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i_am_jan
I must have missed this shite about polly's sock monkey and pointy bird's monkey but I'm laughing regardless : )

Just stopping in to remind the information highway tonight that I alive and I am childfreeandluvinit wink.gif Please, universe, let me never impregnate, procreate nor repopulate. Then I can continue to take long bike rides on a gorgeous day, play my guitar for three hours, read my stupid books, Lynda Barry & King-Cat comics, watch back to back Sex And The City reruns, Conan O'Brien, many other items of an adult nature such as catching a buzz, and, of course, masturbate myself to orgasm with every single light in the house on sprawled out (*very* sexily, I might add, and *very* comfortably) in the middle of my LR sofa. meow
thepointybird
I have somehow missed it too, but my monkey thanks everyone for the attention!
girltrouble
really, pointy bird?
i can't belive you could miss his sillyness. i think he might be doing these things when you're not looking.

he's a nice enough guy, but now it seems he thinks he's been naughty, and needs a spanking. i think he's being silly but he insists.... he's doing some crazy german accent, and taunting me. c'mon! he says, spank me! spank your monkey. it's actually pretty funny. he's got a goofy sense of humor.

ut...! now he's doing impressions of george bush!


oh he's goooooooood!
prophecy_grrl
Hey there CBC busties - just read an interesting post on jezebel about a young, childless woman getting Essure (comments are overall positive, too):
http://jezebel.com/5030801/having-kids-som...swer-is-just-no

I know I'm not towing the CBC party line here, but I do fear that hypothetical regret post-sterilization. I envy people who are that certain (of anything in their life, really). Anyway, when the time comes it will be prophecyguy's problem; I've been responsible for BC long enough, thank you. In the meantime, I'm a big fan of my semi-permanent (10 years!) IUD.

polly - does he know about the no scalpel vasectomy? BIL had it done and was back at work the next day, no fuss, no muss.
pollystyrene
Oh, I think you mentioned that, prophecy....would he mind making a recommendation on the doctor, assuming he thought he was good. Do you know if it was covered by insurance?


humanist77
That's a good article, prophecy..I sent it off to the boy, who is very rigidly against sterilization, especially before about the age of 40. It bothers me a bit, of course, because he says now that he doesn't ever want kids, but that no one can be 100% sure about the future.

This bothers me not only because he's basically saying that his feelings about it might change some day, but also because he's not respecting the certainty of mine. He does respect how I feel, but not how sure I am about it. He's pretty damn stubborn about these things...

I don't know if there's anything I can say that will get him to understand, but I guess in the end, all that matters is that I know what I want (or don't :P) and when I am able, I will get the procedure done. If that is a deal breaker for him, then I will know we're not right for each other.
sassy
I want essure! I was under the impression you could only get it if you had already had a child (something about the shape of things down there), but I guess I was wrong. I doubt I could find a doctor here (Kentucky) to do mine, though. All of my friends already have kids!
thirtiesgirl
QUOTE(auralpoison @ Jul 27 2008, 01:32 PM) *
That just happened to me shopping last night! The woman behind the counter started chatting with me & asked my age, then if I had kids. I'm thirty-three & no. She was shocked & amazed as she was several years younger than me & had three already.

I get this from the kids I work with at school. I know they're just asking because they want to get to know me, but they always act so damn shocked when I tell them I don't have kids. I usually get the "how come you don't have kids?" question (kids are always so direct) and I tell them that I like kids a lot, but I don't want to have any of my own because I prefer living independently from children. It's a telling factor that most of their parents are 10 to 15 years younger than me, and many have 4 to 5 kids. Unfortunately, being single and child-free is a foreign concept to most of my students.
pollystyrene
And now it's time for another episode of "Let's Laugh at the Breeders!"

I'm comments #10 & #18 in there (and no, not my real location.)
mornington
ok, whine ahead:
why do people take babies to see the dark knight? and not even a daytime showing, but the evening one? Although it only cried at the beginning and the end, either the film was so loud I couldn't hear the kid, or the parent(s) took him/her out. But still.


