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doodlebug
So. My 40 year old co-worker has been with her hubby for 20 years. They got preggers and decided to have the child. No problem.

So my 20 year old co-worker gets married at the same time as this other co-worker's baby is born. Now EVERYONE in the office is started to say stuff to the 20 year old about how she's next for mommyhood, b/c she just got married.

HELLO???? She's TWENTY!!!!!!!!!!!! Why the fuck are they putting the baby pressure on her now? She's TWENTY!!!!! For FUCK'S SAKE!!!!!!!!!!

Thank goddess this young lady is head strong and knows her mind....and knows very well she's not ready for kids. But honestly. What makes people lose their senses and start pressuring a TWENTY year old, who's just started her career, to have a damned baby????
futura
Um..because women are breeding machines? No seriously Doodlebug, i find asking such questions so intrusive and disrespectful. I'm glad the 20 yr old has her head screwed on right.

I have discovered that the longing i 'should' have for a baby is what i have for kitties. my house is not fit for a cat but i have had 3 cats in the past, when i was still living with my ex. Now when i'm on the street and i see a cat my insides go all AWWWW. I have nothing of the sort when i see kids. So there you have it, i will grow old to be a cat lady.
Right now i live in a town that is literally bombarded with kids.

Hey Unicorn, nice to see you on board! *waves*
candycane_girl
doodle, they did it because she's married. I'd like to wager that not one of those people would have suggested she had a baby if she was still single. I think that 20 is pretty young to be getting married but whatever. The point is that as soon as a woman gets married there's this expectation that she'll be popping out babies soon. I'm sure back in the old days the chances of a woman getting pregnant not long after marriage were very high so comments about having kids were expected. But of course, now we have options.
designermedusa
I was in NYC this weekend and noticed a couple examples of bad parents. One child was hanging from the bars of scaffolding, basically treating it like a piece of playground equipment. Then there was a small child that had a water gun in the rain, and he was squirting it at people. Mr. DM and I made a comment, and the child's parent finally told him to stop.

Twin DM went to see The Hangover this weekend, and she said there was a ton of children in the theatre. Who takes their child to see The Hangover?
girltrouble
omg. cnn's poll for today (yes, i'm serious!)
is an ugly baby harder to love?

on the bottom right of the page.

i.
love.
cnn.
candycane_girl
dm, I will never understand people who take their kids to see movies like that! I remember when I saw Saving Private Ryan there was this mom with a group of kids who looked no older than eight. I could not believe it! What is wrong with people?

GT, that poll is hilarious. I remember being at a family function and seeing this baby that was very distantly related to me. It looked like the unibrowed baby on The Simpsons. *shudder*
pollystyrene
QUOTE(candycane_girl @ Jun 24 2009, 04:31 PM) *
dm, I will never understand people who take their kids to see movies like that! I remember when I saw Saving Private Ryan there was this mom with a group of kids who looked no older than eight. I could not believe it! What is wrong with people?

GT, that poll is hilarious. I remember being at a family function and seeing this baby that was very distantly related to me. It looked like the unibrowed baby on The Simpsons. *shudder*


Yikes, Baby Gerald, cc girl?

That poll, gt, was related to this study.
girltrouble
ich... polly that study is terrible. talk about shoddy workmanship. oof.

candy, in my distant family there is (or was) a poor child that looked like a mocha version of weekly world news' bat boy. pointed ears, sharp teeth, and nosferatu like countenance. i'm sure i looked shell shocked after looking at him. i can still here the announcer:

and now, the girl trouble players would like to reenact the cradle scene from rosemary's baby...

*gt approaches the crib, cautiously, a terrified look on her face. she looks in then winces, reflexively, then recoils.... a noise escapes from her lips.....a blood curdling...*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!


.....and scene!
pollystyrene
Reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where there's the "You gotta see the babeeeee!" character, and it turns out the baby is hideous and Kramer's the only one with the nerve to say the baby's ugly- "He looks like Dwight Eisenhower!" [or was it Lyndon Johnson? I don't remember!]

