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sassygrrl
Yay!'

I think I found my caterer!
pollystyrene
More Yays!

Okay, here's the dress. It's very different from what I thought I wanted, but when I tried it on, I knew. It's just like they said. No crying or anything. My mom and prophecy were with me. The ladies in the shop were really nice- when I told them this was the one I really liked of the ones I tried on, they said, "okay, can we make you into a bride?" Um, okay....they did my hair in a little half-up do (wish I'd had time to wash my hair yesterday morning! Oh well!), put a rhinestoned head band in it, gave me earrings and a bracelet. it was pretty cool to see the whole outfit, even if it's not the exact accessories and hairstyle I'm going to do.

I called the other designer that I'd been doing the mail order thing with and broke the news on a voicemail. I'm not going to put my deposit on the new dress until I make sure they refund my money.

ETA: For stargazer- the link is a picture of the dress on the designer's website, not on me, so the surprise won't be ruined. PM me if anyone's interested in the pics of it on me.
pollystyrene
I BOUGHT IT!!!
auralpoison
Huzzah!
girl_logic
That dress is beautiful.
sassygrrl
I love it!

Not much happening here. Just trying to get together venues, and start a short list. The problem is I haven't seen any of them, but my friend's backyard(it's where Mcgeek proposed, but I'm not sure if I want my wedding there). I think I did find my caterer though. Also, trying to get together some sort of wedding party.



sassygrrl
We have a caterer/reception! It's this place: http://www.cakesandalerestaurant.com/eat.html. They have awesome beer and wine too. Mcgeek and I went there for a date last month and loved it. They can fit about 44 people there, and are going to have apps, a 4 course meal, and make me a wedding cake. They're also serving booze, have servers/bartenders, and have an Ipod hook-up or room for a band.

Now, I just have to find a ceremony venue.
I'm feeling a little better. We may have the wedding on Pi day. It's a Sunday, and it looks like it would be a little less expensive.

Also, I've got my girlfriends(both online and IRL) to help me as well.

jami
that wedding dress is most fabulous.
pollystyrene
QUOTE(sassygrrl @ Aug 4 2009, 01:16 PM) *
We have a caterer/reception! It's this place: http://www.cakesandalerestaurant.com/eat.html. They have awesome beer and wine too. Mcgeek and I went there for a date last month and loved it. They can fit about 44 people there, and are going to have apps, a 4 course meal, and make me a wedding cake. They're also serving booze, have servers/bartenders, and have an Ipod hook-up or room for a band.

Now, I just have to find a ceremony venue.
I'm feeling a little better. We may have the wedding on Pi day. It's a Sunday, and it looks like it would be a little less expensive.

Also, I've got my girlfriends(both online and IRL) to help me as well.


That restaurant looks adorable and the food is making me drool, sassy! How big is that garden area they have? Could you have the ceremony there?

Thanks for the compliments on the dress- my mom and I went to the fabric store on Friday and got fabric and trim to make the cap sleeves. The lady at the dress shop suggested buying a veil and using that to make the sleeves, but the veils are about $200, which seems like a lot to just cut it up! We got the trim and fabric, with enough to make a wrap thing for under $90. Woohoo!
sassygrrl
I know I love their food! I may get in trouble eating there from now on with my diet. They've even gotten me to like lima beans. I am convincing my parents to go with the next time they're in town. We always tend to go to the same restaurant, and it gets a little old.

I have a venue I think. I just need to book the date with them (cross parts) Mcgeek and I were down the street walking around downtown (there was this huge sale), and I told him that I wanted to check out the gazebo. We walked around the corner from the courthouse, and it was set up for a wedding yesterday! How great is that? I didn't want to do the courthouse b/c they wanted you to book for 8 hours. It was also close to 4K. This is literally in the backyard. I think we can get it for $200-300.
Here's a link: http://www.tripadvisor.com/LocationPhotos-...a.html#17366887.

However, if we end up doing the wedding in March it may be pretty cold. That may change my dress options. It's even snowed in early March before. I wanted to do a tea-length dress, but may change my mind. I'll figure it out. That's the fun part. l

Polly, that's great on the wrap! smile.gif Yay!