Also: I've had the contraceptive implant fitted. Three weeks in and it looks good!
humanist77
Yeah there were at least a couple of toddlers at TDK when we went-starting at 9:30 p.m.. I only heard a little babbling, but I was totally ready to yell something if one of them started screaming or crying without being removed. They didn't, but still-the movie wasn't over until after midnight! Shouldn't these kids be in bed??!!

hehe 'Let's laugh at the breeders'....
deschatsrouge
*does happy lezzie childfree dance*
i_am_jan
Thanks Polly, that was fun, *snickers* (I need a baby planner ... psyche!!) laugh.gif
turbojenn
Prophecy - I'll have to chat with you sometime soon on the IUD - I'm very seriously considering it, too, and would love to hear your (and any other bustie) feedback. I'd love to get off the pill, and have something more permanent.
missjoy
Something I've been mulling over in my head lately - lets see if I can put it into words.

Often when parents are talking with the childfree they bring up the fact that we can't understand how it feels to be a parent because we aren't parents. However they know what it is like to be childfree because they once didn't have children. Some even say they were childfree by choice but then changed their minds or "oops" and now they love being a parent, so they know exactly how we feel, but we can't know how they feel.

I don't agree. I know, and have always known, that I don't want kids. I am childfree for life. I would never change my mind and if there was an "oops" then I would take care of it before having the baby . There would be no question. So no, you don't really know what it is like to be me - the fact that you have had a child means that you don't know what it is like to be truly committed to being childfree.

Does this make much sense? It makes sense in my mind.
humanist77
ugh, missjoy-I get that a lot from parents. Especially telling me how they once thought they'd never be a parent, and then one day either by choice or by accident they changed. I fail to see their point. How can they be so sure that one day I might feel differently?

One such person is a male co-worker of mine with a 3 year old daughter. He loves telling me how this is surely just a phase I'm going through (um..for over ten years?) and one day something will just kick in. Then forgetting that he's trying to get me to change sides, he tells me stories of his adorable daughter removing her dirty diapers and throwing at her mother's head, and more recently a ceramic plate-also at her head-because she wasn't getting her dinner fast enough.

Okay, I guess that's typical bratty 3 year old behavior (or is it? I wouldn't know; they're all monsters to me), but he's really not putting forth a convincing argument as to why I should get one of my own. He backtracks and insists that she's really well behaved. The only time I've seen the child, she had a meltdown in the lobby of our workplace, but thankfully her mother took her outside.

This coworker was also telling me about some breeder friends of theirs who just had their 3rd set of twins, all in-vitro. I'm irritated enough with couples who spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on fertility treatments just to get their first kid-it's pretty much a given that they'll be getting at least 2 instead of just one, but these people decided the first two weren't enough??!! Or the first four??!! I'm more than appalled.
girltrouble
oh god human, that just chaps my hide too. i think it is so irresponsible to have more than two kids, and i HATE the way the media fawn over these sextuplets etc.

everytime i see even a second of that damn show 'jon and kate +8' i curse outloud. i fucking hate that shit. it's like this stupid circus trick that gets them on the today show and encourage other people to go and have more kids than they can handle....
pollystyrene
QUOTE(girltrouble @ Aug 10 2008, 01:19 AM) *
everytime i see even a second of that damn show 'jon and kate +8' i curse outloud. i fucking hate that shit. it's like this stupid circus trick that gets them on the today show and encourage other people to go and have more kids than they can handle....


Yeah, I feel the same way about that show. It just makes my skin crawl- from the way Kate's belly looked when they show pictures of her pregnant, to the way I see them bicker with each other because of all the stress, to the gas guzzling delivery van they have to drive to cart those crotch fruit around in.

