Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: BustSecret: Ordinary Confessions from Extraordinary Busties
The BUST Lounge > Forums > As the World Turns
Pages: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100, 101, 102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 110, 111, 112, 113, 114, 115, 116, 117, 118
pepper
oh girl, don't we all want that? le sigh, i do anyhow. avec enormous diamond ring and everything.
but only if he'll respect me in the morning too ;o)

freckleface2727
zoya-
I have that, and believe me, it's not at all what it's cracked up to be from the inside.
I want MORE.

this is not who- I- am.
mandolyn
um, yup. me too. i've had a knight in shining armor for 30 years. someday i hope to actually realize he's my one true love.

i can't believe i just wrote that. ack.

just want to say that i heart this thread -{major kudos to zora for starting it! - and every.single.one.of.youze. even poor gator with his mayonnaise issues. but please don't be offended if i don't respond. i'm reading lots of these posts over and over, and my heart breaks a little more each time. but just like the letters thread, i feel hella guilty singling any one person out for the love.

(((group hug)))
missladyj
I pee in the shower at the health club
toP that all you shower pissers!

I have to eat all the same colored sweettarts together

when I eat frozen veggies I have to eat the lima beans first, then the carrots , then I can eat the corn, green beans and peas together


I have always loved to look at myself in the mirror.

i am vain and worry about what happens if I lose my looks

I have four pieces of artwork in my home that are of me

I have two more pieces of artwork of me that I want framed and up in the house.

I want to commission an artist I like to draw me.

when I go to other peoples houses I notice ifthere are not mirrors so that I can look at my self

when I go to other peoples houses in their bathrooms I always look to see what is in the medicine cabinet and open any cabinets and drawers. I am just curious.

I would love to spend my days snorting coke and drinking champagne

I can't bear to read super long confessions
crazyoldcatlady
i went into the bathroom of a fancy country club, in a fancy dress, at a fancy event, with fancy and important people, and puked in the stall because i was too drunk. this was last night.

i think about this thread daily and keep a running inner monologue about my own sins.

erinjane
Like missladyj, and rantrave, I'm also vain and like to look at myself in the mirror. I worry about being conceited because my best friend tells me I'm the prettiest of all our friends and I agree. (not that I think my friends aren't pretty, they're all gorgeous.)
lilacwine13
Zoya, there are times when I feel the same way, even though I know I would go out of my mind if all I had to do was stay at home and keep house.

I think about my only reason for keeping my relationship going is because AZ Guy wants to be a stay at home dad, which is good because I would go nuts if I did that. I don't have much of a parenting instinct, and am not even sure if I want to have kids.

Even though I know we have a childfree thread and know people at work the who feel the same way, I sometimes feel like there's something wrong with me because I every time I see a baby I don't turn to mush, but baby animals do that to me.

Oh, and I'm hopelessly addicted to Cute Overload.

And any candy like Sweetarts or M&M's, I have to eat them color by color, usually saving the red or blue ones for last.
lucizoe
Sometimes I want to write really really really really snarky replies to the newbies who clearly have never read the magazine, clearly have no idea how the board dynamic functions, and clearly cannot be bothered to read the rules on the first page of the board.

And then I take a deep breath and back away because mostly they're just naive and not ill-intentioned.

I'm still bothered by it, though.
culturehandy
When I eat candy, I have to have one of every colour, particularly when I am having the last of anything, this includes cereal (like Froot Loops), and especially applies to jube jubes.
pollystyrene
Sometimes I feel that my life is a series of mistakes and failures.

And when something does work out, afterwards I endlessly question whether it was really the right move to begin with.
peterbilt
Sometimes I feel like pollystyrene is living my life.
bklynhermit
i love bitching about people's places in the home tours on www.apartmenttherapy.com

i say the most terrible things about people and their homes. and usually the resident actually reads the threads there, so they get to read my terrible screeds about how they have no style and are just rich assholes who bought the entire Design Within Reach catalogue.

what else, what else?

i think all three of my brothers are white trash.

i once had a crush on this girl, and then one day she wore a low cut tank top and i saw that she had coarse black hairs growing down her chest between her breasts. i stopped being attracted to her right then. and i'm one of those hairy-leg advocate type feminists who doesn't believe in removing any body hair whatsoever.

i'm currently unemployed and have no interest in looking for a job, especially since i'll be going back to my original job in august. seriously, i'm really tempted to feign looking all summer and just be 2 months behind on rent. even though it would be completely unfair to my roommate.
obelix
I lie. I have developed a reputation as being absolutely horrible at lying, and everybody buys it. Because of this, I can lie to all of my friends and they believe me.
lunasol
wow. this thread is ... amazing. actually, my first confession is that this threa makes me feel better about myself. which is not to say i feel better than anyone here, but it's nice to know i'm not the only one feeling and doing many of these things.

i just wrote a whole bunch of other stuff, and then deleted it. i guess that's my other confession: i'm a coward. maybe next time.

in the meantime, big props and thanks to everyone else with the guts to post.
humanist77
Ooo I want to play! Why didn't I notice this thread earlier?

