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lightchested
QUOTE(honeybunch @ Mar 17 2009, 11:25 AM) *
Okay, I'm trying to wrap my head around this still. I've brought this up before- my one co-worker, one who already has a boob job. She now wants lipo and a nose job.


Honeybunch...

Google BDD (body dysmorphic disorder) and maybe bring it up to your coworker. It could save her a lot of $ and grief to understand why she might be doing this.
loonydaray
edie; that sounds amazing! I would love to do something like that personally (nonsexual nude art)..It's like a way of saying I accept my body without selling it. I hate how when you type 'small breasts' in google you either come up with porn or 'make your breasts look bigger/better'...


Blah. Down day with the tatas. A while back someone posted a link to a blog talking about how skinny women are more frequently made fun of as opposed to curvy women. Now, I wouldn't go so far as to say skinny women have it worse, but I definitely think that it's more acceptable to make fun of a skinny chick. There are movies, books, groups, etc. TONS of support for curvy women. I have never once intentionally made someone feel bad because of their weight. and yet for some reason it's perfectly fine to call naturally skinny girls anorexic, or call them skinny bitch or whatever. I hate how people have to focus on the features that aren't "good." I am constantly pointing out all of the lovely features in my friends, I try my hardest to make them feel good about themselves because I think they are beautiful and so should they. But some of them.. man. Especially my best friend, who I've talked about before. I make light of the fact that I have little breasts when I'm around other chicks, sure. But I expect to either receive playful fun or telling me no way I'm perfect (what I would do for any friend, any woman, period.). But she just takes it to a hurtful level, unintentionally. Today was just awful. Generally it's playful. But today. erg. I can take one comment of 'you have no boobs!' when it's made in jest. But she literally tries to tell me that I have absolutely no breast tissue. But I can assure you while the bump is extremely slight it does exist and it is most definitely a breast. She sat there continually telling me that even my boyfriend has bigger boobs than I do with his pecs. I mean you know what, yeah probably they are. But that's ignoring the fact that he's HUUUUUUGGEEE compared to me in every single possible way! He's a foot taller than me and his ribcage is about three times the size of mine. I'm freaking tiny, so PROPORTIONALLY speaking my boobs would be bigger. But noo. And then even when I mention my butt, and that at least I have that, she just ridicules me and tells me no. Because she's lesbian and she prefers chubby women (which is fine), and that there's no way that my tiny butt (proportionally big on my body) is remotely noticeable. She always tells me that I would be completely unattractive to lesbians in general because I'm skinny (naturally so though). I'm not lesbian so it's not like I'm looking to attract them, but it's still kind of hurtful that I'm automatically not their type because of my body.

Your best friend is supposed to be the person you turn to and they can make you feel beautiful for you. But when I'm with her I feel like all of my insecurities and "faults" are highlighted and put on display. I just don't get it because I've never once done that to her.

anyway. rant ended. sad.gif
strongirl
looneydaray, you should tell your "best friend" how you feel, just like you did below. She needs to know the effect she is having and I bet she doesn't. It sounds to me like her own insecurities (about being larger, being lesbian - neither of which are exactly embraced in our culture) make her feel better when she puts you down for the opposite qualities. Tell her - for your benefit and hers.

I've been traveling and just got "caught up" here - wowee!!! Some amazing stuff got posted in here. Lightchested's stripper posts and the replies blew me away. Amazing insights. While I do come from more of a pro-porn perspective than some of you, I could not agree more with some of the analysis of the sexism and double standard. And just shining the light on the stuff that never gets talked about is huge.

I agree, Lightchested, you should write a book. There is a similar one out there - "Candy Girl" by Diablo Cody, the same woman who wrote the script for the movie "Juno". It was interesting and funny, but no where near as insightful as your posts, Lightchested. Your posts hit what I kept wanting that book to do but it never quite made it.
karategrrl
looneydaray, maybe I'm not the first person to say this, but if I were you I would seriously reconsider this woman as your friend. I agree with strongirl that she has some serious insecurities that overshadow any consideration she has for you--the typical "put others down to build me up" thing. Not cool at all. And another thing--lesbians are as diverse in their preferences as men or anyone else. I think I have a similar body type as yours, and I used to see a good amount of interest in it when I was hitting the lesbian clubs. If anything, I found that women appreciated my body--and especially my breasts--more than any man, so IMHO, she's full of it.

