Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
The BUST Lounge > Forums > Our Bodies, Our Hells
Pages: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85
Persephone3
Some great posts here. I just wanted to add that I don't feel that sexiness in entirely dependant on physical appearance. It's more of an attitude. I know you have all probably heard that before, but it doesn't make it any less true.

There is this book I read that I'm almost hesitant to recommend because the title is so vile. It's called "Why Men Love Bitches" by Sherry Argov. Even though I am not in the dating scene, I had to pick it up because I though it contained some great advice, whether you are in a relationship or not. It does not have to do specifically with breasts, but has a lot of good advice regarding your attitude towards yourself, and men.

QUOTE
Uhoh, 'cute'. I used to take the odd suggestive pic for my then-bf when we were living long-distance. This one time I'd made quite an effort (fancy bra, makeup, sultry pouty face haha) and thought i was looking pretty darn hot...until one of his remarks in response was how I'm 'more of a pretty girl than a sexy one'. Yeah, he had a talent for saying the wrong thing. I'm er sure he meant well. I think it's funny now but at the time I was not amused...


I can't even begin to tell you how many inappropriate things men have said to me (and friends through their stories) during the course of my life. I sometimes don't even know what to say. I often just scratch my head, look at them and think 'are you braindead?' And they honestly don't get it...

I'm not sure if my problems are from other peoples opinions, or my own inner dialogue. Probably both.

buttercups
Omg I read the "Why Men Love Bitches" book over the summer and I would totally recommend it haha, I found a lot of it to be quite true ( and I like the author's sense of humor)! Wow you girls have completely described how I feel a lot of the time.

QUOTE
I know, that's ultimately where my insecurity is. I am much better than I was with the small breast insecurity. But now I'm dealing with the cute insecurity and the non-curviness insecurity. Hopefully I can overcome those. But man, I know what you mean.

To knock a man's socks off, to make his eyes bug out when he sees you, to make a guy speechless..... That is my dream. I just don't see cute having that abilit


That is a lot of me in a nutshell! If I could make my bf react to me with awe with this body, well I'm not saying I would feel better about myself...but...it's just an effect I wish I had I guess. I have totally had that experience where you dress up and feel all sexy and then you don't portray that image to others. I feel exactly like you said Aithinne, like the person others perceive me as on the outside is very different from how I see myself inside. I feel like this hot sexy womanly woman, but it seems that others tend to view me as a cute, tiny, short little girl. Even my bf has said on multiple occasions that he thinks I'm "the cutest girl he's ever seen" and I do take that as a compliment. I don't think there's anything wrong with being cute I think it's a great thing to be seen as, but I would def like to be able to be considered other things as well.

And I completely agree that we need to take womanly back along with cute! I'm sick and tired of being made to feel like I'm not a woman. Where the hell did this idea come from?? I mean sometimes I really have felt like being female is this special group that I'm trying to be a part of but for some reason I don't really belong. What the hell?! I most certainly belong! Why have I felt like an outsider to my own gender? I've even identified with transgendered people before because I have so often felt like I'm trying desperately to be a woman and keep missing the mark even though that's all I want to be. I am 100% woman inside and out, and no one should be able to make me feel otherwise!
Aithinne
QUOTE(buttercups @ Sep 6 2009, 12:10 PM) *
That is a lot of me in a nutshell! If I could make my bf react to me with awe with this body, well I'm not saying I would feel better about myself...but...it's just an effect I wish I had I guess.


I know... All I want is to know I am capable of pulling it off if I choose to. But my look is not versatile. I think it's amazingly difficult to turn cute into sexy. I wonder if anyone here has any tips to turn cute into sexy? And I don't mean trampy btw, because I don't think trampy is sexy... trampy is trampy. So you won't see me in a micromini skirt and pasties. I always wanted to learn how to do the smoky eye thing. Maybe I'll take my question to a makeup thread on bust.. Do we even have one of those? I feel bad hijacking the small boobie thread to discuss cuteness, but to me it's still related. Maybe we should create a "Cuteback" thread for a cute-not-sexy-support-group. Yeah, I'd live on that thread. Can we even create a thread, I wonder?

QUOTE(buttercups @ Sep 6 2009, 12:10 PM) *
And I completely agree that we need to take womanly back along with cute! I'm sick and tired of being made to feel like I'm not a woman. Where the hell did this idea come from?? I mean sometimes I really have felt like being female is this special group that I'm trying to be a part of but for some reason I don't really belong. What the hell?! I most certainly belong! Why have I felt like an outsider to my own gender? I've even identified with transgendered people before because I have so often felt like I'm trying desperately to be a woman and keep missing the mark even though that's all I want to be. I am 100% woman inside and out, and no one should be able to make me feel otherwise!


You know, I saw this documentary show on transgendered people that was really interesting. But I was amazed at how much I could relate to them too because they also feel like the outside/inside don't match the image of what 'woman' (or even 'man') is. Feeling like you're in an alien body, the wrong body for your personality.. Very interesting.
angie_21
Wow, this thread has turned up a whole new issue that I think is definitely strongly related to chest size, I don't think it's been hijacked at all! I know I used to have a bit of a problem with people thinking I was cute and innocent, I don't know if it had as much to do with my chest size as the fact that I was very shy and dressed a bit conservatively, and I try to always be nice and friendly to people I meet. But as I grew older I gained a lot of confidence, lost most of my shyness, so even though I still dress pretty conservatively, and physically mught look more "cute" than sexy, my boyfriend says when he met me he knew I would be "a firecracker in the sack!" I was stunned because I thought people still saw me as cute and sweet instead. It has a lot to do I guess, with speaking your mind, making eye contact, and at the time I met him, not being afraid to flirt inappropriately, and to drunkenly discuss things you like to do in bed... not things I should recommend, I guess, but they worked!

