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doodlebug
I think nowadays people are taught that being "self-aware" is about a superficial sort of self-awareness. In western society, we aren't taught to become thoughtful adults anymore - we are just conditioned to believe that we deserve whatever we want and that we are the most important people in our universe. It's hard to find your moral compass in a world that rewards underhanded behaviour, selfishness, hypocrisy, and shallow forms of "self-improvement." It takes a certain fearlessness to face your inner self, and if people are encouraged to do anything BUT that, then their inner self IS the same person they were in high school.

/rant
lilacwine13
Word, doodle and craztcatlady.

I remember being in high school and wishing that my friends and peers would simply grow up and act like adults. Little did I know that I would be wishing the same thing ten years later (and of myself sometimes sad.gif ).
ginger_kitty
Yeah I guess some people really never grow up...... sad.gif
pho#1
i work at a plant nursery where the co-owner and majority of employees are women. two of us where merrily working outside one day, when this old man comes along and says, "so they let you women's libbers work here now? how times have changed." or something to that effect.
ummm, yeah. rolleyes.gif
doodlebug
pho! WTF!? WTF would you even say to that? Wow.

That reminds me of this time I was visiting my mom, and I fixed her wobbly dining table.

My grandfather (a retired trade carpenter, around 85 at the time) came over for tea. After learning of my repairs, he grasped the edge of the table and shook it hard a few times. "Huh," he said. "Pretty good for a woman."

"Pretty good for anyone," I shot back.

He just smiled (at the table, not at me), rolled his shoulder, and said, "Huh."
pho#1
Haha! i know it's like, newsflash!! WE CAN VOTE NOW TOO!!
treehugger
ohhh, boy, do I have some stories like those.....

Mainly it's men working in offices doing professional-ish type jobs who try to tell me how to repair their stuff. It's like, if you know how to do it why are you calling ME?

Or it's men who say, (when I'm close to high voltage wiring) "be careful around that, honey, those wires will BITE you".

Or it's people who look at each other when they see me carrying my toolbag and say "now I've seen it ALL".

Or the building manager who doesn't understand why his A/C coil keeps icing up and insists that I don't actually need to fix it, the people just need to turn it off periodicially. (oh, shoot, THAT'S where I left that wrench yesterday)

It is getting better though. I'm seeing more and more men who aren't afraid to look "dumb" and are freely willing to ask me questions about how their stuff works, and to TRUST me that I know what I'm doing. I'm grateful for those jobs.
bustygirl
Ehh. Men will get it or they won't. Won't change us from being able to do the same things they can do (or in the case of astronauts, sometimes better), so fuck it.

And men who still call women 'libbers' will die off eventually. Probably from good old-fashioned congestive heart failure. wink.gif
doodlebug
I think the phrase, "Yeah, and women can vote now, too!" is about to become my new favourite comeback.

I hate the way some tech guys treat me. It's improved a lot over the last number of years, but I've been working with computers and building websites for a long time, and while it's been fun to shut down assholes by spouting technical jargon, it's still been annoying. The younger ones are usually sooooo much better.

Ditto when I go to a hardware store. The older guys (not all, but enough) can be very condescending when explaining something after I've asked for help or advice, but most of the younger guys are terrific.

busty is right...we just need to wait for the old ones to die off. smile.gif
chibi
Hi there,

I've lurked for a while but am surfacing now to post about something that happened today. I stopped at the corner store where my husband usually gets the paper to ask them to put a copy by for me to get daily as he's out of town this week. The shop guy asked who my husband was, then said "really, he told me he wasn't married!". I said " how interesting" and he was very adamant that this was so. He then proceeded to unload details about my husband from previous conversations as though to confirm that oh yes, he had the right guy.

I knw my husband wouldn't have said such a thing, but what gets me, is, even if it were true, how could it be anything other than a big ole slice of gratuitous nastiness to tell me so? Knowing this has not kept me from feeling upset.

soory for the long post
*back to lurking*
zora
This is probably my favorite take on the subject of men treating women like we're ignorant of "manly-type" things.
http://queenofwands.net/d/20051109.html
doodlebug
Who in the fuck gave Howie Mandel an hour long fucking game show?

That is my cob of the day.