lightchested, I used to freelance as a small book publisher, designing and editing self-published paperbook books (like what iUniverse does). If you are seriously interested in publishing, I would be happy to offer advice if you want. I agree that it would make a great book. The VERY interesting slant on your story that sets it apart from others is your motive for getting into the industry--to want to "blow it apart." Your background in women's studies (I believe you said that) and your insights from a feminist point of view is what would really set the story on its ear. I could see your book as required reading in upcoming women's study courses. wink.gif Just to plant that seed.
angie_21
I agree with karategirl, loonydaray - your friend is full of it. First of all what she is saying is completely untrue, and she probably knows it. Why would she, as a lesbian, make stereotypes about lesbians? It's also sad that she would put down any women like that, never mind her "best friend." I don't know why she would even have a reason to say things like that, but it is not just insensitivity - it is clearly mean-spirited. I would find some better friends who appreciate your great boot-ay smile.gif

I am also trying to catch up with all the posts! I know exactly where you are all coming from, getting annoyed at being out-boobed. I used to actually get mad at the beach, like it was somehow their fault that these 13 year olds had big boobs and were flaunting it in my face. But now I try to appreciate everyone as people (after all, if we are judging so many people on their boobs, then we are just as shallow as the teenage boys who made us feel bad in the first place!) and recognize that we all have beauty, and we all have faults, and in the end it's unimportant. I also look back now and realize how much I got hit on at the beach, but didn't even know it because I refused to believe guys were even looking at my boobless body. If only I had known at the time!

And Starship - I have done a lot of fairly intense upper body work over the last 3 years, and I have found that although my cup size is the same, my proportions are much more balanced and my boobs appear bigger. It really does work, but it takes a while for girls to build up that kind of "bulk." And I don't look at all muscle-y. the key is to build muscle without loosing any fat, because it is only when you loose too much fat that your muscles become defined and start to look manly.
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Mar 19 2009, 11:25 AM) *
I am also trying to catch up with all the posts! I know exactly where you are all coming from, getting annoyed at being out-boobed. I used to actually get mad at the beach, like it was somehow their fault that these 13 year olds had big boobs and were flaunting it in my face. But now I try to appreciate everyone as people (after all, if we are judging so many people on their boobs, then we are just as shallow as the teenage boys who made us feel bad in the first place!) and recognize that we all have beauty, and we all have faults, and in the end it's unimportant. I also look back now and realize how much I got hit on at the beach, but didn't even know it because I refused to believe guys were even looking at my boobless body. If only I had known at the time!

And Starship - I have done a lot of fairly intense upper body work over the last 3 years, and I have found that although my cup size is the same, my proportions are much more balanced and my boobs appear bigger. It really does work, but it takes a while for girls to build up that kind of "bulk." And I don't look at all muscle-y. the key is to build muscle without loosing any fat, because it is only when you loose too much fat that your muscles become defined and start to look manly.


Yes, Summertime, my favorite time of year but it can be tough at the pool or beach. Especially when seeing or being with younger girls that not only have "out-boobed" me but also have those curves and are simply taller and leggier, my 16 year old sister was one of them. But its good that you are dealing with it much better with it Angie, I hope that I can get to the point that your are at now someday.

I also hope that my workout regimen still continues to help me get more shape and curves, I do not want to wind up with "manly definition".
honeybunch
((((loonydaray)))))

In a way I dont' feel bad about being out-boobed. If you looked, some of the girls have bigger boobs than their mommas. ohmy.gif
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(honeybunch @ Mar 20 2009, 10:11 AM) *
In a way I dont' feel bad about being out-boobed. If you looked, some of the girls have bigger boobs than their mommas. ohmy.gif


That's good that you don't. smile.gif

I have seen the same thing as well, girls with bigger breasts than their mothers. One of my close freinds who is 40 and is a nice C cup has a 15 year old daughter that is a D. And her 14 year old (from her 2nd husband) is already her equal with a C too. These things are simply a result of different things, including nutrition, genetics (you'd be suprised what they can get from even their father's side of the family) or maybe just simple "evolution" for the want of a better word. But I am sure of you have seen your own instances as well.

But my mom does not have antyhting to worry about with me biggrin.gif.

honeybunch
QUOTE(Allison-Shine @ Mar 20 2009, 11:13 AM) *
That's good that you don't. smile.gif

I have seen the same thing as well, girls with bigger breasts than their mothers. One of my close freinds who is 40 and is a nice C cup has a 15 year old daughter that is a D. And her 14 year old (from her 2nd husband) is already her equal with a C too. These things are simply a result of different things, including nutrition, genetics (you'd be suprised what they can get from even their father's side of the family) or maybe just simple "evolution" for the want of a better word. But I am sure of you have seen your own instances as well.

