I don't know where I'm going in life and it scares me.

I want to change my degree but I can't tell my mum because although she will be supported, deep down I know she will be disappointed because it is not a "traditional" subject.

I'm right behind you zora, how do you cope?

same here, zora. i am completely clueless about my future plans.

i don't know where i'm going in life and i just don't care.
beyond this moment never seems to matter much to me.

i want another baby and i'm getting to the point of doing something foolish to make that happen.

I feel useless now that I am done my degree. I poured all my time and energy into things that were a part of university and now that I am done, well we get into that useless thing.

I use the size of my thesis project as my excuse for still being in school but really I don't want to give up the flexiblity of my life as a student.

I feel guilty for not really wanting to travel. So I lie about it. But I really do mean it when I say I want to move far away in a few years. The idea of "visiting" doesn't appeal to me but the idea of living there does. Is that weird?

1. I know I need to leave my job at some point in the next few years, but I don't have a clue what I want to do next, and I'm terrified of being poor again.

2. I obsess about clothes and decorating as a way to remind myself that I'm not poor anymore. (Not that I'm well off, or anything, but you know what I mean.)

3. I feel like I have nothing to talk about anymore.

I am not a good friend. I cannot handle female closeness, so I run.

I want to be so thin that people worry about me.

there's a boy i love so much he can't be anything more than a friend to me, and i wish i could change it, because he's always going to be the one and the one that i couldn't make work

I don't want to travel either and I feel guilty about it. But my life is practially nomadic, and I like it that way.

I think I am probably too selfish to be in a serious relationship.

I am covered in mayonnaise.

I want to be married with a child and have some man take care of me. Sometimes I worry that I would be willing to be in a loveless marraige just to solve my debt.

I am 26 and I don't know how to swim. My husband wants to teach me and it scares the crap out of me.

considering taking up some old vices/bad habits again because my life is too boring without them.

I am 26 and I don't know how to swim. My husband wants to teach me and it scares the crap out of me.

If he tries to push you into deep water when nobody else is around... he's not teaching you how to swim.

I'm slowly growing more and more machiavellian (in a work context) and it worries me.

i covet my things like they are an important part of what my life is, and i hate how i depend on them being there

i hate consuming alchohol, but am thinking of taking it up again just because i like the taste of beer

i can't bring myself to live like i'm dying

i occasionally double post.

i always seem to attract slutty/super sexually experienced men.
i hate it because it intimidates me.

I care immeasurably about political/social issues but I'm too lazy and bitter to do much about them.

wow, great thread zora! (I'm a long time bustie-I created this second name for an issue in another thread, but I think I'll continue to use it just for this one!)

Stealing part of la sirena's.

I care immeasurably about political/social issues, but I'm not afraid I'm not intelligent, funny, creative or "radical" enough for anyone to pay attention to me.

I need space and time to be alone to a pathological degree, and have done since I was a child.

I also think sometimes I'm too selfish to be in a relationship, and I'm in one.

Secretly wish it were me with the unplanned pregnancy instead of my 22-year-old sister.

Secretly am jealous because I was the one with the plans to be a single mother by choice (about five years down the road, however).

Although I am excited and happy about being an auntie, secretly wish that something exciting and wonderful would happen to me for a change. (I have attended many weddings, and celebrated many pregnancies and births in the last few years, and feel like all I do is give my support, show my excitement, and provide presents).

I love being seen as a sex object by men I find sexually attractive. It is a form of power for me.

Bleh, this is why i shouldn't post first thing in the morning. I am afraid i'm not clever, funny etc enough, not I'm not afraid.

I'm tired of members of my family having children without thinking

Next time I get a birth announcement I'm sending a sympathy card

Actually, La Sirena, this threas was all culturehady's idea. Props go to her!

I feel like everything I do is meaningless.

I feel like I want a child, just so I have a project I really care about.

I feel like I am trying to sabotage my career.

I think almost all the drivers in this city can't drive for shit. I also think many of them are yokels.

The client I have standing in front of me right now is a fucking moron, and he thinks I am e-mailing his worker at this moment, when I am really doing this.

I look up people I know on our system.

ETA: Thanks zora! *blushes*

I want to warn any potential girlfriends off from dating my brother, because I secretly suspect he is emotionally abusive in intimate relationships.