I have some distant relatives who I'd see once every couple years at our family's Christmas parties, and all their kids, until they were about 6 years old, had really oddly shaped heads- long faces, and the sides of their skulls were really flat, giving them this boxy, rectangular look. Yikes.
angie_21
Well, Kramer always was the one to see through all the bs and just say it like it is

The flat-head look thing is really common these days! One of my cousin's kids had it, it's something to do with how you always have to let babies sleep on their backs, so the constant pressure actually flattens their soft baby skulls. He had to wear a helmet for 6 months to get rid of it!

I see soooo many ugly baby pictures on Facebook now. Newborns are cute once, then ugly until they're 2 years old. All parents should be notified that they are the only ones who think their baby is cute at 6 months old!
lilacwine13
Huh, AZ Guy always make the comment that babies look like aliens until they're three months old and I can see where he's coming from on a lot of them.

I hear you on the facebook photos, one of my Facebook friends posted photos of her daughter and everyone is saying she's beautiful, wonderful and has such wise eyes, whereas I'm looking at the photos and wondering how the hell they can say such things with a straight face. It takes all my willpower to not post "she looks like an ugly old Inca dude" underneath a couple.
candycane_girl
Ugh, one of my friends seems to be in the process of posting pics of her kid for each month that she has been alive. I think we're going into month three. The baby...isn't ugly but she isn't cute. I don't know. I've seen some really cute babies but I hate when people oooh and awww just because it's a baby.
girltrouble
ugly inca dude... lilac, you kill me.
pollystyrene
LeBoy's second lab test came back clear! We are now 100% childfree forever!

I bought some stuff for his gift basket. The stuff from goodvibes hasn't come in yet, but I got the movie today and I think I'm having buyer's remorse. It was recommended by Violet Blue, but from the cover, it looks kinda skeezy. Not that I was looking for softcore stuff, but this doesn't look like what I was expecting.
doodlebug
Ooh, congrats, polly and leboy! I'm totally happy for your forthcoming sex life! Sex with Soulman is so much more exciting for me, without that element of risk.... wink.gif
designermedusa
Great news polly and leboy.

Mr. DM had his vasectomy on Thursday. The doctor had prescribed some pain medication to take before the procedure, and that made Mr. DM sweat and feel really sick to his stomache. Other than that he said there was no pain, and he hasn't even needed to take tylenol. He has a follow up appointment next week, and then two lab tests, one in a month and one another month after that.

angie_21
Sometimes the risk makes it kind of hot too though smile.gif but there are still things I miss about being on the BCP.

Congrats dm and polly! I am so jealous right now.

Oh yeah, this weekend at a family gathering, which included many babies, my sweetie's uncle asked me three times when we would be getting to work on one for ourselves. He got an emphatic "no thank you" each time. It was less annoying since I knew he was doing it to bug me on purpose, but still... I always feel they really do mean it, just a little bit.
missladyj
congrats polly and dm!
candycane_girl
I just wanted to come in here and complain not really about kids but rather about parents. I definitely believe that the way parents act influences the kids and based on the parents I saw today, the kids are going to grow up with a huge sense of entitlement and will generally be assholes.

I'm volunteering in my city's local theatre festival and today I was at the venue that is especially for kiddie shows. The festival has very strict rules such as no latecomers and no re-admittance if you leave the theatre, etc. So I'm sitting there with two other people (one volunteer and one actual employee) when this woman tries to walk into the theatre with her daughter. The employee (whom I'll just call Bosslady) had to stop her. This is basically how it went down.

bosslady: Sorry ma'am, you can't go in there.
woman: But we were already in there.
bosslady: I'm sorry but there is no re-admittance once you leave the theatre, it's the festival's rules.
woman: I had to take my daughter to the bathroom.
bosslady: Well actually, there is a bathroom right in the theatre so you didn't have to leave.

