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skindeep1991
QUOTE(DeeRayy @ Jul 7 2011, 06:05 PM) *
hmmm well karategrrl's suggestion makes sense. you could post a pic on that 007 site. i honestly don't think i'm at the point where i could post a pic of my boobs, but that's just me. but if you want to i shall totally cheer you on smile.gif


Lol I got as far as taking the pictures and then I felt like poo and decided against it, nevermind ey. I tried xD maybe at a later date.

I had a bad night last night, I started talking to my boyfriend about all the girls he used to be with and how they all had breasts and I made myself feel bad. He was very supportive though and kept re-assuring me and telling me that he loved me the way I am. I just sometimes have issues with my partners ex girlfriends =/ is it just me?
DeeRayy
QUOTE(skindeep1991 @ Jul 7 2011, 11:00 AM) *
I had a bad night last night, I started talking to my boyfriend about all the girls he used to be with and how they all had breasts and I made myself feel bad. He was very supportive though and kept re-assuring me and telling me that he loved me the way I am. I just sometimes have issues with my partners ex girlfriends =/ is it just me?


aww skindeep you shouldn't be trying to compare yourself to the other girls your boyfriend has been with. this may sound cliche, but they're his EX girlfriends for a reason. he said that he loves you the way you are. it's best not to bring those kinds of things up because believe me, you will end up driving yourself crazy for no good reason.

let's put it this way- have you been with other guys in the past? and do their bodies make you appreciate your boyfriend's body any less?

if i seem to be responding fast, it's because i'm in bed with strep throat. eeek, strep throat is from the devil, the devil i say!
skindeep1991
QUOTE(DeeRayy @ Jul 7 2011, 07:51 PM) *
aww skindeep you shouldn't be trying to compare yourself to the other girls your boyfriend has been with. this may sound cliche, but they're his EX girlfriends for a reason. he said that he loves you the way you are. it's best not to bring those kinds of things up because believe me, you will end up driving yourself crazy for no good reason.

let's put it this way- have you been with other guys in the past? and do their bodies make you appreciate your boyfriend's body any less?

if i seem to be responding fast, it's because i'm in bed with strep throat. eeek, strep throat is from the devil, the devil i say!


I know i shouldn't talk about it but it really plays on my mind. I know its silly. Like when he says he finds an actress attractive i always point out her breast size and just make myself feel inferior, its gotten to the point where i avoid even mentioning if someone is attractive on tv to avoid him mentioning who he finds attractive. I get easily intimidated and sometimes i think it puts stress on my relationship.

Oh noes not strep throat i'll kill it for you. Hope you feel better soon biggrin.gif


DeeRayy
QUOTE(skindeep1991 @ Jul 7 2011, 03:40 PM) *
I know i shouldn't talk about it but it really plays on my mind. I know its silly. Like when he says he finds an actress attractive i always point out her breast size and just make myself feel inferior, its gotten to the point where i avoid even mentioning if someone is attractive on tv to avoid him mentioning who he finds attractive. I get easily intimidated and sometimes i think it puts stress on my relationship.


hmmm well i've definitely been in your shoes. yes, insecurity definitely puts stress on a relationship. i shall quote the ever awesome strongirl with a line from one of her posts that really stuck with me for some reason- "don't let your insecurity be bigger than the attraction between you two."

you stated yourself that you find guys on tv attractive. and i'm guessing that a lot of those guys on tv that you find attractive have a more "ideal" body than your boyfriend (although you can correct me if i'm wrong). that doesn't make them better than you're ex, but of course you already knew that. similarly, you are in no way "inferior" to some actress on tv just because her breasts are bigger than yours. i think you just need to learn not to place so much value and emphasis on that ONE part of your body. you shouldn't let your boobs define you, believe me i've done it and it just made me miserable. i'm gonna get all therapist on you and suggest you spend time looking at the parts of your body that you do like right now, because they deserve just as much attention as the parts of your body that you don't like. i could spend all day expressing my feelings on this, but i'll leave it at that

another thing that irks me is that your sense of self seems to be too dependent on his approval. hun, he's already told you that he is satisfied with you, what's it gonna take from him to make you feel better? of course, if you're on this thread you already know that there is nothing our partner can do to fix our own insecurities. but anyway, i just think you're too worried about pleasing him and not worried enough about yourself. this reminds me of an article i once read on the beauty myth. i'll spare you the entire article because it's rather lengthy and focuses on the writer's obsession with her butt and thighs. but this excerpt is very interesting.

"Why are we so obsessed with our appearance in the first place?

Some, like Naomi Wolf, put the blame squarely on Madison Avenue, and it is true that Big Business profits from your self-hate. If they can convince you that you are a ugly, you just might be willing to buy their diet book, mouthwash, shoes, designer jeans, or plastic surgery...

But that's not the whole story. I think one underlying cause for the "beauty myth" is that we women still see ourselves mostly in relation to men. We are raised to believe that if we find Prince Charming, life will be wonderful. No more pain, no more loneliness. We will be complete. And the major way we win Mr.Wonderful's heart is by being beautiful. In the fairy tale, the heroine was always the "fairest in the land". For women, beauty is power.

So, we diet, Botox our wrinkles, and shrink ourselves into the uncomfortable shoe to have the "fairy tale" love. At least, I used to believe that way. So, I kept primping and waiting for Romeo. Well, he hasn't shown up yet. And as I grew older, I realized that even if I were to meet him, my life wouldn't be perfect. When I finally got this through my head, my obsession with finding Prince Charming faded somewhat, and my fixation on my appearance followed.

If we ever get to the point where the majority of women have an autonomous identity that is not dependent on some man's approval, (and this is going to take both equal pay and equal power) Botox wouldn't hold such allure. In fact, it might go belly up, and our "moments" could be moments of celebration not denigration. We would finally realize that love does not conquer all -- certainly not self-hatred. And we don't need to be completed.

