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Full Version: Ack! The what do I want to do with my life thread! Finding your passions for career and otherwise.
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sybarite
It's true that a *lot* of people end up working at things that are unrelated to their degree. As mornington says, art history prepares you well for working in an art gallery or as a freelance curator (which can be an excellent job once you're established). Or you could work as an arts administrator (although you'd probably need to do a diploma in arts admin, usually about a year--or just build up admin experience).

It took me until age 30 to decide what the hell I wanted to do. In the end I've combined several areas of experience, all to do with writing but across different areas. Some courses at uni left me cold but some really inspired me and even finding that out was incredibly useful.

Mornington, you're not talking out of your arse. smile.gif
gumby_cc
Art history can lead you all over the place...my boyfriend was an undergrad art history, and then he got a masters in fine art, and now he works at a nonprofit with the long term goal of becoming a college prof....and since there's no such thing as a PhD in studio art, he has all the education he needs to do that. Go him.

With an art history major you could also go into government....I worked with the public art commission in my city and that was really exciting, although the pay was shit. And there are a bunch of colleges around here (I'm in boston) and there were SO many jobs there that I applied to but wasn't qualified for there, in the university libraries and in their art departments....more of it was from the research-y standpoint.

Yeah, when I first started college I would always wonder why an art history major was even created because it seemed so weird, but now it makes sense to me. I think you can do more with it than a museum studies masters...
mirabella
Has anyone had any experience with journalism? I am currently going to school for Education, to be a teacher. And it's odd, because everyone is kind of acting like that is my only option. (Being a single mom, they keep saying the schedule will be perfect.) But I really love every aspect of journalism and am thinking about attempting to switch to Mass Communications. Or could I actually double-major? Is that ridiculously hard?
mirabella
I have decided to get involved with the newspaper at my college (actually I may become co-editor). That will give me a chance to see if I really do enjoy journalism. It's odd how this opportunity presented itself to me yesterday too, almost like it is meant to be. Now I am so excited and planning all of these articles I am going to write.
mornington
yay mirabella! that sounds like a really good idea, actually.
sybarite
Mirabella, as I understand it, experience trumps training in journalism, although increasingly training is also becoming a requirement (depending where you are. It is already required in the US.) Journalism schools also provide opportunities to intern in newspapers (or sometimes radio stations). Good luck; working on a paper is an excellent start.
flanker_ji
The junior jollege in my city has a career center, where I was able to meet with a counselor who directed me to appropriate career and personality assesments - you then get printed results and you can meet with the counselor again to figure out what will really suit who you are and what you love.

Maybe you all have something like this at your community college?

So glad I found this thread - it's nice to hear other people negotiating these difficult choices...
funnybird
(((punkerplus)))
I remember having severe 'what the hell am I doing?' wobbles at the end of the first year of my undergrad degree; I was studying fine art & art history, and I spent the entire summer vacation talking about how I wanted to be a marine biologist. I didn't have (and still don't have) a clue what that would really involve (I grew up in the midlands - totally landlocked). I pictured swimming with dolphins - it's more likely I would have ended up staring down a microscope at some plankton for the rest of my life. Anyway, my point is that I don't think you're being flakey; just normal.

Is there any way you can defer the place you already have for a year? That would give you some breathing space to have a think without losing your 'safety net', so to speak.

Also, the good thing about humanities degrees is that they're not vocational. There are many jobs out there that require a degree simply to show that you're capable of critical and creative thinking, and a good humanities degree from a good university does that just fine.
emtee
I love reading this thread- it makes me feel less alone.

So, I finished my degree, landed a fantastic job doing what I had only dreamed about doing in about 5 years. I found a great suite in a funky neighbourhood, and am spending weekends at Ikea. Here I am, living the post-university dream life, and yet, I still feel like I'm in crisis mode.

I have two groups of friends: friends that finished school 5 years ago and are well into the career-and-family phase of their lives, and friends that are still at university. I feel like no one understands me when I complain about how stressed I am ("But you've got your dream job!" or "What do you mean, stressed?! You're done school!") and how much of an emotional change this is.

I guess I just needed to vent- thanks for the space!
humanist77
Vent all ya like, emtee smile.gif

I guess I need to vent too. I sort of had an epiphany recently, which is that I need to work with and help animals. Any well-paying careers with animals would require me to get at least a bachelor's degree. Pet massage would be ideal, but doesn't really go beyond a certain yuppie demographic.

