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NoSissy
QUOTE(anarch @ Jun 29 2008, 04:23 PM) *
More on medical vs surgical abortions.


Just wanted to share, that I have had a medical and surgical abortion. I would like to use these experiences to help and support other women in making a very difficult choice. I also think the circumstances and results of my abortions could help others.

My boyfriend of 3 years began as a one night stand that neither of us expected to go anywhere. He fathered 2 boys in 3 MONTHS when he was 17YRS OLD. (Being 17 and dumb, girls he dated said they were on birth control, didn't find out about the first until the second was already pregnant.) At 27 he is an active father to both boys, and has taken responsibility as much as a 17 yr old father could. He had a vasectamy(sp) at 22 but the urologist would only do the "reversible" kind where they pinch it off or tie the tube instead of snipping it. We both believed we were in the clear. Apparently we were not. I had been extraordinairily diligent about birth control for 30 years, all for naught. I thought I would NEVER be in the position to decide whether or not to have an abortion because I ALWAYS protected myself and played it safe. But here I was confronted with what was to me an unfathomable situation. We had strong feelings for each other, but we'd only been together for a month. I wasn't ready, and as much as you can love a child, I've SEEN that when you bring a child into the world without truly, passionately wanting the responsibility of raising a child, the child's self-esteem WILL SUFFER. So I did what i felt was the best for myself, but also what was best for my lover, who was swiftly becoming my partner, and his 2 sons, who already suffer because they were the unexpected children of teenage parents. I chose a medical abortion.

At this point in my life, I do not feel hormonal birth control is an option for me. It was right for me when I was 15 years old until I was 22 years old because it was the time I needed to explore sexually and figure out who I was and what direction I wanted to go in my life. I am ETERNALLY grateful to my mother for being so open and such a non-judgmental resource for me in my sexual education. The rate of teen pregnancy I witness around me now makes me realize that most girls don't have such a valuable resource to consult in their early sexual education, but that's a whole different thread. I was trying out other non-hormonal birth control options including condoms, a diaphragm with spermicide, withdrawl and timing my cycle, when I got pregnant AGAIN. Apparently my partner has some seriously potent sperm. I thought we might be ready for a child at that point, but my fear and my instincts told me I was not. So I opted for a surgical abortion, because I wanted it to be over as quickly as possible. I now am THRILLED to say that I have a COPPER IUD that will last up to 10 years because being a step-mom to my partner's little boys has made me realize that good parenting is the ultimate sacrifice of individual independence. I'm no longer sure if I even want children of my own. I know about the few controversial issues surrounding the IUD, but I am going with the odds on this one. I will NEVER have another abortion unless the pregnancy would endanger my life. I HIGHLY recommend AVOIDING it in the first place. But when a woman decides that is what she needs to do, NO ONE should try to tell her otherwise. I will help, support, and pass on information regarding both of these procedures to any woman in need.

sierra82
I just found out yesterday that I'm pregnant. It really wasn't supposed to happen. It's not like we were careless; we unintentionally made a mistake. I really didn't feel any indication that I was pregnant, and even after the positive test I was still in denial. The only reason I took a test was because I chart my basal temperature every morning, and knew something was up when I had more than 12 days of high temps. My boyfriend and I have discussed before what we would do in this kind of situation, and after talking about it last night we both decided that the best thing to do is to terminate it.

But that was before the whole thing sunk in today. I'm scheduled to have the surgical termination in a week and I'm feeling super depressed about it. I'm 26, my boyfriend and I have been together for years and do plan on marriage and kids someday. He is someone that I do want to eventually have kids with, and I think that is making this all the harder. It's just not the right time -- I'm trying to finish a doctorate, he's trying to start his own business, neither of us has a permanent income source, we wouldn't even be able to live together for over another year. And we've had concrete plans concerning when we want to have kids... it's a long story but basically we KNOW we can't have a child in the kind of environment that we're in and need to wait until we're in a much more secure situation. And honestly... we're really just not ready to be good parents.