We are complete."
DeeRayy
btw, i've been doing a lot of boredom induced internet surfing since i'm stuck in bed recovering, and i found theee best youtube channel ever! here are a couple of videos that pertain to this thread. it's a a sex positive blog run by a sexologist and feminist activist, and they do their best to empower women.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGa58YXJNBg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ng9b0UsZXcc
(this one's mainly about penis size insecurity but they do a good job in pointing out how porn is a caricature of sex)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=feRssvAqRwc
KeraBear
QUOTE(skindeep1991 @ Jul 7 2011, 06:30 AM) *
We should have a day where we just make each other feel better about things we don't like about ourselves. doesn't have to be breasts can be anything but I think it would be a feel good day, and possibly a little freeing...

let me know your thoughts?


Hmm... interesting thought. I dunno though... in a recent PM exchange with DeeRayy we both challenged ourselves to name five things that we liked about ourselves physically (and yes, it WAS challenging! I had to stop and think for five minutes or so when I got to number five). We both agreed that it was a positive experience. We also agreed that it wouldn't be nearly as challenging to throw out a quick list of five things that we don't like about ourselves. Ultimately we decided that doing that would be more negative than positive - mostly because it would cause us to dwell even more on such things. Maybe a day where we talk about things we like about ourselves would be a better idea. smile.gif

Yes, there is certainly some power in positive affirmation from others, but we cannot rely on it. I was reading something on the Stop Hating Your Body site the other day that really struck me as true. It said that self confidence comes from the inside-out not the outside-in. I liked that a lot. smile.gif
KeraBear
Oh yeah, and i just counted. NINE posts today from the under-20 crowd. Ha ha. Teens rule the small boobie site yet again!!

EDIT: Actually, no, I am updating this to TEN. I am giving Karategrrl honorary teen status because she is so awesomesauce! smile.gif
karategrrl
QUOTE(KeraBear @ Jul 8 2011, 02:12 AM) *
I am giving Karategrrl honorary teen status because she is so awesomesauce! smile.gif

Awesomesauce!!!!??? laugh.gif Okay, you totally made my fucking day!! Thank you and YIPPEEEE! I admit I'm going through a tad bit of insecurity--I'm lookingin the mirror and seeing lots of "face-aging" shit I don't like. I've noticed the neck doing weird wrinkly things in the last couple of years, then the face doing strange jowl-like shit. Last night I noticed this little strange outer eyelid sag thing and I was like, "WTF?" From the neck down, though, I'm pretty happy with myself and I say, shit, I don't look bad for 42, but in the back of my mind is this fear that I can't "keep up appearances" for that long. Forget the tits, lately I'm shocked at my face. Never mind that I seem to have gone into hair-production overdrive on my upper lip and chin. Seriously, WTF? I ordered a facial epilator yesterday.

Then again, I got in to work today to have one of the security guards tell me that he saw another guy--this middle-aged dude--practically fall down and do convulsions at the sight of me yesterday (I think that was how he said it, ha), which I find kind of amusing. Part of me doubts it, and says, "Big deal, guys get off at the sight of any woman who's not elderly or morbidly obese," and the other part of me says, "Heh, jowls or not, I still got it." So Kera, your comment is compliment #2 this morning. Thank you for the lift!!!!!! Needed it!!!!!


Skindeep:
You're not the only one who's got "ex" complexes. That's one of my challenges, too. I generally don't do too well with the whole "ex" thing, but I'm getting better. DeeRayy's post on this was TOTALLY on the mark--yes, they are EXes for a reason! Recnetly my hubby got back in touch with an ex of his (fuckin' Facebook) and it was actually kinda funny to see that this girl he'd talked about and I'd worked up in my head as being this hot knockout is, like, not to be mean, but I'll just say she's no threat. At all. So yes, DeeRayy's right--our own worst enemies are in our own heads!

Which brings me to Kera's mention of her and DR's "positivity" thread. Way to go, grrls!!!!!!!!! Good shit. Thinking more positively has seriously changed my life. And I guess if I wasn't thinking good thoughts, I'd be totally down in the dumps about my face, instead of like, "Huh?" wink.gif


I'll leave you FANTASTIC ladies with this request:
I'm getting my annual mammogram later today--you know, that thing you have to do when you turn into an old fuck, ha. One of my best friends is a mamm tech and she does my exams, and it's a fucking riot. So please send my sweet 42-year-old booblets some special lovin' as they get squished. (Haha, they look much bigger in the x-ray--all smooshed.)


You ladies rock mightily.
skindeep1991
QUOTE(karategrrl @ Jul 8 2011, 02:00 PM) *
Awesomesauce!!!!??? laugh.gif Okay, you totally made my fucking day!! Thank you and YIPPEEEE! I admit I'm going through a tad bit of insecurity--I'm lookingin the mirror and seeing lots of "face-aging" shit I don't like. I've noticed the neck doing weird wrinkly things in the last couple of years, then the face doing strange jowl-like shit. Last night I noticed this little strange outer eyelid sag thing and I was like, "WTF?" From the neck down, though, I'm pretty happy with myself and I say, shit, I don't look bad for 42, but in the back of my mind is this fear that I can't "keep up appearances" for that long. Forget the tits, lately I'm shocked at my face. Never mind that I seem to have gone into hair-production overdrive on my upper lip and chin. Seriously, WTF? I ordered a facial epilator yesterday.

Then again, I got in to work today to have one of the security guards tell me that he saw another guy--this middle-aged dude--practically fall down and do convulsions at the sight of me yesterday (I think that was how he said it, ha), which I find kind of amusing. Part of me doubts it, and says, "Big deal, guys get off at the sight of any woman who's not elderly or morbidly obese," and the other part of me says, "Heh, jowls or not, I still got it." So Kera, your comment is compliment #2 this morning. Thank you for the lift!!!!!! Needed it!!!!!
Skindeep:
You're not the only one who's got "ex" complexes. That's one of my challenges, too. I generally don't do too well with the whole "ex" thing, but I'm getting better. DeeRayy's post on this was TOTALLY on the mark--yes, they are EXes for a reason! Recnetly my hubby got back in touch with an ex of his (fuckin' Facebook) and it was actually kinda funny to see that this girl he'd talked about and I'd worked up in my head as being this hot knockout is, like, not to be mean, but I'll just say she's no threat. At all. So yes, DeeRayy's right--our own worst enemies are in our own heads!