MadameHooch
QUOTE(sassygrrl @ Aug 4 2009, 02:16 PM) *
We have a caterer/reception! It's this place: http://www.cakesandalerestaurant.com/eat.html. They have awesome beer and wine too. Mcgeek and I went there for a date last month and loved it. They can fit about 44 people there, and are going to have apps, a 4 course meal, and make me a wedding cake. They're also serving booze, have servers/bartenders, and have an Ipod hook-up or room for a band.

Now, I just have to find a ceremony venue.
I'm feeling a little better. We may have the wedding on Pi day. It's a Sunday, and it looks like it would be a little less expensive.

Also, I've got my girlfriends(both online and IRL) to help me as well.



I just read about that place in this month's issue of Bon Appetite! It looks great.
sassygrrl
Thanks! We finally met with the owners yesterday, and just talked about food for an hour. It was great. We haven't signed a contract, but I'm hoping we can go with them.

Of course, I told my mother and she went nuts. She got all weird when I said that they don't have a set menu (they change it on a daily basis), and just kept asking about money. I told them there were two festivals going on in early Sept, and they didn't seem to listen. Ugh! We got into a bit of an fight, and called back twenty minutes later and decided not to come up.



pollystyrene
((sassy)) I had a little parental misery yesterday, too. My parents are not [oops, forgot the "not"] paying for the wedding- they're just not financially able to. LeBoy's parents are happy to give us the money, and no one's resentful or anything. They're being pretty agreeable to how we want to have the wedding and haven't even pulled the "we're paying so we get to decide how it will be" card. We're having an iPod DJ, so we'll only have the music we want to play and still have the benefits of a professional sound system, being run by a professional DJ and he'll make announcements and all that crap DJ's do.

So, last night we were eating dinner with my family and my dad says, "so, mom tells me that you have a DJ in mind." I said, "well, we've already booked him, signed a contract and everything." He says, "well, I have an idea for you- I think it would be cool to have an Irish band and a klezmer band play together for the wedding."

My mom's side of the family is Irish and my dad's side is Jewish, so it would be a nice mesh of music and my cultural background, and I'm interested in hearing what they'd come up with. My dad goes on to say that he has a friend who had volunteered to run a soundboard and is trying to get another friend who works for the local PBS station to film it as a piece for PBS, and the bands could use the audio for a CD...

...at my wedding?!?!?


I asked how long he was thinking of having them play, and he said, "it would probably take about three hours to get enough footage." I said, "if they want to play three or four songs and make a demo CD, that's fine, but I'm not interested in having them play for basically my entire wedding. And I don't really want to have to worry about a film and CD being made at my reception, either." He said, "there'd be nothing to worry about- I'd have control of it all." I think a blood vessel burst in my head, and I was like, "uh, no! I'm not doing that at my wedding- I just want my music played by a DJ and that's it!"

He got up from the table to bring something into the kitchen or something, and when he came back, he was singing one of those songs that they play at every freaking wedding, "Celebrate Good Times" or whatever and said something like, "so you'd rather play that at your wedding?" and I said, "no, that's why I'm having an iPod DJ, so I don't have to hear songs like that!"

I hope I didn't offend him too much, but it's like, my wedding is not the appropriate time to live out his musical fantasy (my dad's really into ethnic music) and since he's not putting any money into it, he really doesn't have any right to expect us to go with his idea.

Argh! I'm going to talk to my mom when I see her tonight and make sure he wasn't offended, but seriously, what did he expect?
p_176
so far our only plans are to have it at the house. we'll need a JOP, and to figure out what food is easiest to have, esp buffet style. i'm not planning on buying more alcohol than a case or two of champagne, for the toast, since most folks in the family don't drink. our friends who do drink can bring their own :-) i don't know. i'm sure i'll change my mind a bunch between now and whenever i need to decide on food :-)
sassygrrl
((polly))) That's fucked up.