As far as turning cuteness into sexiness... I think cuteness is an excellent starting point. It's part of what keeps sexiness from looking trampy. I think the number one thing to be remembered is that confidence and playfulness are so important to being and feeling sexy. It's so much not about how you look, but what you do instead. And what looks cute to one guy, will look smokin' hot to another. I agree the smoky dark eyes look awesome though, I always get tons of compliments when I have that kind of makeup on. You don't really need lessons, it just takes practice. I use dark grey eyeliner and medium grey or purple shadow with a little bit of sparkle to it. I always put on the liner first, then the shadow. When I do just a little bit of the "cat eye" effect, taking the liner and shadow a bit past the outer edge of my eye, that usually looks best. Just keep some eye make-up remover on hand just in case. Little things, like wearing heels that you can hear from down the hallway also get attention and just make you feel sexier.

Aithinne, if you truly want to knock a man's socks off, I wouldn't be overly concerned about how you look, but you might want to check out the "Let's talk about sex" boards and brush up on your blowjob skills... I've never known anything a guy will be more amazed by, or appreciative of. You could be wearing grey sweatpants, if you're good at that, not much else matters.
Aithinne
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Sep 7 2009, 12:31 PM) *
Wow, this thread has turned up a whole new issue that I think is definitely strongly related to chest size, I don't think it's been hijacked at all! I know I used to have a bit of a problem with people thinking I was cute and innocent, I don't know if it had as much to do with my chest size as the fact that I was very shy and dressed a bit conservatively, and I try to always be nice and friendly to people I meet. But as I grew older I gained a lot of confidence, lost most of my shyness, so even though I still dress pretty conservatively, and physically mught look more "cute" than sexy, my boyfriend says when he met me he knew I would be "a firecracker in the sack!" I was stunned because I thought people still saw me as cute and sweet instead. It has a lot to do I guess, with speaking your mind, making eye contact, and at the time I met him, not being afraid to flirt inappropriately, and to drunkenly discuss things you like to do in bed... not things I should recommend, I guess, but they worked!

Hmm.. something to think about. I wonder how I can communicate that I can be a 'firecracker in the sack' too (because I know I can be). I wonder how you could make that impression to a guy without seeming like a tramp, some way to not be passed up because of the cute shell. I don't know how to do that. Maybe it's just one of those things like a look in the eye that really can't get communicated any other way.

QUOTE(angie_21 @ Sep 7 2009, 12:31 PM) *
As far as turning cuteness into sexiness... I think cuteness is an excellent starting point. It's part of what keeps sexiness from looking trampy. I think the number one thing to be remembered is that confidence and playfulness are so important to being and feeling sexy. It's so much not about how you look, but what you do instead. And what looks cute to one guy, will look smokin' hot to another. I agree the smoky dark eyes look awesome though, I always get tons of compliments when I have that kind of makeup on. You don't really need lessons, it just takes practice. I use dark grey eyeliner and medium grey or purple shadow with a little bit of sparkle to it. I always put on the liner first, then the shadow. When I do just a little bit of the "cat eye" effect, taking the liner and shadow a bit past the outer edge of my eye, that usually looks best. Just keep some eye make-up remover on hand just in case. Little things, like wearing heels that you can hear from down the hallway also get attention and just make you feel sexier.

You know, you may have a good point about how cute might keep sexiness from looking trampy. Maybe it adds a little class? Hmm.. I will have to do more studying on whether cute can be sexy. All the ladies with bfs should ask them if cute and sexy are exclusive things. Let's do a survey, shall we? Hope nobody minds if we collect male opinions on the matter?

I think tomorrow on my day off I'm going to go to the mall and try to get one of the makeup ladies to teach me how to do the smoky eye thing. I kind of want to learn how to do it so I can look hot when I go out in a few weeks. My 24th birthday is on the 17th, and I'm going out on the town the next night, so I'm thinking I'll experiment with makeup a bit and see if I can find something that works for me. Maybe then I can be sexy and confident instead of cute and insecure.

QUOTE(angie_21 @ Sep 7 2009, 12:31 PM) *
Aithinne, if you truly want to knock a man's socks off, I wouldn't be overly concerned about how you look, but you might want to check out the "Let's talk about sex" boards and brush up on your blowjob skills... I've never known anything a guy will be more amazed by, or appreciative of. You could be wearing grey sweatpants, if you're good at that, not much else matters.

One could always improve their blowjob skills, yes. But first, cute girl must step out of cute oppression so that erection doesn't fail upon sight of cute girl. Otherwise, cute girl will have to put a bag over her cute head with a hole cutout in it.

I think I'll work on both.
angie_21
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Sep 7 2009, 02:04 PM) *
I wonder how I can communicate that I can be a 'firecracker in the sack' too (because I know I can be). I wonder how you could make that impression to a guy without seeming like a tramp, some way to not be passed up because of the cute shell.


I always used to be afraid of people thiking I was a slut too.. Maybe I still would be, really, if I was stuck in the dating game. but I know that my boyfriend loooves that I am a "slut" whatever that means. If it means I like to have sex, he's all for it. I think this is one of those cases where it's good to care more about what you want, than what people think.

QUOTE(Aithinne @ Sep 7 2009, 02:04 PM) *
All the ladies with bfs should ask them if cute and sexy are exclusive things. Let's do a survey, shall we? Hope nobody minds if we collect male opinions on the matter?


