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erinjane
Yeah, if it happens again that we hang out and have a good time and nothing happens again, I probably will call him on it. I'm the type of person that wants answers so rather than just leave it alone I usually put myself out there and ask whats up.
zoya
erinjane - I would say to call him on it, but don't just ask him what's up.. that's kinda putting the ball in his court. I'd TELL him how it makes YOU feel when he does that. Like tell him "we hang out, have a great time, talk about doing things, and then it just doesn't happen. It's confusing for me, because we clearly like hanging out, but I'm not down with you just not responding when I suggest we do something." you could even add something about you feeling really disrespected when he does that if you want. then sit back and listen to what he has to say. I've found that when you state what YOU feel and just keep it mellow and simple, the guy pretty much HAS to respond. And they either shit or get off the pot. Questions back guys into a corner. Statements about how YOU feel make them have to come forward and answer. The trick is to LISTEN to their response without any expectations. and if it seems like he is making excuses you don't like, then just tell him that's not acceptable as an exuse. Don't get in a fight with him, just listen and be really laid back about it. he'll tell you everything you need to know about the situation by his response if you just sit back and listen without judgement and don't get into some huge discussion about it.

That said, I'm pretty bad about that type of communication, but I know its a good way to go about it, (I've even had guy friends tell me that that is a great way to talk to a guy) and I'm getting better - I've found that pretty much across the board, whenever I've taken responsibility for my feelings, and telling a guy how his actions / or the situaton is making me feel (good or bad) they're like "woah." You might not get the response you want, but I guarantee you you will make an impression on the guy by being a girl who in a level headed, non threatening, non needy way states her needs. And that will just help you get what you need without getting dragged on and on.

anyway, just my .02 cents worth..

stargazer
(((candy))) so sorry.

erinjane, um, i'm cautious of guys who use the term "meet up" and/or "hangout." it sounds like he just wants to be friends. it sounds like it is just casual. not to sound harsh. but, you never know about things. don't put all of your eggs in one basket. get yourself out there.

as for me, i facilitate between being frustrated and being ok with being single. but, i don't think i'm really ok. i think i just tell myself that. argh.
erinjane
Well I just found out he's been painting his sisters house for the last two weekends (inside and out) so that's why he hasn't been around.

I'm pretty good at reading people so I know he's interested. Keep in mind stargazer, what I was writing isn't direct quotes from him. I wouldn't say all my eggs are in one basket, I'm waiting to see where this is going because frankly, there's no one else on the horizon who holds any interest for me, and there hasn't been in over a year. I've got the time. If it goes no where I won't be too down, but I would like to know at some point if it is going somewhere.

I too go back and forth between being frustrated and being ok. Now I'm getting back into class so if nothing comes of this current interest, I'll probably stay single for another year. I think I'm still cool with that...maybe.
snow white
QUOTE(erinjane @ Sep 2 2007, 01:01 PM) *
I too go back and forth between being frustrated and being ok. Now I'm getting back into class so if nothing comes of this current interest, I'll probably stay single for another year. I think I'm still cool with that...maybe.



wow, you said it.

i keep having dreams about ex-bfs and potencial bfs i never actually dated but could have (i didn't date them for a reason). does this happen to anyone else? i find it a little weird but not totally unpleasant.
erinjane
Nah, mostly I dream about zombies. tongue.gif
samiam
Ok, i have the most bizarre situation to bounce off you ladies.