I thought I'd be able to be much more stoic about this. But I can't help but feel horrible. I'm really afraid that by the time next week rolls around, I will feel a connection to "it", because I already kind of do. I've been crying on and off all day and have already found myself hysterically apologizing to it. I'm feeling guilty and selfish even though I keep telling myself that it really is best, that a child cannot be raised properly in my current situation. My brain believes it, but my heart thinks it's a crock of shit.

I'm also really worried that all this will somehow change my relationship with my boyfriend. I'm not sure how, but it worries me. It's like, this is a product of our love, and now it's going to be destroyed. I'm also scared about the surgical procedure itself, worried that something will go wrong causing me to not be able to have a baby in the future. I will have thrown away my chance.


Please, if anyone can sympathize or offer any advice as to how to gather the strength to go through with this, please share.
shinyx3
sierra, i do not believe that the decision to get an abortion or to keep an unwanted pregnancy is ever easy. let me start by saying that i have terminated a pregnancy and i was married and financially stable at the time. there were simply too many reason why having a baby was not the right choice for me at that time. there are so many feeling and emotions with any life choice that will have an effect on the rest of your life and in this case your sig others as well. we all want to do what is best for the situation and sometimes it is not clear to both heart and mind what that is. i wish you luck and love while going through this process as i know it can really suck. there are lots of great stories on this thread of how people have dealt with this. it may be helpful just to read some and see that you are not at all alone. as to this changing your relationship with your boyfriend, it very well may, but perhaps not in the way you are worrying about. it may make you stronger and more close having made this kind of a life choice together and being the responsible adults that you are. this may bring out strength in both of you.

keep up posted on how you are doing and remember that we are often so much stronger than we think we can be.
kittenb
sierra82 - I'm going to repost this number: 1-866-4-EXHALE. Exhale is a pro-choice and pro-woman abortion counseling hotline. Their hours are 5-10 PM, M-F and noon-10PM Sa-Su. Planned Parenthood endorses them. They are a place that you can share your confusion and pain with and they will support your choices.
You also might benefit from looking through some of the rituals that have been created to help women through abortions. Whatever your spiritual beliefts are, the ceremonies can often help bring closure and solace to this time. I did a quick Yahoo search and found some sites. However, due to the sneakiness of the anti-choice movement you might want to have someone screen the sites before you look at them, just to make sure that they are sites that will help not harm.
Above all, be kind to yourself. You deserve it.
vegdumpling
QUOTE(deepthinker @ Apr 24 2008, 12:43 AM) *
I'll warn you now, what I'm going to say may not be very popular here, but I feel the need to say something regarding this topic. I apologize now, in case I come across as rude or mean in this post, as that's certainly not how I intend what I am about to say.

First off, let's look at the actual child itself here. Now I can understand things are rough when pregnant, for various reasons depending on the circumstances surrounding it but....why should the baby be punished for something it had no say over? It's not it's fault it got there, the fact is it's there, and deserves life and love just as much as any other human being does.

Staying on that, think about your own lives for a second. Now imagine you never existed, or you yourself were aborted. It's a scary thought isn't it? I almost was aborted myself, and I could have had an older sibling but it was aborted. I always wonder how my life might have been different had I had that older brother or sister, just where it would be now.

Something else too, is there's the fact that there are so many women out there who actually do want kids but cannot have them for various reasons. These are women who would do anything for a child, and yet many who do have that chance, just throw it away. You ladies have been given one of the greatest gifts imaginable (if not the greatest), in the ability to bring new life into the world, why not embrace it?

Lastly, where does the dad or for that matter other family members fit into all this, like grandparents, aunts and uncles. It's not just your kid of course, do their feelings or thoughts mean nothing?