Here was our conversation:

What do you like better, cuteness or sexiness?

-huh? what? Cute, I guess

Why? Can't they be the same thing?

--Yes! I mean, that is why I like cute. Because it's real sexy. Sexiness by itself is just a cover-up for something... wait, what are you talking about? What kind of sexy do you mean?

Well what kind of sexy do you like best?

-What I just said, cute sweet girls. What are you talking about?

The girls on my board want to know if cute can be sexy. They think since they're cute they can't be sexy.

-WHAT? That's stupid. I don't even know what to say. Why do they think there's like 8 million links on the internet to hot teenage girl porn? Because that's the only kind of stuff where you get to see real, pretty, cute girls. Cute girls are the real thing. Why do they think every guy out there wants to get with the "girl next door?"


So there you have it
Aithinne
Yay, angie's bf!

He sounded so confused though... rotflmao!! HAHAHA!
strongirl
LOL, that conversation with your bf is hysterical, Angie! smile.gif And as usual, your posts are full of excellent perspectives and advice.

These recent posts are pretty fascinating in that we're trying to refine and redefine our definitions of "cute", "sexy", "trampy", "womanly" in ways that illuminate their meanings and ourselves. This is empowering stuff.

For myself, I've always felt and been described as "cute" and as "sexy" and I feel very comfortable with both. I've never been called "trampy" to my face and if people say it behind my back, I honestly don't care. I think no matter how you dress or make yourself up, if you make eye contact, if you are polite and honestly interested in other people and considerate of their feelings, if you are confident and show your intelligence, no one is going to call you trampy.

It's interesting that Angie's boyfriend used the word "real". I think being real, honestly putting out who you are and not being afraid to show yourself to others, physically or emotionally, is the sexiest thing anyone can do.

"Womanly"...wow, it's funny but I don't really identify much with that term nor do I care to. This is really weird but I just did a quick "word association" with it in my head and what came up for me was "old", "overweight", and "submissive". I picture the moms of my friends growing up, women who were very tired and oppressed by life, women who gave and never took. Odd that some of you have such a positive connotation to it and I don't. And it's sort of depressing from a feminist standpoint that the word "womanly" would have such a negative association in my head. Sad, really.

On a lighter note, I love the smoky eye thing and have two different versions of it. As my ordinary day makeup, I use a brown eye shadow crayon and just go around the outer corner and then underneath my eye to just past the iris, then smudge it a bit. It's pretty but looks natural and isn't messy if you exercise, cook, let dogs lick your face, etc. When I want to amp it up, I go a bit heavier on the top lid from the center out, add some contouring in the crease, add dark brown eye liner pencil close to the lash line on top and bottom and on the lower inner rim, then add black mascara. I also do a bit of that cat-eye upsweep thing that Angie mentioned. It's a fun way to do eye makeup, and easy.



karategrrl
QUOTE(Persephone3 @ Sep 6 2009, 12:26 AM) *
I can't even begin to tell you how many inappropriate things men have said to me (and friends through their stories) during the course of my life. I sometimes don't even know what to say. I often just scratch my head, look at them and think 'are you braindead?' And they honestly don't get it...

OMG, this is one of my major life themes here, summed up in 4 sentences.
buttercups
Ok Ladies I had my man take our little survey...cept he didnt know what it was for bc I haven't shared this forum with him hahaha, i had to keep making up excuses!

me: what is it better to be- cute or sexy?

Him: ha why?

me: im just curious
Sent at 9:26 PM on Tuesday

Him: i dont think one is better than the other

me: well what is it better to be though

Him: no i mean i dont think one is better than the other

me: well would you rather be with someone who is cute or someone who is sexy


Him: personally? idano...i guess someone whose cute...but id want them to be sexy too so...

me: cant too cute not be sexy?

Him: no i dont think so
if your cute like younger sibling cute then it cant be sexy...but if its just cute like adorable then yea...can be sexy too

me: so when guys tell girls theyre cute what do they mean by that, like if its to some girl you dont necessarily know

Him: i guess it depends

me: on what

Him: the situation
why baby who called you cute!

me: no one im just asking bc im curious

Him: i guess it depends on if hes interested in her or not

me: well i just mean if a guy calls a girl cute what does he generally mean by that

Him: cute/sexy prolly

me: well when girls say a guy is cute they usually mean hot
but when guys say it does it mean the same thing or does it mean like little sister teddy bear

Him: no it usually means hot


Interesting huh? I guess there you have it, cute for guys = hot/sexy. Maybe all this time guys have been callin us smallies sexy bitches and we just never realized it!


Aithinne
Lol!!!

I gotta say, this man-survey is kind of fun! Tee hee. Buttercups, your bf sounds just as confused as angie's bf! Lol!
buttercups
Hahaha he was so confused as to why I was even asking it, it was pretty hilarious!
angie_21
Hee hee, it's funny how confused they get... asking a direct question really scares them, it's like they feel trapped and they don't know what the right answer is!

QUOTE(strongirl @ Sep 8 2009, 07:24 AM) *
It's interesting that Angie's boyfriend used the word "real". I think being real, honestly putting out who you are and not being afraid to show yourself to others, physically or emotionally, is the sexiest thing anyone can do.