Late Wednesday night, at about 3am, the phone rang. I let it ring, but whoever it was did not want to leave a message so i started to think that it was an emergency and i answered. It wasn't an emergency. It was a guy named Greg, and after some initial confusion (it was 3 am!) I realized that he was an old friend from a town I used to live in, whom I had run into twice in the last month. He affirmed this. He went on to tell me that he had been thinking about me since we saw eachother, and got a little sexy. Well, I am single, sexually pretty open, and have always been a little attracted to this guy. The phone sex was incredible. It was great the next night as well, but I noticed that the conversation was staying distinctly away from anything personal about him. He was calling me from a friend's house, and claimed that his phone had gotten ruined and he did not have a number I could reach him at. A few other things were not jiving; like, if he lived just up the hill from me, why not just drive the 40 miles and take me out for a drink? Then he mentioned that he had a motorcycle, which seemed really odd. He was calling when he said he would, and the calls were sweet and sexy and really fun. Yesterday morning I mentioned that I knew almost nothing about him, and he claimed that he had to go and we made a call date for 11 pm. He called, and after telling me how wonderful, sweet and smart I was, he assured me that he was going to be completely honest. We started with where he grew up, which still made sense. I asked if he had any siblings. He does, a brother less than 2 years older than him who has been a cop for over 20 years. What? Wait, the Greg I know is about 29, a fact he had confirmed to me the other night. He said he was giong to be honest. He's 42. Ok. Maybe he looks young, right? I asked where he is living right now, and he admits that he does not live in the mountain town I thought he did. He lives in the Bay Area. Huh? Earlier in the conversation he had mentioned that he had visited his mother in a town near San Francisco, which made little sense to me.

Then he got really honest. I was shocked, and rather than hang up, simply asked who the hell he was. He lives in the Bay. He's 42. He's named Greg, but he is not who i thought, and whom he allowed me to think, he was. He had RANDOMLY picked my name out of a phone book and called me. He was staying/working at a friend's near here when he did it. I kept talking to him. He apologized and told me all about himself. What he claims to look like sounds right... If I choose, I could meet him next weekend when i am in his neck of the woods for an event, anyway.

I can't decide if this is an excellent adventure or a crazy stalker situation in the making. I know it's crazy to even talk to him, but I have the daredevil gene and this could be a lot of fun. I mean, the right thing to do is never take a call again and make sure to keep his name and phone number is in a safe place (he gave me his number last night) in case I am found dismembered in the desert. On the other hand, why not have some sort of sordid affair with a relative stranger? I mean, if I am actually attracted to him.

I know that I am crazy. I just needed to talk about this somewhere, and this seems like a good venue. I am embarassed about the whole thing, really. I really thought that it was the other guy, the one I know. I am a fool.
samiam
Ok, i have the most bizarre situation to bounce off you ladies.

Late Wednesday night, at about 3am, the phone rang. I let it ring, but whoever it was did not want to leave a message so i started to think that it was an emergency and i answered. It wasn't an emergency. It was a guy named Greg, and after some initial confusion (it was 3 am!) I realized that he was an old friend from a town I used to live in, whom I had run into twice in the last month. He affirmed this. He went on to tell me that he had been thinking about me since we saw eachother, and got a little sexy. Well, I am single, sexually pretty open, and have always been a little attracted to this guy. The phone sex was incredible. It was great the next night as well, but I noticed that the conversation was staying distinctly away from anything personal about him. He was calling me from a friend's house, and claimed that his phone had gotten ruined and he did not have a number I could reach him at. A few other things were not jiving; like, if he lived just up the hill from me, why not just drive the 40 miles and take me out for a drink? Then he mentioned that he had a motorcycle, which seemed really odd. He was calling when he said he would, and the calls were sweet and sexy and really fun. Yesterday morning I mentioned that I knew almost nothing about him, and he claimed that he had to go and we made a call date for 11 pm. He called, and after telling me how wonderful, sweet and smart I was, he assured me that he was going to be completely honest. We started with where he grew up, which still made sense. I asked if he had any siblings. He does, a brother less than 2 years older than him who has been a cop for over 20 years. What? Wait, the Greg I know is about 29, a fact he had confirmed to me the other night. He said he was giong to be honest. He's 42. Ok. Maybe he looks young, right? I asked where he is living right now, and he admits that he does not live in the mountain town I thought he did. He lives in the Bay Area. Huh? Earlier in the conversation he had mentioned that he had visited his mother in a town near San Francisco, which made little sense to me.

