Oct 18 2006, 06:35 PM
Pherber, my friend, I have your answer! I give you - why incompetent people are so overconfident:http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?.../18/MN73840.DTLTA-DAAAAA!!!!
Oct 19 2006, 04:06 AM
Darn, I thought I could just blame patriarchy..
*e-mails this article to the government*
Oct 19 2006, 10:06 AM
V. interesting, maimy! I wonder if that holds true across the board... i.e., with respect to looks, to sexual prowess, to physial strength, etc.
But I do have to say-- I sometimes really enjoy that ridiculous cockiness. (Mostly if I know the person isn't truly taking themselves 100% seriously). When my ex would get drunk, for instance, he'd occasionally start talking up how hot he was, and I got such a kick out of it! I found it super cute/ kinda sexy.
Nothing to contribute on the general topic. For some reason I got lucky enough to not have many lame-o guys sneak into my dating life. But I'm sure enjoying reading y'all's contributions!
Oct 19 2006, 11:59 AM
I only remembered this at the weekend but when the boy and I first started going out (or maybe before) over three and a half years ago, I had to repeat myself and he apologised and said "I can't hear things above a certain pitch". I have a fairly high-pitched voice, low volume. It's actually a hearing condition he has though!
Another doozy: we were discussing being hungover with friends and one of us mentioned "hair of the dog", he admitted to never hearing the phrase and then proceeded to say "well I do come from ******* (affluent area in our city)" hence implying that the rest of us were common?
I love him to bits but sometimes he suffers from foot in mouth disease.
Oct 19 2006, 02:02 PM
When my house got broken into, my boyfriend at the time (but not for long!!) told me I was psychologically manifesting it.
Oct 21 2006, 12:36 PM
I was starting a new quarter at school with a new class and the night before I was staring into the mirror looking at a huge huge zit on the side of my face.
My boyfriend observed this and said "At least you won't have any creeps bothering you in class like usual. That zit's a little hard to look past. They'll be looking at other girls"
I gasped horrified but he explained "No, no, no...of course I know how beautiful you are...but they won't, so you won't get hassled and you can just learn!"
Oct 21 2006, 02:25 PM
Hey Avette - your boyfriend wouldn't happen to be a Sagittarius, would he?
Oct 21 2006, 07:49 PM
ah no, he's a virgo...but my pa's a Sag, marked by an absolute lack of tact, despite a good heart somewhere in there.
Oct 29 2006, 08:16 PM
I told my bf I was going to post this here:
Me: do you like my perfume?
Him: well, the best thing about it is that you don't wear much of it.
I don't think he meant that the way it sounded.
Oct 30 2006, 07:03 PM
Hee. Maybe he likes having to sniff about your delicate bits trying to find your elusive, magical fragrance ... ?
Oct 31 2006, 12:15 AM
likes having to sniff about your delicate bits trying to find your elusive, magical fragrance
thats DEFO something I would do!
Oct 31 2006, 01:15 AM
You should make a game out of it... just put the tiniest drop someplace really random, like behind your knee or something, and make him sniff it out
Or maybe I'm just missing/ignoring a double entendre and the above comment is nonsensical and irrelevant. ?
Oct 31 2006, 02:21 AM
Complete derail, but on topic...
Scent is an odd thing. It's the closest sense to memory. HB is *particular* about my scent. While HB LOVES the scent of my nether regions when I'm aroused (He has expressed his joy in finding my dirty panties/his underpants that I've worn after the fact.), he also does like the subtle application of Chanel No. 5 or Chanel No. 19 or YSL In Love Again to my pulse points when we're just out. It turns him on. To him it screams femininity. I have dated men that had such sensitive noses that they couldn't stand any perfume at all, but that were turned on by the "just me" smell. Personal body chemistry makes a HUGE difference. I won't hug my mum because I hate her perfume. It's... ACK. The key is to just make it subtle enough that it can't be sensed olfactorially unless he's right on top of you. I apply to the spots just below my ears, my neck, the crooks of my arms, my wrists, my belly button, the crooks of my knees & my ankles. I go as light as possible so as not to be displeasing to the taste. A man has to be CLOSE to smell it. Ah, the joy of layering products!
Personally, as far as boys go, I can go either way. My buddy Tcrush wears Grey Flannel in the least little bit & it's sexy as hell. Another friend wears nothing & smells like all things good to me. I think the smell of clean boy smells best as long as it's not tainted by Irish Spring, Old Spice or Tag, what have you.
Oct 31 2006, 12:57 PM
abercrombie woods. they stopped making it. its like, the epitome of a man-scent. yummmmm.
Oct 31 2006, 03:06 PM
i loathe perfume on a man. absolutely Hate it.
some essential oils are nice though, but i feel that way about perfume in general. it all smells so fake to me, like bug spray or cleaning products or something. really, i hate them all.
the mister likes my natural scent so much that he discourages me washing with soap. what can i say, i am his josephine.