He really emphasized REAL, like capital letters, big hand gestures, important! We talk about this a lot, because it a fun topic, but he was a little confused that I brought it up out of nowhere and thought he might be in trouble or something, lol, but I'm pretty sure I know what he was getting at, even though it's hard to express in words. It's about confidence, and about not putting on an act to try to "look" or "talk" sexy. I think that's so true. That's always how I've tried to be, and it's not just about being sexy, it's about your whole life... I think being as honest and open as possible with my friends & family, and when I'm comfortable, strangers and co-workers too, makes my relationships so much better, and makes me a happier person.

being "womanly" or not isn't something I think about much. I never really used to feel like I was, I guess, but I didn't want to be either. But when my boyfriend is trying to tell me I'm hot, sometimes he'll use that word, like "you're all WOMAN" (same capital letters and big hand gestures as with "real" lol). It makes me giggle. He doesn't mean curves, he means, well, sex I think. I don't really know. It's made me change how I view myself though. As long as I never have to think of myself as "ladylike" (ugh. barf) I'll be OK.

To go off on another tangent about these words we're using, because it always bugs me, even though I use these words all the time... I hate words like trampy or trashy or slutty, because it's so irellevant. Slut can mean anything, like someone who wears a short skirt, or had sex before being married, it's sexist and kind of offensive. And sometimes its fun to be trashy. Trampy, same thing. For myself, I don't really want to dress in an unclassy way, I guess, but if someone thought I was trampy because I'm not afraid of my body or because I like sex, well, they can kiss my ass. To me the thing that's sad, is girls who dress a certain way to feel better about themseves by getting attention from asshole-type men... it's not sad because they're showing off their bodies, but because with some girls, it seems like they think that's all they're worth to the world. I hate when it's just purely for men's enjoyment and not their own. But how can I judge that just from looking at a girl? How do I know why she dresses or acts the way she does? It's so weird to me, and I hate that we end up having to use labels like "slut" that don't really express what we're trying to say.
karategrrl
Hey hey ladies,

Saw a friend of mine over the weekend, and she had had that fat transfer procedure--the Dr. sucked fat from her stomach and transferred it to her breasts. What's important to note is that she was already a fairly big girl with (sorry, no sensitive way to say it) fat stores on her belly and butt. She's had a child and already had medium- to-large-ish breasts, but they were deflated-looking, and she did not like that.

Well, she flashed me in the bathroom and I have to say that from my quick peek, it looks like the Dr. did a very good job, though her breasts were quite veiny and that did not look too good (I kept that opinion to myself). Basically, though, her breasts were filled up with enough fat to, well, kind of fill them out. And like I said, since she is a kind of large-framed girl, the new size complemented her overall figure. Yes, they looked noticeably large, but not absurdly so, and with natural-looking "hang." She was complaining of tons of pain in her stomach (where the fat was taken from). She'd only had the procedure a week prior.

My friend is no stranger to cosmetic procedures, so I am not surprised she'd done this. However, I looked online and found a lot of places where people have advised against it due to dimpling where the fat was taken from and problems with the transferred fat. Also interesting to note: The procedure is actually longer, more complicated, and more expensive than implants, and also more painful to recover from (due to trauma to at least 2 body areas, not just one). Also, sometimes the fat dissipates over time and you're left right back where you were before.

When I first saw her, I actually thought, "wow, maybe I'll look into this for myself." I just did and the thought of any kind of surgery--and its risks--turns my stomach. Besides, I have been doing a lot of running and have lost weight. My friend said she actually had to gain more weight before the procedure. It would take me ages to gain adequate weight to transfer anywhere, and I just am not that motivated. I'll stay with my little "cute" ones! (and yes, I did intentionally use the word "cute!") smile.gif

It will be interesting to see how the results of her procedure pan out over time. For her sake, I do hope there are no complications but I'll keep y'all posted.
Aithinne
QUOTE(angie_21 @ Sep 9 2009, 09:07 PM) *
To go off on another tangent about these words we're using, because it always bugs me, even though I use these words all the time... I hate words like trampy or trashy or slutty, because it's so irellevant. Slut can mean anything, like someone who wears a short skirt, or had sex before being married, it's sexist and kind of offensive. And sometimes its fun to be trashy. Trampy, same thing. For myself, I don't really want to dress in an unclassy way, I guess, but if someone thought I was trampy because I'm not afraid of my body or because I like sex, well, they can kiss my ass. To me the thing that's sad, is girls who dress a certain way to feel better about themseves by getting attention from asshole-type men... it's not sad because they're showing off their bodies, but because with some girls, it seems like they think that's all they're worth to the world. I hate when it's just purely for men's enjoyment and not their own. But how can I judge that just from looking at a girl? How do I know why she dresses or acts the way she does? It's so weird to me, and I hate that we end up having to use labels like "slut" that don't really express what we're trying to say.


I kind of have a tough time defining those words too. I think a lot of people define those words as a girl (always a girl, right? Never a guy!) who sleeps with men like a revolving door, a different one every day. Although, I don't necessarily think that women who do this are bad women who should be shunned. Who a woman wants to have sex with or how many is no one's business.

But, how I tend to think about these words has more to do with the mindset of the woman behind this type of revolving door sex life. Women who think their entire self worth is tied up in how many men they can get to notice them, the women who are so shallow with so little self respect that they don't care about themselves, only how many men they can sleep with and then validate themselves through. They're women who have no depth or redeeming qualities who engage in the behaviors above.

I don't think a good woman with her head on straight, with good character who just happens to like having a lot of sex, a slut or tramp.

Interesting topic extension angie! We may have to take slutback too!
karategrrl
QUOTE(Aithinne @ Sep 10 2009, 03:20 PM) *
We may have to take slutback too!

laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif
buttercups
Goin on a date with the boy toy tonight, and while i was getting dressed i tried on this top ive never worn without my huge padded inserts and guess what? i actually think it looks better on this itty bitty chest without all those "accessories". who woulda thought? Guess some tops really do look better on us little busties..
Aithinne
QUOTE(buttercups @ Sep 11 2009, 04:23 PM) *
Goin on a date with the boy toy tonight, and while i was getting dressed i tried on this top ive never worn without my huge padded inserts and guess what? i actually think it looks better on this itty bitty chest without all those "accessories". who woulda thought? Guess some tops really do look better on us little busties..