(That's a good one, zora. BTW, every time I see your pic, I think Laurie Anderson is a bustie.)
anna k
People who are so used to the names of their preprogrammed names in their cell phone that they get weirded out if an unfamiliar number or - gasp! - no name appears on the screen. I prefer to be surprised. I'm also going to buy an address book so I can remember people's numbers instead of just clicking on their name on the phone.
xexyz
cob: My poor feet. Why are all shoes so mean to my poor feet?!?! sad.gif
crazyoldcatlady
see, anna, i'm the other way around. i have a short list of people that i refuse to acknowledge are alive, let alone take their calls.

if an unknown or private number comes up, you're going straight to voicemail.
zora
Doodle, I wish Laurie Anderson was a bustie. That would make my year.
doodlebug
biggrin.gif --> zora

I never answer my phone. Never. And if you don't leave a voice mail, don't get bent out of shape that you can never reach me. But I don't have caller ID, so tomorrow I am determined to suck it up and go for it. Even my mother has caller ID for pete's sake. (Of course, I convinced her to get it, so that she wouldn't have to talk to her alcohol and psychiatric med mixing sister unless she wanted to.)

cob: people who mix alcohol and psychiatric meds. Hello? You sound like a raving lunatic when you talk. About anything.

cob: I'm stuck living in Canada with a corporate telephone monopoly, and that I have no choice but to pay $8 CAD a month just for caller ID.

cob: private corporate monoplies. I didn't mind corporate monopolies when they were government-owned and operated (Crown corporations)...ironically, they were less expensive and better operated. But this business of private corporate monopolies with bad service and pricey rates is sickening....AND it makes no sense! Crown corporations were cash cows for the government! Selling them off, or selling off parts of them, is only about lining the pockets of those who donate mega-bucks to neo-con political campaigns.

cob: the sickening turn to the right my beloved Canada has taken.
dusty
I never ever answer my home phone unless I know who it is. But then I only ever turn on my cell when I might be expecting a call, so I always know who it is.
mandolyn
"i have a short list of people that i refuse to acknowledge are alive, let alone take their calls."

catlady, i so heart you. laugh.gif

my cell ringtone is barenaked ladies' call and answer. so my phone rings with them singing, "if you call, i will answer ..." which is typical mandi twisted irony, since i'm the Queen of Screen. hee.
pollystyrene
Caller ID will change your life doodle. It's a wonderful, wonderful invention. But $8/month (Canadian or otherwise)? That's a bit steep! It will be worth it though. Unless I'm expecting an unexpected call (like someone I know calling from an unfamiliar number) I don't answer my cell or home phone. Like you, Doodle, I say if they don't leave a message, they have no right to bitch.
doodlebug
Well, turns out the first month is free....I just signed up. Now I actually have to go buy a caller ID phone! (I really need a new cordless phone anyway.)

My BFF's cell phone ring is a clucking chicken...and it was cute for the first year. But now? Not so much.

cob: I'm going to be spending my long weekend sorting through financial paper work for the Centre. But I'm bringing everything home so I can do it here.
lilacwine13
I'm like anna in that I don't screen my calls and will answer no matter what. There are several people in my life that call from several different numbers (work, cell, etc.), so if I get a number that's unfamilar it might be someone I know trying to get a hold of myself or AZ Guy (my cell doubles as our house phone because we really don't need one). Also, I like to keep the list of programmed numbers in my phone short, so most of the time the number that comes up isn't attached to a name anyway.
dusty
I loves me some caller ID!

OMG. Talk on your cell, or jay walk, don't try to do both. How many times do I see pedestrians wandering across an intersection on a red light, talking on their phone oblivious to the cars honking at them?
anna k
I hate seeing people walking and talking on their cells a lot. I feel like an old lady yelling at teens for listening to their walkmans/i-Pods too loudly.
sassygrrl
OMG

Almost got hit twice today(not on my cell phone!) by people driving in their cars, and not paying attention while driving. Really should be outlawed in all states, or at least hands free when you're driving. Hello, I have the right away when the light is red, and there is a walking signal peoples!!!
mornington
cob: people who cannot write scientific papers. university students with no grasp of actual writing skill. how frequently the two run together. i want to scream and break out the red pen teacher stylee. I don't want to put my name to it because I'll get a bad mark. but I'm too lazy to re-write it and I don't want to patronise.
dusty
Caller explaining to me about the zip+4 format of zip codes. Umm, ya, and where exactly do you think I have been hanging out for the last twenty-five years?
pherber
Lolz @ the private corporate monopolies!