Then he got really honest. I was shocked, and rather than hang up, simply asked who the hell he was. He lives in the Bay. He's 42. He's named Greg, but he is not who i thought, and whom he allowed me to think, he was. He had RANDOMLY picked my name out of a phone book and called me. He was staying/working at a friend's near here when he did it. I kept talking to him. He apologized and told me all about himself. What he claims to look like sounds right... If I choose, I could meet him next weekend when i am in his neck of the woods for an event, anyway.

I can't decide if this is an excellent adventure or a crazy stalker situation in the making. I know it's crazy to even talk to him, but I have the daredevil gene and this could be a lot of fun. I mean, the right thing to do is never take a call again and make sure to keep his name and phone number is in a safe place (he gave me his number last night) in case I am found dismembered in the desert. On the other hand, why not have some sort of sordid affair with a relative stranger? I mean, if I am actually attracted to him.

I know that I am crazy. I just needed to talk about this somewhere, and this seems like a good venue. I am embarassed about the whole thing, really. I really thought that it was the other guy, the one I know. I am a fool.
opossum78
samiam - whoa. on the one hand...that's totally hot. on the other hand, there is definitely the dismemberment in the desert to think about.

what i find so peculiar about this is that for a guy to randomly pick your name out of a book, he sure does have a lot in common with the greg you think he is. which leads me to suspect that he is indeed stalking you and knows a thing or two about you and your life. enough to be dangerous, you know?

if you're dying to meet this guy - even if it's out of morbid curiosity - i'd take a friend (or two) along with me and insist upon meeting in a crowded place during daylight hours!

godspeed...! blink.gif
crazyoldcatlady
run, sam.
snow white
yeah, sam, that's just too weird.

"what i find so peculiar about this is that for a guy to randomly pick your name out of a book, he sure does have a lot in common with the greg you think he is. "

at the very least this guy is a very good liar... unsure.gif
samiam
Ok, he called my land line three times last night because I never picked up, and my cell each time after calling the land line. he just called again about a minute ago. I have to admit that I am completely freaked out about this. Whenever I think about it, which is almost constantly, my stomach does flip-flops and my legs get tingly. It's either true love, or abject horror. I have told no one about this beside this thread. I am so humiliated. I keep asking myself why I would even be interested at all, and whether or not this is an exercise in my own self-worth, or a really sexy adventure Anais Nin would embrace, so why not me? As superficial as it sounds, not knowing what he looks like makes it harder. At least he lives 4 hours away. I keep coming home and expecting a stranger on my doorstep, which is a little creepy. Am I being melodramatic? What do i say to him? I feel like avoiding his calls may make it worse, but talkign to him only eggs him on.

Wierd.
candycane_girl
Okay, sam, seriously do not go near that guy! He sounds fucking nuts! I'm sorry, I know that's harsh but it's just...I've done some slightly crazy things but never anything that crazy. I mean, he just chose your name out of a phone book? What? What if he didn't and he's actually a crazy stalker guy? It just doesn't sound right.


So...yeah, nothing is happening for me so far. However, it's only been the first day of school. So far I've been talking to girls. I think most of the guys in my program are a bit young for me (I'm 22 so I'm a bit older than most of the students) but I'm just hoping that somehow I'll meet some guys. The one upside to uni so far is that unlike college a lot of the classes are mixed with people from different programs. Unlike in college where I just saw the same people day after day after day.

There's some program greeting party this week so I'm going to go to that. I'm just trying to be as social as possible, it's especially hard since I'm so horribly shy and I've only met about two people in my program so far.
opossum78
sam - i'm no longer on the fence about this. it's no longer hot. run for the hills! trust your tingly gut on this one!
samiam
Do I call him/answer the phone and tell him I am not interested? Or do I just keep ignoring him? I am sorry that I am so needy on this one. This is new and strange.
candycane_girl
The next time he calls, pick it up and tell him that you are no longer interested and tell him to stop calling. Be firm!
erinjane
Candycane, I'm hoping there'll be some nice eye candy in my socio class tonight, but I'm a women's studies major, so I have virtually no guys in most of my classes.
greenbean
Wow, I haven't been here for awhile..thats truly strange Samiam. I can understand the initial intrigue, but it sounds pretty shady. Any new developments?