Which brings me to Kera's mention of her and DR's "positivity" thread. Way to go, grrls!!!!!!!!! Good shit. Thinking more positively has seriously changed my life. And I guess if I wasn't thinking good thoughts, I'd be totally down in the dumps about my face, instead of like, "Huh?" wink.gif


I'll leave you FANTASTIC ladies with this request:
I'm getting my annual mammogram later today--you know, that thing you have to do when you turn into an old fuck, ha. One of my best friends is a mamm tech and she does my exams, and it's a fucking riot. So please send my sweet 42-year-old booblets some special lovin' as they get squished. (Haha, they look much bigger in the x-ray--all smooshed.)
You ladies rock mightily.


Personally I think a woman with a couple of wrinkles here and there is a hell lot more attractive than bot-ox faced women. There's nothing sexier than aging gracefully apposed to pumping yourself with chemicals cause no one wants to end up with the Jacky Stallone look that's not a good look to be wearing out.
That's the perk of having small breasticles, always perky =D. After all men are doing convulsions at the sight of you so I'm sure you look amazing.

Thing is I don't feel too intimidated by his less attractive ex's like you said, but it's the really attractive ones that really get to me. I hate the thought of it and It upsets me.
He's in trouble with me today anyway for the utter lack of respect he's showed me earlier, it's a long story but basically left me feeling used. so not a good feeling at the moment.

I hope your booblets will be okays after being smushed D= I will send lots of love your way <3

Also being quite a dark girl I have a little mustache already and i'm only 19 so by the time I get to 50 odd i'm going to have a full on beard haha
DeeRayy
QUOTE(karategrrl @ Jul 8 2011, 06:00 AM) *
Awesomesauce!!!!??? laugh.gif Okay, you totally made my fucking day!! Thank you and YIPPEEEE! I admit I'm going through a tad bit of insecurity--I'm lookingin the mirror and seeing lots of "face-aging" shit I don't like. I've noticed the neck doing weird wrinkly things in the last couple of years, then the face doing strange jowl-like shit. Last night I noticed this little strange outer eyelid sag thing and I was like, "WTF?" From the neck down, though, I'm pretty happy with myself and I say, shit, I don't look bad for 42, but in the back of my mind is this fear that I can't "keep up appearances" for that long. Forget the tits, lately I'm shocked at my face. Never mind that I seem to have gone into hair-production overdrive on my upper lip and chin. Seriously, WTF? I ordered a facial epilator yesterday.


hmmmm i'm going to bet that the only one noticing these things is you karategrrl. it's like we said, we're our own worst enemies sometimes! we tend to blow up our "flaws" when we look in the mirror until that's all we can see. i finally managed to lose the weight i gained from the thyroid problems i was having this spring, and i feel like myself again. but boy did i beat myself up over those extra pounds while they were still on me! it didn't matter that it was a medical condition that caused them, i still managed to get mad at myself for it. so i think you also need to give yourself a break missy. oh and on the mini mustache thing- i , like skindeep, am pretty dark and already have to wax my upper lip. it's really no big deal.

don't fret karategrrl, you're still a hottie! and 42 isn't even old! my mother is only a couple years younger than you and she still gets carded when she buys alcohol.

QUOTE
I'll leave you FANTASTIC ladies with this request:
I'm getting my annual mammogram later today--you know, that thing you have to do when you turn into an old fuck, ha. One of my best friends is a mamm tech and she does my exams, and it's a fucking riot. So please send my sweet 42-year-old booblets some special lovin' as they get squished. (Haha, they look much bigger in the x-ray--all smooshed.)
You ladies rock mightily.


haha, what's the difference between a mammogram and a regular breast exam? my doctor sprung my first breast exam on me last year and it was mighty awkward. she just started feeling me up out of nowhere! and i was like "whoa whoa! what's going on here doc??". haha, so i wish your boobies well as they get all smooshed and squished (can anyone say sexy party?)
skindeep1991
QUOTE(DeeRayy @ Jul 8 2011, 07:40 PM) *
(can anyone say sexy party?)


SEXY PARTY!!!!

I'll bring my mustache =D
KeraBear
QUOTE(DeeRayy @ Jul 8 2011, 02:40 PM) *
haha, what's the difference between a mammogram and a regular breast exam? my doctor sprung my first breast exam on me last year and it was mighty awkward. she just started feeling me up out of nowhere! and i was like "whoa whoa! what's going on here doc??".


Hey! You'd think she would at least buy you dinner before she tried going to second base?! wink.gif Ha ha... she didn't at least warn you first? Too funny. LOL

QUOTE(DeeRayy @ Jul 8 2011, 02:40 PM) *
don't fret karategrrl, you're still a hottie!


I second this!

QUOTE(skindeep1991 @ Jul 8 2011, 04:36 PM) *
SEXY PARTY!!!!

I'll bring my mustache =D


Whoa... the ladies in the small booby group getting freeeeeeakkkkaaayy!!! On second thought, maybe we shouldn't be advertising this! We've already had a hard enough time in the past keeping the creepers out!
DeeRayy
hey guys. i've been keeping my posts positive lately, but it seems i'm having a relapse of sorts. i'm in a phase right now where i'm just upset with my body. literally mad at it. you see, it's never really been the size of my boobs alone that have bothered me, but it's the size of my boobs in proportion to the rest of my body. i'm actually at a lower weight right now than i was in high school, but i'm still what you would call "thick" [size 8]. and it's really frustrating because the issues that i'm having with my thyroid are making it extremely difficult to lose weight. my mom just tells me to hang in there and keep at it, but really she has no idea how difficult it is to lose weight with an under active thyroid when your doctor doesn't want to start medication yet. i just feel so out of proportion and misshapen. i don't see a woman's body when i look in the mirror, i just see this shapeless form. i know i should try to take pride in my strong points, but lately i really don't see any. all i see is my pudgy stomach, my lack of hips, my small boobs, my whatever butt. i'm trying to see something, anything that i can take pride in but i can't seem to find anything. i feel so abnormal because most women with small breasts are either very thin or are pear shaped so they at least have a small waist and full hips. i'm not like that- i carry all my weight in my stomach and thighs, and it makes me feel so...i don't want to say deformed but, just odd looking. and i get angry at my body- for not developing breasts, for not having a working thyroid, for just looking like it does. i sometimes feel like my body is my own worst enemy sometimes because it causes me so much grief. i don't expect you guys to relate to what i'm going through with my body, i'm just expressing my frustrations because i get so tired of feeling like this, and i haven't felt this bad in a while.
buttercups
Hey guys, sorry I've been so in-and-out lately, but going crazy getting things ready for a new job, moving in with the bf, trying to pass the biggest test of my life- gah just everything!