Just some things to chew on.....

you know, deep thinker, i actually have thought on these things. in fact i owe my life to an abortion, my mother had an abortion and if she had not she would have been unable to conceive me otherwise. i was conceived at what would have otherwise been the third trimester of her pregnancy.

i understand that we probably have come to different conclusions on what is right and wrong but as a woman who both owes her life to an abortion and has had one herself, i believe that each case is different and that each woman needs to make her decision each time. maybe other people will disagree with this but it isn't my boyfriend carrying a child in his body for 9 months so i didn't think he had a say in my decision, his was advice to be solicited only if i wished. grandparents, aunts and uncles have absolutely no say and shouldn't unless they plan on raising the child on their own. then they are merely offering me an option because it is still my decision.

i don't consider a fetus a "baby." it can become an baby, but if i decided to have a hysterectomy would you accuse me of punishing all my unfertilized eggs? is every menstrualtion cycle filled with the blood of a murdered child? no. i am the only person involved in the equation and there is a high cost to a pregnancy even if the child goes for adoption at the end. in my mind it can be significantly higher than the cost involved in an abortion.

i've been told that there was a time when pregnancy was considered a woman's "natural" state. the evidence was of course menstrual blood which we now know isn't even really blood at all. i find it offensive that you would insinuate that my greatest value lies in my ability to procreate. children are abundant in this world and we are nearing a state of over population, it seems to me that having a child who isn't wanted simple to share the "greatest gift" that i possess would be an inherently selfish act.

i recognise that i did answer your points in a different order than you presented them but i don't really want to go back and change it now. this forum isn't for debate of morals and to be honest i find people who would judge me based on their own morals to be a little annoying. i don't believe that a personal moral system is of any use except to guide that particular persons decisions. it does not belong in politics or any group setting as far as i am concerned.
kittenb
vegdumpling - DT was pretty much "boo'ed" off the site about 2 weeks after this posting.
i_am_jan
((((((vegdumpling)))))) We're here for you sweetie.
NoSissy
QUOTE(sierra82 @ Jul 9 2008, 09:03 PM) *
I just found out yesterday that I'm pregnant. It really wasn't supposed to happen. It's not like we were careless; we unintentionally made a mistake. I really didn't feel any indication that I was pregnant, and even after the positive test I was still in denial. The only reason I took a test was because I chart my basal temperature every morning, and knew something was up when I had more than 12 days of high temps. My boyfriend and I have discussed before what we would do in this kind of situation, and after talking about it last night we both decided that the best thing to do is to terminate it.

But that was before the whole thing sunk in today. I'm scheduled to have the surgical termination in a week and I'm feeling super depressed about it. I'm 26, my boyfriend and I have been together for years and do plan on marriage and kids someday. He is someone that I do want to eventually have kids with, and I think that is making this all the harder. It's just not the right time -- I'm trying to finish a doctorate, he's trying to start his own business, neither of us has a permanent income source, we wouldn't even be able to live together for over another year. And we've had concrete plans concerning when we want to have kids... it's a long story but basically we KNOW we can't have a child in the kind of environment that we're in and need to wait until we're in a much more secure situation. And honestly... we're really just not ready to be good parents.

I thought I'd be able to be much more stoic about this. But I can't help but feel horrible. I'm really afraid that by the time next week rolls around, I will feel a connection to "it", because I already kind of do. I've been crying on and off all day and have already found myself hysterically apologizing to it. I'm feeling guilty and selfish even though I keep telling myself that it really is best, that a child cannot be raised properly in my current situation. My brain believes it, but my heart thinks it's a crock of shit.

I'm also really worried that all this will somehow change my relationship with my boyfriend. I'm not sure how, but it worries me. It's like, this is a product of our love, and now it's going to be destroyed. I'm also scared about the surgical procedure itself, worried that something will go wrong causing me to not be able to have a baby in the future. I will have thrown away my chance.
Please, if anyone can sympathize or offer any advice as to how to gather the strength to go through with this, please share.