I LOVE to speed while driving even though I know how dangerous it is and I know I will get caught eventually. I know I have to stop.

um..I will post more as I think of them..
pepper
i call the police on my neighbours.
i leave anonymous notes on their doors and windshields about leaving garbage and other junk in the hallways, parking in the no parking emergency spot and wheelchair access parking outside, and for throwing cigarette butts on the ground around the building. i call the building manager whenever something happens and tell her who did it.
i also give the teenagers and their visitors shit, like i really tell them off in a nasty way when i catch them up to no good.
maybe this makes me a bad neighbour but i just don't care. i live here with my kid and i refuse to put up with it.
i am such a bitch.


oh, and the last boy i went out with i used for sex for the last three months of a year together before breaking up with him even though he kept telling me that he was in love with me and i didn't feel anything for him anymore.
that was mean.
pollystyrene
Oh, I just remembered this one!

When I was in college and really depressed, it made me hyper-sexual. Anytime I wasn't in class or working, and my roommate wasn't around, I'd use her computer to find fairly raunchy erotica on the internet and jerk off right at her desk, wearing just a bathrobe. I never touched the keyboard with the hand I used or anything, but it was still a pretty rude thing to do, and not something I'm proud of now.

Unfortunately, I haven't had that same level of horniness with the current round of depression.:-)

P.S. I don't think that makes you a bitch, pepper- I hate my rude neighbors!
missladyj
I started posting with out ever going to the Newbie thread
lunasol
i'm a horrible snob. if i think someone's not smart enough, i can't even be bothered with them. this is really, really bad given my line of work. it's something i should get over, but i actually don't want to get over it.

and in general, i've become lately the kind of person who just can't be bothered with people i don't like. in many ways, this is a good thing, because i used to be way too concerned what others thought of me, but i worry i'm becoming the bad kind of bitch.
alligator
Sometimes when we touch, the honesty's too much. And I have to close my eyes and hide.

There. I said it.
alligator
Ok, a real one...

My enthusiasm for 80s Euro-disco and gay club music has begun to frighten me.

I call up radio stations and request Ken Laszlo's "Hey Hey Guy." I know the words to Scotch's "Disco Band" and Alan Ross's "Valentino Mon Amour." I find myself thinking, 'That song would be pretty funky if Lime reworked it as a HiNRG dance track.' This is not healthy. At this rate I'm going to have to re-subscribe to Guns & Ammo to re-butch myself...
raisingirl
I LOVE HOUSE MUSIC AND I DON'T CARE IF THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS IT!

I'm still undecided, but I really don't think I'm going to call my mom today. She's been a pain in the ass lately. And, well, not like my inaction is going to teach her a lesson, but I can't be bothered with the obligation. Maybe the guilt will make me change my mind later this afternoon, but I'm not holding my breath.
miss_jane
I can't be bothered to call me dad and it puts me in a bad mood when he calls and i have to talk to him.
voodoo_princess
I am very leary of "alligator"s and don't think I like posting in this thread anymore.... see you all somewhere else.
raisingirl
Okay, more. I mean, I love them both because they're my parents, but I love my dad way more than my mom. He means the world to me, even though I've never been "Daddy's little girl" in the traditional and icky sense. I like hanging out with him, even if we're just laughing over bad TV or going to the library together.
culturehandy
I'll never have children because I don't want to be my mother.
zoya
I have a crush on an employee of mine who I am seriously old enough to be his mother. And not in a "well technically I could be your mother if I had you at 14" kind of way. Like I REALLY am old enough to be his mother.

acually, all the girls I work with have a crush on him. And we all could be his mother.
venetia
I have a soup phobia and I didn't even know it. All my life I've struggled to justify why "I hate soup" given that soup isn't a flavour or anything.

I try to learn the word for soup in other languages just to make sure I can avoid it.