I mean, the environmental impact of that situation alone makes my blood boil and I'm no shining example of environmental-friendliness. I don't recycle (mainly because it's not an option in my condo...I *could* save all my recyclables and take them to my parent's, but I don't...and I'm pretty sure that even if I could recycle at home, I'd be too lazy to do so.) I live in the suburbs so I drive everywhere (at least it's in a fairly fuel-efficient Corolla) and I enjoy air conditioning a lot.....but fer crissakes, they use disposable everything, the amount of diapers they must use is astronomical, the water to wash clothes for 10 people is mind-boggling....but I'm considered selfish because I don't want to procreate....riiiiiight.
girltrouble
yeah, my ex has a friend from highschool, who, i think is on child #6 with no sign of stopping, the only thing in her favor is that she didn't get them via test tube, which is cold comfort, her dumb ass is catholic, and this woman's older sister is on child #8. both of them have fucked up wombs, that have real trouble not miscarrying, and if the little larva do take hold they have to wear corsets because having so many children has fucked up their whole reproductive system. they're both married, but they both have trouble making ends meet, home school, and are constantly stressed out. hmmmmm wonder why? but are there any signs of them slowing down? fuck NO. the pope needs more little mindless zombies to give birth to more little zombies to give birth....and on and on and on.....

fucking stupid people. i swear, some people have children and just go simple. it's like they lose their mind, mr. trouble adopted a daughter who's now in her 30's, she's already got 2 kids, and i found out that this last week she just had, and i shit you not, her 9th abortion. now, it's been explained to me that if a guy looks at her crosseyed, she gets preggo, but she can't resist. this last one was with the fucking mailman, who didn't want to wear a condom. honestly, i haven't a violent bone in my body, but i want to smack the shit out of her. i was looking at mr. t, like, are you joking me? really? 9? and the mr just shrugs and says "yeah, well she's got impulse control issues." you think? that is just the start of her issues. and she just explains that she's manic depressive, and it's part of her mania, but it's time to get those tubes tied. fo reals. that's just sheer stupididty. she has two kids and if she catches something who is going to take care of them? she needs to get on medication or whatever...fuck.

sorry, i just needed to get that off my chest.
sassy
Honestly, I like "John & Kate, Plus 8." No, I don't necessarily agree with using in-vitro when they could have adopted, but considering that they have 8 kids, I think they do a good job of taking care of them and disciplining them. It could be a lot, lot worse.

Speaking of raising kids, I'm at my last straw with my sister-in-law. They currently have a 1-year-old whom they force upon my father-in-law five days a week without compensation. The past couple of days, he has had really bad food poisoning and told her not to bring the kid over because he was too sick. She brought it anyways and then got mad when he turned her away because he was throwing up! She's expecting another child in October and frankly, I feel bad for him. I know he won't turn down watching his grandkids, but I also know he doesn't want to expend the energy five days a week to raise his daughter's children, and for free. She isn't grateful at all, which I think is what makes me the most angry. ohmy.gif
pollystyrene
QUOTE(girltrouble @ Aug 10 2008, 03:57 AM) *
"yeah, well she's got impulse control issues."


People with "impulse control issues" like that need to get an IUD or some form of passive, semi-permanent (or completely permanent- that'd be good, too!) birth control.

As pro-choice as I am, there gets to be a point where I start to think it's wrong. I guess it's better to destroy some half-formed cells than bring them into the world, but I just want to tell them that they're making the rest of us look bad.
thirtiesgirl
CROTCH FRUIT?!? ....haaaaa.... OMG.... I think I've just expired from laughter. Oh, my side. Somebody stitch it, please.
culturehandy
Since when did it become socially acceptable for people with kids to say if you don't watch my kids you can't see them and I'm going to get ma. Clearly you thought you werew adult enough in the first place to have a kid, maybe it's time for parents to ante up and put their kids in day care or take care of them.

And 9 abortions. Damn.