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! tongue.gif
buttercups
Ugh i just read another article about that fat-depositing procedure karategrrl was talking about. I dont know why but it just made me feel really depressed. I guess that's because it seemed like women were finally waking up and accepting their bodies more and realizing implants were dangerous and taking them out, and now we're gonna have another surge of breast augmentation. Everyone is gonna be rushing to get this procedure done now and I'm gonna keep on feeling insecure in a sea of massive breasts. Although surgery would also be an option for me, i don't think i have enough fat on any other part of my body since I'm a small girl everywhere, and I am also terrified of surgery and wouldnt be able to fund it. I just want society to move towards thinking small breasts are beautiful, and with all these augmentation procedures out there it seems like I will keep on being labeled as inadequate by the world. blah.
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(buttercups @ Sep 14 2009, 08:08 PM) *
Ugh i just read another article about that fat-depositing procedure karategrrl was talking about. I dont know why but it just made me feel really depressed. I guess that's because it seemed like women were finally waking up and accepting their bodies more and realizing implants were dangerous and taking them out, and now we're gonna have another surge of breast augmentation. Everyone is gonna be rushing to get this procedure done now and I'm gonna keep on feeling insecure in a sea of massive breasts. Although surgery would also be an option for me, i don't think i have enough fat on any other part of my body since I'm a small girl everywhere, and I am also terrified of surgery and wouldnt be able to fund it. I just want society to move towards thinking small breasts are beautiful, and with all these augmentation procedures out there it seems like I will keep on being labeled as inadequate by the world. blah.



I know that you are smaller than most but not all of us are busty collectively making up that "sea of massive breasts". I have my insecurites still but I do see a lot smaller women out there too.

I don't think a fat transfer would make a shapely bust. Since when is the fat on anywhere else your body flattering and toned?
strongirl
Buttercups, you are not being "labeled as inadequate by the world". Only by yourself, and only on bad days.

I've always had mixed feelings about the whole "change your head" versus "change your body" thing. There's just so much depth to this issue. Generally speaking I think it's healthier to change your head in most cases. At the same time, I try not to slam those who opt to change their bodies.

Has anyone seen the documentary "Modify"? It is NOT for the faint of heart nor weak of stomach, LOL, but it is a fascinating look at extreme body modifications, why people do them, and what it all means and doesn't mean. From Stalking Cat, a guy who has surgically altered and tattooed himself to closely resemble a human cat, to people who hang in the air on hooks through their flesh, to people who get their tongues forked, I came away with a renewed sense of the importance of letting people make their own choices about how to live in their bodies and being non-judgmental and accepting about the wide range of forms that can take. Mind you I would NEVER want to do stuff like that to my body! But I respect others' right to do what they want without passing judgment on them.

By FAR the grossest and most horrifying thing in the film was when they showed breast implants being removed - I actually screamed and hid my face in my boyfriends chest - meanwhile, he had his eyes shut tight. It was awful seeing those shiny plasticky blobs falling out of a split open breast flap that looked like a bloody fresh steak. Gawd! My bf said "Please don't ever mutilate your breasts like that!"

So while I support anyone who feels they can't be happy unless they have their upper lip split to resemble a feline, or who wants breast implants, at the same time I don't think that sort of thing is healthy for most people. It's not for me. And as a woman I resent the pressure to alter myself to meet some marketing ideal. Ditto the fat transfer thing. I agree, Buttercups, I don't want to see a "sea of massive breasts" and it is alarming how the bar has been set higher and higher on what "large" is. I might have mentioned in here before that I was paging through an issue of Playboy that had multiple pics of various women on one page and my eye went to the one that looked "small and natural". It was Betty Page, the 50's pinup model, who was at the time known for her voluptuousness. Next to all the fake boobs, she actually looked small-breasted! That's how much our visual standard has been warped by the social phenomenon of implants.

I'm obviously all over the place on this issue and rambling so Ill stop...but I guess what I will tell myself and what may help you, Buttercups, is that while I respect other people's right to alter their bodies if they so choose, I prefer to love and enjoy mine in its natural state and be secure in the knowledge that small breasts are lovely, natural, and healthy and as such, quite sexy.



Aithinne
Well, I think the body modification to look like a cat, etc is different (or coming from a different head space) than women who modify their breasts through breast augmentation. I think many women get a boob job to try to fit in with everyone else, and to feel normal and attractive, but I doubt the guy that got modified to look like a cat got it to fit in! He probably wanted to be different than everyone else!

I always try to think that maybe if a whole slew of women get breast implants then the smallies will become an exotic minority. Maybe then small breasts will be more noticable since no one would have them anymore! And if you really think about it, it would be awfully boring to see the 'same woman' everywhere you go.
angie_21
When my mom had reconstructive surgery, there was an option to get the fat tissue transfer instead of an imlant.. but guess what, she wasn't "fat" enough for the procedure to be done safely. You need a lot of stomach fat tissue, and it has to all be the extra jiggly kind that sits above the muscle. I think most of us on this board wouldn't be safely having this procedure anytime soon.. and by the time we gained enough weight, our boobs might be a lot bigger than they used to be anyways!

I agree with Aithinne, the more popular implants become, the less interesting large boobs become, and the more exotic & beautiful small, natural, unscarred breasts are.