Anyways, DeeRayy, *bigggggggggg hug* I can totally relate to how you're feeling- misshapen- but you are being way way WAYYY too hard on yourself. My goodness hunny you have a thyroid condition, you're already not feeling so great as it is, so please do me and you a favor and give yourself a friggin break! I'm not going to try to get you to point out all of your strong points right now (of which there are numerous I know) because I know exactly the kind of mood you are in and I know that sometimes it's just too hard to see them during this time, but what I do what you to do is stop being so hard on yourself and your body during this difficult time and try to be more understanding of yourself. If I had a thyroid condition would you ever say such things to me?? So many women are a size 8 and have small breasts- heck so many women wear a size much higher than an 8 and have small breasts. I for one am envious of women who are a healthier size with small breasts because I think it looks way more womanly than my tiny child-like frame. Small breasts on me looks like I haven't been through puberty for chrissake- so know that there is someone out here who is envious of your shape! Don't put all this pressure on yourself, it is only going to make you feel worse and worse. We all get angry with our bodies, I'm in a battle with mine everyday, but sometimes we just have to let go of all of this horrible pressure we put on ourselves to be a certain way. Thyroid or not, 5 extra pounds or 200 extra pounds, you are incredibly beautiful inside and out- and you will see that once everything else including your medical condition gets straightened out a little. For now, please take this nurse's orders and curl up with a nice book or some trashy tv (more my style), make some tea or light some soothing candles and RELAX. xoxox
anarch
Curious what you gals think of this:

Victoria's Secret Leopard-Print Wrap Monokini

Sure looks to me like it's designed for smallies. It's actually a one-piece. See the back view. I'm tempted (though animal prints are actually too Look At Me! Look At Me! for my taste), but what the hell keeps it in place? If you lift your arms, will it lift up and show nipples? Maybe it's one of those things that's designed for beach lounging and not actually doing anything active...
anarch
hell, I meant to say something supportive too: I hope we can meet in person one day, all of us, because you're all so thoughtful and caring and I *know* each of you is beautiful in interesting (not boring, conventional) ways. It would be so cool to be able to tell each other all these supportive things in person. We'd point out the beauty in each other. And we'd have great belly-laughs together!
karategrrl
You ladies are too freaking funny about the boob par-tay, especially Skindeep's bringing her mustache. LOL!!!!!!!


DeeRayy:
I’m really sorry you’re feeling down about the bod right now. I wish I had something magical to say that would totally change everything for you, but alas, I don't, except maybe to be kind and gentle with yourself. Do whatever it takes to feel better, in ways both big and small. And maybe stay away from the mirror a bit too right now? wink.gif

"what's the difference between a mammogram and a regular breast exam?"

A "regular" exam is the dr. feeling your breasts manually. We should all be doing breast self-exams monthly, preferably in the shower, with soapy/slippery hands. I am guilty of not doing this enough; here are instructions. At your appointment with your doctor, he or she will also manually check your booblets.

A mammogram is an x-ray of the breast tissue, where they put your boobies between two flat plastic panels and take 2 images: one straight down, one from the side.

All 3 types of exams are important:
1. Self-exams help you to become familiar with the way your breasts feel and are your 1st line of defense against anything wrong; if you notice anything unusual, you bring it to your doctor.
2. Doctor manual exams are for a professional opinion; while YOU are the authority on how your own breasts feel, THEY are the authority on how they feel compared to the hundreds of others they feel. Every breast has little bumps, etc. but doctors are well-versed in how abnormalities/tumors feel, and may direct you to further testing if they have any concerns.
3. Mammograms can detect abnormalities too small for human touch.

Forgive me—I work in health care marketing and education! rolleyes.giflaugh.gif I am passioante about self-care and health.
DeeRayy
thank you so much buttercups for the response. it helps to hear from someone else who knows what it's like to struggle on such a deep level. i'm just really looking forward to moving out in september so that i can have some time on my own. i tried to talk to my mother last night about how i was feeling and she just went off on me, saying how i need to stop it already and how i'm so over dramatic ( "you act like you're a monster or something!" is the way she put it). that definitely made me feel kind of guilty but i understand why she gets so frustrated with me. the only thing i really get upset about with her is that she keeps pushing the idea of implants on me. she makes me question my own reasons for not wanting them. i feel enough pressure to get the surgery as it is, i don't need any more from her.

it's definitely frustrating because as a woman i always feel sooooo much pressure to look and be a certain way, and it really gets to me since so much value is put on a woman's appearance. i admit i do care too much about what other people think and that affects my well being. it's like i have this immense fear of being judged, or not measuring up to everyone's expectations of me. i've always been like that. i remember the first time i got a B on an assignment in grade school i damn near had a nervous breakdown because i was no longer a straight A student. i guess i just put too much pressure on myself to be perfect, and since my body (especially my boobs) is something that i can't control i get particularly upset with it.
Allison-Shine
QUOTE(DeeRayy @ Jul 12 2011, 02:29 PM) *
thank you so much buttercups for the response. it helps to hear from someone else who knows what it's like to struggle on such a deep level. i'm just really looking forward to moving out in september so that i can have some time on my own. i tried to talk to my mother last night about how i was feeling and she just went off on me, saying how i need to stop it already and how i'm so over dramatic ( "you act like you're a monster or something!" is the way she put it). that definitely made me feel kind of guilty but i understand why she gets so frustrated with me. the only thing i really get upset about with her is that she keeps pushing the idea of implants on me. she makes me question my own reasons for not wanting them. i feel enough pressure to get the surgery as it is, i don't need any more from her.

it's definitely frustrating because as a woman i always feel sooooo much pressure to look and be a certain way, and it really gets to me since so much value is put on a woman's appearance. i admit i do care too much about what other people think and that affects my well being. it's like i have this immense fear of being judged, or not measuring up to everyone's expectations of me. i've always been like that. i remember the first time i got a B on an assignment in grade school i damn near had a nervous breakdown because i was no longer a straight A student. i guess i just put too much pressure on myself to be perfect, and since my body (especially my boobs) is something that i can't control i get particularly upset with it.