Well my dear, I don't envy the decision you have to make, but it is highly unlikely that having an abortion will interfere with future pregnancy. So let that be the least of your worries. Some people are able to completely embrace having a child despite it being unplanned, but often there is a lingering unconscious vibe of resentment that will mess with a kid even if you think you'd never let such an emotion show. However, the opposite may also occur in the form of a feeling of total open hearted love an commitment. It just depends upon the people involved. As far as the effects on your relationship they can be negative OR positive. My choices actually STRENGTHENED my relationship, because my b-friend didn't HAVE a choice about being a father at 17. Those girls decided that for him, and he obviously was not ready. He is only just now figuring our how to be a REAL father to his boys, and they need ALL his attention. He knows that choosing to terminate my pregnancies was not an easy choice, but he is SO GRATEFUL that I was strong enough to do it. Not just for myself and our relationship, but for his boys. He was incredibly supportive through EVERYTHING, and the experience has strengthened our bond. You have a very different situation, and if you think your man may resent you for termination, I believe you need to take that into consideration. It is YOUR body, and YOUR CHOICE. But your choice will also decide whether he's a father or not. That's pretty huge. So talk to him about it. Make sure you're both on the same page. If you're not and he can't understand your convictions then it MAY cause you to part ways. If he says he'll support whatever you decide then he's a really good man, but emotions run deep and it's crucial that you're both being as honest as you can with YOURSELVES, and each other.

Good luck my dear.
dayglowpink
((((sierra)))) As everyone has said, abortion is never an easy decision, and there may still be emotional pain involved even if it is the right decision for you. I would encourage you to be true to yourself and make the choice that feels the most right to you. I've had two abortions, and I believe that abortion is the right choice for many women in many situations, but I also believe that sometimes practical reasoning may not be the only way to make a decision; we must take our emotions and feelings into consideration as well. Good luck.
anarch
(((sierra)))

how are you?

You've got our support, whatever is going on with you.




I just came in here to post this in case it was of interest to anybody:

"how can you help the women you love to have positive memories of their abortions? I would love to hear from readers about the factors that made a difference in their abortions being positive or negative memories."
rubberdollz
A few years ago I took my sister to have an abortion and I paid for it as well. Unfortunately she was in a position in her life that having a child was not an option. She already has 2 boys and financially having a 3rd child was not an option. I paid for it and stayed at the place with her while she had it done and you know I never would condemn my sister for doing it. I think every woman has a right to the decisions they make because it is their body.

I know that the decision was the hardest decision she had to make but she knew it was the right decision for her. I think that weighing the pros and cons of your life/situation can help you to figure out what the next step is.

No one can tell you what to do or make the decision for you.
Queen Bull
good luck sierra! i hope everything works out for you. Having an abortion was the hardest thing that i have ever done, and maybe will ever do. I know, however, that regardless, you will make the right decision for your situation.

<3's
bob4both
I probably shouldn't even be poking around in here but...

Just a comment with no judgement or predjudice intended on either side of the debate. It's just a secret I've been carrying for many years, and somehow after reading your stories, I want to share as well.

My gfriend had an abortion while I was in the Navy & out to sea. By the time I even recieved the letters of her situation, comtemplation & decision, it was done. I never had a word to say about it, though my general feeling is it was hers to make. It hurt, it still does after many, many years...maybe even more so since I have now been blessed with a daughter my own. It's not an easy decision for anyone, I don't believe.

Funny the things you'll share with strangers, and leave your family & friends in the dark about...
olivarria
(((Sierra82)))

Bob4both, my opinion is that even though it was her decision to make, it's still ok to feel sad or feel grief about an abortion. It changed the course of both your lives and conjures intense emotions and that's only natural! I have never had an abortion, but I had an (potential?) half-sibling who was aborted. I met my dad when I was 18, and he told me that an ex-girlfriend of his (not my mom) had an abortion which was his. I know this may sound strange or cruel, but my immediate feeling was relief. Because this was not a man who should reproduce. The only reason I turned out half-way decent is because I was moved away from the backwoods, racist, dead-end town we were in, and raised my a wonderful mother, and adopted by a new dad. If i had been raised in that town and by my biological father I would be a very different person, definitely for the worse.