Ok, so I'm at that point in my life where I'm getting pity for being single. What gives? Last year everyone was telling me how it was a good thing. "You can focus on your career!" and "You get to travel alone, free as a bird!" and "How fun, you get to go on dates!" they all said. Yet in the past few weeks I've heard this: "You aren't seeing anyone? Jeeze, I couldn't do it. I hate being single." (one of my guy friends who is married) and "Well, you still have time" (my mom, after learning 3 of my friends are getting married this year. And no, that statement was not a response to any type of expressed jealousy on my part) and my personal favorite, "Oh, well thats ok. (unconvincingly) Its better to be ALONE then with someone who isnt special..I mean..not that you're alone..you have friends, right?" (older friend of my parents whose daughters are my age and married).

UGH!!!

Side-note, is it pathetic that I'm listening to Gordon Brown on NPR right now and its making me all tingly?
snow white
greenbean, one of my friends can be pretty nasty about my single-ness too. which is probably the reason why i haven't talked to her in about a week... i just get sick of the attitude, but that's for another thread.

sam, i am so glad you're not going to meet up w/ that guy. i can understand the initial interest/attraction, everyone loves a good adventure, but yeah, that got creepy pretty quick which is a good thing. at least you didn't sucked into a weird situation.

anyway, i just started school, since i'm going for my LPN the girl to guy ratio in the class room, is well, there's 3 whole guys in the class-lol, which is awesome to see guys in nursing, but no one i'm interested in. i'm glad to hear you're putting yourself out there, candy, b/c i need to do that too. being with the same people for 6 hrs a day for the next 10 months freaks me out a little bit! but, i'll get through it.

so the weekend begins & i'm ready for a glass of wine, cheers busties!
samiam
Update -- "Greg" called the other night three times and i finally answered. I was civil. Explained how I was a little freaked out, dropped a few hints about being afraid to find him in my driveway when I get home and that a few of my male friends know about him,a nd let him know that I needed a few days to think. He has not called since. It's less scary this way, and I feel better having spoken to him rather than just blowing him off. Still, creepy.

In other news, there is activity on the dating front - yay! Went out for dinner last night with a guy i met over the weekend who is, shall we say, less experienced than I? Without getting graphic, he has only been with 4 women, me being one of them (it was a crazy, drunken move -- fully protected, but drunken -- on friday) and I was the first non-virgin. He's 28! I feel like I have corrupted him! Oh well\. Maybe it's about time!
candycane_girl
Gah, I feel so frustrated! Duh, that's why I'm here. But really, yes I've been meeting people in the program but the thing is that I'm 22 and I'm in first year. So basically almost all the guys I'm meeting are 17 or 18.

I just don't know where to meet guys that are my age (almost 23). Some people seem to just meet people on their own when they go out but that just doesn't happen to me. I don't understand it, I hate that I've met guys online (and later met them in real life) who are attracted to me and would date me and yet I can't seem to meet guys in real life.

sam, good for you for telling that guy how you were feeling. Oh, and very good for telling him that you have guy friends who know the situation!
How did you meet the other guy? Oh, and there's nothing wrong with a little corruption. tongue.gif
snow white
i've tried on-line dating. maybe tried isn't the right word really... i like to make profiles and check other profiles out, i have a few internet friendships made from personal sites which at times include phone calls but i find the concept so bizarre i have a hard time actually meeting internet ppl in real life (does that make any sense?). i have gone on a date w/ someone from myspace. it was a total impulse thing, we sent a few messages back and forth and next thing i know we've made plans to meet up. obviously it didn't work out romantically. but candy, if it's easier to meet guys on-line why not keep a profile up and see what happens (along w/ meeting guys IRL too). that's my plan of attack now. i have an on-line personal on yahoo (non-searchable) and there seems to be a few cute guys on there, i guess i'll send them a message and see how it goes.

sam, congrats on a good date smile.gif at first i thought you ment you had been with one of his 4 women! wow, lol. but i'm glad to hear you had a good time.
xexyz
I started kind of flirting with a woman at work, but I'm naturally hesitant to pursue it any farther than that. I'm just getting to the point where it seems that there aren't any single women out there at all! unsure.gif
candycane_girl
snow white, it's just a bit different. I'm not into the whole profile thing, it's just that I started a livejournal account and ended up meeting a lot of guys through it. There was really only one guy that I met off of it and I ended up meeting up with him in New York and from that I met a few of his friends. I get along with all of them, had great experiences with them and it just sucks because they're so far from me!