I saw that documentary strongirl, it was pretty interesting. Body modification is amazing stuff, and people have been doing it for a long, long time, long before surgical techniques existed, and even when it endangered their health. It would be foolish to underestimate the importance of the body in the "body-mind" connection. It's just too bad how often the health & condition of the body gets ignored for the appearance of the body. It's also too bad to me, that girls pay money to make they bodies (in my opinion) uglier, because they don't feel pretty the way they are. It's so rare that plastic surgery actually looks good, but the cosmetic industry fools people into believing that money can buy beauty and hapiness and self-acceptance. Somehow, people become so ashamed of their own bodies that they are willing to try anything, spend any amount of money, risk any harm to their bodies to achieve the unattainable goals of beauty that they've allowed themselves to believe in. All to help a few surgeons buy yachts.
strongirl
Angie, I totally agree about women paying money to make their bodies uglier. When I was younger I fantasized some about getting implants and thought that if I ever had the money, it might be something I'd do. But the first time I used the Internet to look through bunches of implant before and after pics, I was shocked at how much better I liked the befores! It really turned my head around.

buttercups
Arg ladies I'm having such a bad week body-wise ( and everything-wise) and i cant get it together. I'm on such a low and everytime I think I'm doing ok I have some sort of breakdown. It could be because I'm feeling extra stressed with school and my mom called me a "slacker" today even though I have always gotten straight A's my entire life and have always worked really hard to do that. I think when I am stressed about other things I start to really hate my breasts- I take my whole life out on those poor tiny things. I guess we all have our ups and downs and I need to try to get back up before the week is out- its my bfs bday at the end of the week so i want to pull myself out of this bad mood. It doesn't help that I saw a movie today with many scenes of girls with gorgeous figures and of course none of them resembled mine..sorry to be such a downer promise ill be more up later.
Aithinne
Scapegoating your breasts is not a good idea buttercups. Sounds like perhaps you need to find some healthier ways of dealing with stress? Maybe go for a run or a brisk walk or something? I know that exercise is a big stress-reliever with all the feel-good hormones released when you do it. I use a distraction method, which is effective most of the time now for me. Although, sometimes it doesn't work, like with the 'cute' incident.

One way to relieve stress (which I do not recommend doing all the time or your wallet will feel the punch), is to go shopping. Like your bf, buttercups, my b-day is this week. I went shopping today after work to find some more nice pants for work, and also an outfit I felt hot and sexy (NOT CUTE!) in for going out on Friday for the b-day celebration. I found this shirt in black (which I got a black cami to go underneath, and this pair of pants to go with it), and I got to say, I think this shirt was made for small boobie women. It really hugs the curves you got and makes the small boobie body look very streamlined. It is pretty dang sexy if you ask me, but in a classy, not trampy way. But I will have to wear a strapless bra under my cami because the fabric of the shirt lays better and flatter if I do. The cami sucked everything in so that I looked like an AA, and man, it looked smokin hot. So, I will edit my thinking that only large-busted women look best in every article of clothing ever made. Because honestly, this shirt I think really would look best on a small-breasted woman. Go figure, eh?

Buttercups, I swear I actually thought of you while I was in the dressing room looking smaller than I am and thinking it looked hot that way! I wanted to tell you about the shirt because I know you've been having a hard time with your little boobies. I'm sorry you're having a bad day and week, but I'm glad you come here to talk and get support!

Two thumbs up to you and your teeny booblets! Everyone, *collective cheer*!!!!
buttercups
Awww thats great Aithinne! It's def true that some tops actually do look better on us smallies (Not to diss our bigger busted sisters bc there's plenty of tops that look really hot on you, just us smallies need to know we can look good too)! That outfit is so sexy and you must look sooooo hot and gorgeous in it!! What day is your bday? You're going to have such a great time and all eyes are gonna be on you in that lace top! I can't wait to hear about all the men youll have to fend off!

Thanks for making me feel better and for the stress-relieving tips. Going for a run is something I really should do next time.

You rock! <3 buttercups
Aithinne
Well, I think you should sit down and think of the things that make you really happy and take stress away, keep them in the back of your mind, and then utilize them when you start feeling bad about your body. For example, do you have pets? I think pets are probably the #1 stress reliever. Whenever I feel bad, I go out and pet my doggies and kitties and it never fails to make me happy. Got a hobby? Maybe if your hobby is something that requires a lot of concentration, you could work on that. Or maybe if you have artistic talent, you could draw something... Just think of things that you could do so you don't get stuck in the negative cycle. The more you practice, the easier it is to shut off the cycle and not give the negative train momentum.

My b-day is today, but we're going out tomorrow. I think there is something to be said for going out dressed in the classy version of sexy. So many chicks go out and let it all hang out- the skirts barely cover their ass, their shirts may as well be pasties for all the cleavage they cover, and all this in one outfit... Women dressed this way for a night on the town are a dime a dozen, so maybe I'll stand out by not giving everything away to the viewing public.

I've got a certain male in mind that I'm trying to grab the attention of, so we'll see how it goes. wink.gif I think my chances are good for tomorrow night.
karategrrl
strongirl, I hear ya on the Bettie Page thing. Now, SHE was freaking beautiful. And SEXY. I'll always love her. But by today's inflated standards, she is now considered "small." My ex had a collection of pinup art (some was art, some was trash). He had prints of Vargas paintings modeled after Bettie page (with boobs inflated) and a couple of actual autographed photos (one topless). Her breasts were fricking beautiful just the way God made 'em, not the Vargas way.

Long live Bettie Page (at least in our hearts).
strongirl
Well said, Karategrrl. I'm a Bettie Page fan, too. The camera loved her and she loved it right back.