Is there something higher than a vet tech, but not a veterinarian? Like a veterinary nurse? Anyone know of other good careers with animals? I know that you don't have to pick a major or career path right away in college, so I'll have time to explore as I learn..

But anyway, the idea of going to college and getting back into general ed is refreshing, but a little daunting, and I will have to entirely rely on loans/grants/scholarships, whoever will give me money really. My parents nor I can afford it, but I feel like it's something I have to do.

I'm just not enjoying massage. I'm a people-person who hates people. I don't *hate* people, really. I am fascinated by them-I enjoy socializing and like lot of different people, but I just can't work so intimately with them. But I will always love animals.
humanist77
Bleh..did some research on veterinary techs. The average beginning wage for veterinary techs in the US is MINIMUM WAGE. Not that there is anything *wrong* with earning minimum wage in general, but vet techs are doing more than cleaning up poop-they take blood tests, collect other samples, clean/dress wounds, take medical history, administer shots/vaccines, anesthetisia...average advanced wage goes only up to $10-$15/hour. They perform tasks that require actual academic knowledge and skill.

Is there anything wrong with genuinely wanting to help and work with animals, but also desiring a decent salary? I mean it's totally noble to do low-paying work to help people and animals, but..to put it simply, I don't handle stress well. I know that being financially stable doesn't mean you will be stress-free, but the security of it certainly helps. If I go back to school I assume I will have student loans to pay off as well.

I have a 'habit' sometimes of shooting for the stars. That habit is getting excited about the notion of attempting to go to veterinary school, but my sensible self is insisting that would be crazy.

It would require strenuous science/biology/chemistry/math/anatomy education, and that's just in an undergrad degree. I never did particularly well in those areas in high school, but I never cared enough in high school to do well. I always do well if I care enough though.

My sensible self is very prepared to let the idea of this go after I do more research. But my shooting-for-stars self is reminding me that it's better to regret things you have done, than things you haven't. I don't know if I have it in me, but I want to try. I mean it wouldn't hurt to start a bachelor's degree, taking classes in these areas and do the best I can, then decide if I can go further with it.

Is it possible to talk to a career counselor at colleges without being enrolled in the school?

Thanks for reading my vent!
sassygrrl

Okay, I'm in a crap job. But, I found out recently that we are somehow connected to the IT field. And, that my job will pay awesome bonuses for IT certification. The question is, what certifications do I get? I used to be in the IT field way back when the dot com bubble was first getting going, but have no idea where to start.

Interesting my moron of a supervisor had no idea that this was being offered until I brought it to her attention.

Any advice?
flanker_ji
Humanist, at the Junior College in my city, you don't have to be enrolled in school to utilize their Career Center. You can make an appointment with a counselor, and they have you take certain tests to gauge where your intrests and strengths lie (there's a fee to take these tests), then you go back to the counselor and discuss the results.

Sassy, I used to be in an IT program - the first certification test I prepared for was the A+ certification, which covered computer hardware and operations, and basic network functions. You can also get certifications in networking, Windows Server, Linux, Cisco, etc.

The college I went to was a local one, but as far as I know, they have these programs at Heald, DeVry, and other vocational schools. You might also want to look for online certificate programs (like University of Phoenix). Hope this helps.
sassygrrl
QUOTE(flanker_ji @ Aug 14 2006, 08:30 AM) *

Humanist, at the Junior College in my city, you don't have to be enrolled in school to utilize their Career Center. You can make an appointment with a counselor, and they have you take certain tests to gauge where your intrests and strengths lie (there's a fee to take these tests), then you go back to the counselor and discuss the results.

Sassy, I used to be in an IT program - the first certification test I prepared for was the A+ certification, which covered computer hardware and operations, and basic network functions. You can also get certifications in networking, Windows Server, Linux, Cisco, etc.

The college I went to was a local one, but as far as I know, they have these programs at Heald, DeVry, and other vocational schools. You might also want to look for online certificate programs (like University of Phoenix). Hope this helps.



Thanks Flanker, I'll look into it. I'm still not sure what I want. I basically have to pay for the classes/training on my own, and they're reimburse me with a bonus. So, just gotta figure out what and where to take it. There's a few locations of Devry here.
humanist77
thanks, flanker!

I enrolled in the community college. I'll be starting next spring.
Now, I have to hunt down as many scholarships and grants/loans as I can!
sassygrrl
Trying to do as much research about IT certification as I can. I don't neccesary want to go back to school, but I know I'll have to pay an arm and leg to get one. I just have to do more research in the field, b/c I have NO idea what I want to get into. But, I'm going to try to start in either the winter or the spring. That is, if I'm still at this crap job.