If I even find out that someone used packet soup in the non-soup cooking (eg a sauce) then I don't want to eat it. I was staring in secret horror at a rice stir fry because M had put soup mix in it and he pointed out that I have this phobia. I feel like such a loser about this, for some reason.
saktii
voodoo--
no need to be leary of Alligator! He's been here for years. he once even sent me a b-day card with a dragon on it.
koala
I seriously wonder if I love my brother anymore. He's done a lot of shit to my parents and I.

I would love to move away. I love my friends and my parents to death, but I want to move away from all the drama. I wanna have friendships that aren't so "high school"

Everyday in third grade, I was attacked by a fellow classmate on te playground. He would push me down, lay on top of me and hump me. Sometimes I ran, sometimes i got away, sometimes i fought, sometimes i just lated there. I hate my teacher for telling me to go play after a particularly violent attack. When I changed schools the following year because we moved, i would have panic attacks and "stomach aches" right when i pulled up to school. My parents dont know. I want to tell my parents, but i don't know how they would react.

oh if i only had more time
zoya
oh god, I just thought of this one..

when my brother and I were like 8 and 9, we used to have a big playroom in the house, and there were a few times that we hid in the closet and kissed, because we thought we should be practicing for when we grew up and had boyfriends and girlfriends.
misspissed
i was a bully in grammar school.

i did a 180 in junior high, and became an absolute introvert.

it wasn't until my mid 20s that i finally felt balanced out.
tyger
i won't read posts if i have to scroll through it. unless it's a certain shade of purple that i miss seeing every day.

i'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend but i'm scared that more than a little of it is that i just don't want anyone else to have him.

i don't know who my brother is. he lives in a room right next to me and i don't know him anymore.

i love my mother and i like her, too, but sometimes i wish i could me her brain to mouth filter.

i graduated highschool last year and i feel old. i'm terrified of what it will be like to remember things that happened 30 years ago.

i lie so much there are few people who actually know who i am. and i think i like it better this way.

sometimes all i want to do is stay in my bed for weeks on end, surviving on tea and nyquil.
pollystyrene
Oh, I was reminded of some more...

When I was little, there were all those celebrities coming out and saying they had repressed memories of sexual abuse. There was some psychologist on TV saying that it's not safe to assume you weren't sexually abused because you could just be repressing memories of it. Ever since then, I've been really paranoid about that and over the past 15 years or so have probably spent hours trying to think of every man I came in contact with the first 10 or so years of my life who could have abused me- everyone from family, close and distant; friend's brothers or fathers, teachers, everyone, racking my brain for repressed memories of anything that may have happened. It's really disturbing and nothing's come of it.

Also, when I was in sixth grade, my teacher was really a very popular teacher, kids looked forard to having this guy. He was sort of a white Bill Cosby- told funny stories, had lots of good activities and assignments and was sort of a "grandfatherly type". I was a really crappy student and one day, after not paying attention during math (my worst subject) when he let us work on the assignment and I didn't understand it, I picked up my book and was trying to figure it out. He saw this and took me into the hall and yelled at me for not paying attention when I should have been and when I stammered for an excuse (even if I had been paying attention, I still wouldn't have gotten it) he told me "to stop giving him this song and dance" and he slapped me. Across the face. Not like hard enough to knock me down or anything, but enough to sting. He did it another time, too, but I don't remember what I had done to make him do it. He also lied to me and told me that he and my parents had talked about my academic performance and decided that if I stayed on the path I was on, I would be a high-school drop out. It made me feel like my parents were against me (that's probably why I didn't tell them about him hitting me) and when I told me mom about what he said a few years later, she was shocked and said they never said anything like that and never would. I only told my best friend about him hitting me, no one else.

A couple of years ago, I went to Midnight Mass at my boyfriend's church and this teacher was in the choir (he happened to live in the same town as me and my bf.) All of this stuff came back to me and it took all I had in me to not make a scene in the middle of mass and storm out. About a year later, the asswipe was in physical therapy at the same time as I was at the local hospital. Argh. Can't get away.

Also, I agree- Alligator's posts are getting annoying and really belittling to the people who are putting themselves on the line in this thread. Alligator, I don't get it- maybe I'm not looking in the right places, but you don't seem to be acting tr**lish anywhere else? What gives?

Voodoo, I hope you can find the strength to come back!
pepper
eek, polly, wow. that is horrific girlin, you ok?
the nerve of some peeps eh? the over steppin' nerve.
makes you wonder what who-ever did to them to make them so fucked.
at least what they all did to me made me stronger and less of a mess. i think so anyhow. i hope so anyhow!

once again i proven to myself that i can't just get away with one glass of wine. i am going to have another one, and i have already prolly had two too many as it is. this may be a problem..
auralpoison
I totally get off on having cars towed from my parking spot. Seriously. I sat around for an hour & a half last night waiting for the tow truck to arrive & when it did & they hauled the car away... I swear I fucking came. Park in my space motherfuckers & it'll cost you.