((p-176)))

Ah...the guest list! I'm trying to get people to email me their addy's for the Save the Date cards. My mother keeps changing her mind of who she wants to come. I thought it was only 3 couples. She told me that she didn't want her local crowd, and now she's saying she does. It's annoying. I don't want it to be all her drunken friends. We can only invite about 40 people. I've only met these local people a few times.

In good news, we have the reception/restaurant nailed down. We met with them last weekend, and damn the food is going to be awesome!! Now, we just have to sign the contract. I'm a tad worried about giving me parents our budget, but I think I'll just fax it to them.

Mcgeek is also finally helping me out which is great. I was really worried about that.
pollystyrene
Our guest list is at 188 (I have no idea how that happened! Our venue only holds 180, so there'd better be at least 8 people who can't come!) When we started, we only wanted 150 people, so we said 50 people from my side, 50 people from LeBoy's side and 50 of our friends. His mom gave us a guest list of about 70 people, but that was okay because we had way less than 50 friends. Person-by-person we started adding more to each category and now we're up to 188.

Can you do that for your mom, give her a limit of how many people she wants to add (doesn't have to be split evenly like ours was)? I guess you'd have to accept her drinking buddies, though. Eh, ask your bartender to start watering down their drinks after awhile! wink.gif

Now my dad is trying to dictate what food we serve- I want brisket, chicken. pulled pork and ribs. I was willing to get rid of the ribs because they are expensive, but my mother-in-law apparently loves them and is willing to go over budget if necessary. Okay, whatever- I'm happy to have both. Our catering options are a local BBQ restaurant and a friend of my dad's who owns a BBQ stand down in Springfield, IL. We already have a quote from the local place and I've been corresponding with my dad's friend to work out the details so he can give us a quote. My dad asked me to forward him what his friend and I have been discussing, so I did that yesterday. Last night, there's an email in my inbox from my dad, to me and his friend, saying that if we're going to do ribs we should get rid of the pulled pork because it's from the same animal and then we can not spend money on buns, either because everything can be eaten with a fork & knife or with your hands. mad.gif I replied back and simply said, "I would prefer to keep all four meats and the buns on the menu." My dad replied back to me only and said that it's ridiculous to keep the pork because it costs more and it doesn't look as good in a chafing dish, and can become dried out. It's like, I appreciate your concerns about the food and LeMom's money, but it's not your decision and stop giving your opinions to my vendors, even if they are your friends! Argh!

I always assumed LeMom would the the pain-in-the-ass in this planning process; never thought it would be my dad!
sassygrrl
Polly, I finally did what you said. I gave her a number we were trying to reach for, and said she could only invite that many people. The same thing happened to my sister, and I didn't want it to happen again. I'm trying to set boundaries early.I was basically saying "Who do you want at my wedding?" She finally just picked one couple, instead of 5-6. I just hate it b/c she's constantly changing her mind.

As far as the drinking, I'm just going to have to accept it. Most family members at weddings are drunk. I think her drinking buddies are going to have an engagement party for me when we head up to SC in a few months.

I'm trying to use my management skills, and they're coming in handy!

Sorry about the catering woes. Stay true to you. This is your wedding.
Parents are so crazy aren't they? My mother is acting like a little kid.
candycane_girl
Hi ladies. I just came across this article and after reading about your problems with your families meddling with wedding plans I thought it might be helpful. I know that dealing with family can be tough and that even when you try to say things diplomatically people can still take it badly but it's worth a try.
sassygrrl
Thanks CCG! I'm going to steal some of those responses. I'm realizing to just try to do everything now so my parents/his family can't meddle too much. Both are such control freaks.
snow white
i was kicking around ideas for the wedding w/ my grandma today. my man and i are planning a simple and small "family affair". just family and close friends. an outdoor wedding perhaps next year. the only thing is his sister has 3 kids and they annoy the piss out of me. they're sweet kids but she's just a shitty parent, whenever they're around for the holidays it's always a screaming match and they think everyone is only there to see them. honestly, i don't want them at the wedding. if she could control her kids it'd be different. of course sitting in the kitchen with gram i insisted it's my wedding and i'll ban all kids if i want to, but i don't think that really works in reality. any advice??
sassygrrl
QUOTE(snow white @ Aug 28 2009, 02:24 AM) *
i was kicking around ideas for the wedding w/ my grandma today. my man and i are planning a simple and small "family affair". just family and close friends. an outdoor wedding perhaps next year. the only thing is his sister has 3 kids and they annoy the piss out of me. they're sweet kids but she's just a shitty parent, whenever they're around for the holidays it's always a screaming match and they think everyone is only there to see them. honestly, i don't want them at the wedding. if she could control her kids it'd be different. of course sitting in the kitchen with gram i insisted it's my wedding and i'll ban all kids if i want to, but i don't think that really works in reality. any advice??