I've seethed with anger about our bollocks Telecom, but their service is nothing compared to the complete insanity that is the Deutsche Post! mad.gif
They happen to be my bank. (Postbank- don't laugh, if you're poor they're the only ones who'll accept you as a customer) So I'm writing to them to send me bank transferral forms so I can pay my bills. They said it takes about a week, but after four weeks I wrote again, and then again... this is 10 weeks ago, so I'm asking them what I have to do to get these forms. Drop to my knees and beg?
They told me to just write again and again and again! Like I haven't done that already!
mad.gif
The reason for this delay is obvious, because as long as I don't have these forms, I have to pay in cash into the others accounts, which costs a fee of 7 Euros each, which makes 35 Euros for all my bills every month!

And if you live in the forth floor they will just NOT deliver a parcel, (which costs a fortune of course!) because they're too lazy to climb all the stairs! You can sit at home for 8 hours, waiting for your parcel, just to find a note in your letter box saying "sorry, but you weren't home" If you complain and tell them in the post-office, that you were at home waiting they'll say "You probably didn't hear the bell ringing!" mad.gif

Oh, and hospitals are privatised these days: A while ago, I sat in an emergency room for six hours before I got to see a doctor. They said it's weekend, noone works. mellow.gif

raisingirl
I fucking hate hate HAAAAAATE cell phone conversations. My tolerance for it has gone down considerably over time. Don't call me while you're on your way home or on your way to work or on your way to run errands or whatever. I don't care how fucking busy and harried your life is or how poorly managed it is so that the only time you have to talk on the phone is when you're behind the wheel sitting in traffic. I can hear how distracted you are when you're talking on the phone with me -- AS YOU SHOULD BE IF YOU ARE DRIVING -- and it just makes for a really unsatisfying and disjointed conversation. What's the fucking point? Hang up and drive, call me when you get home (in once piece), and stop pissing me off with your foolish actions.
sybarite
Fucking neighbour blasting his TV. I can hear the soaps word for word from next door. He does this during the day too; some of us have to work for a living, even if it is from home sometimes. Asshole.

He drinks like a fish, which is why I won't go over and complain. For a while he used to knock on our door at about 11pm, drunk out of his mind and wanting to chat. That's when he wasn't playing Irish showband music at 1am. I should feel sorry for him but his freakish activities are distracting during the day and have kept us awake at night. Grrr!

Mornington, it is terrifying how many people at uni can't string a sentence together to save their lives. I hear you.

Um, raisin, I walk and talk fairly frequently. I don't actually conduct counter transactions whilst on the phone though...
maddy29
love this thread!

can't stand litterers-especially smokers who throw their butts on the ground. wtf? the earth is not your personal ashtray, stinkass!

driving while on cell phone-if it's a brief call, fine, and if you are being careful, fine. but i've seen sooo many people fly through red lights almost killing people, or even better talking on their cell and smoking at the same time, no hands free for the wheel.

people talking loudly on their cell phones on the bus or at a busstop or anywhere i can't get away from you. on the bus-it's sooo inappropriate to talk so loudly that everyone can hear your stupid conversation. this woman behind me talked for the entire 45 minute ride, right behind me, very loudly. grrrrrrr

i soo agree raisingirl- don't call someone right when youg et on the bus, or when you're at the dunkin donuts drive through. one of my friends will call me while she's with someone else and then talk to them and me, as if i can tell who she's talking to....

when you are out to lunch with a friend that you made plans with, they should NOT answer their cell phone! they shouldn't even realy have it on, or at least put it on vibrate. the same friend answers EVERY call and it's totally disruptive to our conversation. i think it's hella rude!

dude, i'm on a roll here...

pedestrians who cross in front of traffic on a main road when the cars have a green light. again, wtf? you are sooo special that all of the cars should stop for you? you can't wait 45 seconds until the walk sign comes on? grrrrrrrr. i watch this every day at my bus stop and it makes me nuts! just wait your turn people!

the sexeee women on deal or no deal. isn't it a "family show?" then why do you have 50 skimpily clad WOMEN on stage-they are just props. where are the men in their tight pants and no shirt?