Woman storms off and sits on the steps to wait for her husband and other kid to come out. To make things better, the two women I was working with had noted that this woman had actually gone to get a snack for her kid and they didn't just go to the bathroom. And then the kid, who had been silent, starts crying about how she wants to go back and see the show. The mother does nothing to soothe her or quiet her down and instead stands right in front of us, holding her crying kid and glaring at us. After maybe 10 minutes the show lets out and the woman loudly complains to her husband about how we wouldn't let her back in and the husband also glares at us about how "ridiculous" that is and the woman goes on and on about how "offended" she was. Give me a freakin break.

It should be noted that while all of the patrons are in line (and everyone has to be in line whether they bought advanced tickets or whatever) the bosslady gives a spiel about the basic rules about no latecomers, no re-admittance, no snacks, etc. She also says that there is a washroom in the theatre. Also, she informed me that the washroom is clearly marked with a NEON sign.

And one last thing about this woman. She and her child appeared to be coming in off the street. Even if they had used the other washroom (which was in the venue but not inside the theatre area) they would have been inside the venue. So this woman actually leaves the entire venue, not just the theatre, and then gets pissed about not getting back in.

Then there was mom #2. The rules for tickets are that you can purchase tickets in advance up to 3 hours before a show. After that you simply have to show up an hour before showtime to buy tickets. It clearly states on the website that if you buy tickets in advance you can only pick them up an hour before showtime.

mom #2: Hi, I'm here to pick up some tickets.
bosslady: Well actually we can't sell tickets until an hour before showtime.
mom #2: But I already bought them and they said I could pick them up anytime.
bosslady: Actually you can pick them up anytime up until 3 hours before showtime, after that you have to wait until exactly 1 hour before showtime, we can give you the tickets in 3 minutes.
mom #2: I have to wait for 3 minutes?
bosslady: Yes, sorry, those are the rules.
mom #2: This is ridiculous.
bosslady: Well, just two more minutes. Sorry, I can't bend the rules for anyone.
mom #2: Well, I wanted to get these two (her sons) something to eat before the show, I just want to make sure we have time.
bosslady: Don't worry, you have plenty of time.

I understand that having to wait 3 minutes might seem silly. But I don't understand why people don't understand the concept of rules. If you bend the rules for one person then you end up bending them for another person. And if one person doesn't want to wait 3 minutes then the next person won't want to wait for 5 minutes and on and on until the whole system is fucked up. And to make it even more hilarious, this woman got her tickets and then walked down the street and started chit chatting with someone for 5 minutes. All that after freaking out about having to wait 3 minutes. Gawd, I hate people. But what I really hate are these self-righteous assholes who think that they own the universe and that having children somehow makes them more important.

Gag me with a spoon. And sorry for writing a novel.
designermedusa
ccgirl, that first mother is a perfect example about how many people with children just think the world revolves around them. She probably thought if she let the child cry then your bosslady would give in, I'm glad she didn't.

About the waiting three minutes thing, I can totally relate. I used to work at a movie theatre, and people would show up like 30 minutes before we opened, and would want to buy tickets. The majority of people got an attitude when we told them to come back later.
auralpoison
OMG, this is exactly what I came in here to bitch about. JUST BECAUSE YOU PROPAGATED DOES NOT MEAN THE WORLD BOWS DOWN TO YOU! You do not deserve special treatment just because you sprouted crotchfruit!
angie_21
candy, I am so glad to hear they didn't give in! That's so rare these days. I don't know why people have that sense of entitlment now, specifically about having children. I know your life is hard now because you CHOSE to have children, maybe you should have thought of that earlier! You're not doing the human race any favours by procreating, believe me, in fact I think you owe us.