8 kids. double fucking damn. I
auralpoison
You know who pisses me off more than Jon & Kate + 8? The Duggar Family. They're into this nutso Christian movement called Quiverfull that uses a psalm to encourage people to spew forth as many sprogs as they can for the army of the Lord. SEVENTEEN KIDS & ONE ON THE WAY! Think about it. Michelle Duggar has basically been pregnant for most of her adult life. WTF?
girltrouble
that's creepy, aural, but it so sounds like my ex's friend. they are homeschools too. i feel sorry for them...

and polly, believe me, i know, i agree totally, but knowing her if you even suggest the thing, the'll be a blow up, lots of screaming, yelling, and the cops will be called..... trust me... it's like a seasonal thing with her. once a season she freaks out and causes a scene. which sucks, i kinda like her, but her behavior is just....tch.....


sassy, i get where you are coming from, but i look at it from an earth resource point of view, it's just selfish, and while jon + kate may take care of their kids, do they really need 8 kids? does anyone in this day and age? how they take care of them, to me is almost irrelivant, i just think they are fuckwads for having so many kids no matter how they get there, unless it's adoption. it's just this weird little ego boost they-- and other parents with huge numbers of kids--- get from all the attention, from the public, from local tv, and national tv. it's just revolting.
sassy
I have to agree...the Duggar family is out of control! On the shows I've seen about them, they make the older kids help teach school to the younger kids. When you have so many kids that you can make a classroom out of them, it's time to stop.
i_am_jan
QUOTE(sassy @ Aug 11 2008, 08:54 AM) *
I have to agree...the Duggar family is out of control! On the shows I've seen about them, they make the older kids help teach school to the younger kids. When you have so many kids that you can make a classroom out of them, it's time to stop.


The Duggars are an obscene, selfish, space-hogging, resource-greedy, display of some damn shabby, so-called "values."

I feel soooo sorry for those kids. Believe me, having come from a family of 6 kids, there is NO WAY the Duggar children would CHOOSE the lifestyle they are each forced to lead. In my mind, I'm pretty certain of that. Though my parents did try, and I was from a middle-class suburban home, we kids were all straight NEGLECTED. Mom simply DIDN'T have the time. To talk to each of us as individuals...find out about our hearts...learn about the person who was inside each of us...help us to become the person we were destined to become. Instead, in order to make life "do-able", everything had to be done in the name of convenience for the parents...this equals: military style. With lots of discipline. For anyone who is familiar with the term, it was a very SPARTAN environment. Yet, how else are TWO people (ONE, more like, actually, ma) supposed to take care of herself, PLUS 6 or 7 OTHER people? Hmm, let's put our thinking caps on. The answer: it's not possible.

And like, what? how will the Duggar children who desire it ever afford the good education that a bright, creative mind deserves? Certainly there are some gifted children in that family. And bright children NEED TONS of individual attention. FROM PARENTS. What will they do? HOME-COLLEGE them? What a shame. All so that Mr. and Mrs. Duggar could please the almighty great and powerful OZ apparently.
candycane_girl
Alrighty, I have to chime in on the Jon + Kate thing. What pisses me off about those two fuckwads is that apparently they had trouble conceiving from the very beginning. So if they had so much trouble conceiving, why the hell weren't they happy that they just had twins?! Oh noooooo, two healthy children weren't enough, they had to go and try for another one (and everyone knows how in-vitro works so it would never be just one). To me, that's just selfish. Hell, my parents never had trouble conceiving but they stopped at two kids because they figured that was enough. If I wanted children and I had trouble conceiving, I would be happy just to have one. But those two are just so fucking selfish.
thirtiesgirl
The comment about the fundamentalist religious folks home schooling their kids reminded me of something about my previous job. I used to work as a counselor at an independent study school in LA called City of Angels. Basically, it's a school program for kids who aren't being successful in a regular public school for various reasons. The kids have individual appointments with their teacher once a week and are given packets of work to do, to turn in at their next weekly appointment. In some cases, parents decided to enroll their kids at City of Angels because they can't afford a private school, but they don't want their kids in public school either, so C of A is a way to keep them away from other kids and public school influences. (Not that there aren't plenty of things happening at private schools, but most parents aren't thinking that comprehensively.)