I left home at 18 for college and despite that I had to work along with going to school to cover living expenses, it was worth every penny to get that "time on my own". Money well spent ! Note: I got along great with my family but really needed my space for very personal reasons that are sometimes hard to explain.

Regarding breast implants, I can expect comments from certain men (and women) but not from one's own mother. For God's sake, now we have to hear it from our own mothers regarding body issues and appearance. Thankfully my Mom was not like that, even when seeing me next to my taller, more voluptuous D-cupped 18 year old sister, that idea would never come out of her mouth. The good person that you are and your accomplishments should outweigh the issues you have (and your reactions to them) in the eyes of others if I am making a shred of sense.

I thought with the way lots of kids are turning out these days any parent would be proud of their hard-working, productive child of any age and not refer to them as a "monster".

Actually I am a total peace with myself being a B-student in high school and college smile.gif And getting to be at better peace with being a barely B-cup. Maybe B is my destiny, lmao. I know, some in here probably think I have big hooters comparitvely speaking. Then by all means do tell me that, my ego can use some stroking now and then. wink.gif
DeeRayy
QUOTE(Allison-Shine @ Jul 12 2011, 12:16 PM) *
I thought with the way lots of kids are turning out these days any parent would be proud of their hard-working, productive child of any age and not refer to them as a "monster".


just to clarify, she wasn't actually referring to me as a "monster", she was saying that I myself act like I look so horrible with the way I get so upset and depressed about my appearance. thus the whole "you act like you're a monster" comment, meaning she thinks I exaggerate my flaws.

and i think she only mentions the implants out of frustration because she hates to see me upset and crying and she thinks that it would end all of these issues i'm having. like i've mentioned earlier, my family is not very anti-plastic. they don't see anything wrong with plastic surgery of any kind. they go by that "if you don't like something, change it" motto, which is fine for them. but it doesn't align with the way i see things.
karategrrl
I had to share something weird with you all.

Yesterday, I had THREE comments about my appearance from strangers or people I hardly know:

1. In my office cafeteria: One of the female workers there was complimenting me non-stop: "I love your skirt!" "Have you lost weght? You look fantastic"

2. Not even 5 minutes later: 2 male strangers in the hallway, checking me out. One said to the other: "She's too skinny."

3. Early evening, at the gym: male acquaintance said I "was" at my best 2 months ago: "You were lean and shredded then," i.e., I'm not now.


Just goes to show you cannot go too much by what either people think of your appearance, or you will drive yourself nuts.
strongirl
Hey lovely small busties, I've been computer-less for a spell, thus the non-posting. Wow, lots of good stuff to catch up on!

Gotta get to work but a couple of quick comments.

DeeRayy, I was so glad that something I said - the comment about not letting your insecurities become bigger than the attraction between you - resonated and made a positive difference for you. That made me feel really good and I am so glad it's helped. smile.gif

On the thyroid - I also am hypothyroid, diagnosed several years ago, and managed to royally f. up my medication earlier this year, which had a hugely negative impact on my health. I'm just now coming out of it. I know quite well what it's like to feel let down or betrayed by my body. But I try to flip that around - that my body is telling me what it needs and it's up to me to listen. Let me also point out that thyroid affects all hormones, and hormones affect emotions and mood. When your thyroid is off, your perceptions and reactions to things are altered, and not in a good way. For myself, I try to be aware of and respect my feelings all the time but not necessarily act on them - or even believe them! - when I know I'm under the influence of hormonal imbalance, thyroid, menopausal, or otherwise.

Karategrrl, re. the 3 different people's reactions in a single day - what a great example of how crazy it can make us when we buy into other people's assessments of our appearance. When it comes to people's preferences, the only absolute is variation. The good news about that is that everybody looks good to somebody! The bad news is there really is no such thing as "perfection" when it comes to appearance, so we can never say "Yes! Now I'm perfect! I'm satisfied!". Which leads me to...

DeeRayy, your "straight A" perfectionism makes me wonder if there's a commonality in many of us who post here - we're not just small-breasted, we're small-breasted, intelligent, and perfectionistic. And it's that combination that makes us tend to be unhappy about our breasts, or at least question the role they play in our lives and in society. If we were less perfectionistic, maybe we wouldn't get so hung up on all this. I think I was in my mid-twenties when I had the realization "Perfectionism can be a mental health problem". Since then, I try not to let myself get too far down the path of torturing myself when things aren't perfect. I try to tell myself "You'll never be perfect...so just settle for fabulous!" smile.gif

Ha, so much for "quick comments".
buttercups
Wow strongirl, I think you really summed it up with this:

"we're not just small-breasted, we're small-breasted, intelligent, and perfectionistic. And it's that combination that makes us tend to be unhappy about our breasts, or at least question the role they play in our lives and in society. If we were less perfectionistic, maybe we wouldn't get so hung up on all this. I think I was in my mid-twenties when I had the realization "Perfectionism can be a mental health problem"'

DeeRayy I am exactly the same, and strongirl totally hit the nail on the head (or the breast) with this one! I am completely a perfectionist about grades, just about everything. It took me awhile to realize how much damn pressure I put on myself all the time. I put so much pressure on myself to always get straight A's, then once you do, you have to keep putting the pressure on so you can maintain that- which can be just impossible to keep up. I put the same pressure on my body to be perfect too, like it sounds like many of us here do. I work out like crazy, never skip a day, don't let myself eat this and that, and if I do- well then I tear myself up over it completely. It is 100% a mental health problem, and we do have to realize that, like strongirl pointed out again, we are never going to be perfect, but in someone's eyes we will look good. Time for both of us to lay off the pressure, or rather all of us in here!