We were eating dinner while on the road yesterday when a couple walked into the restaurant with THREE BOYS of different ages, and the girl (she looked nineteen!) was about to pop with a fourth. And the oldest kid was at least 6 years old. To quote my boyfriend, the guy looked like a skinhead white supremacist. They walked in and got a table and sat down, then the mother took all the boys to the bathroom, then they left. I'm assuming they were just there to use the washroom.. but it was so weird. I told my guy, honey, that right there is my idea of hell. to which he responded, I think their mother would agree with you. I know some women choose that kind of life, but I do wonder with that many kids and a mother that young, how much of a say did she really have?
sassy
You know what is really annoying? On the 4th of July, when I checked my facebook page, the several new mothers I am friends with all had their status as "NAME wishes people would stop shooting off fireworks because my baby is taking a nap." Who cares if your baby is sleeping?? That means that everyone else has to not celebrate a national holiday? Geez.
candycane_girl
angie, I think part of the reason that parents have that sense of entitlement is because so many people would have just given in. But at least with this festival the rules are totally enforced and the house managers are very strict.

sassy, did you ever go to that STFU Parents site? It's full of Facebook updates like that. Also, if most babies nap in the afternoon wouldn't that mean that people were setting off fireworks in daylight? I have to admit, I find that a bit stupid. However, I also found it stupid when people were setting off fireworks the day before Canada Day and then still setting them off at 2am.

My family has a dog and it's not fun for him when people are setting off fireworks on holidays. He cries and shakes for a few hours. But we don't go around telling people they shouldn't set off fireworks. It's one day. The baby will get over it.
angie_21
Those complaints are especially silly because they aren't about the baby, it's about the inconvenience of having to go in and calm their baby during naptime when they wanted to be doing something else!

I read the STFU post about the girl who dropped her baby off the couch. I know there things happen, but her friends responses were just scary!
treehugger
Reason #10,473 not to have children...spinach dip and pumpernickel bread for supper. And beer. Yum......
thepointybird
QUOTE(treehugger @ Jul 8 2009, 11:23 PM) *
Reason #10,473 not to have children...spinach dip and pumpernickel bread for supper. And beer. Yum......


Ha, yes, my dinner the other night consisted of 3 fat slices of creamy Stilton and half a bottle of Pinot Grigio. If I had kids, I'd have to, like, cook and shit.....
girltrouble
worse than that, pointy-- you'd have to SHARE.

i couldn't do it. i just couldn't. stilton is goood.
angie_21
I'm trying to imagine

a) paying for a babysitter every. friday. night.
cool.gif being home to cook dinner (instead of pizza at the pub) and go get the babysitter, then finally go out and meet my freinds who are already 4 beers ahead of me, which doesn't matter because I have to be home sober soon to drive the babysitter home for her 11 pm curfew..
c) 9 months of being my boyfriend's DD. no thank you. I think partly I refuse to ever have children just because it's so freakin' biologically unfair to women!
turbojenn
We've got SIL, BIL and their 2 kids staying with us this week/end. They are *awesome* kids, well behaved, funny as hell, good manners, but DAMN - Day 2 and I am exhausted! Of course we're doing lots of things and seeing the city, and it's fun to see the city I live in through a 4 year old's eyes, who's never seen a CITY before, that takes more energy than the average parenting weekend, but it's a different level of energy than I'm used to. Fun to cook for them, though - my nephie is celiac, too, so he loves that I make "special" things for him, and he's way more adventurous in trying things I cook than he normally would be (he tends to be afraid of new foods, after being sick for the first 3 years of his life).

And Sunday afternoon after they leave, I am planning some excellent portions, and a colossal nap! smile.gif
doodlebug
Just another random pressure-to-breed rant......

Last night Soulman and I had a performance. Afterwards, we went to see a friend play in a jazz band, right? I work with this sax player. So I'm telling him how I'm not truly happy at our mutual workplace, and that I really want to pursue music. He starts trying to talk me out of it, telling me a story about how he chose family over a potential career as a professional/chance to see the world 18 years ago. (Well, to be honest, there's no money in jazz.) And basically how I'd be foolish to give up such a great job ("best employer in the WORLD," he says) for music.