It just feels like the only guys I've met who actually find me attractive live in a whole other country! I don't know what the deal is.
snow white
haha, oooh my god, my personals profile sucks. i hope i meet someone, a bunch of guys just checked it out but i have only 1 message. god, maybe i shouldn't write anything in it. dry.gif


QUOTE(xexyz @ Sep 8 2007, 12:38 AM) *
I started kind of flirting with a woman at work, but I'm naturally hesitant to pursue it any farther than that. I'm just getting to the point where it seems that there aren't any single women out there at all! unsure.gif


i've never dated or been w/ a girl, of even talked about it outside of my own head but i have had a couple crushes on girls. i know it's normal for girls to check out other girls so i don't consider it to be anything really... there's a girl in my class who i kinda like right now, she has a weird mechanical looking tattoo on her inner forearm and she's so pretty and feminine but there seems something a little masculin about her too (including the tattoo). anyway, good luck!
candycane_girl
xexyz, if it seems like she's enjoying the flirting than I'd say take it a little further. I mean, it can't hurt right?
xexyz
QUOTE(candycane_girl @ Sep 8 2007, 11:37 PM) *
xexyz, if it seems like she's enjoying the flirting than I'd say take it a little further. I mean, it can't hurt right?


I suppose, I just don't know how far I want to go with it. It's funny, I've always felt weird and nervous flirting with someone who's potentially available.

(BTW Snow White I'm a guy. tongue.gif )
kittenb
Why would you feel weird about flirting w/someone who is available? Wouldn't it be weirder to flirt w/somone who is unavaible?

QUOTE(candycane_girl @ Sep 8 2007, 01:48 AM) *
It just feels like the only guys I've met who actually find me attractive live in a whole other country! I don't know what the deal is.


I understand this. Judging by my friends where I keep my blog, Australia loves me.

Well, I have done it again. I just set up a personals page at www.sweetongeeks.com. Goddess help me!
stargazer
xexyz, you're a guy? i thought you were a girl. ok. just have to refrain my mind. but, uh, what's the turn off for you flirting with an available woman? is it because she's a coworker? is it the possibility of your fantasy of her not meeting the reality of her? what gives, dude....

kittenb, now i have to look at that site cause i love the name...

me, frustrated single, but not interested in investing time with dating right now dry.gif
snow white
after a brief stunt on yahoo i've alrady taken down my own profile, but a guy from yahoo did send me a message on myspace, so, yay, one point for me smile.gif i wouldn't recommend yahoo, it sux (in my area anyway, too many lonely rednecks!)


QUOTE(xexyz @ Sep 10 2007, 07:50 PM) *
I suppose, I just don't know how far I want to go with it. It's funny, I've always felt weird and nervous flirting with someone who's potentially available.

(BTW Snow White I'm a guy. tongue.gif )


well then excuse my same sex daydream blathering, i just automatically assume everyone here is a femme. they should put those little male/female symbols by our names, so much easier.

anyway, why not throw caution to the wind and flirt up a storm? either it will turn into playful ribbing or actually turn into a date...chemistry is chemistry.