Hey Snow,
I'm actually not having any kids at my wedding. I think they'd all cry. Plus, the majority of it is going to be a reception with a lot of booze and "grown up" food. Luckily for me, I only have a few friends that have children. They said they could get a babysitter. The wedding is going to be family and close friends of around 30-40 people. I did tell Mcgeek, and he has some friends that have 3-4 kids. I'm hoping they'll just want a nice vacay away from the kids. I don't want the kids to be the center of the attention, and scream and yell. I've seen that too much at wedding. We're hoping if we just limit the invites to +1 it should work out fine.
I'll let you know!
p_176
sassy and snow - the only person who would have kids at my wedding is my sister. she's so sensitive, i don't know how to tell her i'd pay for her babysitter. i want to have my nephew at the wedding, but he's only 2, and would be bored. i'm not sure how to handle it - even if i was as tactful as possible and got her to think it was her idea, she'd still be pissed, and complain to my mom, who would cry. <argh>
Divala
QUOTE(candycane_girl @ Aug 23 2009, 01:00 AM) *
Hi ladies. I just came across this article and after reading about your problems with your families meddling with wedding plans I thought it might be helpful. I know that dealing with family can be tough and that even when you try to say things diplomatically people can still take it badly but it's worth a try.


I'm not engaged yet, but should be in the next year or so, so I've been lurking here a lot. That website is like crack! Thanks so much for posting it!
snow white
we just invited our friends to bar-b-q this monday and my man said something about them getting a baby-sitter for their 18 month old so they can come and, uh, that didn't fly, lol. our girlfriend says, what r u tryin to say that u don't like my kid!?! and their kid is ok, not too obnoxious but still...we're not kids ppl! so if this is any indicator for the wedding it might be tricky.

our vague plans for the nuptuals is to have the ceremony and reception at my step-dad's camp in the adirondaks which is right on the lake and has enough room for about 10 ppl to stay over and we don't expect our family out of the area to come in for it (although they're more than welcome to) it's gonna be just a small get together between family and friends. i figure we'll each invite six of our own friends and their dates and then our immediate family will be there. the only stuff i'm concerned about is having a beautiful wedding dress, and a great wedding cake. otherwise it's a bring a covered dish and lets party affair! we're just not into the big deal weddings...

oh, and here's the dresses i can't live without (thought i know the list will change again again)

http://martinmccrea.com/virginia/#

well, only that link works sad.gif
pollystyrene
Martin McCrea makes great dresses (and that's a nice one!) They were my first pick, and I tried a couple of them on. I just ended up finding another one from another company that I liked more. But they're really well-made, and reasonably priced!

snow white
ya, i have found some less expensive ones at david's bridals but i can tell even from the picture the mcCrea dress will be something worth keeping. i don't know how much quality goes into a david's dress.
pollystyrene
Not much, snow white. Some of them are pretty, but they are the Wal-Mart of bridal gowns. Not as bad as those Izaac Mizrahi dresses you can get at Target- I heard you were lucky if you got through your wedding day with those intact.

quantumspice
The McCrea dresses are *gorgeous*, and $50-75 for being made to your measurements? Priceless.

It's somewhat weird since we're eloping -- if we go to Vegas, literally all we must do at this point is pick the date and my sister and I find dresses!
sassygrrl
That dress is gorgeous!
That scares me about David's Bridal.
I went online browsing last night, and found some great Stephanie James dresses, but they were starting at 1700. I'm still looking, and actually haven't been to a real shop. I'm considering Dolly Courture, and some other vintage stores.