Karategrrl- that is crazy! My first thought was (after reading the one that was a compliment) that god people can be so rude!! I don't point out anyone's physical appearance unless to give them an honest and sincere compliment. I would NEVER say to someone " oh you were at your best months ago" - implying that you're not now- that is so rude!! It made me angry for you, but at the same time I do really appreciate your point that in the same day not only did people tell you that you look fantastic (which you do!) but also that you were too this or not enough that. It does just go to show that we shouldn't put so much weight on the things that people say, and we can't please everyone. Thanks for sharing that though, it does put things into perspective for me alot.
karategrrl
QUOTE(strongirl @ Jul 13 2011, 01:59 PM) *
When it comes to people's preferences, the only absolute is variation.

Amen!!!!

QUOTE(strongirl @ Jul 13 2011, 01:59 PM) *
"You'll never be perfect...so just settle for fabulous!" smile.gif

Love it! Works for me!
KeraBear
QUOTE(strongirl @ Jul 13 2011, 09:59 AM) *
I try to tell myself "You'll never be perfect...so just settle for fabulous!" smile.gif


Yes, I love this too!!!!! smile.gif

Oh so much good stuff on here lately, ladies!!! I'm just soaking it up!

Strongirl - interesting thoughs on small breastedness and perfectionism... you just might be onto something there.

Dee - it's a shame that your mom just can't seem to emphathize with you on this. Without walking around in our shoes (bra?) for a day, some people just will never understand. But you know what? Maybe you should see her comments about implants - no matter how off base they are - as a sign of caring. Perhaps she just wants to see you stop hurting.

And yeah, karategrrl, perfect illustration with your three comments in one day. It just goes to show just how subjective "beauty" truly is. And it goes to show how we can't always depend on others to define us. Fo sho!
karategrrl
QUOTE(Anne_Ecdote @ Jul 15 2011, 01:47 AM) *

Wow, even with our plastic surgery-crazy societies of today, I think I'm happier living now than I would have been then! I like the admiration for little ones, but it sounds a little condescending to the bigguns. this just made me laugh: "Breasts that hang flagging out of all comely shape and form..."
strongirl
OMG, what a fascinating post, Anne_Ecdote! I knew some of it but there was much that was new to me and the presentation was supremely amusing, as were the comments below. Thanks for sharing!

I recall from Art History class that fully exposed breasts were the fashion and that a woman's breasts were considered part of her face. The portraits I've seen from that time were all of young, small-breasted women (with good posture!).

I like stuff like this because it demonstrates how subjective and changeable it all is.

And I was a bit taken aback by one of the comments that said something like "I've heard that in the 1960's and 1970's, it was the fashion to go braless and I wish that was still an option." Jeesus peesus, I'm old! LOL

karategrrl
QUOTE(strongirl @ Jul 15 2011, 03:11 PM) *
And I was a bit taken aback by one of the comments that said something like "I've heard that in the 1960's and 1970's, it was the fashion to go braless and I wish that was still an option." Jeesus peesus, I'm old! LOL

Then I'm a dinosaur too, b/c I remember that also!!! Actually, I remember my 1st BF in 7th grade saying he wanted me to go braless. That was when I was fully realizing that I was out-boobed by all of my school counterparts, and HELL NO I was not going to do that. Today I do, occasionally.

Actually, I was thinking about all of you ladies over the weekend. I was doing quite a bit of yard and pool work at my house and opted to just wear a bikini to stay cooler and get some color. Yesterday I got annoyed with the bikini top and yanked it off and felt quite natural walking around our (secluded) backyard, working with just bikini bottoms, sneaks and work gloves. I felt like when I was a kid and would just run around carefree without a top. It was quite fun!
KeraBear
QUOTE(karategrrl @ Jul 18 2011, 07:54 AM) *
Then I'm a dinosaur too, b/c I remember that also!!! Actually, I remember my 1st BF in 7th grade saying he wanted me to go braless. That was when I was fully realizing that I was out-boobed by all of my school counterparts, and HELL NO I was not going to do that. Today I do, occasionally.

Actually, I was thinking about all of you ladies over the weekend. I was doing quite a bit of yard and pool work at my house and opted to just wear a bikini to stay cooler and get some color. Yesterday I got annoyed with the bikini top and yanked it off and felt quite natural walking around our (secluded) backyard, working with just bikini bottoms, sneaks and work gloves. I felt like when I was a kid and would just run around carefree without a top. It was quite fun!


Oh nooooo, going sans bra was unthinkable for me too. ESSPECIALLY in jr high much for the same reasons you mentioned. My ex loved it when i went braless though. wink.gif But i would never do it in public places.

And yay for you! Strongirl would be proud of your boobies' liberation! smile.gif
strongirl
How timely that I came across this article today:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/hallie-seega...s_b_901832.html

The comments are not to be missed. Many many posts from men saying how much they love small breasts or how breast size doesn't matter, it's the whole woman who matters. Many posts from smallies who go braless as their norm and love it. Many posts from big-breasted women who wish they could braless but it's either painful or just not a good look on them.

I loved reading about your top-free yard work, Karategrrl! That's so awesome! smile.gif

DeeRayy
hey guys

great article, strongirl. i noticed while reading it that she mentioned how her boobs had more point to them without a bra. which brings me to my question. i recently read this article by a girl with tuberous breasts.

http://stophatingyourbody.tumblr.com/post/...n-to-shyb-and-i

i'm starting to worry that since i'm naturally pointy that i have a mild form of tuberous breasts. my frame is smaller than hers but as much as i hate to admit it, my breasts look similar to hers from those angles- widely spaced and pointy. do you guys know of this condition? is there a difference between tuberous breasts and pointy breasts, or are the terms interchangeable? it's bothering me so much that i'm going to ask my doctor to look at my breasts the next time i see her.

i don't know how much longer i can take feeling liike this. i've become sooo distraught with the shape and size of my breasts that it's affecting me constantly. i just don't feel normal. i wouldn't even mind having small breasts if they weren't shaped the way they are now.
karategrrl
That Huffington post article was GREAT, strongirl!! TY so much for sharing! (Ironic, though, that its accompanying avatar-ish photo on the right siderail of the web page showed the cleavage of an obvously augmented woman. Bubbles/bolt-ons/half-melons. Blegh.