But my mom does not have antyhting to worry about with me biggrin.gif.


I do feel out-boobed at times, but saying that to myself lessens it...sometimes.

I sure wish I had inherited the type of figures on my dad's side of the family! I mean 36-26-38 type figures. They look fantastic!
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(honeybunch @ Mar 20 2009, 07:06 PM) *
I do feel out-boobed at times, but saying that to myself lessens it...sometimes.

I sure wish I had inherited the type of figures on my dad's side of the family! I mean 36-26-38 type figures. They look fantastic!


Geez, the things that "Busties" say on here that are so true. My 16 year old "little" sis is 36-26-36. Talk about coincindences!

And umm yes, she looks fantastic. LOL
strongirl
I think the age thing may be coming up again here but to my personal aesthetics, 36-26-36 is not "fantastic". It's too big, everywhere. I think of that figure type as zaftig, cow-like, matronly.

While I embrace diversity and definitely appeciate and love larger women's figures, I have had to work at it. I am stuck with the ideals from the 60's and 70's - Twiggy, Edie Sedgwick, Goldie Hawn in her Laugh-In days. An extra ounce of bodyfat on myself and I feel fat.

There is beauty in every body, I truly believe that. But when I hear you girls bemoan your smallness compared to family members with those big, curvy bodies I just have to notice the difference in my own inner reaction. I feel sorry for them and glad I have a small, tight, athletic body. I would never say anything unkind to them about it and I hope that they feel just as happy with their lot as I do with mine, but that is defiinitely part of my reaction.

I'm not proud of this and I only throw it out here in case it helps any of you view yourselves more favorably. The ideal for all of us would be to stop making negative comparisons, whether we come out ahead or behind.





edie52
It really depends on height, strongirl. My measurements are slightly bigger than that (besides the bust), and I have never been called any of those words (partially because of my small bust, probably). I'm 5'10", and considered slender-to-average. And many supermodels (also tall), are considered stick-thin at slightly under these measurements (I know this from reading style.com!).

I hate thinking about measurement and sizes, we definitely all need to work towards self-acceptance and self-confidence outside of these molds. I appreciate the honesty in your post and how much you love your body, but I have to admit I cringed when I read the first paragraph of your last post, even as someone who is far from zaftig.
angie_21
Ha ha at 5'7" and 36-30-43, I would loooove to have those measurements. I know I am no longer anywhere near slender but I doubt anyone would describe me as matronly. And my big fat booty is generally highly appreciated by the boys. However, I can see where you're coming from, an athletic figure is awesome. I think it is great that you love your body stronggirl, and not at all insulted! You have your preferences, and I have mine, and all body types have a beauty in their own way.

I read an interesting book a few years ago ("A House for Mr. Biswas" interesting title too!) about a man who felt "tied down" to his family and many children, and fantazed about being with a woman with small breasts because he associated large breasts with "matronly" women like his wife and mother. It was interesting to see the cultural differences in perception - I think it took place in Trinidad. In the book, small breasts symbolised youthful and sexually liberated women, and I think were also considered a bit exotic.
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(strongirl @ Mar 21 2009, 04:38 PM) *
I think the age thing may be coming up again here but to my personal aesthetics, 36-26-36 is not "fantastic". It's too big, everywhere. I think of that figure type as zaftig, cow-like, matronly.

While I embrace diversity and definitely appeciate and love larger women's figures, I have had to work at it. I am stuck with the ideals from the 60's and 70's - Twiggy, Edie Sedgwick, Goldie Hawn in her Laugh-In days. An extra ounce of bodyfat on myself and I feel fat.

There is beauty in every body, I truly believe that. But when I hear you girls bemoan your smallness compared to family members with those big, curvy bodies I just have to notice the difference in my own inner reaction. I feel sorry for them and glad I have a small, tight, athletic body. I would never say anything unkind to them about it and I hope that they feel just as happy with their lot as I do with mine, but that is defiinitely part of my reaction.

I'm not proud of this and I only throw it out here in case it helps any of you view yourselves more favorably. The ideal for all of us would be to stop making negative comparisons, whether we come out ahead or behind.



I was disarmed by your first paragraph myself as well. If anything around 36-26-36 or larger is cow-like, then most women out there then qualify. Why must we be so stringent in society on what is perceived as "not fat or plump". Having a slender figure (like mine at 32-24-34, if anyone needs to know "the numbers") is unattainable for many women, we are not all born to be Twiggy, Kate Moss, the chick who played Ally McBeal or even me, LOL.