I'm being really lazy about wedding planning lately. I'm just getting sick of it.Mcgeek helps one minute, and then just ignores me. Also, my bridesmaids are wanting to go shop for their dresses. For some reason, I'm just not motivated.




pollystyrene
Sassy, do you want matching dresses? If not, give them some guidelines and have them go shopping by themselves. Maybe tell them you get final say on what they pick, so save the receipt!

sassygrrl
Polly, I'm not sure. Part of me just wants to go with basic black, but I think it may be cool to have mis-matched dresses. Are you doing matching dresses?
pollystyrene
Well, I have a few dresses, all by the same designer, that I like. They're all the same fabric and they all come in the same colors, and the styles are similar. There's two colors I like (one is a muted lavender and the other is a muted light blue), and I'd be fine with people picking different dresses, as long as it's of these three, and it's in whichever color I decide to go with. Heck, if it worked out where different girls preferred different colors and they were in an alternating order of the way they're walking down the aisle, (blue, purple, blue, purple, blue), I'd be okay with that. Or maybe the maid and matron of honor wore one color and the bridesmaids wore the other color. I just don't want it to look totally random.

Cod, we met with the guy from the rental company who we'll be renting all the place settings and extra chairs and all sorts of other stuff from.....I'm so tired of making decisions already! And it's just becoming a mess of logistics, all the stuff we'll have to do that day and who's going to be responsible for getting each task done. blink.gif
snow white
QUOTE(quantumspice @ Sep 9 2009, 07:20 AM) *
The McCrea dresses are *gorgeous*, and $50-75 for being made to your measurements? Priceless.

It's somewhat weird since we're eloping -- if we go to Vegas, literally all we must do at this point is pick the date and my sister and I find dresses!


Vegas! awesome, that was our first idea but now we're doing a sweet & simple wedding. we were going to get married by an elvis impersonator, lol
quantumspice
We're still doing sweet and simple, it's just not going to be here. No Elvis impersonators! tongue.gif
p_176
we have a plan. basically, have the family meet at the courthouse. we want to get married on our anniversary, which next year is on a thursday. tough cookies for folks who want to attend, not my problem. then, we'll have a party that weekend for memorial day and to celebrate our marriage. for the family out of state, we will celebrate later in the year when we visit.
yay!
sassygrrl
I thought about doing two weddings b/c Mcgeek's family is from Boston, and they don't travel. Good for having a plan!

Being we're talking about dresses and such, does anyone like these:
http://whirlingturban.com/vintage_wedding_dresses.htm
http://whirlingturban.com/wedding_boutique/
http://www.dollycouture.net/pb/wp_94fc7dcf/wp_94fc7dcf.html
http://www.stephaniejamescouture.com/--- these are incredible, but $1700. Eek!!!

I don't know if they fit my body and all are online, so I have to order them. I haven't been shopping yet, but I know I don't want a long dress. I'm toying with the thought about getting a silly reception dress. I may go with different colors for bridesmaids dresses. I just want them to be able to wear them again. I always hated that in weddings.

roseviolet
Gorgeous dresses, Sassy! Love the shorter length.

This is going back a couple of days, but I wanted to put a word in about David's Bridal. I got my dress there because we were running short on time. I got an off-the-shoulder dress with an A line, full-length skirt & a train that bustled in the back. There was boning in the bodice & embroidered details all over the dress. My dress was well made & held up extremely well. I used their in-house alteration service to shorten the skirt and they did a great job. Note that I have years of experience with sewing & building costumes. I even helped build a couple of wedding dresses. Basically, I know good construction when I see it and I was pleased with the construction of my gown from David's.