Oct 31 2006, 04:11 PM
Aural, I love Grey Flannel too. It's strange, kog3100 wears that as his signature scent, and Bowling Green is a second choice he sometimes has. Both were colognes my father happened to wear. Neither smell in the slightest like my dad. But I adore the GF, and am neutral to BG for the most part. He also uses Sienna soap from Crabtree & Evelyn; a black sandalwood soap. Incredibly clean, that man. Elegantly, immaculately, utterly fine and REfined. His consciousness of what "works" for him is somehow so very sexy, too.
And you are so right - less is so much more. My mom's the same way!
Octinoxate, I used to play that game with an old flame. Heh.
(WHEN I wear perfume, which isn't regularly, I either wear YSL's Paris alone, or Paris and Dior's Tendre Poison. Paris smells like roses fermenting into red wine on me. I love it. kog3100 has a vial of my signature blend, and tells me he takes it out often to "smell me". He also misses "me" actually warming up the perfumes.)
Nov 2 2006, 08:00 AM
not cologne related but, dumb things said recently - i was out on halloween with a friend and his friend, who was REALLY [socially and politically] conservative white guy - this guy started going on about the Hispanic population, saying something like, gosh, they're everywhere! ..... then as the conversation went away from that, as we were people-watching all the Halloween costumes, and there were many drunk, scantily-clad girls in costumes, he starts mumbling [almost sounding aroused], yeah, acting as slutty as they are in real life, just using Halloween as as excuse to be slutty, etc....then proceeded to say that he REALLY wished it was 1955 again, [because according to him], the US military was strongest at that point, and women were not slutty.
Nov 2 2006, 08:09 PM
Nov 3 2006, 10:10 AM
p176...I don't even know what to say to that! What an asshole!
Nov 3 2006, 05:07 PM
This wasn't a date so much as a really bad hookup that I want to erase from my memory.
I was trying to get him to go down on me a bit more. His response: "No, you have a really strong scent, I don't like it."
Excuse me?! I have slept with a lot of people and not one of them has ever, EVER complained about how I smell down there! I am a woman, I am human, it's not gonna smell like roses or whatever the fuck you're expecting.
Then, he proceeded to go limp. After a while he finally just said "I'm not as attracted to you as I thought I would be."
And that was that.
Nov 3 2006, 07:18 PM
oh, ugh. limp-dick And bad head, and He wasn't attracted to You eh? n/m how you felt. guys like that deserve to be single forever.
Nov 3 2006, 07:28 PM
It wasn't bad head, it was more like no head!
And not only that but if he wasn't attracted to me why the hell did he want to fuck me in the first place?
Nov 3 2006, 09:04 PM
because guys can be pigs.
Nov 3 2006, 09:47 PM
Oxtinocate, you interpretted it more like he meant it - I had thought he meant it was so gross that the best thing about it was that he couldn't smell it!! But when I made him smell the bottle later, he said mmmm and that he likes it because it smells like me (awwww) so I forgave him.
The whole subject came up because I'd been trialling Chanel no. 19 but he didn't like it, and said he didn't normally like perfume. But to be fair what I wear is actually a man's cologne.
Scent really is a memory thing. YSL's Paris is ruined for me forever because we used to use a bottle of it to disguise shoe odor at school! So even though there's nothing wrong with it, it's completely associated with old track shoes in my mind.
P 176 were you frightened!?
Nov 6 2006, 10:32 AM
well, thankfully we were not on a date, we were just hanging out with other friends, but he was checking me out like he was deciding whether or not to ask me out - EW! based on the way he was saying what he was saying, i thought he's probably the type who likes "kinky" sex where he's dominant, and he's pretty disrespectful of the woman involved.
Nov 6 2006, 12:09 PM
Jeez. Some men are just incredibly stupid and tactless.
I wish there was a website that listed all the men that any self-respecting woman should avoid.
I can't imagine what was going through your head at that point, Candycane.
Nov 6 2006, 04:48 PM
Dang, Venetia!! That is some high class odor-eatin' y'all used there! *Grin*
I may never be able to wear it again ...
Nov 7 2006, 04:41 PM
brutalbunny, I can't remember just what was going through my head at the time. But I did send him quite a scathing email afterwards. I should have just kicked him in the balls.
Nov 7 2006, 06:27 PM
candycane-you rock!alot of less secure women (myself included) would internalize something like that and make them forever self-conscious about their scent when in reality,it is obvious that the so-called man is just immature and has issues.
Nov 8 2006, 06:21 AM
Aww Maimy you've never smelt it mixed with shoes, so you'll be fine! (-:
Nov 8 2006, 12:23 PM
Brutalbunny, you could always check out dontdatehimgirl.com
Nov 9 2006, 04:37 PM
This is an oldie, but I was turned off by a guy acting like a know-it-all.