Yay humanist! smile.gif
flanker_ji
You're welcome!

Double yay humanist!
roseviolet
Humanist, have you ever worked for a vet's office before? Have you spoken to a veterinarian about your interest in the profession? I suggest you check it out. I know from experience that vets are often very happy to talk to people who are considering entering the profession. If you have a vet for your pets, just give him or her a call. It'll be far more informative than a meeting with a career counselor.
humanist77
That's a good idea, rose-it occured to me that the best information would come from veterinarians, but it didn't occur to me to actually go into a vet's office to find them tongue.gif

People keep feeling the need to remind me about the euthanasia issue. I know they are just trying to show concern, but it's not like I haven't thought about it already, and for some reason it annoys me that everyone reminds me about it. The only thing about euthanizing that really does bother me at this point is the fact that a lot of vets have to put perfectly healthy animals down just because they are homeless, and the office can't keep them for that long, and they would probably eventually be euthanized in a shelter anyway. I know one thing is for sure-that if I make it all the way, pet sterilizing will be a VERY important cause to me.

Thanks, rose!
erinjane
Kinda off topic, but,
I used to be fairly against euthanizing animals but I saw a documentary on CBC a couple of years ago that had a kill shelter and it really opens your eyes to how it can be necessary sometimes. The fact is animals aren't human and sometimes they can't be controlled or cured. It's sad that perfectly healthy animals that can't find homes have to be killed. But the footage they showed of no-kill shelters was so horrible. The conditions the animals live in are horrible and a lot of them end up with a life in a small cage never finding another home. And some really dangerous animals get given out and can really injure people.

/off topic.
roseviolet
You're very welcome, Humanist! Once upon a time I was considering becoming a vet. I was still in high school when my mom mentioned my interest to our vet & he said I was perfectly welcome to come in & talk to him and even spend some time around the office just to see what it's like. I wasn't able to take him up on his offer, but a few years later I got a job at a vet office.

Now, I gotta confess. It was hard. Very emotionally draining. I was there for less than 6 months & then I quit because it was just too difficult. So many sick and dying animals, compounded by owners who wouldn't/couldn't pay the vet bills. I just couldn't take it. I don't want to discourage you, though. It wasn't the right place for me to be, but you might find your purpose helping animals. No one can save every pet that comes through the clinic's doors, but you can certainly help a lot of them. And I'm sure that feels very rewarding!
kcrile
Off the topic of vets... Just wanted to say how happy I am to have found this thread. I know its been said before, but it really is great to know that other people are going through the same questions and doubts.
I am changing careers after spending 4 yrs in the TV/film production industry and I'm trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I think I want to go into social work, but want to do a little more research and talk to more people to see if that is really what I want to do. We shall see....
kcrile
Sorry I'm new and being a total worry wart so I felt the need to post again to apologize about my last post which made it sound like I was being totally dismissive of the conversation that was going on about vets and I am so sorry for how rude I sounded. I guess I was just so excited to jump in and start talking that I kind of disregarded the flow of communication.

That being said... I also thought about being a vet but got scared away, because I am a math/science wimp and not sure I would be able to handle the emotional aspect of veterinary medecine. SO I give big props to those who are vets and vet techs.
kcrile
It seems really quiet around the forums today. Not sure if people are taking off early for labor day. Maybe it is just the threads that I visit.

ANyway I am having a little anxiety because I have a history of getting excited about something but not following through. And I'm worried that is happening with my nascent desire to be a social worker. Its not that I don't want to do that anymore it is just that I am being unfocused and not doing things that might help get me into that arena. It drives my fiancee nuts that I get excited about a career, or project and I buy books and supplies and a 8/10 nothing comes of it. I like to think of it as exploration, but to be honest with myself and with everyone else I have to confess that it is a weird breed of ADD and fear of failure.

I wish I could just figure out how keep myself focused. I'm pretty sure that this is a problem I have to deal with on my own so I thank you all for being my sounding board. But if you have any thoughts/suggestions I would appreciate any thoughts people have.
hummingbird
kcrile, that's the exact same problem that I have. I get really excited about things and then once the novelty has worn out, I don't have the stamina for it, or I lose interest, or I start having all these other issues that, oh so convieniently, pop up!

So, that's why I am confused...how is it that some people have this unrelenting passion that sticks through the good and bad times.