My fave quote from the article:
"Over the next 10 years, as I graduated from high school and college, I also graduated from a kitchen accessory to a solid A..."

My fave readers' comments:
-"Enjoy your little boobs! I am often envious of girls with less. They look so light and dainty, or athletic, or just neater."Light? Dainty? Athletic? Neat? I'll take that!!

-"My mom took me to the doctor as a teenager to see why I wasn't "developin­g" He said it was just the way I was.But the good thing was he told her more harm would be done to me by her making a big deal about my small chest than me having a small chest."Holy Christ, a smart man!!! wink.gif
karategrrl
DeeRayy, very interesting article you shared, too, though I have to say I was surprised to hear the author say she had a "deformity." I guess if her doctor says it's an official "condition," I suppose it is, but honestly my first reaction was not "oh, look at that deformity," it was more like, "oh, booblets, cutely/perky pointy." I feel REALLY bad about the self-mutilation this girl did around her left areola.

DeeRayy, if your doc is one you trust and feel comfy with, yes, do discuss this--maybe it will put your mind at ease? Also, forgive me, but I forgot your age, but I believe you're still in your teens? Remember that your breasts will change a lot through your life, especially if you have children. And I don't mean, "wait and your breasts will grow;" just remember that your booblets have a lot more years with you yet and may change a bit in shape/structure/size, as we all do in so many ways. I feel that not only are we putting pressure on ourselves to be over a certain size, but to be a certain shape, too. Aren't we saddled with enough physical "requirements" to meet?

So sorry you feel so bad!!!!! <<<<<HUGS!!!>>>>> Report back, and feel free to vent here ANYTIME!!!!!
strongirl
I totally share Karategrrl's reaction to that link that DeeRayy shared - those breasts don't look the slightest bit "deformed" to me and I wonder if that girl was mis-diagnosed. I admit to being slightly shocked that she would actually cut herself there...that's a new one on me, I've only heard of people cutting their arms and such. Good god, the suffering people go through for no good reason. I shake my head with sadness.

I was happy to read about her bf's appreciation of them and sense of humor helping her disarm her insecurities. As we've said in here before, it's what the woman herself feels that matters the most but gosh, it's great when those we love can help us love ourselves better.

I must say, my bf would totally jerk off over that girl's picture. As I've said, he loves the small cone-shaped ones. We just had a fun fantasy session around that in bed the other night. I do not have that shape but heck, I can't begrudge him his fantasies when he shares them so trustingly with me. And on some spiritual level, I can only hope that we send some positive energy for small pointy boobies out into the universe when we do that.

And the comments under the Huffpost article...many positive, appreciative comments for small, pointy ones! Ladies, this shape is not necessarily a negative! We've just gotten our perceptions so distorted by having zillions of images of fake half-coconuts shoved in our faces for years.
karategrrl
QUOTE(strongirl @ Jul 19 2011, 01:21 PM) *
I must say, my bf would totally jerk off over that girl's picture. As I've said, he loves the small cone-shaped ones...And on some spiritual level, I can only hope that we send some positive energy for small pointy boobies out into the universe when we do that.

OMG, that is SO wonderful on so many levels!

Thanks so much for sharing!! Ladies, every post, every thought shared here helps me so much in my self-boobie-love and just overall happiness/contentedness.

Sending more love to you, DeeRayy! I am so willing to bet you're totally "normal!" Hope my last post didn't sound like you should "wait for your breasts to change," b/c you're only one of MANY women with breasts of your shape (and just like strongirl's man loves!) and I bet they're just fine! There are so many shapes of breasts and bodies at any given time, and at any given time they could change for any reason. My wish is that we can all love our boobies, whatever they happen to be looking like at any given time--erect or relaxed, swollen or smaller, rounder or pointier. Something for everyone. Hell, M&Ms come in so many colors; give me the variety pack any day! wink.gif That was the point I was trying to make, though I don't think I made it well!

<<Ommmmmmmm....DeeRayy luuuuuuuuuuve>>
DeeRayy
karategrrl & strongirl, thanks SO MUCH for the responses. they definitely made me feel better.

i guess the fact that she was diagnosed with a deformity caught me off guard and made me feel abnormal. btw karategrrl yes i'm still only 19 so i know my body still has yet to do a lot of changing. i can actually make them change shape- when it's warm and they're relaxed the look pointy but it if i cup them in my hands and rub them a little, or if it gets cold they become rounded and look like a different pair. so that's pretty funny. strongirl, i always get taken aback when you say your bf actually likes that shape. people always say "oh don't fuss, there's plenty of guys that like small, or pointy or whatever". but i guess it's a little harder for me personally to believe since i have yet to meet any (but then again i've only had one serious relationship). so that's probably because i'm still young.

but once again, thanks for calming my worries <3
KeraBear
karategrrl, i also found it interesting that just about the same time you posted about being topless, THIS web site posted this:
http://bust.com/blog/2011/07/18/nyc-women-...ing-images.html

Strongirl, your jerking off comment, while seemingly crude ha ha, made me feel good too. smile.gif i remember you mentioning that once or twice before... probably in response to my venting about my own pointy boobs.

Dee, i hope you and your booblets felt much love and appreciation today! You own a pair of shape-shifters? Cooooool! Your boobs are like the "Mystique" of our lil group. smile.gif. (Hmm.... I doooooo hope there is at least one fellow geek here who understood that reference lol!)
secretsights88
DeeRayy (well here I am delurking after several months!), I have heard of tuberous breasts in the 007b.com site. The thing is 1. the girl in the pic doesn't look like she has true tuberous breasts... and 2. while doctors call them a deformity (which I don't think they are), tuberous breasts can make it a bit more difficult to produce milk. But that's it... that's the only medical "complication" that they can present (but then again even naturally busty women can have milk supply complications). As far as pleasure goes, they are still sensitive enough, so there should be no issues in how they respond to stimulation. Also, their shape can probably make them better for sucking (I don't know, it gives me that impression).