happy friday everyone, i'm ready for a 12 hour streak of unconsciouness, i can't believe how much work learning is!
erinjane
Last night something sort of weird happened. I was out with a friend, listening to one of my favourite local bands and having a great time, but then I just started feeling so lonely and truly felt like a frustrated single for the first time in a long time. Even though I barely have enough time to relax by myself, I all of a sudden feel like I want to start actively looking for someone again (as opposed to just sitting back, relaxing, and waiting to see what would happen). I hate being at this stage.
candycane_girl
erinjane, I've felt that way many times before. Sometimes I'll feel like I'm lonely just because I haven't gone out and done anything but then I can be in the same situation as you, out somewhere enjoying a band or whatever and the feeling still hits me! I think a lot of the time it happens when I look around and see a bunch of couples. I know that's kind of pathetic but I look at them and just feel like I want what they have!
candycane_girl
crap, double post!
erinjane
Yeah, totally. I think it also has to do with the way I feel in the fall. I kind of get rejuvenated mentally just from being back in class, the weather, etc. Things like that. It makes me re-evaluate where I want to be right now.
snow white
candy and ej, i definatly feel the same way. all summer i just tuned out and thought, oh don't worry, it will come to me! but now i look at this long and lonely winter ahead and i can't stand to do it alone. plus i'm freaking out like my biological clock is ticking and i'm missing out on my "golden years" or whatever. and i keep thinking about my shitty ex, i mean, thinking about him a little too much.

i'm probably too picky.

hopefully there will be something that's been worth waiting for in the (near) future
kittenb
I met this really nice guy today. He seems smart, liberal, has a great voice and nice hands and he also works in anti-violence. So what's the catch? He lives in Washington, D.C. Dammit!

Although it is nice to remember that I actually can be attracted to someone. God it has been awhile. At this point, I would almost kill for a really nice crush-worthy person in my life.
candycane_girl
I think I wasn't too concerned because I knew for a long time that I would be moving to Toronto so I had figured, what's the point of starting a relationship when I'll just have to move anyway? (I don't think I could ever do long distance)

Anyway, I actually responded to a craigslist post that a guy made and we've traded a couple of emails. Okay, so like, two emails. But still! He seems to be interested in good movies and music so that's a plus. Of course now I'm wondering if he's still interested cause I sent him an email this morning and haven't received a response. But I have a bad tendency to freak out quickly when people don't respond to my emails immediately.

Oh, it also doesn't help that I'm on day 9 of my period! My hormones must be going insane!
kittenb
QUOTE(partystar @ Sep 20 2007, 06:48 AM) *
I hope that everything will go well for you everyone needs a special person in his life. I'm happy that I've found it. He's a great person.


Well, thanks partystar. And now I have a new site to go to for all my asian gay porn needs.

ANYway, I decided (or remembered) last night that the all time best thing about being single is food. Sometimes I like to eat weird, like chix breasts deli meat rolled up with peperroni and cheese. Then I threw some spinach on the plate and spritzed a weird ceaser dressing on it. It was weird and messey but was perfect for me.
snow white
QUOTE(kittenb @ Sep 19 2007, 09:14 PM) *
it is nice to remember that I actually can be attracted to someone. God it has been awhile. At this point, I would almost kill for a really nice crush-worthy person in my life.


i just started e-mailling a guy online too. i hope he's not totally weird, but even just e-mailling someone gives me something to think about, you know?

he told me he's 'newly single' b/c he divorced his ex for cheating on him. i've already dated someone who was hung up on an ex and i don't want to do it again. for now though i'm seeing how it goes. at the very least we can just be friends.

i'm really sick of being on my own.

i'm glad you found someone on-line, candy. i hope both of ours work out smile.gif
xexyz
Well, the kind-of flirting has continued, I guess. I get nervous because what if it leads to something? That's kinda scary. unsure.gif
candycane_girl
Yeah, so I totally spoke too soon. I responded to his ad. Then he responded to me. Then I responded back to him. The end. I really don't get it because he made it sound like we had a lot in common (like I noticed some of the hidden references in his ad) and then he just disappeared.

I also joined Ok Cupid and so far that's just a bust. The people I send messages don't respond back and the people who message me are mostly gross older men that don't interest me. I give up.
snow white
xexyz, that definatly is the scary part. but exciting too wink.gif

candy, how is school going? did you go to that mixers thing?
samiam
Ok, here is what I want.

After years of dating, hours of thinking, and way too much time on the phone and on dates that are going nowhere, I am sending something positive into the world.