Also, I loathe my mother & didn't call her for Mother's Day for the second year in a row. She called me all crying & shit trying to make me feel bad. Newsflash: You have no currency with me, bitch. Give it up.
electric
ohmigod.
best. thread. ever.
i was *this* close to just doing a leave-of-absence. Not in a flouncy, fuck ya'll kinda a way. Just a 'crap, there's a lot going on right now and I'm not online and maybe that's a good thing' way.

But I'll be back... I need to get a good post in head first.
sybarite
I went on a township tour in Africa and didn't donate money at the end of it. I was running out, thousands of miles from home and dependent on my bf who I was fighting with, so I panicked. But whatever I felt I needed any remaining money for, they needed it more. I still feel really shitty about this. I would send them cash or a cheque but it probably would never reach the community.

I have been longing to go out and drink wine with any group of fun people, get twisted and dance to bad music from a jukebox. Instead at weekends my bf and I lurk at home watching stuff on various screens, or occasionally I meet a girlfriend and we talk about serious somber stuff like childbearing, co-habiting and alcohol abuse. I'm bored and becoming boring.

I want my bf to take me away to a hotel, drink champagne with me and fuck me senseless for 48 hours. I can't see this happening but I don't know why.
mandolyn
i got riproaring drunk and puked in my husband's boss's girlfriend's bathroom. all over the rug. which i rolled up very neatly ... and demurely hid in her bathtub and pulled the shower curtain. didn't say a word, but i'm sure they figured out i was the culprit. i avoided them for a really long time. finally sucked it up and faced them at the 2004 company xmas party. i'm sure they both still skeeve me.

go ahead and laugh. i'm cringing like hell typing this, but it is funny.
voodoo_princess
pollystyrene - thanks and I'm glad someone else has noticed the tone of "alligator"s posts.... The things that are being posted here are extremely personal and heart felt and, for some, a theraputic way to deal...... I just think it's extremely direspectful and trite for someone (man or woman) to come into this particular thread with the intention of making snide remarks and ignorant quips and NOT participating seriously in the theme of this thread. Based on some of what I've read here, this is very important to many people who post here and it WAS important to me to be able to come here and "air my dirty laundry" so to speak and I was really trying to work myself up to getting some more serious skeletons out of my closet but now..... I feel uncomfortable.... invaded.... whatever. I would no longer feel safe posting anything more serious than "peeing in the shower" (that's my fave!).....
I too have noticed that there is no other thread in which "alligator" feels the need to remark in such a way. Why this one? Why such a personal one? Some of those coming here are already hurt by one thing or another. They DON"T need to be hurt by someone HERE, in a place that should be safe for posting thoughts and feelings without judgment or belittlement. Maybe I am too sensitive or whatever, but when I come into a thread and the remarks made by one certain person makes me cringe and be leary of posting my "real" thoughts and feeling, that's just not cool.
girlygirlgag
I think Alligator is *trying* to be funny.
culturehandy
I wanted to stay out of this, but I agree with Voodoo_princess. Its like laughing when you hear that someone's parent died because of a drunk driver. I think that alligator should, and dare I say it? Should not post anything so disrespectful or merely lurk only if he has nothing of importance to post. With that said I don't want anyone to be weary about posting here.

I threw around the idea for this thread as a way for people to get things anonymously off thier chest. I wouldn't have had the idea if there were any pesky trolls around. I just thought it would be a good place for people to get even the smallest thing off thier chest and feel better, I have done some crap-ass things in my time, and had no way to get it off my chest without being judged. I know that the busties are non-judgemental. To me it doesn't matter how small or trivial you think something is, if it is bothering you, then this is the place to get it off off your chest. Anything that bothers a person can turn into a festering internal wound. So post away, and please don't be afraid.

That's all.

Now let me see, what else can I get off of my chest. I backed my car into a post and lied about it, said it was a hit and run, because I couldn't afford the fine on my licence.

alligator
Everybody,

I sent off some private messages to "explain" myself but since more people are talking about it, I'm going to drop a brief note here.

To start, I am a joke-telling sort of guy. It's just my nature. That said, my jokes focus on situations, not people. There is no disrespectful intent or desire to belittle, harass, threaten or what have you.