Sometimes I feel like I am wishy washy, but I know that this is one my lifes greatest challenges, and I know why I have this problem. I have several theories. One is that I was a forcepts baby, and it's been said that people who had to be helped out of the womb instead of naturally coming out have problems committing...I dunno. Another issue is that I was a latch-key kid, I was never really involved in anything growing up, so now, as a reformed adult that actually wants to contribute something to life and be recognized for it by my peers, my freaking lap is empty. unsure.gif Very very unsure what moves to make in this life. Don't want my life to pass by without finding these things that renew me and fill me with a sense of joy, and purpose.

Hang in there kcrile! Go for the social work thing. If you decide that it's not what you want, you can always change your mind, but at least give it a shot. Sociology and politics are two major things that I am into, as well as art. You know, I'd love to be doing something like Eve Ensler, politics + art = phenomenal shit. I just don't know how I'm ever going to get there.
lucizoe
This is such a sweet thread...and I mean that in all connotations of the word...

kcrile, welcome to BUST!!! It is the number one most supportive and caring and funniest community on the entire internets...humanist, do you talk to mornington at all? she's a vet student...

I just started a conservatory program in theatre design/technology (costume) and the faculty seem to take a perverse and sadistic pleasure in scaring the crap out of the newbies. Granted, I am 24 years old and all my classmates are 18, so I'm taking most of it as a "must terrify the children so that they don't fuck around and waste our time" attitude, but I still see it as really counterproductive. People come to this program because it's a professional training program; if at 18 I knew I wanted to do this with my life I would have really resented being treated this way, and I sure as shit am not fond of it now.

The chair of the program has a major case of short-man syndrome and has threatened us twice with literally kicking us out should we come to class chemically-altered. What the hell? On the one hand, they are all demanding that kids just out of high school behave as adults (which they should, I agree), then turn around and assume that these young adults won't know it's a bad idea to come to scene shop drunk? Whatever, dude.

So I'm stuck on how to approach the chair, to whom I need to introduce myself and build a relationship with, as he is one of the job gatekeepers. He is also, according both to reputation and explicit information from one of the professors, a hard-ass who enjoys intimidating people, although he will respect you if you don't let him know he intimidates you. Like a bear, or whatever.

I need to find out if I can waive some production credits; I've been designing and building costumes for two years (sewing for almost 20) and have several solo design credits to my name (not professional, but I was paid!). I honestly do not need to take costume construction I and II, which would cut a bit of time off my stay here, but given this man's reputation, I don't want to be seen as the student who wants special treatment...although I do think I'm entitled to it in this case.

Blah. I'm pissed. This is my third college; I keep dropping out because I don't know what I want to do. I always come back to theatre, and I'm good at costuming. I need drawing classes, but I can't fit them in because I am required to take basics in things I have no interest in doing (electrics and scene schop and set painting). Meanwhile, my design professor just told us to build scale models for such-and-such, and to do this-and-that without any information as to how to actually DO it. I'm confused. Is this really what I want to do if it means taking four years of disrespect and what seems to be a "let's tear them down and build them back up" sort of mentality? Like theatre boot camp, this.

Again, blah. Sorry. This is more of a rant, but I didn't know where else to put it, and I've been feeling so conflicted about this lately. I definitely do not have the necessary skills to bypass actual training and just work in the industry, but I don't know if I want to be almost 30 before I break in. I was all excited about this program, but the past week has just deflated me entirely.
flanker_ji
Anywhoo...
tatiana
Hey, lucizoe, I know what you mean. I just went back to college as a mature student and the attitude of some of the instructors towards the students is atrocious. I want to remind them that this isn't high school and I'm paying them. I don't need the condescension and the pats on the head and the 'oh-when-you-find-yourself' you'll appreciate this, that, and the other thing. Blech. Just teach me and stick to mothering your kids not your students.

Sorry, the prospect of going back on Wednesday is just bringing this back. I've had some instructors who were mature students themselves who are great towards everyone, but they aren't the majority.
raisingirl
Hey guys. I've poked my head in here from time to time. Don't ever tell yourself you're "too old" to do something; no matter what you do, you're going to be whatever age it is you think is "too old" to do that one thing, so why not plunge in and do it?
kcrile
(((hummingbird))) Yea for not being alone!!! I have way too many interests and am insanely jealous of people who seem to have a driving passion that propels them into what they want to do in life. Even if it isn't necessarily a driving passion, it seems like most people can at least pick a career and stick with it.

I try to remind myself that if I don't like social work I can always change careers, but I want to at least get to a point where I've spent enough time in the field to actually know if I want to stick with it. As opposed to just dropping it as usual.