I am simultaneously worried and thrilled about the fact that I'm becoming a mean old bitch as I age.

If I were independently wealthy, I would stay exactly where I am now - but I would quit my job and make art all day long.

I pee in the shower.

I have a huge crush on a coworker and I can't act on it out of fear of rejection and and because I'm still involved with AZ Guy.

Half the time I wonder if I should get either a MBA or go to tech school to learn something practical and that can get me more money than what I want to get my master's in, so I won't have to spend my entire life wondering how I'm going to make ends meet.

Actually, I'm not even sure I can go to grad school because of my undergrad GPA and because I didn't take myself seriously enough to pass some of my classes.

And, if I had to do it all over again, I would have transferred to a different school after my freshman or sophomore year, one where I would have fit in better.

I hide pop from the Mr. and tell him we don't have any just so I can have it all.

I hide pop from the Mr. and tell him we don't have any just so I can have it all.

oops.....

I sometimes wish my friend would break up with his girlfriend just because I don't like her. And because every now and again I want him for myself.

I want to tell my mother that sometimes being a parent is a spectator sport. Especially when it comes to my visits to the shrink. It is not all about her and her divorce.

I eat ice-cream out the tub with a teaspoon to make it seem like I'm eating more. And then I eat half a tub.

I want someone else to do the washing up for once, even though I know I'll end up doing it again.

I sometimes busy out the phones at work so I can have five minutes to myself.

I wonder what my coworkers are like in bed.

sometimes i just want to drop out of school, quit my job, take my mom's car and drive to tofino and learn how to surf.

i don't want a boyfriend, i just want someone to fall asleep with at night and snuggle and hold hands with with no other expectations.

my version of a diet is treating coffee as food

Most depressing thread ever.



After I was fired/evicted (I had a job where I got free boarding in exchange for work), I stole money from a business in the same building and changed the cash register form so it wouldn't be immediately obvious. I knew the guy who was working the night I stole the money and who would have been blamed. I used to have a crush on him in high school. I hope nothing bad happened. I also stole a lot of other stuff from that business over a period of several months. I guess I didn't have a conscious at the time but years later I feel extremely bad about all of it.


Oh man, I have so many other and bigger skeletons in my closet, I don't know where to begin...

I use my breasts to get other people's attention.

(yes, I know it's also a quote from Friends, but that doesn't mean it's not true!)

I'm upset that I stopped running last Fall but I can't seem to make myself start again.

I'm scared I'm not going to be happy again.

I smile politely and say hello to coworkers I hate

I pee in the shower too

I want to call my ex-roommate's parents up at their store and tell them that their daughter is a cocaine addict with a controlling addict boyfriend

I secretly hope my male best friend dumps his girlfriend someday, and I call her "potato girl" behind her back

I also use my breasts to get others attention.

I like to be degreaded during sex

I have stolen money from an ex employer as well, but they were such assholes I don't feel bad about it.

I donate my boyfriends clothes, without telling him, if I don't like them. (Just to prevent him from being a CoF- I can't tell you how many of those truck stop t-shirts I've gotten rid of, the ones with the cheesy pictures of eagles and Native Americans...he usually has much better taste- I don't get why he has them!)

I can't stand one of his best friends and I'm holding out on telling him why until I can really use it as a bargaining chip (I really don't want this guy in my wedding party someday!) I also can't stand the best friend's wife and whenever I hear how miserable she is being pregnant, I take a great deal of joy in it. ETA: Just checked her blog- she's at 16 weeks and still pukin'- ha ha!

I ditto peeing in the shower.

When I was 24, I sold my grandfather's fiddle to pay for some dental work, because I was experiencing sheer agony. My father had just paid to have the fiddle restored so he could give it to me, but I didn't think I could ask him to help pay the dentist, because he'd just helped pay my rent that month. I cried and cried and cried until I wanted to die. And then I told my dad I lost it in a move. My dad has been dead for 6 years; I never told him the truth. I'm 37, and I still feel like the biggest shitheel ever.

I have never told anyone, until now.

I spent $28 my friend collected from people in her dorm for me to donate to the AIDSWalk I was doing. I couldn't make it to the walk so the money was just sitting there. Not like I bought bread to feed my starving children or anything either. Someday I will donate at least $28 to an AIDS charity.