...Anyhoo, my point with all that blather is that one time I got talking on the phone with a parent of two boys at C of A who said some scary things. She's a very religious parent, christian fundamentalist, and like I wrote above, decided to take her sons out of a traditional public school and enroll them at C of A. She thought it was appropriate to further explain to me why she took her sons out of public school, which was that they'd had an openly gay English teacher, and their science teacher was from another country and his accent was 'too thick' for her sons to understand. Gah!! I wanted to scream when she told me that, but all I could say was "mm-hmm, I understand."
thirtiesgirl
The comment about the fundamentalist religious folks home schooling their kids reminded me of something about my previous job. I used to work as a counselor at an independent study school in LA called City of Angels. Basically, it's a school program for kids who aren't being successful in a regular public school for various reasons. The kids have individual appointments with their teacher once a week and are given packets of work to do, to turn in at their next weekly appointment. In some cases, parents decided to enroll their kids at City of Angels because they can't afford a private school, but they don't want their kids in public school either, so C of A is a way to keep them away from other kids and public school influences. (Not that there aren't plenty of things happening at private schools, but most parents aren't thinking that comprehensively.)

...Anyhoo, my point with all that blather is that one time I got talking on the phone with a parent of two boys at C of A who said some scary things. She's a very religious parent, christian fundamentalist, and like I wrote above, decided to take her sons out of a traditional public school and enroll them at C of A. She thought it was appropriate to further explain to me why she took her sons out of public school, which was that they'd had an openly gay English teacher, and their science teacher was from another country and his accent was 'too thick' for her sons to understand. Gah!! I wanted to scream when she told me that, but all I could say was "mm-hmm, I understand."
missladyj
Guess what? IDON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR "BIRTH PLAN"!!

as for the update on " People- I - Know-Who-Are- Poppin-Em- Out-Like-Pez-Dispensors" all I can say is better you than me .
girltrouble
ok, i had never heard about the duggans, but what the goddamn fuck is that shit?!? 17 kids? and she looks like a early 80's mormon.
o m f g.
now why on god's green earth should these selfish asshats have a tv show? and really...tatertot casserole?
this country has been posessed by satan himself.

it's not right i tell you!
pollystyrene
We had a spa day at the office today- no patients, just mani/pedi's, massages and facials for all of us- woohoo! Anyway, so we're sitting around getting our nails done and the newest employee, this 20-year-old space cadet, is flipping through a recent People magazine, the one with the latest Brad/Angelina spawn on the cover and she's just ooing and ahhing over how adorable they are, and the nail tech gets in on it too, then they start talking about how wonderful that Jon & Kate + 8 show is....ugh.

No one in my office has kids and before this latest employee, there was a nice unspoken, mutual understanding of "we like seeing kids...we like it even more when they leave the office and there will be no fawning over them while they're here and no expectation of any of us having any anytime soon." Now we have this girl who has the potential to be baby-crazy. Faaabulous. ETA: Add to which, she's already displayed annoying habit of asking oddly timed/phrased personal questions. Hmm, might be time to whip out some of those retorts to the "when are you going to have a baby?" question from metafilter that someone posted awhile back.

And then, on another note, same co-worker, though- my cousin/boss mentioned how she has a sneaking suspicion that her brother's son, who's 6 or so, could grow up to be gay. No negative connotation- she was just stating the fact, albeit based on common stereotypes. When she said it, the 20-year-old groaned, like my cousin was announcing the kid had cancer or something. dry.gif Yikes. We also used to have a very gay-friendly office. Now I have to add this to my list of reasons to not like this girl.