Cheers everyone!
strongirl
OK, I've spent way too much time reading the comments on that article I posted a link to earlier, about the chick who started going braless. But it's been fascinating! Some bummers but way way more positive comments. So to help you all save time, I'm pasting a few here. These are all from men. (There were also scores of comments from smallies who don't wear bras, worth noting.) But I'm posting these because sometimes I think those of us in here have a hard time believing men really feel this way. They do.

I'm a photographer of women. I see the wide variety of breasts, breast sizes, types of nipples, etc., and sometimes I'm shocked that a woman will HATE her breasts because they are A cup breasts, even though they look great on her figure. I remember one redhead in particular who announced she was going to get breast enhancement from A to B. Understand, she had really gorgeous puffy nipples mounted on beautiful A cup mounds. I begged her not to change anything and I think she hasn't. If I provided the reassurance she needed to feel happier with what Mother Nature delegated to her, I'm proud.

Women should really just try to be happy with what they have. Whatever size you have, there are plenty of guys that will like them.

It seems that women think guys only like big breasts. Actually, some guys love big ones, others hate them. Some guys love small ones, others hate them. Seriously. Just let it go. Confidence is sexy.

My girl friend has normal sized medium A type boob's and we're both 17 and i love the way she is already,all i care about it being with her and being there for her and i respect your opinion about your braless issue, but you know what? Who's to make you tell what to do...enjoy what you like and what you do and just live your life! =)

I don't get what all the fuss is about. I love and prefer smaller breasts, though I don't tell my current girlfriend that as hers are large and it might hurt her feelings. They aren't significant players in my choice of mates, but in all honesty, I prefer them petite.

Aftrer traveling around the world last year...I noticed there was conspicuous lack of Boob jobs in almost all of the other countries...The norm was for most women to have small to average size boobs...I rather enjoyed the fact that breasts weren't the overriding obsession it seems to be Here in the States...What ever size you are, is just perfect to me...I think a great smile, a great attitude, an engaged brain and kindness, are much more attaractive then a single body part....But, that's just me.

Small breasts are amazingly and esthetically the best. Youthful and athletic! Healthy and stylish? Big breasts are over rated. Small ones are so adorable and user friendly.
KeraBear
Thanks for taking the time to do this, Strongirl. My favorite was the last one. "Adorable and user-friendly." LOL! smile.gif
DeeRayy
i recently saw a trailer to that movie "friends with benefits" and one scene made me smile:

Justin Timberlake: I like your breasts.

Mila Kunis: Why? I think they're so tiny!

Justin: *shrugs and shakes his head*, They're still breasts.

hehe, mila kunis is now added to my small boobie hero list smile.gif
skindeep1991
Hey girls sorry i've been gone for a while been busy busy but i'm back... with news on my breasts... i'm considering getting my nipples pierced haha...I love piercings and tattoos and have a few already anyways I was thinking, I got a tattoo on my foot cause I don't like my feet so I enhanced it by putting a pretty picture on it so I thought what better way to accessorize my little breasties then by getting them pierced all pretty =D....

http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldabrfpH...fv3xlo1_500.jpg



These are some pictures of more alternative models with small breasticles <3 lots of love for these ladies....


http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kzohu6Sc...bosrwo1_500.jpg

http://images.phapit.com/uploaded_pics/phap2582.jpg

http://www.thebeergoggler.com/wp-content/u...l_1-475x630.jpg
karategrrl
Hi ladies, random thoughts:

Kera bear:
“shapeshifters!!”” LOL!!!
Actually, I’ve noticed lately that mine tend to be a little swollen in the mornings. So when I get up, yep, there’s karategrrl, happily squeezing her breasticles… (Oh, and my mammogram came back just fine. Thank you for the mammo support!)

Glad you could see through my somewhat uneloquent words , DeeRayy, and get some soothing form them and strongirl too. You deserve it.

Strongirl:
Thanks so much for posting those comments from others. LOVED them! (and yes, I also laughed over “user friendly!” LOVE IT!

Skindeep, if you want to get pierced, I say go for it. I personally would not (ouch!), but if you want to adorn those puppies, celebrate them and do so. I've considered a vertical clit hood piercing for reasons of pleasure, but...no sex for 6 weeks after. Uh, that's tough for me.

I'll check out those photos, skindeep!
karategrrl
PS: What was the name of that porn star someone posted about here? Early 20s, fair skin, dark hair, Polish-sounding last name ending in "-ski" or such? She was a total hottie.

And OMG, suicide girls, yes. tongue.gif
skindeep1991
=] happy to inform you that i've read up that article about going bra-less and it's inspired me to go bra-less today in a fitted top and so far no bad comments or strange looks... woop woop.

I love you ladies you're all beautiful =]
karategrrl
Skindeep, your booblets told mine that they had a really good time seeing the world!! Mine are jealous! laugh.gif
skindeep1991
QUOTE(karategrrl @ Jul 22 2011, 02:05 PM) *
Skindeep, your booblets told mine that they had a really good time seeing the world!! Mine are jealous! laugh.gif


they should be, maybe you should free your booblets too haha..
I think you guys are corrupting my little fragile mind, today before i got in the shower I was looking at myself in the mirror and talking to my booblets telling them that they are pretty and I loved them...then I realised what I was doing and decided its all your fault you strange people xD


also quick question...do you think nipple piercings look right on small boobies?... I've looked into it but most of the pictures I find are of women with bigger breasticles...hmmm
discowombat
QUOTE(skindeep1991 @ Jul 24 2011, 12:09 PM) *
do you think nipple piercings look right on small boobies?... I've looked into it but most of the pictures I find are of women with bigger breasticles...hmmm


Personally, I think it looks better on smaller breasted women. Probably you find more photos on larger breasted women because there just seems to be more women with larger breasts than us.
carlbug
I prefer not really big... normal size is ok
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