I was saying how I was surprised that Motley Crue had Samantha Mahoney drum for them on a tour, thinking they wouldn't want a woman for an equal musician, and the guy went, "Motley Crue are pretty woman-friendly."
I read The Dirt. They may be "woman-friendly" in that they like their company, but they were like tissues to them, very expendable. Maybe with the exception of Tommy Lee's rocker-looking sister.
Also, I was telling a joke I heard on Conan, where Geddy Lee from Rush is calling to suggest that their song "2012" should be the theme for the 2012 Olympics.
The guy immediately cuts in and goes, "It's 2112."
I had to tell him that I knew, that the joke was that they were so desperate for cash they'd change the title of the song. He just couldn't shut up to let me tell the joke, he had to correct me immediately.
Nov 10 2006, 08:54 AM
anna_k, I can't stand people like that! Men and women alike, I hate anyone that acts like a know-it-all especially if they actually have the wrong info.
Nov 15 2006, 07:26 PM
i had just bought a new pair of boots that, to be honest, i wasn't too sure about. i decided to show them to the boy and see what his opinion was. sadly, it was the following:
"i don't know...they're pretty high fashion. i don't know if you can pull them off". fucker.
Nov 15 2006, 10:02 PM
I was happily dining alone at school the other day when my friend's annoying brother spotted me and decided to come sit with me in spite of my best efforts to mentally will him to go away. Some gems from our "conversation":
"That salad looks really good, but it needs some bacon. Or a juicy steak." (I am a vegan and he knows it.)
"I hate figure-drawing. The models should wear underwear, because let's face it, vaginas are really ugly, and some penises are unattractive too. Why can't they hire a hot chick to pose for the class?" (umm...)
"If there's a REALLY hot girl, I'll just ask her if she wants to fuck, get it over with and never talk to her again. But if there's a girl who's, you know, pretty, but not super-hot, kinda like you, then you gotta talk to her first and go through all the motions because girls like that actually deserve it." (Okay first of all, what the fuck? and second of all, it's good to know that I'm not hot. Thanks.)
Then the next day at work when my boss made a neutral observation on how many layers I was wearing, my male coworker decided to say that I needed those layers "in case a strong wind came around and blew your bony ass away." WHAT? I am not bony, I'm not even that skinny, just average. He's the one who's bony, but he always feels the need to make passive-aggressive comments to me and this one other girl because he has a crush on us and neither of us is interested. My friend tends to get the brunt of it because she doesn't have a boyfriend, which makes the rejection worse in his mind.
THEN I told my boyfriend about it and he said, "So? Isn't that like a compliment for you since you think you're fat?" Um, no, there is a difference between "thin" and "bony." Ass.
Nov 16 2006, 01:07 AM
Oh my lord, the only way I can react to this thread is to laugh. (Otherwise I'd get waaaaay too frustrated/pissed.) Similarly, I can only laugh at iffy things that this dude I'm seeing does/says... for instance, the other day we were doing some light hanky-panky (what? Did I say that?) and he gets up to go get a drink or something and leaves the room singing a song about how I have a big butt. ? ...Boys!
Nov 16 2006, 11:21 AM
QUOTE(_octinoxate @ Nov 16 2006, 02:24 AM)
QUOTE(hellotampon @ Nov 15 2006, 11:19 PM)
Nov 16 2006, 06:24 PM
QUOTE(hellotampon @ Nov 15 2006, 11:19 PM)
...he always feels the need to make passive-aggressive comments to me and this one other girl because he has a crush on us and neither of us is interested. My friend tends to get the brunt of it because she doesn't have a boyfriend, which makes the rejection worse in his mind.
Great Zot, I know six of That Guy, and I want to kill every one of him (now seven, with Coworker Dork). As if someone's relationship is (a) nothing more than a buffer, and (b) a buffer is required for any woman to be allowed not to want any particular moronic boy.
Nov 17 2006, 09:48 PM
"You're not fat, but you are fatty," said the boyfriend whilst grabbing at my stomach.
Nov 18 2006, 05:08 PM
Ugh, fatty? If a guy said that to me (even though I am actually fat) I'd definitely give him a piece of my mind.
Nov 21 2006, 08:07 AM
again, not a boy i was on a date with, but he was going to ask me out....except....: well, read the story below:
after work i met some friends at the neighborhood pub down the street from my house, and this one friend of a friend is apparently a muslim pakistani - he was hitting on me because i'm indian, but then decided to be an ass when he found out that i did not grow up in india - , and i'm like, i'm not going to apologize for growing up where i did, so he started calling me white and saying funky things about white people (no matter that everyone else in the place was white...i even asked the bartender if there was a polite way to get this friend of a friend outta there)...but he kept saying like, oh i'm just kidding...no i'm not...hahah.
so at one point, i was talking to my other friend (who the paki guy was friends with), and the paki guy came up and i was like, i'm sorry, was i talking to you?....i'm just kidding...no i'm not... LOL what an asshole. so he went back inside, and i said good night to my friends and went home.