people who get annoyed that i never answer my cell phone. well, screw you, that's what voicemail is for. they act like i'm purposely screening (well, i am) but also, just because i have a cell phone doesn't mean it's attached to my ear, and doesn't mean that i'm available all the time to talk. so don't be all "you never answer! how come you didn't answer???" um, cause i was doing something else, or i didn't want to talk to you. i hate how people feel entitled to my time.

wooeeeee! i love this thread.
sybarite
I agree that people who talk loudly on their phones on public transport are asshats (and driving, but I don't drive so it doesn't occur to me). It's annoying and everyone can hear their business. A low-budget airline in Europe plans to lift the ban on cellphones next year. Yikes.
doodlebug
cob: that a search for Ugly Betty on p2p turns up 8 results titled "salma_hayek_boobs." *le sigh*

anti-cob: caller ID rocks my universe.
wombat
I can easily not answer a phone -- but now I HAVE TO ANSWER, because: I'm looking for a job, I'm registered with an agent, and Batman's dad has been sick.

It is just disgusting how many people think they can just call up in the day and bother people, telemarketing, surveys, will you come let me in the building (no!) and the like. It goes along with daytime TV in having total contempt for WOMEN staying home.

I mean, I am trying to do work related to my field that requires hella lot of brain cells and concentration, web art and navigation and styles, etc. which is like programming logic plus art. I don't need to be spoken to like I'm some kind of servile idiot-- and I'm sure women who stay home to take care of housework and children, like my mom did, are not idiots either -- yes, I'm just an empty vessel that wants to buy food, buy telemarketing crap, serve people in some way, and gossip -- feel free to interrupt me!
chachaheels
Oooh, I know! The only people who call my home phone during the day are telemarketers, and they always seem to call in clusters, at around 3pm or so, and then again around 6pm. If I get a call at 8pm I know it's someone else who wants to sell me something too.

So I just screen my calls. Telemarketers will never leave a message, they always hang up. If I didn't do this, I'd definitely need caller ID on my home line, as it keeps the cost of my cell phone down considerably!
doodlebug
I did the call-screening (via voicemail) for years, but after awhile, people started getting frustrated. Plus now that we're shutting down the Centre, I'm having to give out my home number, so caller ID just became an essential!

One thing that's making me a bit pissy: If I am an employee of an organization that has only ever operated during weekday daylight hours, and I give you my home number so we can deal with something work-related while the organization is in flux....DON'T call me at home on the weekend! WTF is wrong with you? Just b/c YOU can't get your schedule together to call me during the week doesn't mean *I* have to suck it up and be available to you on the weekend! Dipshit.
pepper
i always pick the phone up. always. if i don't want to talk to the person on the other end i just tell them it's not a good time. that seems more honest to me than screening somehow. and if it's a telemarketer you can ask to be removed from their phone list and they do it. it's a good way to keep your number from being passed around from company to company. you can register for no call/no mail with the canadian marketing association as well. you have to renew every three years but it really cuts down on calls.

cob ~ building managers who can't be fucked to replace burned out light bulbs in the elevator, n/m the bigger stuff. i don't like that woman at all. lazy beotch.
hoosierman78
Along the line of the Canadian no call/no mail list, you can also sign up for no call lists in many states (can't recall if there is a federal registry or not). Usually takes a month to fully kick in, but it's amazing how much the crap calls decrease. Blissful silence from the phone while eating dinner was something I had almost forgotten could exist!

cob: people that think their time is more valuable than everyone else's. Example, today at lunch I had a chiropractor appt. Given that it is Thanksgiving week, and my chiropractor is, like many others, enjoying a 4 day weekend this week, the office is a bit busy with people getting their treatments. I understand this, sign out for an extended lunch which I will make up after work today. Well, this obviously more important than everyone else guy finds out that it's going to take longer than the usual 20-25 minutes starts throwing a shit fit, about how he has to get back to his office and he has to have at least 30 minutes to eat lunch when he's done, etc. The receptionist apologized for the delay, but the doc was doing the best he could do to ensure that everyone received their treatments/adjustments for the week, and since it was a short week, that meant more people squeezed in to each day.