I'm also kind of worried about going back to school to get a Master's... Big commitment! But probably necessary if I want to be in social work. Blah, lots of things to think about/deal with.

But I've got to say that this thread is so awesome because it keeps me in line. Everytime I read the posts it inspires me to go work on my applications or check out some info on the web. Gotta love Bust!!!
ion
Hey! I'm new to Bust and this looks like the place I belong in. For five years, while I was doing my BA I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I thought that I had become one of those people with a driving passion kcrile.

I wanted to be a librarian. That was all well and good the first couple of years, but by the time I graduated there didn't seem to be any jobs. I've known a bunch of people who finished their MLS, and then ended up getting part time jobs, or marketting jobs.

So I'm trying to figure out what will be the next thing to do.

I'm looking at possibly Urban Planning, but I'm not sure when to make the big leap into school again. Not sure why it seems like a big deal, other than that the paper work seems insurmountable after getting home from pushing other people's paper work all day.


Raisingirl, what was it that you decided to do?
roseviolet
Luci, how are things going at the costume conservatory? I'm sorry to hear they're being so hard on everyone, but you know they're being like this to scare off all of the fragile people, right? Working in theatre is sooooo damn hard. The competition is enormous! And the deadlines for a costumer ... well, I don't need to tell you about those late late nights in the costume shop! You need to be dedicated and determined to survive in this business. But a lot of people who are new to the program don't know as well as you do what they're in for. Plus, a lot of 18-year-olds who are finally out of mommy and daddy's house for the first time will do stupid stuff like showing up to work stoned or drunk. I've seen it plenty of times myself and I'm sure the people who run the conservatory have seen it too many times or they wouldn't be giving such a warning.

Just take a deeeeeeep breath. Realize that they don't know you that well yet, but with each passing day they are seeing how capeable and professional you are. It takes time for cream to rise to the top, but you are rising bit by bit each and every minute, Luci. Just hold on.

From one costumer to another, may I ask what they test on in those two construction classes? I mean, is it as simple as how to thread a serger and use an industrial iron or what?
lucizoe
Hey rosie! *waves maniacally*

darned if I know what I need to do to demonstrate competence...you know how theatre groups get really close-knit and incestuous and all that? Same thing in this program - it's really disappointing that that has to carry over to professors and upperclasspersons and whatnot, but no one will give anyone any information, with the mindset that everyone must suffer just as much as they did and god forbid anyone be helpful. There is a level of hostility and unprofessionalism that I find so off-putting.

blah. ranty and incoherent. let me try that again.

I don't know what they need me to do in order to test out, because getting any information at all from this organization is as simple as holding a coherent conversation with a squirrel. The chair is seemingly permanently unavailable, unless he has specifically scheduled a chewing-out. You do not want to find your name on a list posted on his door.

It's so annoying and if I was anyone else, especially the timid 18 year old I was, I would have dropped out already. There are all these hidden requirements, such as working theatre jobs every summer, of which no one has informed us. I don't need anyone to hold my hand; I just need the pertinent information, which they won't give without a fight. As I said, it's remarkably unprofessional for a program that demands professional behavior right from the start.

Hanging in there.

Another ranty mcrant - I was in my studio yesterday, eating my lunch and finishing a set design and a sophomore wandered in, started hanging over my shoulder and asking me what I was doing, and not in a friendly, idly curious way, either. More like a challenge, like she was entitled to come and bother us. The question should have been what SHE thought she was doing coming into the freshman studio. Must.get.more.assertive.
knorl05
lucizoe: if you stick with it, you'll still be learning and figuring out more about yourself and your passion. if you stick with it and find out you dont want to do it, you'll be closer to figuring out what you do. i guess i'd say dont really look at 30 as though it's an awful late time to start your life, because your life has already started. life is a process, you're developing today just like you're still going to be developing at 40. it helps to experiment so you can refine your vision and see what remains true in your soul. as hard as it is, dont let silly people keep you from your goals. they are just details. maybe you're using the resistence you're being faced with as an excuse because you really dont want to get into that? just something to consider..
neverending
I was a Phlebotomist/Lab tech for 4 1/2yrs. and I loved the job but I hated all the bullcrap associated with it (backbiting,Gossip, Physicians&RN'S that think they are God,etc).I am now in Nursing school and I feel I have made the wrong choice.Don't get me wrong!I am a people person but I really don't want the stress and responsibility that comes along with Nursing.There are millions of jobs out there and I wanted to know why you all love or hate your jobs so maybe it could help me make a decision as to what I want to do with my life. I am currently thinking about Radiology, Surgical Technology, and Dental Hygiene.Any thoughts?
freckleface2727
hey y'all,