But the rest of your post makes very good points, it helps a little bit.
crinoline
I don't think the terms "cow-like" or "matronly" are at all loving appreciative or respectful, strongirl. Please remember that while this IS a thread for small breast support, the key word there is support. Can't we try to support each other without resorting to putting others down?

The Venus de Milo, which is not large breasted, has a 35-26-38 figure and is mathematically perfectly proportioned. Do you really look at Classical sculpture of female nudes and see cows?

Anyway, while I agree with your final point that we should strive for an ideal where we don't make negative comparisons, I think it would be nice to also strive for an ideal where we don't use such negative and hurtful language toward other women who don't happen to have the same body type we do.

solaria
it's been a while since I've gotten measured, I don't know my measurements any more. I've always been on the petite side though, between a size 4 and 6, and wear a 34A bra. I always thought of the "tight, athletic" body as the ideal, and tried to match it. It wasn't until I started taking bellydance classes that I started to truly appreciate really curvy bodies, and actually wishing for bigger hips and a even a round belly and butt.
I don't think "matronly" or "cow-like" should even be insults-- they both really mean "motherly" right? Like a mama cow? I wish our culture valued mothers more and could see the matron as a beautiful thing. Hopefully some people do.
honeybunch
I don't think they look like cows. Matronly? Maybe. Cows? No. It definitely doesn't sound too loving in that context. I was 36-30-40 at 5'5, and never got called matronly. I guess it's the relatively small boobs?

Aithinne
Kind of off topic, sorry ladies.. But I found this article when I was feeling a little down about being curveless, and loved it.

About the author of "Real Women Have Curves".
KeraBear
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Mar 19 2009, 11:25 AM) *
But now I try to appreciate everyone as people (after all, if we are judging so many people on their boobs, then we are just as shallow as the teenage boys who made us feel bad in the first place!


Interestingly enough, it seems I got more crap from other GIRLS about my tiny breasts than the boys.
angie_21
QUOTE(KeraBear @ Mar 24 2009, 07:14 AM) *
Interestingly enough, it seems I got more crap from other GIRLS about my tiny breasts than the boys.


I definitely got some negative comments from some boys. The best was once at work, walking past a class lineup of junior high boys, I heard one say to his buddy "hey, she's hot," (yay!) and the other reply, "no, look, she's totally flat" (sooo embarrassing!) Of course I remember it for the negative comment, not the positive one. In the end, I know that boys that young haven't seen a lot of girls naked (in real life, anyways) and learn most of their ideas about what's hot or not from TV and porn. At my age, most guys I choose to hang out with know by now that it's what a girl can do that's hot, not how she looks.

Thinking more carefully, I would say most of the negative thoughts I had were my own or (just like the boys) were learned from TV and magazines
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(KeraBear @ Mar 24 2009, 09:14 AM) *
Interestingly enough, it seems I got more crap from other GIRLS about my tiny breasts than the boys.


Oh me too, I never thought that it would turn out that way. I get it from my sister, her friend and usually girls who are younger and bustier than I am.
KeraBear
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Mar 24 2009, 06:03 PM) *
I definitely got some negative comments from some boys. The best was once at work, walking past a class lineup of junior high boys, I heard one say to his buddy "hey, she's hot," (yay!) and the other reply, "no, look, she's totally flat" (sooo embarrassing!) Of course I remember it for the negative comment, not the positive one. In the end, I know that boys that young haven't seen a lot of girls naked (in real life, anyways) and learn most of their ideas about what's hot or not from TV and porn. At my age, most guys I choose to hang out with know by now that it's what a girl can do that's hot, not how she looks.

Thinking more carefully, I would say most of the negative thoughts I had were my own or (just like the boys) were learned from TV and magazines


Don't get me wrong, i've still had my share of mean comments from guys. I remember in sixth grade, a boy called me "the braless wonder" (cuz I wasn't wearing one yet) and my freshman year, another told me i have "nipples on my ribs". STOOPID IMMATURE BOYS! sad.gif

Good point about the media influence though. And now that you mention it, I think you are right about how when all is said and done ultimately most of the negativity comes from ourselves.
Aithinne
You know, I will be really excited when small boobs become the beauty statement when the whole population is full of women with humungous breasts. We smallies will become the exotic minorty.. lol.
karategrrl
Hey ladies, just logging on again after a weeklong hiatus. Strongirl, I have to say I appreciate your comments and honesty. I have the athletic body but always idealized the curvy type and wished it was mine. Not to put "curvies" down, but you have reminded me to look for the beauty in my own type. I often remind myself but it helps to hear it from someone else.