THEN he starts going on and on about how I may want to start a family. No matter how many times I told him this was not in the cards, that I've NEVER wanted kids, he couldn't fathom it, kept insisting things change....he is a really sweet, kind guy, but I really felt pushed. I could see in his eyes that he didn't believe I could possibly be that certain. Especially b/c he and his wife just had a 2nd baby, 17 years after the 1st, and they're both 40, as I am.

But I wonder if maybe he was trying to validate his choices. He chose family and to remain an amateur, right? I mean, of course he's also filled with love for his wife and new child, and he wants the whole world to share his beautiful experience. But at the same time, I wonder if he has a little regret that might make him advocate more strongly for others to follow in his footsteps....? Then again, they are both immigrants from Hungary - maybe they are a bit more old fashioned about these things?

Anyway. It's so weird that I have made it to 40 and there are STILL people insisting that I will probably change my mind, and/or have major regrets if I don't breed. I am FORTY. I gave up my life - poured my entire heart and soul into it - for a social justice cause for almost a dozen years, and now I finally get to do what I want....make music. Now I'm starting to make a little money, and there is a huge potential to make more, and to possibly scale back the day job to part-time by fall or winter, and maybe, eventually, start travelling and making a career out of it. Even my bass player, who is Mr. Naysayer about everything and quite hard on me in a Henry Higgins-sort of way, has finally admitted that I could make a pretty fine living as a working musician. I have The Voice. Everyone tells me so, but I don't need them to tell me. I know what I've got, and I can see people's reactions when I'm singing for myself. I've wanted to be a professional musician since I was a tiny child. NOT a mommy!!

Why do people try to squash your dreams? Why do they use family as an excuse for abandoning dreams?

Oh yeah, and what is with the "Don't you like kids?" Of course I like kids! I love them! Some of my dearest friends are kids. I was right beside my best friend while her kids were growing up. My bass player's six year old is totally my little sister, and I tell her so. But that doesn't mean I want or need one of my own, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If that happened, then NO, I probably wouldn't like them.

I think I'm gonna start telling people I'm infertile. I don't know if that would stop some of them, though. They might start telling me about fertility options. Then, I COULD tell them the truth - that Soulman had a vasectomy - but would that even stop them? ARRRGHH!!!

It's going to be weird enough for me when Soulman's grown kids (17 and 23) have kids of their own. I'll be like a gramma. EEK!
stargazer
How frustrating, Doodle. mad.gif I think I've learned that some people have a hard time being receptive to others choices. I think alot of it has to do with the brainwashing and how socially conditioned we've become that the roles we choose in life (single, partner, mother, childfree) are roles where there is no choice. We have to become these roles as a result of rigid, "traditional" (whatever that means) expectations of society, especially in the area of what it means to be feminine and a woman. If we are not willing to fit that passe patriarchial created role, then people will scramble to try to fix their perceived problem or worse, analyze you, for being childfree.

I'm glad you've made the choice to pursue your dream. Your story has been really inspiring to me. Rock on, Doodle!
girltrouble
from what you said, doodle, i think he was DEFINITELY revisiting his choices, more than he was giving you real advise. anyone else who was listening objectively, would, i think, ask the downside, and how long you've been thinking about it. as you point out, you're not some teenager who doesn't know what she wants. as aural would say, you're a grown ass woman. it's absurd to think your baby timer is gonna go off tomorrow. it sounds to me like that question was one that hit a landmine. he made that call so long ago, as you said, and he's had his doubts/regrets/remorse. i'd lay dollars to donuts that he's always regretted it, no matter how much he loves his family. this conversation, for him at least, morphed into a reassuring pep talk about his family. you....weren't really part of it.

if i may give you a little advise-- no matter how unhappy you are about work, never, ever tell anyone you work with. you never know when or if it may come back to bite you in the ass. people talk. no, you know where you wanna go, play things close to the vest at work, so you can leave on your time schedule, your terms, and not theirs.

oh, and doodle, FUCKING GO FOR IT! i'm with star-- you've been inspiring to me too, and you know we're all rooting for you! wub.gif
candycane_girl
doodle just...ugh! I agree with GT and Star, he was definitely revisiting the decisions he made and probably trying to justify them to himself.