just wanted to stop in & let anyone who is looking for temp work know that the US Census is hiring right now, or at least they are here in nc.
I saw a poster at the library w/ the # on it for the local office, and there is a website as well but I can't get it to pull up. just do a seach for Census and you'll find it.
the poster said it pays $11.50 an hour, + milage I think.
step #1 is a general skills test, and after that I'm not sure.
I'm going monday at noon to probably not qualify but it's worth the shot all the same.
they were also looking for Management/Supervisors too.

neverending-
how long was your plebotomy course? I have 2 friends that are looking at going throu the local city Tech school but neither has actually called to find out yet.
my brother took it thru the Red Cross and they paid for his training and then he worked for them for a time as repayment.
I'm sorry you had to deal w/ so much crap, but good for you for going even farther in nursing.
I have another friend who is Med Assistant and loves it.
I always thought Sonography would be really cool, but I'm terrible w/ math.

chickenlittle
Hey all,
It's been ages since I've been here, and I apologize for just jumping in and purging- I'm at the freakout point. I have been having some real job/identity crises lately and it's been affecting [negatively] the rest of my life (relationship, family, sense of self).

I used to introduce myself as a theatre director who had a day job to pay the bills. I've gotten way off track in the last two-ish years ('coincidentally' the same time frame i've been in my current relationship- I've done the disappearing woman thing, which I always swore would never happen) and now, even though I'm paying my bills by doing theater (sort of- I work in a graduate theater department at a university as the one who runs the program, essentially), I am really unhappy.

I'm here to help people, to create change in the world, to be excited about life, to follow artistic endeavors! and somehow I've gotten caught up in this jobworld where it's important to have a steady paycheck, health insurance, security. I know those things can be helpful- but not at the expense of my soul. and that's what I feel is happening (has happened) now.

So I've started to take back my life creatively- I'm taking bass lessons and started writing again. I've been meditating and doing a little yoga here and there. I'm looking into massage therapy school (something I've always been drawn to but scared of, honestly) and that's why I came in here, actually: I remembered in the old lounge there was a massage therapist thread. I was coming to see if any massage therapists would talk to me about their careers, their paths, etc- but I found this thread! and it seemed like serendipity.

Thanks for letting me vent!
free_spirit
(just posting here because there is no general work questions thread)

how many miles is considered to be too many to travel for work? (for a full time position)

Thanks

(ETA: I just did a search for the average amount of miles usually traveled to go to work was 11.6 miles, do most of you work within 12 miles of where you live?)
chickenlittle
Hey free_spirit-
I would say that it depends on what your tolerance for commuting is, the way you would travel to work, what the commute would be like...right now I have a ten-minute walk through a park to get to my job, and I love it. I have spent up to an hour and a half on public transportation and HATED it (in fact, it was one of the reasons I quit that job- I couldn't bear the commute every morning and evening). Good luck!
chickenlittle
No WAY, blanche! 'should be'?!

That is CRAZINESS. 3hours of travel to and from work? Puh-leeze.
pympmama1
I have a question to ask my fellow working women. Is it important to any of you that you have a social life. I work the 3rd shift at a computer firm creating online course content for univerisities. I have been doing 3rd shift for about 5yrs now. My days off are spent in school trying to get certified in networking. I have lost the concept of a social life. I socialize at a local cafe everyday. I was never a club person and I don't drink due to my diabeties. People have been looking at me strangely b/c I don't do what every one else is doing.....Clubbing,drinking, and partying. How do you define a social life ? and without a social life can it be considered as.... life wasted.... some individuals tend to lean toward the idea that if u are not clubbing and drinking u are not living and it wears on me so i figured i would get other women's opinons. I make decent money and I travel when I want to... but am I missing out on the world around me b/c i work so much
persimmon_grrrl
pympmama: i hear you on people being judgmental about not being into the club/bar scene. i think you ultimately define whether or not you are having fun, and maybe you want to meet more people? i know i don't smoke and don't like bars and most clubs for that reason, and i also have asthma. i'm trying to find creative ways to find new people, and am doing okay so far, finding nonsmoking activities, discussion nights, movie groups, etc. if you have any more ideas, let me know!

and not to digress, but i couldn't find the "job hunting" thread, so i hope this thread is apropos.