I didn't know his ex-girlfriend, but considering the situation, I don't think the child would have a had a life of great quality. My biological dad was angry because he thought it should have been partly his decision. But consider that when my mother had me he never came to see me once, and he eagerly gave up his legal rights because he didn't pay any child support and didn't want to. He never tried to get in touch with me. So i don't know why he thinks he should have played a part in that decision!

A couple of relatives encouraged my mom to abort me. I'm happy that I'm here but of course I am pro-choice. Only the woman carrying the fetus can make that decision. I feel very offended by any legislation that tries to prevent me from controlling my own reproductive freedom, which is why I don't support Ron Paul, but that's another thread....
NoSissy
QUOTE(bob4both @ Aug 21 2008, 02:10 PM) *
I probably shouldn't even be poking around in here but...

Just a comment with no judgement or predjudice intended on either side of the debate. It's just a secret I've been carrying for many years, and somehow after reading your stories, I want to share as well.

My gfriend had an abortion while I was in the Navy & out to sea. By the time I even recieved the letters of her situation, comtemplation & decision, it was done. I never had a word to say about it, though my general feeling is it was hers to make. It hurt, it still does after many, many years...maybe even more so since I have now been blessed with a daughter my own. It's not an easy decision for anyone, I don't believe.

Funny the things you'll share with strangers, and leave your family & friends in the dark about...


Well Bob, I believe you touched on one of the important reasons for this thread. Sometimes everyone needs a place to air their feelings, and doing that here may give someone else insight on their own situation. My second abortion is pretty much a secret to everyone but my man. I'm actually ashamed that I had to do it, because after my first one i took risks with birth control thinking I would then be ready to have a child, but I was wrong. I'm embarrassed that I misjudged my own situation and then had to put myself through that again! Anyway, I believe that this thread is meant for information, compassion and insight. I don't think there is any debate here.
neurotic.nelly
I am depressed, and today, I regret it. And I feel like I am being punished, even though I know that this is BS.
deschatsrouge
((((Nelly))))
sybarite
(((Nelly)))
anarch
(((nelly)))
auralpoison
Aw, dang. (((((Nelly)))))
culturehandy
(((((((nelly)))))))
i_am_jan
((((Oh nelly)))). I know hon. Let Ma Time do her job. We'll understand it all, by and by. We are here for you. Keep in touch if need be.
kittenb
{{{nelly}}} you have all our support.
thepointybird
Bumping for all you lovelies, hope everyone's ok!
anarch
(x-posted in Perilous Position of Choice)

Feministe has an interesting discussion about "Why are even smart liberal men freaked out about abortion?"
candycane_girl
bump
anarch
Just adding some useful resources (I should probably re-post them here every so often):

Pregnancy Options Workbook

in the US,

Backline (a non-judgmental talkline for talking about being pregnant and thinking about what to do, or talking about post-abortion feelings)

Exhale (a non-judgmental post-abortion talkline)