Aithinne - that's some excellent advice on stress relief! My pets do it for me too. The other day my bf was having a stressful day and went to lie down on the bed then called one of our dogs, saying "Get up here, I need to pet you and lower my blood pressure!" smile.gif


Have a happy birthday, Aithinne! I meant to tell you I think your lace top is WAY HOT!!! You'll look fabulous! Have a great time! That male you mentioned woud be very lucky to have you flirt with him.






karategrrl
QUOTE(strongirl @ Sep 18 2009, 11:24 AM) *
Aithinne - that's some excellent advice on stress relief! My pets do it for me too.


Me too. My furbabies are like little pieces of Heaven.
Aithinne
Furbabies!!! How cuuuuuuuuuute!! Lol. I think I'll go out and pet my kitties now.

Birthday party was the most fun I've had on a birthday. Although, my throat is really raw now because drinking and being around people who smoke tends to do that to me. I'm pretty positive I can call the time with Mr. Yum a success. He sort of dragged me up to the front of the bar where the musicians were for a dance. And I'm fairly confident that I felt something a little stiff against my leg during the dance. wink.gif *Happy yay-ness!* I looked very un-cute in my getup, and it accomplished what it needed to accomplish. But unfortuantely, I didn't take any pics.. I wanted to share with the group the awesome small boobie sexiness! But, *sigh*, I forgot to grab my camera. We also crashed at his friend's place and I got to snuggle/sleep for a long time with him. *comfy*

Yay, I'm happy today. Don't quite have the hook set yet, but I think I'm well on my way...


Yippee, I'm a hardcore bustie now!
crinoline
I'm a little late replying here, I'm in a situation where I can't get on the compy alot.

Aithinne- I love the outfit! Open back tops were made for small busties, what a smokin' hot ensemble!!

I just got a dress (geez it's so short, almost a tunic) from forever21 that is top to bottom black fringe and looks best au natural, I got it for my brother's "speakeasy party" but it may double for halloween. I'm wavering between fishnets and thigh highs. I want to be sexy, not trashy, what do y'all think?

here's to looking "un-cute!"
karategrrl
I had to post this here. Being that October is Breast Cancer Awareness month (at least in the USA), this is timely.

breast cancer awareness ads

I don't agree that they're putting male sexism to "good use," but it's interesting how they are playing off of it. Bottom line is (and this is sad), men only care about breast cancer when the threat of it means fewer nice titties for their entertainment. Or at least that's what the ad industry thinks.

On this topic, I saw a cute shirt over the weekend: "Big or small, save them all!"
koffeewitch
Guys I gotta tell ya, I've had every cup size...I started out a C cup and then got huge gajumbo DDDs when I was first breastfeeding, then my kids sucked me down to an A cup, then I returned to large B/small C averageness AND I am totally envious of smaller busted women.
Reasons...
1. Small boobies look cute and perky sans bra; bigger boobies just sag (unless they are fake).
2. So many cute tops look great on smaller busted women and trashy on large busted women.
3. When I have my milk engorgement DD's going on, I get way too much attention from the jerkiest men in the entire universe. (Like calm down dumb asses, it's just MILK)
4. Smaller busted women age much better... and look better naked. (that sagging issue, again)
5. Models and actresses are usually smaller busted...that "cleavage" you see in the movies is painted on or created with tape.
TRUST ME, small perky boobs = sexy; do you really want tits that will hang to your belly button someday??
Aithinne
QUOTE(karategrrl @ Sep 22 2009, 09:03 AM) *
On this topic, I saw a cute shirt over the weekend: "Big or small, save them all!"

Lol! I want that shirt!! Faaaaabulous, dahling karategrrl!
buttercups
I don't know why but that whole breast cancer ad just made me angry. I understand that they're trying to spread awareness but once again its at the objectification of women. It sounds weird but I also feel really singled out when it comes to the whole breast health and breast cancer issue, as though it doesn't apply to me and because I'm female I want it to. I just never feel a part of the female species I guess bc I really don't possess any of the assets to qualify me as one. I know in my head I can get breast cancer, but when I look down I think "well, there's not really much there for cancer" even though I know thats not true. My GYN does this like 2 second "breast exam" on me thats basically just feeling my ribs..I guess its another part of being a woman that I feel I'm missing out on regardless of whether its something positive or negative. In any event that ad just puts big boobs back in my face and pretty much says guys will only care about boobs (and women for that matter) if they're "voluptuous" and hot enough to make their "jaws drop". I will never get that jaw-dropping reaction. Maybe from something I say, but def not from this tiny body. Does that mean my chest is useless and men won't care if it gets cancer? Karategrrl I agree with you, I think it is sad. As much as I'm all about breast cancer awareness I hope I don't run into one of these ads myself, its the last thing I need right now.
Persiflager
*delurks*

Thigh-highs, crinoline, thigh-highs thigh-highs thigh-highs!

*relurks*
treehugger
QUOTE(buttercups @ Sep 22 2009, 05:07 PM) *
I don't know why but that whole breast cancer ad just made me angry. I understand that they're trying to spread awareness but once again its at the objectification of women. It sounds weird but I also feel really singled out when it comes to the whole breast health and breast cancer issue, as though it doesn't apply to me and because I'm female I want it to. I just never feel a part of the female species I guess bc I really don't possess any of the assets to qualify me as one. I know in my head I can get breast cancer, but when I look down I think "well, there's not really much there for cancer" even though I know thats not true.