I want a man with good hair. His good hair could be a lack of hair, but every time I look at him I should not be thinking, "I wish he did not wear his hair that way."

I want a man who can fix things. Not call someone to fix things, although a man who has the money to do that is also attractive, but a man who knows his way around a power tool is really hot.

I want a man who is intelligent. He needs to know things. He needs to be capable of a logical argument. He needs to love my intelligence as much as I respect his.

I want a man with broad shoulders. Sorry, it matters. Slight guys are ok, but a set of broad shoulders, with smooth biceps... hmmm.

I want a man with a good job. Sorry that this matters, too. He needs to know how to make and manage money. He needs to have minimal debt and a reasonable plan for the future. I want a man who knows how to save and how to spend, who will support his family and be willing to sacrifice when that is in order.

I want a man who believes that people should have control over their own bodies, and that love is love is love.

I want a man who loves my dog.

I want a man who loves my mother's cooking.

I want a man who will fit in on the beach with my crazy hippy family.

I want a man who is willing to wait out the next year or two in Reno and then move with me somewhere more appropriate.

I want a man who makes me cum. This is, unfortunately, important as well. He really needs to turn me on or all the other stuff becomes moot.

What else? Well, he needs to be faithful, adventurous, athletic, funny, know more than me about music, passionate, clever, witty, a good driver, a willing participant, and... and... mine.
greenbean
Thats sweet, Sam. I'm a sucker for broad sholders too..altho my new crush is very narrow.

I read this today: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?...3/LV9LS7VVP.DTL
and having lived in San Francisco for eight years, many of those years as a single, I laughed at the headline. I absolutely agree with the article,:SF (as are a lot of major cities) is a great place to live if you want to STAY single. I think the study should have clarified. rolleyes.gif
knorl05
samiam: that's the way to do it... ask and ye shall receive.
after knowing what you want, you are more able to recognize it when it becomes available instead of just going through the motions with any shmo wanting your attention.
kittenb
QUOTE(samiam @ Sep 23 2007, 09:43 PM) *
I want a man with good hair. His good hair could be a lack of hair, but every time I look at him I should not be thinking, "I wish he did not wear his hair that way."
Oh my gosh did that make me laugh.

I like your list. It's funny that you post it today. Just last night I was getting ready for sleep and I said, "Goddess, we've been through this before. You know what I want. I've made the list. Now please send him to me." This morning I gor my first hit off of my "Sweet On Geeks" profile. I thought the timing of that, plus the timing of you post was interesting.

In the past week I have met two interesting guys. Both went nowhere (I swear that the one from Sat. night ditched me b/c I am not a smoker) but it was nice to find two crush-worthy guys in a week. It's been a while.
candycane_girl
That list is very thorough, samiam! Hair is a big issue for me. I don't know why but it is, and I can't really stand the idea of being with a bald guy. I also haaaate facial hair! I've now had two guys with full on beards and mustaches and it drove me crazy.

As for my hunt, I've been talking to this guy from OK Cupid. He seems pretty cool and I think we have a lot in common so I'll just see where it goes.
snow white
well...i talked to my internet on aim last night and it was ok. looks like it's not going anywhere. he said he was "recently single" and from what i could tell seemed pretty hung up on his marriage still...

back to square one.

i like guys with really short hair and facial hair. not outta control, but like, a little "soul patch". i like tattoos too. my mom makes fun of the type of guy i like. sleep.gif
nickclick
facial hair is a must, or at least the ease of ability to grow it. i'm not into that leo dicaprio pre-puberty look.
erinjane
It's funny, I was just thinking the other day how I've developed this list of things I look for. And it's not a list that I've written out, it's just like a mental checklist when I meet someone, but I'm becoming a lot more aware of how I'll go through it.

I ran into casual sex guy on the weekend and now I feel so sexually frustrated. I don't really want to sleep with him again because I really feel like I need to have relationship sex that's somewhat meaningful, but I'm still thinking about it.

Last night I had a dream some attractive no-one-in-particular was kissing my neck and I was just melting. *swoon*
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