(I did look for similar talklines in other countries but couldn't find anything, sorry)
datagirl
Tomorrow I'm booked in to have a termination.It's the second one in two years.
The whole story is in the pregnancy thread which I thank for all the Busties support.
I know now that I'm not being swayed,that I don't love the father or even respect him a whole lot either. I just feel very sad for the pregnancy.For the false potential I've built up in my head and the idea that I could have done it all alone.I can't.
I keep thinking that this time tomorrow it will be all over.The neusea and tiredness will have started to go away and I can begin to think truly about how I can get my life back on track. I honestly thought that a baby would somehow bring R and I back together and would perhaps have him love me again. I no longer want this from him.In fact I'm not even sure if I want him in my life anymore.
It's the right choice for me to make right now.I'm not going to bring a child up alone in my apartment.It would neither be good for me or the child.I'm not sure why I'm even posting all this.I'm not particularly needing support but I guess it's really for other Busties either having a termination for the first time or having to go through with it all again.The fact that I'm terminating again is upsetting in itself.I will seek councelling after tomorrow.
pollystyrene
(((datagirl)))
kittenb
{{{datagirl}}} I hope everything goes well tomorrow. Good luck with the counseling and everything.
anarch
(((datagirl)))
girltrouble
(((((datagirl)))))
auralpoison
(((((Datagirl)))))
sybarite
((((Datagirl))))
datagirl
Oh guys Thank you so much.You know some of my most personal stories.I only told three of my friends that I was pregnant and only one of them knows that I terminated yesterday.
All is well for me today thankfully. I have no side effects and weirdly my dreams last night were of a huge reunion with my high school friends.We were exchanging maroon buttons (they were a feature of our uniforms). It was a brilliantly sunny day and was held by the water at my old workplace. I don't know why but since I took my dreamcatcher out of my room my dreams are no longer violent.

My ex tried but didn't seem all that supportive at the clinic yesterday.He just held his head like he was a child in trouble for something.He didn't speak to me all that much even when I tried to make a weak joke about the sweat pants I was wearing ( I never wear sweat pants outside my house.)I had to make the atmosphere lighter for my own sake.When it was all over he just dropped me off after offering to take me to Subway!.Then he just drove off.He hasn't called and I don't really care if I never hear from him again. It was an intense,romantic relationship over the past seven months or so.We visited nude beaches in the summer,were both musicians and played some of Sydney's best venues.But It's over now and for that I'm thankful.

I'm now just waiting for the pregnancy hormones to go away and for the inevitable depression that follows after a termination.It happened last time but of course I'm hoping that I stay the way I am now.Well rested and looking forward in finding a job or perhaps going away to a retreat which my ex actually said that he was happy to pay for.So he's not all bad.Just clueless in some situations.

I truly hope I never have to go through this again,but know that I have done the right thing for me. I'm going to go shopping now and buy some bright red converse sneakers as a gift to myself to make me feel better.
Thanks again Busties.Although I may never meet any of you,you are some of the most remarkable, supportive and non judgmental of people I ever had the fortune of spilling my guts to. Thank you (((())))
crazyoldcatlady
ginormous hugs for ((((datagirl))))
sybarite
((((Datagirl))))) Come back and post here if you need to, anytime. And good for you for geting closure, for yourself, with the ex. Take care (((you)))
datagirl
Thanks sybarite and crazyoldcatlady.I really appreciate your support.
I'm still doing ok.Life is sort of normal and I still haven't had the depression that I had last time.Perhaps last time I was just in shock in what I had been through.This time is very different however.I feel ok.It may have something to do with the fact that I'm not working at the moment so there's little stress or a need to put on a 'professional' persona to anyone.
I spoke to me ex last night and after I was done being angry at him we had a somewhat civilised conversation.
He said that the reason why he was so closed off at the clinic and afterwards was that he felt numb.He couldn't penetrate the wall that he felt that I'd built (can you blame me??) And he also felt afterward that something inside of him had died. I listened patiently and had to keep reminding him that this isn't about him. I don't have it in me yet to console him.I could feel that that was what he wanted from me and that just made me more angry. As i said before,he's not a bad guy.We were both equally responsible for what happened.
I just want to go about my daily life,trying to find work and get back into a sane form of rhythm.I'm not sure whether I like men all that much.The disparity and unequality in men and women flaws me at times.Especially in regard to abortion.
No_Plastic
I've been a BUSTie for years, since high school when I was the girl who went against the grain and read what everyone thought must be lesbian porn in study hall.

That's why I came here today, because I knew if there was one place I could talk about my abortion tomorrow, it would be here. It's my first. My first pregnancy at 21, my first abortion. First, after years of being told "Nah, you'll probably always have fertility issues." Apparently not always.

I've been with M since February or so- not long. We have ups and downs, but we're pretty solid as far as couples go. We're friends first and foremost.