Personally, I think the tater-tot casserole is the only thing that stops me from creating Duggar family voodoo dolls. And if loving tater-tots is wrong then I don't wanna be right!
missladyj
sign me up for the fanclub for the tater tot casserole. The other night I had a delicacy called a tater tot pizza. so delish!
girltrouble
QUOTE
in order to make life "do-able", everything had to be done in the name of convenience for the parents...this equals: military style. With lots of discipline. For anyone who is familiar with the term, it was a very SPARTAN environment.


oh that shit pisses me off. i'm sure you're probably familiar with the movie "cheaper by the dozen." it's based on the real life story of an efficency expert named galbreath who had i think 10 kids on the theory that everything is cheaper by the dozen, so why not order your family accordingly.

now let's just stop and think about this for a second, who do you think spends less money? the family with one child or 10?



eta: i don't mind the tatertots, but a casserole? that's got the debbil's paw print all over it!

sybarite
Does the tatertot casserole include ketchup, or do you stir it in yourself?
girltrouble
i'm not sure about ketchup, but i've heard the recipie is better if you grind the tots yourself.
thirtiesgirl
May I just say, Pollystyrene, that I'm so jealous that you work in an office that does spa days. I've never worked in an office that does anything remotely similar, and the employees are generally left to fend for themselves (aside from office christmas parties & the like, where an attempted sense of cameraderie is supposed to be maintained).

...Anyway, I'm green with envy, young space cadet employee notwithstanding. Maybe it's time to hook her up with a small child for the afternoon and let her see what it's like? I don't know whether it would work on her, but my experience with same caused me to excise and stomp on my biological clock, making sure it was smashed into a million little pieces before sweeping it into the dustbin, never to be heard from again.
deschatsrouge
QUOTE(thirtiesgirl @ Aug 14 2008, 08:53 PM) *
My experience with same caused me to excise and stomp on my biological clock, making sure it was smashed into a million little pieces before sweeping it into the dustbin, never to be heard from again.


I did something quite similar several years ago. It was the same time I was diagnosed with PCOS, I began telling every one I was barren, and *sob* not to mention it any more.
i_am_jan
QUOTE(deschatsrouge @ Aug 15 2008, 03:35 AM) *
I did something quite similar several years ago. It was the same time I was diagnosed with PCOS, I began telling every one I was barren, and *sob* not to mention it any more.


Yer funny, dechat!! (*sob*, LOL!)

Was over at my mom's tonight and she started nagging (again, never ends) about what a horrible disposition I had ever since I was an infant, always grumpy, whining, moody, difficult. (First, I'll give you one guess who I got that shite from honestly.) Next, I'm tired of hearing this. She honestly says it in order to make me feel bad/guilty, whenever she gets in a bad mood and wants to talk about how bad her life has been. What I want to say is: kids don't ASK to be brought here?! WTF are you talking about?! YOU WANTED a kid for you and Dad to play house and get a portrait taken at Olan Mills. Now maybe, just maybe, you got what you asked for, cuz HERE I F'in AM, bad mood and all. UM, When you ask for a child, in my opinion, you have a responsibility to give that kid everything it's little heart desires, wait on it hand and foot (sorry! that's JUST the way it is) ~ AND to put up with its disposition, like it or freaking not, YOU ASKED for it. (I don't say this to her because you know the old adage "you can't argue with a moron", hate to call her a moron, but I'm trying to describe her sensibilities here.)

My question is: What is it with so many breeders not seeming to understand that they CHOSE kids? I swear, every freaking one I hear talks as though she were "the virgin mary" and "god" (from heaven) willed a baby to miraculously grow in her womb. Or like, they HAD TO have a baby, for whatever reason, had no choice in the matter.

Why don't so many breeders seem to understand the concept of CHOICE in any way, shape or form? They don't seem to understand that they HAD a choice, and that they MADE a choice. (And of course, they usually don't believe in choice for anyone else either, and I think these two phenomena are related!!).