Well apparently, this guy called in about an hour before he got there and asked to be squeezed in, since he just found out they wouldn't be open on Friday. The receptionist, in a very polite, but firm voice, told the guy that he could do one of two things: he could wait like the rest of us or he could consider calling in more than an hour before he wanted to be seen. He pissed and moaned a little more and grumbled to himself as he stormed out the door. (sorry so long)
raisingirl
Ugh! What the hell good is there in having gigantic fluffy bath towels when they are too thick to air-dry before the next shower A FULL 26 HOURS LATER?! Sheesh.
dusty
Air dry towels? How will they get fluffy?

It is my prerogative to decide who to let into my apartment, whether it be in the flesh or electronically.
raisingirl
Dusty, they're fluffy after I've washed them, but air-drying them between each use.

In theory, big thick towels are a good idea; in practice, not so much a good idea.
wombat
I like to get cheap towels!!

The fancy fluffy ones are NOT SUPPPOSED TO BE DRIED IN A HOOTTTTTT DRYER and therefore, as raisingirl says, they are irritatingly damp forever and might harbor bacteria.

I like the ones that are more of a beach towel like thickness, and since I bought them cheap anyway, I don't care if they self-destruct into clouds of lint and I make them nice and hot and dry and delicious in the hot dryers.

I mean, it seriously shortens their lives ... but too bad.

BWAAAHAHAHAHAA -- I am a towel sadist!
doodlebug
Ah...I live in the desert, where even wet jeans will air dry in a mere four to six hours.

Yeah, my desire for caller ID is a long-standing issue that has nothing to do with telemarketers...I started out with an unlisted number, but I've been so heavily involved in the community and in politics that wayyy too many people feel free to call me about work stuff any old time, and also I like to be warned when the media (or my alcoholic aunt) is calling. Caller ID is a vast improvement, b/c now I can pick up when it's someone I want to talk to, instead of making people like my ma and my BFF go thru to voice mail!
lucizoe
Cob - My mother. My mother-in-law. Oh, sheesh.

Anticob - My new gram-in-law who is every bit the fabulous woman my grandma was not. If ever there was a reason for caller ID...

Extra anti-cob - having our secular non-christmas in brooklyn instead of at parents' house

wombat
I have caller ID, but:

Phone is tucked in a bit in Grampa's cubby desk.

I set it to ring only four times before VM, so I have to make a mad dash to GET IT by the third ring if I'm going to get it at all.

I can't possibly have all the "possible health care numbers for Bob's Dad" and" possible employer ad on internet" phone numbers memorized, esp. within split seconds of reading them!
sybarite
Taxi companies that will only take my booking if it's a corporate account.

Design shop that will only give me a cardboard gift box if I buy 4 items instead of 2.

I am going to try and buy all my xmas presents from other countries/sources this year, just to boycott the rampant unchecked celebrated greed that fuels this place.
doodlebug
Cob: I am fucking FREEZING!!!!!!

Who builds these buidlings with 12 foot high ceilings and the heat vents are up on the ceiling?? WTF???????? I am sitting at my desk, literally shivering and shaking, with teeth chattering!!!!!
mornington
recorded delivery couriers. I've been sitting in the house all day waiting for this bloody delivery for the second day in a row. WHERE THE FUCK IS MY PARCEL?

and don't tell me the couldn't find the street. it's there. in the atlas. twunts

edit: being on hold

and discovering they put a "W" in my postcode where there is no W, has never been a W, and being FUCKING UNHELPFUL ABOUT IT
edna
This is a pretty minor cob, but still: Mail order companies that send me the same fucking catalog at least once a month with a different cover. All the same shit, nothing new, just more paper to recycle. If I love a certain catalog, I do not want a new copy until there are some new items in it.
ginger_kitty
Cob: Rude drivers!! It's a constant never ending battle! My alley is kind of tight so only one car can go down at a time. Well the other day some a-hole sees me coming down the alley and decides to pull out towards me. Then instead of just backing back into the parking lot he pulled out of, points at me to pull off into my neighbors snowy yard. There is wicked drop off between the paved alley and my nieghbors yard, not to mention a bunch of snow, so I probably would have gotten stuck. So I pointed at him to back up. Instead of backing into the lot, he just backed up and me pull into the lot around him. I was so mad!!

P.S. Mornington, I hate being put on hold!!! It's a complete waste of cell phone minutes!
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