a question about jobs:

i have been jobhunting like uninsured on recent college grad. several interviews, some of them lasting an hour, and going very well, later, i don't have "a job" yet. it is frustrating. is it normal for interviewers to give a 2-week time frame, or even till november? (three weeks, at least from the time i interviewed)

i feel so frustrated, and feeling a bit impatient with the process, but i really need a job. i lost my potential new apartment to not being employed (since early october). i am applying and applying, and have gotten phone calls and interviews, so i feel good about that. also, i did various methods of job hunting, and found cool orgs i wanted to work with in my area and sent them impromptu cover letters and resumes, and i actually got a phone call yesterday about wanting an interview next week! so i feel really good about that. but it did take a good two weeks for them to "bite".

i guess i'd just like to hear about other people's experiences with job hunting, and about the general waiting times people experienced. from what i can tell, the employers are in the interview process, so i guess it makes sense that they need to discuss, even do a second round of interviews, before deciding. maybe i answered my own question...

thanks for any input!
knorl05
pympmama1: there's a quote i like, but i dont remember who said it "we should work to live, not live to work"

..and.. a social life is just that.. being social. just because you're not into the typical BS, and you have your own mind, doesnt mean you cant be social. figure out what interests you. volunteer work is great because you get to meet great people, and spend time doing something worthwhile. or there are coffee houses.. libraries/book stores.. plays.. museums.. art shows/galleries.. organizations.. SO much more out there than clubs i think it's a damn shame people see that as their own outlet to socialize.
katiebelle2882
chicken little,


i dont know where you are from, but if you live on long island in nyc (just one place in this country) and are one of the thousands if not millions taking the commuter train every day from there, you easily have a 3 hour commute when its all put together. i know i do. 3 hours one way is ridiculous, but total, not so much. ill be the first to admit it sucks, but its far from being compeltely out of this world or uncalled for.

i agree with knorl about the socialization thing. i for one like bars (clubs not so much) and have met some people that have turned out as extraordinary friends from a regular bar. however, it should not be anyones sole form of socialization. i also find smaller bars that dont get too crowded as great ways to socialize, whether you drink or not.

there are a ton of other things as well that you can do. i will say however that by not having any social life whatsoever (regardless of where you get that sociallizing from) is doing yourself a disservice. mostly bc i think most need human interaction and fun as a part of a happy existence. but, if your choice of socializing is not bars and clubs, then no you arent missing out on life just cause you arent out partying. everyone has a different idea of what "life" is. all of knorl's places of finding people to hang with are great ideas that can be super beneficial and fun too.

persimmongirl,

that actually is a relatively normal amount of time to have a company give you. at least in my experience. i would suggest a headhunter or something. also, never underestimate the power of networking-whether its through alumni from your college or through people you know. ask your parents and friends if they have friends in sectors you are interested in getting into. that way, not only can you get an interview easier much of the time, but they will be more likely to hire you as opposed to other candidates bc they have references that say you are great:)
erinjane
It's interesting the difference in what people consider a reasonable commute. Of course city size makes all the difference.

I guess my city is really relatively small compared to others (we don't even have a freeway), but I commute 25 minutes by car to one of my jobs, or 45 minutes by bus and I find that to be my limit. If I had to go any further I wouldn't have taken the job.

My other job is at my university which is a 20 minute bus ride, or a 5-10 minute car ride, and I love it. I live in a suburb and my university is in the heart of downtown.

I don't think there's any way that people within my city would have anything more than a 1 hour commute even if they were going from one end of the city to another.
maddy29
i leave my house at 8:30, the bus comes whenever it feels like it (usually around 8:45) and i get to work at 9:20ish, as long as there's no traffic. on the way home, it takes longer. if i leave at 5 i get home about 6, and if there's traffic it can take more than an hour.

i used to commute about 1.5 hours each way-i took a bus to the train to a bus, and it sucked! mostly because of the transferring-now i just sit on one bus and i can read and i almost always get a seat. it's actually only a few miles from my house-it takes me about 1.5 hours to walk it-it's just that the bus doesn't go the directest route, plus traffic which can get pretty wild in boston...

i'm sooo jealous of people who can walk to work-that's my dream....

in terms of how long it takes to get called after an interview, i swear it's always soooo long seeming! sometimes they choose someone else at first, and are waiting for that person to decide, or negotiating salary with someone else.....
raisingirl
After the best interview of my life so far (also the most stressful interview, too), one of the interviewers asked me as she escorted me to the elevators, "So where do we stand on your list?" THEY asked ME where they stand! I was floored and had never been asked that before, but tried not to let it show. They really wanted me there and formally offered me the job in writing just days later. I was a total sucker not to take the job and I still have regrets about it now, even a year later. Thank goodness the door is still sort of open with them.