I went to the baby shower of a close friend over the weekend. This is someone who was also always very small-breasted, and at one point was scheduled for breast augmentation. Anyhoo, there she was, pregnant, saying how she finally had her B-cups but she doesn't feel ANY DIFFERENT about her body, even with the bigger breasts. I knew at that moment I had to share with you all.
karategrrl
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Mar 29 2009, 06:33 PM) *
You know, I will be really excited when small boobs become the beauty statement when the whole population is full of women with humungous breasts. We smallies will become the exotic minorty.. lol.

CAN THIS PLEASE HAPPEN SOON??!! biggrin.gif
karategrrl
QUOTE(starship @ Mar 29 2009, 03:57 PM) *

Funny how they sound apologetic that they can only augment one cup size. That'd be enough for me!
Aithinne
Where did everybody go? I miss you all... sad.gif I saw the Tyra Show today and they had a repeat episode on about boobs and butts. They had guys on there talk about their opinions, and they seemed like decent guys, so it was a somewhat positive small boobie show. What I've noticed is that when guys say they are 'boob men', they usually mean they are 'large boob men'. Does this bother anyone else? Why can't a 'boob man' mean that they like them small too?

They also had pairs of girls on there, one with small boobs and the other with larger ones, and they had them switch sizes, gave the smallies some great padded bras and taped down the boobs of the larger breasted girls. One of the larger breasted women that had hers taped down was at a bar scene and commented after about how she actually had to 'try' when talking to guys. Wow, was all I could think to that.

They need to find at least one guy that likes small boobs for those shows.
strongirl
Hi Aithinne. For my part, I've been traveling and had other things going on lately. I just looked down and my boobs are still there but they have not been anywhere near the top of my priority list.

"Why can't a 'boob man' mean that they like them small too?" I think it can. In a conversation about body issues with my bf a while back, he said "I'm definitely a 'boob man'...just not necessarily a large boob man."

Something else interesting that I've noticed about him recently is that touching my breasts is part of his normal greeting/parting/affection behavior. Like when he comes home from work, we'll hug, kiss, and he'll casually touch my tits and ass, not as foreplay but just as an affectionate greeting. Is this common? I have never really experienced it before him. I do love it, tho.
Aithinne
Oh that's so good to hear... Yay for small boobie men! And I think it's awesome that he has that greeting. I'd welcome that from a guy I was with. Sounds yummy. tongue.gif
quakererelf
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Apr 8 2009, 12:52 PM) *
Oh that's so good to hear... Yay for small boobie men! And I think it's awesome that he has that greeting. I'd welcome that from a guy I was with. Sounds yummy. tongue.gif



A friend of mine is way into boobs. I think he tends toward enjoying larger breasts, but definitely appreciates the smaller ones too. Once, at a clothing optional camping event he told me I have the nicest A cups he's ever seen and would love to have a breasts of all sizes competition, but that he hadn't been able to find a competitor for me.

That felt nice.
karategrrl
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Apr 7 2009, 10:36 PM) *
Where did everybody go? I miss you all... sad.gif I saw the Tyra Show today and they had a repeat episode on about boobs and butts. They had guys on there talk about their opinions, and they seemed like decent guys, so it was a somewhat positive small boobie show. What I've noticed is that when guys say they are 'boob men', they usually mean they are 'large boob men'. Does this bother anyone else? Why can't a 'boob man' mean that they like them small too?
...

They need to find at least one guy that likes small boobs for those shows.

Yay for small-boob-lover men! Remember "P-LoverRay?" on this forum? Maybe small boobed men should all go by "SB-Lover_(name_here)_." No? Just a thought.

Something that occurred to me is that maybe we don't often hear much on TV or whatever from small breast appreciators because maybe they're just generally not as vocal as others. I mean, think about it--if men are going to thump their chests and boom how much they love breasts, it will likely be in a setting where it is also expected that they like BIG ones.

I saw an indie film a few years back called "Murderball" (about paralyzed wheelchair rugby players). It was awesome for what it was, of course, but I for one will NEVER forget a scene where the players were all having drinks and doing their guy-talk thing about women's bodies, and one of the men spoke out and (in contrast to all the others) said, "I don't like big tits!" No, nothing against big tits,of course, but it was SO awesome for this guy to acknowledge smallies and also to go against the others and stand firm. Yes, ladies, they are out there. Rare but precious. Small breast lovers, we salute you.
angie_21
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Apr 7 2009, 04:36 PM) *
What I've noticed is that when guys say they are 'boob men', they usually mean they are 'large boob men'. Does this bother anyone else? Why can't a 'boob man' mean that they like them small too?