There's one other issue that got to me and this might be a bit un-PC to say but I'm just going to say it. Since you're forty, even if you suddenly woke up tomorrow and decide that you do want a kid wouldn't it be quite risky? I mean, there's a chance that you just wouldn't get pregnant anyway. I know that a lot of advances have been made in the medical field but I think it would be quite a risk to take on.

It also bugs me that even though you've gone this long without wanting children people still think that you'll suddenly change your mind. You're a grown woman and you've made your wishes clear and yet it's like people still don't take it seriously! If you were a man I doubt that anyone would bother you about it.
sybarite
Doodle, I too agree his comments were all about his situation (and possible regrets). What does it say about some parents that they project their unspoken doubts on to others? I can understand that speaking up and saying you regret having children is somewhat taboo (not least because of the hurt it could cause children) but projecting those doubts onto others who have thought through and are happy with their choices is out of order too. (I seem to remember a French writer wrote an article in which she said she regretted having children; I must try and dig it up, although I have the feeling it was discussed here before...)

A friend of mine said something truly awesome to me after she had her baby, who was very much planned and wanted. She was and is happy being a parent, but said that she could better understand my decision to not have children now she knew the work involved. She admitted it would be hard to devote yourself to other fulfilling work, at least for a while, after having a kid. It was such an awesome and generous thing to say, and I felt both our perspectives were widened and strengthened by our talk. I wish more people could have that broader perspective.
treehugger
Doodle...just tell him you're barren. And use that term..."barren"...cause it will make him wilt inside and not bring it up again. wink.gif
pollystyrene
Just get one of these t-shirts and people will leave you alone.
girltrouble
or you could punch him in the head.

i love the double meaning in those shirts, poly.
pollystyrene
I second GT's suggestion, too. The t-shirt is meant more as a pre-emptive strategy, but if someone's gonna argue with you, a punch in the head is the next option.

Tell him that you're afraid that you'd become a sanctimonious prick too, if you had kids.
doodlebug
God/dess, I am SO glad this thread exists in the universe!

GT, I'm not to worried about admitting not being happy to this fellow. He asked me, and when I hesitated to answer, he said, "I'm not happy. Nobody I talk to is happy there. I don't know why. It's the best employer in the world."

I suspect maybe there is something more going on there, for sure. I worked with his wife for awhile - in an ironic twist, I am temping for her maternity leave. I asked her once whether she fell in love with the saxaphone because she loved him, or if she fell in love with him because he was a sax player. She giggled and blushed, 20 years after the moment, and said, "Because he was a sax player." They met in a JAZZ CLUB, for heaven's sake.

So I guess in retrospect, his speech really was all about him, hey? And yet, his own wife would LOVE for him to go back to music - Soulman and I can both see it in her eyes. And I feel like his eyes were sad, Friday night, when he was trying to talk me out of it.

And I'm so GRATEFUL you women are here. Just being able to read this this weekend has been wonderful, so reinforcing that OF COURSE I'm doing the right thing, and I just have to learn to cut through the naysayers.

Busties, the gig offers just don't stop coming! How can I not follow my heart when the money is even telling me yes? This, I sometimes think, is EXACTLY why I needed/wanted to remain childfree....so I could contribute something to the world that I felt was important (the women's rights cause), and then ramble on to pursue my heart's desire, without any constraints, any restrictions, any doubts.....
girltrouble
hey aural? have you figured out what you are going to get for hipster douchebaby for his birthday? i suppose it would be easier if his parents didn't keep changing his name and his birthday according to hipsterparent magazine's articles. at any rate, i think i've settled upon my gift, here. i'm hoping that it will literally scare the crap out of him so i can spend most of his birthday pretending i'm nelson from the simpsons, pointing and laughing.
auralpoison
No, but HDB had to be bargained with to go to bed tonight . . . if he didn't go to beddy-bye he wouldn't be allowed to listen to ACDC the next day. I AM DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS HERE.
thepointybird
QUOTE(auralpoison @ Jul 21 2009, 05:20 AM) *
No, but HDB had to be bargained with to go to bed tonight . . . if he didn't go to beddy-bye he wouldn't be allowed to listen to ACDC the next day. I AM DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS HERE.