/rant
deschatsrouge
People mistake the "biological clock" as something biological, when in fact it is purely cultural. There is nothing remotely biological about the "biological clock" ( I learned this in my anthropology class). The cultural pressure to reproduce is intense, demonstrated by the constant crap CBC'rs get. Not everyone are the fiercely independent thinkers that reside here. Many give in, and of course, because they didn't make their own choice, but let culture make it for them, they are bitter. The culture of reproduction is so ingrained in them that they never stop to think that they may have the choice to not have children. They then carry that on in their thinking, thus pressuring others to succumb to the child bearing element of culture.


thirtiesgirl
Ok, I just saw this Priceline commercial on tv and was offended. I mean, I love the Shat... but seriously, distracting women with babies?! WTF?!
pollystyrene
See, I'm waaaay more excited about the lemur than those stoopid babies.

Trust me, thirtiesgirl, this is not someone who should be allowed to have kids. I've noticed this trend among people a little younger than me, like in their early 20's- they're completely incapable of caring for themselves, and this girl is a perfect example of that. I'm not talking about dressing inappropriately for a job interview or stuff like that. I'm talking about basic stuff, judgement calls that should be common sense, that I knew how to do by the time I was 15.

The second week she worked for us, she came to work on Monday with a cold. Because the clinical staff wears masks and gloves, it would be pretty hard to pass it on to patients, but there is the risk of passing it to co-workers (and an entire staff with colds would be a disaster) and you just don't work as well when you're sick. My boss's opinion is that she'd rather you take a day or two off, or however many you need (I had to take a whole week off last winter when I had this horrific cold/bacterial thing that just went on and on) and come back when you're 100%. So later that morning she went home...okay, not a big deal. She comes in Tuesday, not sounding any better, stayed till 9:30, then went home. Wednesday, she came in, stayed until 10 or so, then went home and finally went to a doctor. Turns out it was just allergies that caused an upper respiratory infection, and finally on Thursday, she stayed home and since we have a 4-day work week, she was done for the week. Granted, she's only 20 and it may have been because she'd only been there a week, but put on the big girl panties, make a fucking decision and just stay home- none of this mamby-pamby crap with coming into work for 2 hours three days in a row.

So, wait, then it gets worse. The next Monday, she comes in and over the weekend, like on Friday, she had gotten attacked by her boyfriend's roommate's pitbull. It bit her on her inner-thigh and dragged her to the ground. She went to the er, got stitches and everything. On Sunday, one of the stitches popped and she got horribly infected. Went back to the er, they told her they couldn't re-stitch her because they'd seal up the infection and she needed to stay home for 2 days with her leg up. So, what does she do? She comes into work. Hobbles around all day. Rips open the wound again. By the end of the week, she was taking more time off and was in the hospital on IV antibiotics and the plastic surgeon came by to see how much of her thigh they were going to have to take out to get rid of the necrotic tissue.

It's just this total lack of judgement. The dental assistant we attempted to train last year, who was approximately the same age and a total fuck-up (poor white trash, bad childhood, the works) was the same way- she had a lot of "oh, I feel like crap" days and one day came in and told us that the night before, her stomach hurt, so she drank an ENTIRE bottle of Pepto-Bismol. blink.gif Yeah, it's an over-the-counter drug that's been around forever, but there's some serious medication in there- it's aspirin-based and they don't even let pregnant women take it. Who the hell thinks taking an entire bottle of any medication is going to solve the problem?!?! How this girl didn't die or get really, really sick from an aspirin overdose is beyond me. Oh, and she had a lot of personal drama going on and once left a used pregnancy test on the counter in the lab area. Um, eww.

I mean, by the time I was 15, I could have pretty much taken care of myself- I knew how to self-medicate safely and when to call a doctor, cook for myself, clean a toilet, balance a checkbook....what the hell is going on that these kids have no clue?
pollystyrene
Separate post in reply to deschat- I was torturing myself by watching Super Nanny last night and they had this couple on who were probably in their late 20's/early 30's. I missed the very beginning of it where they talked about the parents' backgrounds, but they had SEVEN kids in the span of EIGHT years, the oldest of whom was now 8-years-old. In the confrontation meeting, where the nanny sits down with the parents and tells them what they're doing wrong, she seemed to imply that the mother/wife admitted that she only had all those kids because it's what her husband wanted and now she felt there were all these expectations being put upon her....just mind-boggling.
girltrouble
QUOTE
what the hell is going on that these kids have no clue?
um, i'm going to hazard a guess that they are being raised/pimped in packs of 8 and 17 by selfish overworked adults on tv shows....