But then all men would be boob men! There aren't many who don't like them at all lol. I think that "boob men" are the ones with more of a fetish towards largers sizes, and they somehow get more attention, and guys who appreciate them in all shapes and sizes are everyone else. Also, "small boob" men are totally out there, because they have their own section in the porn store. Unfortunately, that section gets mixed up with the "barely legal" category since small breasts are apparenlty associated with youth and virginity.. (probably because your boobs do grow after pregnancy, must be a very antiquated idea)

lol karategirl, maybe men are overcompensating for their own shortcomings by always talking about size with boobs. (I actually did date a guy in high school who complained about the size of my boobs, but as I soon found out, had a twinkie-sized penis. talk about a double standard!)

And yeah strongirl, my bf does that too, as long as we're not in public lol. I also like to give him a quick grab now and then, and he sure loves that! It is an affection thing, we both like to be very physical in how we show our affection and 9 times out of 10 it has nothing to do with sex.
karategrrl
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Apr 9 2009, 02:57 PM) *
Also, "small boob" men are totally out there, because they have their own section in the porn store. Unfortunately, that section gets mixed up with the "barely legal" category since small breasts are apparenlty associated with youth and virginity

Yes, I have noticed this and don't like it. However, if one must find a positive slant to this, I suppose it's better to be likened to a young woman than a lot of other things.

QUOTE(angie_21 @ Apr 9 2009, 02:57 PM) *
lol karategirl, maybe men are overcompensating for their own shortcomings by always talking about size with boobs. (I actually did date a guy in high school who complained about the size of my boobs, but as I soon found out, had a twinkie-sized penis. talk about a double standard!)

LOL! laugh.gif I do hope you sent Twinkie Man packing! (Not for his size, but for his hypocrisy.)
crinoline
yeah, a few years ago I really got onto my boy because almost all of his porn was "teen/barely legal" stuff, which icks me out in a big way. Then he pointed out, with examples, that in the porn industry those terms are usually just code for petite/ small breasts, the body type that he's most attracted to and that I am. I sort of calmed down after I saw how old the actresses usually are (not teens)

lol Twinkieman! You know I've noticed that most of the guys who care too much about /are way too critical of their girlfriend's appearance are not the most attractive guys themselves, both physically and otherwise.
karategrrl
QUOTE(crinoline @ Apr 9 2009, 08:05 PM) *
yeah, a few years ago I really got onto my boy because almost all of his porn was "teen/barely legal" stuff, which icks me out in a big way. Then he pointed out, with examples, that in the porn industry those terms are usually just code for petite/ small breasts, the body type that he's most attracted to and that I am. I sort of calmed down after I saw how old the actresses usually are (not teens)

Interesting, "code for petite/small breasts." Yes, I guess that is true a lot of the time! But also yes, serious "ick" if it's not really the breast size or body type they're into, but rather the thought of taking advantage of an underage girl. ...Brings me back to memories of my first BF, who in retrospect, I realize had some serious psychosexual issues. He was all about the really cheap, gross, low-budget "barely legal"-type porn, and had fantasies of raping an underage girl--fantasies he told me about like it was no big deal. Ewwwww.

QUOTE(crinoline @ Apr 9 2009, 08:05 PM) *
lol Twinkieman! You know I've noticed that most of the guys who care too much about /are way too critical of their girlfriend's appearance are not the most attractive guys themselves, both physically and otherwise.

I second that emotion! I won't name any names, but what I notice most often is the heavy men criticizing "fat" women. Uhhh....yeah, right.
strongirl
My bf also complains of having a hard time finding the body-type he prefers in porn. He likes a natural look (minimal makeup, natural hair), athletic/muscular, small breasts. Sort of the anti-Playboy look. He'd probably be better off watching the Olympics if they could just do it naked like the original ones in ancient Greece! smile.gif
karategrrl
QUOTE(strongirl @ Apr 10 2009, 10:39 PM) *
My bf also complains of having a hard time finding the body-type he prefers in porn. He likes a natural look (minimal makeup, natural hair), athletic/muscular, small breasts. Sort of the anti-Playboy look. He'd probably be better off watching the Olympics if they could just do it naked like the original ones in ancient Greece! smile.gif

I knew men could appreciate all different kinds of bodies, but I'm flattered to know there are actually men who PREFER what happens to be my body type over the Playboy "ideal." Thank you, God(dess), there is hope! laugh.gif
angie_21
Ha ha Twinkieman! I love it. Now that I think about it, he was generally critical of girls' appearance all the time, not just about boobs (he just happened to fixate on that with me). Unfortunately, I didn't send him packing for a while, it was my first big romantice relationship and I didn't know any better. Now, that guy wouldn't have lasted past a first date without a slap in the face!