Nov 21 2006, 12:07 PM
Guys who try to get to know me usually ask the same boring questions:
Where do you come from? (Oh, how obscure to speak with a little accent)
What kind of name is this? (Note: people with slightly exotic names hear that question ALL THE TIME, FFS refrain!!)
Is this your natural haircolour? ( I'm a peroxide glow-in-the-dark blonde, how natural can that be?)
What is your natural haircolour? (*yawns* who cares)
And now my favourite:
Is there anything else you do? (Nice way of belittleling my job)
Nov 21 2006, 12:23 PM
my all-time favourite:
boy (rico suave-style): "stay." (pushing me onto bed, straddling me, and licking my ear.)
me (firm): "i really don't think think it'd be worth it."
boy (earnest): "i'll be quick! you won't even notice!"
this, after a date that consisted of watching the movie "alive" (about the plane crash cannibals) while being regaled with tales of his roommate's loud sex life.
Nov 21 2006, 01:03 PM
"i'll be quick, you won't even notice!"?
this was supposed to somehow convince you? ugh.
go out and purchase yourself a clue, useless dude.
Nov 21 2006, 03:05 PM
yeah; tragically, he was dead serious. if you're out there, tommy c. from long island, i still resent you not lending me cab fare! manhattan ave. at three a.m. geez.
Nov 22 2006, 04:13 PM
Crazy things men said to me? Hmmm, a lot, but I blocked most of it, I guess.
When he found out my political preference...
"You're so cute when you get angry, say something socialist!"
Scary Man: "Do you come here often?"
Scary Man's Friend: "He likes you, he wants to take you out!"
Scary and slightly embarrassed man: "I like you, I want to take you out for dinner, we could eat pizza"
Note: the man in question was a pizza baker....
Me: "I don't know..."
Scary Man's Friend: "Oh come on, go! He's so shy, he's scared!"
Scary Man: "That is a large piercing on your chin!" staring at my labret spike. "You should take it off, so we can kiss!"
Me: "Shy huh? I don't think so, and, no..."
That and a guy who went on and on about a dozen of pretty women, his fetishes and one woman in particular , on what was supposed to be OUR FIRST date(hello, am I in the room?!). The asswipe, he was my boyfriend for two years(yes, I can be very stupid).
Nov 29 2006, 02:36 PM
my ex from about four years ago (who, i would like to note, *i* broke up with) is in this really great sketch comedy troupe in new york. we've sort of vaguely kept in touch, the last time i saw him in person was about two years ago but we got along great and had fun. i've followed his comedy troupe (they're big on the internets) and they're starting to get noticed and i'm totally proud of him and them (they're all friends from college, so i knew a few of them when i was dating him too). but the past few months, if i email him he doesn't reply, and when i i.m. him he's totally curt or doesn't reply. i chalked it up to him being busy, but this exchange last night just took the cake:
me [pulling teeth to get him to talk]: so...how's [comedy troupe] going?
him: we finally got an agent, he's getting us some great stuff
me: like what?
him: i can't really tell you, but keep checking our blog!
me: okay......well, how have you been? what have you been up to?
him: dude. just google me.
seriously????????? i took this dude's virginity. i have so many embarassing stories about him. and he used to be a decent kid. now he thinks he's too cool for school since he has an agent. seriously. i'm so. effing. pissed at this. oh, also? at no point in the conversation did he even bother to ask how i was or what i'd been up to. asshat.
Nov 29 2006, 04:43 PM
so clearly, mouse, his douche baggery gives you no choice but to say who he is now
(Google that, bitch!)
Nov 29 2006, 04:57 PM
haha. i don't care to have it traced back to here though, quite frankly. though if one is familiar with comedy groups who became popular in college due to teh intarwebs, one could guess quite easily.
i think a small amount of fame goes to people's heads quite easily--a large amount of fame i think overwhelms people and they stay humble, but a small amount is crap. i had the same thing happen with an aspiring musician friend who ended up in a documentary, but she realized soon enough that she wasn't as big a shot as she thought she was, and stopped being lame, and now is cool and still becoming an awesome musician.
one can only hope the same thing will happen to this dude.
Dec 1 2006, 01:25 PM
Aww, man! Its gotta be one of the Lonely Island dudes, huh?
I used to live in LA and am all too familiar with a little fame going to someones head. I don't wanna name names either but I could tell some stories about a handful of young actors. Amazing how a stupid Gap ad and a bit part in an indie flick will make a guy think hes Brad Pitt!