...but i could be wrong.


my other theory is that stupid is contagious.
sybarite
laugh.gif laugh.gif at GT

thirtiesgirl
QUOTE(pollystyrene @ Aug 14 2008, 11:53 PM) *
See, I'm waaaay more excited about the lemur than those stoopid babies.

As was I, but what kind of message is this commercial sending? I was offended by it.

QUOTE(pollystyrene @ Aug 14 2008, 11:53 PM) *
Trust me, thirtiesgirl, this is not someone who should be allowed to have kids. I've noticed this trend among people a little younger than me, like in their early 20's- they're completely incapable of caring for themselves, and this girl is a perfect example of that. I'm not talking about dressing inappropriately for a job interview or stuff like that. I'm talking about basic stuff, judgement calls that should be common sense, that I knew how to do by the time I was 15.

Nor was I suggesting that she should have a baby. I was suggesting that she needs to have some exposure to young children (toddlers and babies, I'm thinking) to maybe help her reconsider what she wants. If/when she realizes the responsibility and near complete selflessness it takes to raise a sprog, she might begin to change her tune.

QUOTE(deschatsrouge @ Aug 14 2008, 09:24 PM) *
People mistake the "biological clock" as something biological, when in fact it is purely cultural. There is nothing remotely biological about the "biological clock" ( I learned this in my anthropology class). The cultural pressure to reproduce is intense, demonstrated by the constant crap CBC'rs get. Not everyone are the fiercely independent thinkers that reside here. Many give in, and of course, because they didn't make their own choice, but let culture make it for them, they are bitter. The culture of reproduction is so ingrained in them that they never stop to think that they may have the choice to not have children. They then carry that on in their thinking, thus pressuring others to succumb to the child bearing element of culture.

This I know. I had the experience of falling victim to it in my early 20s. I was in a long-term relationship with a guy who I thought was 'The One.' I wanted to marry him, buy the house, have kids, etc. That was my dream at the time. When our relationship ended, in a rather ugly way, I had some time to re-evaluate what I wanted in life and eventually came to the conclusion that kids were not in the picture for me. I learned to value my independence. I was able to go back to school and change my career, which I don't think I would have had the time or energy for if I'd had kids. I also watched as old friends and co-workers had children and gave up parts of their lives to raise them. I realized it wasn't for me and wasn't a life path I wanted to follow. But for a while there in my early 20s, I thought it was.
thepointybird
Deschatsrouge, that's interesting about your anthropological studies showing the biological clock is a cultural construct. I have always suspected as much! It's more women feeling that they don't wanna get left behind, I reckon - competitive childbearing, if you will!
i_am_jan
It makes complete sense to me that the so-called "bio" clock is actually a culturally motivated feeling.

That explains why, at a very young age, I KNEW I wasn't cut out for/didn't want kids; yet, in early 30's I actually felt compelled to ENTERTAIN the notion of kids again. If it had been some "bio" clock at work, why would my biology be sending me mixed messages? (I.e., I knew early I didn't want them), so why now a mixed signal? But now that I look at the situation, what really happened was that biology was telling me one thing very early (that it was not for me), but I was engaged culturally to entertain this notion of having kids later, when I felt it was "now or never" for me to do this thing that everyone else was doing.

missladyj
I am a firm believer that biology is not destiny. Just because I have a womb doesn't mean that I have to get pregnant.

I was at my folks house and my father comments to me that one of my cousins didn't have her first child till she was 42. I asked him what was his point? and then told t hem both to enjoy the one grandchild that they do have.
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