Oddly enough, I was just discussing all the difficulties with porn with my bf yesterday. Not to get too off topic.. but we came to the conclusion that by the time you've found a cast of people willing to have sex in front of a camera for hours at a time, you aren't necessarily going to have a cast of people who are actually very sexy, or very good at sex. His major complaint is about the implants - if you want to see girls who don't have implants, you pretty much have to go for the "barely legal" stuff because its the only porn that seeks out girls with small boobs. I don't find that category of porn to be any creepier than the others, and while I wish there was good stuff out there, pretty much all porn skeeves me out, between the bored look on people's faces and the intense fixation on anal sex and inordinate amount of time spent on close-up shots of crotches and bums.

But I digress. I still strongly believe that for most guys, what they want to see is perky, bouncy, nicely shaped boobs, of any size, and as long as they get to see them naked, they are happy. Big boobs get all the attention because they are just easier to see, especially when girls are otherwise fully clothed.
strongirl
OK, so on the porn thing, my bf and I watched a 1979 softcore flick over the weekend, and we both loved it! Alcohol might have had something to do with that, so I'd love to get some of you to watch it and hear your opinions. It's called "Felicity" and it's about a young woman (in boarding school so the implication is that she's an older teen but it's definitely not of the "barely legal" porn variety) coming of age and exploring her sexuality, both at school and on a trip to Hong Kong. Aside from the cheesy '70s music (which made us laugh), it was amazingly good quality - it had a complex plot compared to most porn (so those of you who like story and context and not just body part shots should appreciate that), likeable characters, humor, and the sex scenes really worked for both of us. It was surprisingly hot! And - get this - NO implants whatsoever! No "super-sized" boobs at all! The main character is quite small-breasted and the camera just loves her little titties!

All the things we in this forum criticize about porn seem to be absent from this movie.

My only complaint was the lack of male nudity (one brief scene was it). And the final "romance" was a bit silly, I thought. But all in all...two thumbs up.

I urge you all to check it out! Watch it with your boyfriends! Let me know what you think!
Aithinne
Ok, so I am so tired of being single that I'm ready to snap. I'm kind of a homebody, but I've been really wanting to go out recently and meet people. My best friend is even more of a homebody, and it's hard to get her to go anywhere. So, I think I'm going to have to go out by myself, though I don't know if it's a good idea or how to do it since I'm kind of shy about meeting people.

But, I think when I do go out, I've been thinking about going braless. What do you think? Should I? I'm just thinking of different ways I can stand out. I don't dress skanky when I go out, like many women my age do, because I don't feel comfortable doing that. but maybe going sans-bra would have a similar effect? Don't know what shirt I'd wear, though, that would look best without one. I do have a white v-neck tank that looks great on me without a bra, but since it's white and pretty thin, you can see pretty much everything.
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Apr 15 2009, 05:49 PM) *
Ok, so I am so tired of being single that I'm ready to snap. I'm kind of a homebody, but I've been really wanting to go out recently and meet people. My best friend is even more of a homebody, and it's hard to get her to go anywhere. So, I think I'm going to have to go out by myself, though I don't know if it's a good idea or how to do it since I'm kind of shy about meeting people.

But, I think when I do go out, I've been thinking about going braless. What do you think? Should I? I'm just thinking of different ways I can stand out. I don't dress skanky when I go out, like many women my age do, because I don't feel comfortable doing that. but maybe going sans-bra would have a similar effect? Don't know what shirt I'd wear, though, that would look best without one. I do have a white v-neck tank that looks great on me without a bra, but since it's white and pretty thin, you can see pretty much everything.


I go braless sometimes when going out, but I never risk wearing white or lighter colors for obvious reasons. I am more likely to go braless in a black or any other dark color top. I don't worry about "control" up there since I am only a b-cup and fairly firm. I think dressing sexy in a subtle manner may get you the most desired attention. Anything less can lead to too much ummm "unwanted attention" lol.
angie_21
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Apr 15 2009, 03:49 PM) *
I'm just thinking of different ways I can stand out. I don't dress skanky when I go out, like many women my age do, because I don't feel comfortable doing that. but maybe going sans-bra would have a similar effect?