However! If I'd had the time and money, I definitely would have considered other options, too. My dress was lovely, but it was not the dress of my dreams. I didn't have time to have someone build my dream dress, so I just got something close and went on with my life. biggrin.gif
snow white
sassy, those whirlingturban dresses are amazing! love love love them

roseviolet, so glad to hear the david's dresses are made well b/c i'm actually leaning towards a david's dress. i don't know how to get the pictures up b/c their website doesn't seem to allow that. but since we're getting married outsite i want something easy to move in, i don't want to have to tug at it all night and i'm small busted so it needs to be just right to make my boobs look good, u know? lol. and although i love the tea length dresses (b/c i lurv my legs) i'm not feeling them since i want a more traditional feel. so much to think about smile.gif but i'm not going to make a move on this dress til spring, i hope they don't replace it...
sassygrrl
Thanks busties! I'm just concerned about the bust size (pardon the pun) of the whirling turban ones.

Snow and RV, I think I may start at David's Bridal just as an start. I also need to start thinking of bridesmaids dresses. I'm thinking black and white, light blue and chocolate, or purple. All of my bridesmaid range in size.
The bandstand where we're having it, the columns are a light blue.
.
I'm also getting married outside as well.



pollystyrene
I'm glad to hear you had a good experience at David's Bridal, rose. To be clear, they have a lot of very nice dresses (including yours, having seen the pictures)...I guess my negative comments were referring more to the WalMart-esque customer service and way of doing business they seem to have. Of course, you only seem to hear about the problems, but on the wedding message board I post on, people have so many problems with them. It seems to be inconsistent between different locations though. I think they don't have a lot of quality control when it comes to customer service, so one store will be fine and another location will just be disastrous.

I love the light blue and chocolate combination, sassy.
MadameHooch
I LOVE creeping on this thread, my bf and I aren't engaged yet but I have a feeling maybe within the next year....hehe.

I looked at those Whirling Turban dresses and I am IN LOVVEEEE I adore cute vintage-y tea length dresses! Thanks sassy for posting a link to them!

PS You totally should go with the blue and chocolate combo for the bridesmaids, I think those colors are so pretty together!!
snow white
ya, a david's bridal guy called me today b/c i signed up for the free dress give away. my fiance was sitting right there and when i told him i was looking at their dresses and signed up for a free one he "lectured" me on never signing up for "free" stuff. lol, he was so cute. anyway, i fucking hate it when i get phone calls like that. leave me alone! so pushy. u know?

hooch, i'm addicted too. i was never a "OMG WEDDINGS" girl but the dresses and ivitations and favors are all so pretty i am getting reeled in. uh-oh! lol
pollystyrene
Oh yeah, DB is notorious for pestering you and selling your info to other people who will pester you. The whole Wedding Industrial Complex is one big network and it's half the reason I haven't gone to one of those bridal expo shows, because I can't stand telemarketers and junk mail. The other reason being that they're kinda creepy and unnecessary. For the most part, I've been able to find good vendors on my own. I don't need to have them shoving their info down my throat.

Don't know if I posted about it here or not, but a couple months ago, LeBoy's sister won the services of a calligrapher in a charity auction at her school, so she's letting us use it for our invites. I wasn't planning on using a calligrapher (I found about this cool trick where you find a computer font that's nice, but simple, print the addresses on the envelopes with the computer in a really light colored ink. Then go over it with a calligraphy pen so it looks like someone did it by hand!) but if someone's giving it to me for free- hell yes! LeSister finally got the samples of the woman's work and we're supposed to see her tonight to get them from her. I've been waiting to pick out invitations until I see the calligraphy because I want them to sort of match the level of formal-ness that the calligraphy has. I don't want some cute, hippie invites and then find out she only does old-fashioned gothic-style calligraphy- oh the horror!

We finally picked a hotel to book rooms at, so I'm going to try to get my save-the-dates started this weekend. Our wedding is on a holiday weekend, so I want to send them out early and include the hotel info.

I think it's okay to have some ideas in mind before you're officially engaged, hooch (as long as you're not nuts about it)- I think I'm so much more relaxed about the planning since I had a lot of stuff in mind already.
snow white
DB called AGAIN and i just told them i didn't want any more calls from their company. christ almighty.

polly, i looked up hand done calligraphy and it's beautiful! i actually have a calligraphy pen and can do basic lettering but i've never thought to look at professional calligraphy. i didn't really think it exsisted. wow, i love it smile.gif
meadowlark
Long time lurker, minimal poster. I'm happy to be able to join this thread. I've been engaged for a year and we're getting married in April. I think I found my dress this weekend biggrin.gif .
pollystyrene
Welcome, meadowlark!

