I know that this thread hasn't been posted in, in a while but I feel like venting nonetheless and this seems like a relatively safe place to do it.
The other night we ran into one of Mr. Skan's friends in the grocery store. He & his girlfriend had just had a baby boy, which they had with them. Mr. Skan's friend was going on briefly how awesome being a father was, ect. I just aww'd at the baby and quickly moved on.
When we got in the car Mr. Skan made a comment about how it seemed like all his friends were having kids. I simply replied "Yeah, that's sourta what people our age tend to do I guess."
We got to talking about having children and I let a bit of my emotion out about the fact that having children wasn't going to be easy for us due to my stupid body. Oh yeah, not to mention we have been anything but safe these years together..but gee...nothing has happened. If I was one of my rapidly producing friends right now at this rate I would have 4-5 children.
I know it's going to be a struggle to have a child and at times I'm not sure if I'm prepared to deal with it. It's rather scary. I wanted to have at least one child if not 2 by the time I was 30. There's a good chance that won't happen.
There is also a good chance that we won't be able to conceive w/o medical intervention. You know, I am totally grateful for all the advances in technology these days, but still it's not the way I imagine having my children.
Fertility treatments, IVF, adoption, ect ect....I'm sure I'll have children one day. Just not as soon as I hoped...just not as I planned probably.
It's frusturating and really hurts sometimes.
But what can you do?
Last night I had a dream that we had twins. It was like the most awesome dream ever heh..but right now that's all children are...a dream.