I knew something wasn't right last week. I was nauseous all the time, and a few other factors came into play that I didn't even pinpoint until after (sensitive nipples, emotional rollercoaster, etc.). Saturday night, driving home from his house at 1 a.m., I stopped at a grocery store on a whim almost and had a grumpy old man unlock the case for me so I could buy a test and sneak off to their bathroom.

It was positive, of course.

He lives with his dad while he's in school (he'll be a senior in college this coming year), and I live with my mom while I'm.. not. I called his house, his dad answered, he woke Matt up and put him on the phone. When I started babbling incoherently, unable to say anything more specific than "I took a test.." he drove out to meet me.

After one more positive result (two for two), we decided straightaway that we'd have to terminate. I'd just turned 21, and if it happened when we thought it did.. excessive birthday celebrations overlapped the pregnancy by a few weeks. On top of that, I'm a smoker, making this a really healthy first trimester. Beyond all this came our own personal feelings. Neither of us is ready to be a parent- not while he's in school, not while I'm working a crap job managing web sales for a small company. It's just not... responsible of us to bring a child into this world.

So I went to the clinic today for my consult, and he went with me. We were escorted into the building by a very sweet (though potentially very scary given how armed and massive he was) security guard, past the protesters with their signs and their prayers for my mortal soul. Everything else went smoothly, and I'm not really afraid, not exactly. I'm six weeks and three days pregnant, and I saw the ultrasound. Tomorrow won't be easy. It's not supposed to be. We'll cuddle and cry afterward, and probably watch the Princess Bride and other comfort-movies. I'm just happy to have his support and care in all of this, just like I'm happy to give him mine.

End long rambling story and begin soapbox- We're making the best choice, for us. It's no one else's decision to make. I'm not proud of this, but I'm not ashamed either. If I'm ashamed of anything, its of the fact that I was irresponsible to begin with.

Someday, when I'm ready, I'd love to be a mom. Hell, I'd love to be a mom now, but I know that's one of the worst things I could do for myself at the moment, not while my life is still in chaos.

Reading what you women (and men too) have had to say has been inspiring. Saturday I worried I wasn't strong enough and today I know I will be.
auralpoison
(((((No_Plastic))))) You guys sound like you are doing what's right for you right now. You have no illusions, you've got your heads on straight. If you should need us, know that Busties are around & we've got yer back, huh? We'll be thinking of you & yours.

And to make you smile . . . I'm thirty-four & just bought a copy of Bust with my ultra-conservative, Jesus freak auntie in tow. Trying to explain that Bust is a "women's magazine, but not a dumb one" when the cover mentions something about a woman likening her lady parts to looking like Mick Jagger? Her flipping through & coming across a clearly lesbian one-handed read? Yeah, that was an awkward ride home!
kittenb
{{{{datagirl}}}}

{{{No_PLastic}}} Sorry I'm late to the conversation. I hope everything went well and you are doing okay. Feel free to post anytime.
buttercups
Hey ladies, I just wanted to let all of you know that I used to work at Planned Parenthood and I was a patient advocate helping women with support during the actual abortion procedure. I hope you all know how strong you truly are and I will always admire you for making the best decision you can make for you- regardless of what that decision may be. If anyone needs help/support or has any questions I can try my best to help because I've been privileged enough to have had the opportunity to help so many women already during this difficult time. There is already so much wonderful support on this forum and if there is anything I can do please let me know.
<3 buttercups
auralpoison
I hope everybody is doing well post-procedure.
anarch
Ours To Tell: first hand accounts of abortion experiences
LangleyHeidi
I agree with the poster above and think that everyone is free to choose. I have to confess, I went through an abortion when I was 20, and I don't regret it - I was just a student, and even if I left my college, how would I work with a baby to care for? My partner was reluctant to help me, and in this case it is a better way than giving birth to a child who will live in hunger and will be deprived of a happy childhood.
anarch
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