i used to work with in college - we used to hang around, have some sex, go out to dinner - emailed me yesterday. the last time i saw him was about a year ago ('cause that's when my ex was moving out), and we exchanged numbers but i never called 'cause i am a dork. also, i was not wanting just a booty call at that point (just out of a breakup), then i did not know if he was still living there so i never called.
so i get this email yesterday, and we are talking over email - going to dinner next week (since he's out of town this weekend and i am in NY beginning of next week). so we'll see. maybe now he's no longer the eternal bachelor?