Oh my Maude AP, I know these people are your friends, but they sound nightmarish! This modern thing of bargaining with your children just mystifies me. I remember reading some article in the Guardian where the journalist was talking about how he didn't tell his kids to tidy up their rooms, he 'negotiated' with them - basically bribing them to do shit. rolleyes.gif Well done, Dickweed. You're not going to think that's so cute when you've got a 14yo with a sense of entitlement coming out of his ears telling you that he's not gonna clean up after himself unless you buy him a new iPod. When my brother and I were young, our parents' approach was 'fix up your bedroom NOW or you can live in the pigsty. Oh, and you better not come complaining to us when you can't find whatever toy/book you're looking for'. As such, we both grew up with a sense of responsibility and a tendency to look after our stuff properly in the realisation that it would last longer that way. It's not rocket science, parents!
pollystyrene
Oh, god, the negotiations. Like LeSIL trying to get her kid to eat that night we were there a few weeks ago. First it was, "Eat the pizza because I'm not making you chicken nuggets or peanut butter and jelly and you're not getting a cupcake." Then it was, "Have 5 bites of the pizza and if you really don't like it, I'll make you chicken nuggets or PB & J." Then it was, "If I let you eat in the living room with your train movie on, will you try the pizza?"....eventually that's what worked, but that kind of crap would not have flown when I was growing up. Sit down, shut up and eat. LeSIL wonders why her kids walk all over her.
candycane_girl
I can't get over the whole negotiation thing! I'm kind of hoping that by the time people my age start having kids that there will be a backlash to this whole "my child is a precious unique snowflake who doesn't need rules" way of thinking. I told my mom your story, polly, and she thought it was ridiculous. She and I both agree that the choices for the kid should be eat or starve.
missladyj
I went with my sister and two year old niece to the pool. I kept telling her to walk , instead of saying don't run. When she wouldn't listen to me, I grabbed her hand and then she HAD to walk. when I went to go, my sis asks her if she wants to give me a kiss, she said no, so I grabbed her and kissed her anyway. Like she has a choice. I don't ask her I tell her. She is two !

We went on vacation with another couple and every time my friend saw a child behaving horribly, she would simply say
"Savages!" So now I am all about calling children SAVAGES!
thepointybird
I trust you have all heard this story? Second paragraph down, sorry I can't find a better link...

http://www.energy.gs/2008/10/troubled-german-cyclists.html


flanker_ji
Holy crap... nope, hadn't heard about that. Sheesh.
missladyj
WAs at a street fair yesterday. Every parent had a ginormous stroller and a dog. I was way more interested in their dogs. I wanted to post in my facewank status. "Missladyj is more interested in your dog than your kid." but decided against that post. Of course once it got later and the parents took their no neck monsters home it was much better and I was less annoyed.
candycane_girl
So apparently there's some kind of event for women who blog called Blog Her. Of course, since it's aimed at women bloggers a lot of the bloggers who attend this convention are mommy bloggers and the Blog Her convention is really kid and baby friendly. Anyway, I guess a lot of corporations try to get in good with the bloggers in hopes of advertising opportunities or something.

Anyhoo, Nikon threw a cocktail party and invited various women bloggers to the event although technically it was not associated with Blog Her. Some women expected to be able to bring their babies along and were turned away because it was a cocktail party and was only suitable for adults. So now the majority of mommy bloggers are having a shit fit! Cause y'know, it's totally appropriate to bring a baby to a freakin cocktail party!

Link is here.

Also, pointybird, that story is ridiculous!!
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