I hope this isn't a derail, but I personally know a man who got breast cancer.
karategrrl
QUOTE(treehugger @ Sep 23 2009, 08:22 AM) *
I hope this isn't a derail, but I personally know a man who got breast cancer.


Not a derail at all. Yes, this happens!! and when it does, the men who get it often have to deal with embarrassment on top of fighting for their lives b/c it's a "female" issue and somehow makes them "unmanly." Just more macho bullcrap.

buttercups, breast cancer is an equal-opportunity disease. Small-breasted women can get it just like larger-busted women. Often it can crop up along the ribcage, chest wall and armpits, so sounds like your doc is doing the right thing. (I work in health care marketing/education.) I can see how those ads are offensive, though, b/c I feel that way, too--like according to those ads, I won't get anyone's sexual interest OR concern for my health b/c I'm small. Stupid morons.
karategrrl
I found the breast cancer ad on youtube:

Save the Boobs

What's interesting is, the last shot (of the wet t-shirt) almost looks like a different girl with a smaller chest. I like that one better. wink.gif
buttercups
Yeah it does look like a different girl, but i think its supposed to be the same one? Idk I think if I were younger and uneducated about breast cancer and looking at that ad, I would think that breast cancer didn't apply to me because I don't have those big bouncing breasts. So what is it really saying? It could have been more effective by showing a bunch of different sized and aged women in bikinis or tank tops or whatever and then putting on the same saying "you know you like them". That ad just does not seem to send the right message to people who may be unaware of breast cancer and who it affects. Also, though breast cancer is very deadly in young women the main target age and the people who get breast cancer the most are older women- again it doesn't seem to give quite the right information. That ad is kind of just giving men another excuse to oogle women and stare at big boobs- and I'm sure a lot of big breasted gals would not appreciate another opportunity for everyone to stare unashamedly at their chest. Yes we want to save the boobs, but I think its important to stress that we're looking to save everyone here like you guys have pointed out, and that ad does not portray that.
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(karategrrl @ Sep 23 2009, 08:59 AM) *
I found the breast cancer ad on youtube:

Save the Boobs

What's interesting is, the last shot (of the wet t-shirt) almost looks like a different girl with a smaller chest. I like that one better. wink.gif



The commerical seems so contrived. And the guy lounging in the pool and the group of guys dressed as sailors look kind of umm...gay.
  • I like the black guy at 0:16 in the commercial "Dayum...I gotta get me some of that !"
  • The middle aged guy at 0:19 looks like he's wants to pop a Viagara
  • The blonde at 0:33 looks like she could be a regular in the Small Breast thread but she looks like she is not jealous but is in admiration
  • The dog at 0:38 must have been looking at a steak, the director did a great job of making the dog's amusement look genuine
koffeewitch
oops I realize now I jumped in with my poor attempt at humor (tho' very sincere opinion) in the middle of an extremely serious *discussion*. I guess that's what happens when you don't stop to lurk a moment before posting. But God, I get so angry when I see how we women are trained to look at each part of our bodies separately instead of seeing ourselves as whole. A woman doesn't ever think she is attractive...she evaluates her complexion, eyes, hair, nose, belly, breast, thighs, knees, calves, ankles, feet, height... Men do not look at their bodies this way, with this much hatred, with this much obsessive misery. And then when anyone of us GETS cancer, we realize the insanity of it. What wouldn't we give for a healthy body, no matter how "imperfectly" shaped... or even a youthful body once we begin to age. If you think society treats you as less than for being small chested, wait, oh wait, until you start to age... Life is so short, love what ya got. (and sorry for butting in like a complete ass yet again)...
strongirl
No worries, Koffeewitch, your points are valid and resonate with many of the posts that have been made in here over time. I thought your previous post about having had various breast sizes was interesting and I have often felt grateful for my 34A's for some of the reasons you listed. (I'm almost 48 with no stretchmarks and no sagging and still get positive male responses when I wear cute little tops with no bra.) Overall, I think the chicks in this thread (and the cross-pollinating large breast thread) try to support each other in seeing the pro's/con's of both worlds and at the same time embrace the attitude that all shapes/sizes etc can be beautiful and sexy, that sexy is mostly in your head. And that health should be more important than looks anyway. We also sometimes offend each other, confuse each other, and have to untangle the communication. So you're right in the mix and you are welcome to stick around and muddle through with the rest of us.

karategrrl
Allison-shine, thanks for the laughs! LOL!

-Yup, the middle-aged guy looks like he's reaching into his pocket for that Viagra, and he'll use Edith His Wife as a receptacle while he fantasizes
-The small-breasted blonde looks suddenly bi-curious
-You're right about the dog--I hadn't even noticed that until you pointed it out! He, of course, wants to hump her leg.
-Yes, sailors are gay for sure--not that there's anything wrong with that--and it looks like they're whooping it up more like, "yeah, girl, Go girl!"

koffeewitch, I enjoyed your comments too! Welcome aboard and join the kvetching!
angie_21
Save the boobs? Women die because of breast cancer. But no, let's save the fucking boobs. Jesus.
buttercups
Thats true Angie, very true.
strongirl
Angie - you absolutely nailed it. Thank you.

Karategrrl - ROFL over your comment about the dog! biggrin.gif
karategrrl
QUOTE(strongirl @ Sep 25 2009, 12:39 PM) *
Angie - you absolutely nailed it. Thank you.

Karategrrl - ROFL over your comment about the dog! biggrin.gif


Yes, Angie, right on!
strongirl: glad I made your day! Anytime.
This is a "lo-fi" version of our main content. To view the full version with more information, formatting and images, please click here.
Invision Power Board © 2001-2014 Invision Power Services, Inc.