Unfortunately, the best way to get attention at the bar these days seems to be to look exactly like every other little hoochie in the bar. But it all depends on what kind of attention you want. If you aren't comfortable dressing skanky, do you really think you will be any more comfortable with your nipples showing? I almost feel that wearing a white shirt like that, no matter that your size, might get you more negative attention than anything, even at a bar full of horny guys. At least, it would at the conservative places I've lived.

I know I wouldn't be able to do it! I go braless often, but usually when wearing a casual t-shirt at home, or wearing those tank tops with an extra nipple covering layer. My strategy when going out is generally to wear a push up bra that hikes my poor little boobies up to high heaven (or at least one that fakes a B-cup). I agree with Allsion, there are many different approaches to looking sexy and being too obvious (white shirt) usually isn't the best approach. Having a no bra and a dark shirt would show a little something without being too obvious I think.
strongirl
Aithinne, Consider this: Go to a class, or a seminar, or a political meeting, or a dance class, or a running club, or a house party...pursue an interest of yours instead of going to a bar. Wear something that makes you feel great, something that when you look in the mirror pleases you. Express yourself in your clothes. Don't wear something uncomfortable. Be nice to everyone - men and women. That is sure to make you "stand out"! Be open and let people see who you are. Find out who they are. Everyone has their story. Don't hesitate to flirt playfully. Show your sense of humor. If there are kids or pets there, pay them special attention.

I don't think you'll stay single for long with this approach.

P.S. I don't think it really matters whether you wear a bra or not or what kind if so. What matters is that you feel good in what you wear. Some women feel more comfortable showing their bodies than others. If you feel comfortable going braless, go for it!

Aithinne
I actually am braless a lot. Pretty much the minute I get home, it's adios to the stupid bra. And I don't sleep in anything but my underwear, so I'm probably braless for most of the hours in a day. But I've never gone out and purposely wore no bra. Sometimes I have run errands without a bra, but I usually have some type of sweater to prevent the nips from showing. So I'm pretty comfortable with being braless. And actually, when I was in college, I sometimes went to class without a bra on. I've just never NOT had a bra on when I was looking for a guy. I just don't know if it would change how I would feel, or if it would change a guy's perception of me. If I do go out braless, I will definitely wear a dark shirt so it's not as noticable. I just haven't heard on this forum any stories of us smallies going out on the town without a bra. Was curious to know how it turned out for them...
angie_21
I don't, but mainly because I prefer to have the little lift in volume that lined bras give, not because of the nipple problem. My shirts fit better with a bra on just because of the extra half inch lined/padded bras provide. I do tend to feel self-conscious when I go out without one, but more because I can feel my boobs moving around a lot more and I notice that they are there, and imagine that other people must as well. I know that my bf loves that I don't wear a bra around the house. I love that feeling right when I get home and throw off the bra, and my boobies breathe a sigh of relief. So freeing.

Remember back in the day when it used to be a feminist statement not to wear a bra? Now its slutty. So weird. I say do whatever makes you happy. Though I still would never wear white shirt with no bra. There was a girl with c-cups who used to show up at one of my classes like that and go up to talk to the professor every day before class with her nipples all out there, in front of 30 people... it was kinda creepy, and obvious that she was just trying to get better grades somehow.
karategrrl
Okay, maybe this is a bit of a stretch, but have you guys seen the performance by Susan Boyle on Britain's Got Talent? I mean, we talk so much here about first impressions and what it means when people treat you a certain way based on their impressions of big breasts/small breasts/body type/big butt, etc.

Talk about first impressions being wrong. This woman has the voice of an angel. Here's a clip from the show if you haven't seen it.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2009/apr/1...ains-got-talent
Aithinne
I know! I saw her and she was amazing! Before she started singing, she did that little dance, and I was like, oh no... But then she started singing and I was like, holy cow!
karategrrl
I just found this, too--very interesting comments about ugly women vs. ugly men. How true, how true.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/20...ent-susan-boyle
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Apr 16 2009, 10:50 AM) *
There was a girl with c-cups who used to show up at one of my classes like that and go up to talk to the professor every day before class with her nipples all out there, in front of 30 people... it was kinda creepy, and obvious that she was just trying to get better grades somehow.


I hate when people act so cheap and obvious like that. Even if I was "well endowed" with a C-cup or better I wouldn't do anything like that.
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