I got the samples from LeSister and they ranged from "nice handwriting" to Gothic style. I think we're going to go with this one. It's sort of Celtic-y (someone on the wedding message board I post on described it as "Hobbit-y") but I think we'll use it even if our invitations and wedding aren't Irish-themed.
sassygrrl
Polly that reminds me of Victorian a little. Very cool!

I'm not going with DB. Damn!

Is it wrong to not be excited about planning this wedding? I'm half tempted to just buy some immediate family some plane tickets and be done with it. The reception party seems to be the only thing that I'm interested in right now. It seems like it's a gigantic pain in the ass. Not to mention mama drama.



snow white
sassy, i actually think i'm going to get my dress from DB, but warning, if u sign up for their dress give away they will call and call and call! i don't blame u about not being too crazy over planning a wedding, ppl are insane about their weddings now and i think it's way overboard. what kind of wedding r u having?

polly, i like that style, it does look celtic-y which i personally like. smile.gif
the janet
Hello, ladies! I just read thru all the past posts and have enjoyed all the stories and advice! biggrin.gif

I'm just now getting into the wedding planning thick of it. Got engaged on our 1 yr anniversary, July 2. I haven't gotten as wrapped up in all the wedding hoopla as I thought I would. Granted, I have read no less than 7 wedding books, not to mention the magazines. I think it's freaking out the fiancé. But I've assured him that I'm not going to let the wedding take over my life! I already have too much on my plate as it is (i.e., trying to become a certified labor and postpartum doula by Jan 1).

I think we're finally going ring shopping tomorrow...at local pawn shops! I am not interested in a NEW diamond ring (for financial and ethical reasons)...I'm not even sure I want a diamond. I'd be totally happy with a sapphire, his birthstone. I don't even need a ring that costs more than $50. It's just the symbolism of it...plus, a few people have asked to see my ring and it's getting a little tiring telling them I don't have one yet. I'm also not down w/how the guy usually gets shafted so we took an engagement road trip over a month ago: Denver > San Diego > up the coast to Big Sur > Vegas > Denver. It was AMAZING and I'm so glad to have shared the experience with him.

We're by no means wealthy (in fact, I'm drowning in horrible credit card debt...which my parents have offered to pay off as a wedding gift!!) so we lucked out in terms of the cost of the wedding. We live across a loft space that can easily hold a couple hundred people, and our neighbors have offered it up for free! My fiancé's sous chef co-worker and his Whole Foods g.f. have agreed to cater for free (we'd pay for the cost of ingredients/supplies...just not labor). And pretty much all of our other wedding needs are being covered by friends. This thrills me to no end as having our entire wedding "friend-operated" will make it so much more meaningful. I'm also looking into rituals and such to try to incorporate all our guests. I want the evening to be about more than just us...I want everyone to "feel the love," as it were. tongue.gif

There are a few details we're still undecided on, and any input is appreciated!

I'm not sure if we want to get the oh-so-trendy cupcakes or a bunch of smaller cakes. We're not having a dinner – just cocktails and hors d'oeuvres – so a giant cake would seem out of place to me. Cupcakes would require less "stuff" (i.e., plates, silverware)...but they seem kind of...childish? unsure.gif

We're going to have a parent gathering in December and I'd like to buy my wedding dress then, with my mom, sister and future MIL. But I seriously dread the prospect of going to bridal salons. Are there any non-salon shops w/bridal-type dresses I could look into (in the D.C. area)? I know there are tons of websites but I can't try virtual dresses on. dry.gif

Also, I want to make 1,000 paper cranes to hang from the ceiling. Has anyone done this? Is it even possible to make that many alone?? I have 7 months, so about 143/month...
auralpoison
Besides pawn shops, Janet, may I rec a place? Victoriana Jewelry. It's off 16th & Larimer & you can find really unique stuff there at really good prices. My bf got me an utterly fabulous ring there.
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