Dream big and be prepared for anything. wink.gif
go_kayte
Ughhhh I am freaking OUT about what I'm going to do with myself.

If I pass all my classes (kinda looking doubtful this semester...I'm in a slump) I'm graduating in May 07. Otherwise, August or December 07.

This is for a BS in Electrical Engineering.

Which I don't really think is what I want to do with my life. Plus I'm having an exceptionally hard time finding jobs related to the field...everyone wants an engineer "with 10+ years industry experience" or something. I have no idea how you get experience in this field in the first place. I am starting to suspect, however, based on the fact that my male peers are all getting great jobs with benefits regardless of their GPA's that my gender is a big factor in this.

Apparently the electrical engineering industry is terrified of vaginas. Haven't they ever heard of the economic benefits of workforce diversity? Gah.

So, I've been thinking of alternatives. I am very interested in women's health and thought about getting a nursing degree in that field. I'm also very very interested in biomedical engineering, however that field seems to be intensely competitive and I don't think any grad schools will let me in to that major. That's the other thing--I'm not sure any grad schools will let me in whatsoever: my GPA is hovering just below 3.2 and that's most schools' minimum.

What makes this whole thing worse is that I really really want to get out of Michigan because it's freaking cold and horrible. I want to live in a big city (but definitely not detroit...god I hate detroit...) but to do that I am going to need a very well paying job and I'm going to need to be hired before I move.
I'm feeling like I can't survive another winter here.
Seriously, it's cold. I want out. I always thought I could get a great job in electrical engineering at least $50k + benefits, anywhere in the country I'd want to move. Maybe it was like that a few years ago, but I can't find those jobs now.

Hooray for this thread for letting me get this out.
pollystyrene
I'm currently unemployed and sort of floundering around, looking for a job. I have experience in customer service and accounts receivable, but I sort of fell into those positions and they weren't really what I wanted.

I have some college education. I never finished. I struggled with depression while I was in school, got kicked out, moved back home, took some more classes at community college, but even with therapy and medication, school just made my depression worse and I couldn't take it. I haven't taken any classes in nearly 4 years. I don't really have any interest in going back to school. I don't know what I want to do.

My old therapist said I should go into a mental health profession because I have compassion and understanding for people with mental illness- I found this out the hard way when one of my sister's ex's had a mental break in front of me and I managed to keep my wits about me, and make sure both of us were safe. It's definitely something I'm interested in, but like I said, no interest in going back to school, at least not enough to get the few credit hours I still need to get an associates degree.

I thought about going into some sort of medical administration job, and most of them required classes in things like medical terminology or medical billing. I'd be okay with a class or two, but that's about it.

One other area I'd be interested in is becoming a 911 operator. I can't find any information on how you become one, though. There's books on Amazon to prepare you for the certification test, but I'd assume you have to get training somewhere before you take the test. It's like impossible to get information on the job field though. Anyone know anything about it?

Right now, my greatest prospect is working the front desk at my cousin's dental practice. I wouldn't mind doing that for a year or two, but since I have no desire to become a dental hygienist, there's really no place to go from there in the office.
clementine509
Hug for pollystyrene. *Squeeze* I hope you find more info on the 911-operator job. I guess you could always take online classes to get more training if you're not OK with actually going to school but in any case I hope it works out for you!

As of today, I'm also one of the (un)happily unemployed. I go into it more on another post here but long story short, I was temping for the last year on and off to get experience in an office. I don't hate working in an office usually but I don't love it either. So I'm sitting here today thinking about my skills and interests and how they could translate to a job I like. I'm a little jaded on that front though -- when I first got out of college two years ago, I hooked up with a company that sold group passes for snowboarding. I was kind of like a salesperson in that I met up with different groups tried to sell them on the company's group packages. Problem was the pay was shit. The biggest perk was that I got a free season pass and access to a lot of equipment that I otherwise would not have. But after struggling with it for the snowboarding season and still having to live with my mom 'cuz my income wasn't enough to pay for rent on my own, I was fed up and left. It was fine because the job was only good around the fall/winter months anyway! So much for that passion turning into a career. I'm still hopeful that I can use some aspect of what I was picking up as a temp to apply it to the boarding industry somehow but it's a hard field to find a decent job.
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