(That's why my first "confession" was about being covered in mayonnaise; a patently absurd, self-deprecating image poking fun at the very idea of confessions, not any person in particular.)

Reading the other items here, this thread did (and still does) NOT come across to me as "heavy" like some of the others and especially not a flashing-red No Joke Zone like Survivors' Space. So I made with the funny.

I seem to have misjudged that. I apologize for any grief - although let's be clear that there was (is) no malice behind my goofing around. I'll make the same promise to you all that I did to PollyS - only genuine confessional items from now on. I can't promise they'll have "importance" as CultureHandy suggests, since my entire existence is trivial, but they won't be outright jokes. Fair enough?
voodoo_princess
Now that I have heard it from the alligators mouth, so to speak, I do feel better.
Thanks much alligator.....
freckleface2727
I am sick of people playing the race card.
I'm white and not apologetic for it.
discrimnation exsists in virtually EVERY society on earth, and by no means does one demographic group corner the market on it. I don't feel I "owe" anyone anything due to that.
if that's the case, then let Me trace MY ancestry back and see the low beginnings we had, and how badly treated MY People were and Then you can talk to me about reparation.

yes I HAVE been discrimnated against, very hostilly so when we lived in Panama. the store clerks would follow me right on my heels when I went into their stores, would step right in front of me and harrass me when I stopped to look at something, did all but check my bags when I left to be sure I hadn't stolen something I didn't pay for when I was leaving; I never even left my apartment without checking the threat-con level of the anti-American demonstrations that were still rampant in the city the whole time I lived ( & gave birth) there. we were stopped by the PNP and both threatenend and conned to bribe them for a trumped up traffic violation, knowing that if we did bribe them, they could just as easily turn around and haul us to jail for trying to bribe them; this is a place where people go in but don't always come out.

I love the diversity of the world we live in and love the multiplicty of the nationalities of my friends, and I love that in this country we as AMERICANS still feel connected enough to our ancestors origins to embrace some cultural traditions, but I also don't see skin colors. my child doesn't realise there's any difference bc she's been raised to know There's NOT.
it is confusing to me in our society then, when this is constantly thrown in our faces.

I don't want to 'forgive and forget' where any of us came from, bc that's a history of who we are, but yet, isn't it also time we move on as well?
why can we not recognize and learn to respect one another, for Who We Are As Human Beings and what Good we contribute period.
it's time to stop seperating ourselves with hate and handouts.

and I'm deeply sorry Busties, if I've offended anyone here, or worse, yet, hurt anyone,bc it's not at all my intention. :-(

I am afraid now that with what I've written I'm breaking rules that should not be broken.
tyger
yes, thanks, alligator. i really appreciate that you came here and explained what had been going on

i used to shoplift and steal from my parents, my friends, their parents, stores, people i didn't know. i can't even begin to imagine how much i've taken from people. i probably owe my mom a few hundred dollars.
sybarite
Cheers for that alligator. Clarification is always good.

And I have to confess that I immediately recognised that evil MOR song you quoted, although I couldn't name the 'artist'.
tyger
double post to say (((((freckle))))) personally, i think that as long as this thread stays free of malicious content (like, a secret being 'i hate people who *insert something that was just confessed*' with the intent to hurt someone, or an 'i hate thisbustie and thatbustie' secrets) i, personally hope that we don't need unspoken rules. there aren't rules governing the secrets we end up keeping, so why should there be rules when it comes to confessing?

i'm more nervous when i see a group of natives walking towards me than a group of rough-looking guys of any other race. i try not to take tables with scruffy natives at my restaurant. i make cracks about drunk natives. the fact that i've had awful experiences with some people doesn't mean i should paint their entire race this way, but every time i try and change something else happens to reinforce my prior behaviour. i'm sorry my ancestors sent them to residential schools and brought disease and alchohol, but that doesn't mean i have to be nice to the creepy toothless guys asking me if i'm a virgin
culturehandy
I didn't mean to say that what you were saying wasn't important alligator, but before you explained yourself, it just seemed that you were joking. Not to discount your confessions as not important. No hard feelings. I am glad you explained yourself.
mandolyn
what tyger said about this thread.
freckle, not to worry.

culture-h, i didn't realize this thread was your idea. so kudos to you too!

and g, sincere thanks for stepping up to the plate this time. perhaps, tho, you should also confess to your shit-stirring tendencies?
This is a "lo-fi" version of our main content. To view the full version with more information, formatting and images, please click here.
Invision Power Board © 2001-2014 Invision Power Services, Inc.